So I just found out yesterday that I'm going to be a father, my girlfriend is 5 weeks pregnant. I will be 23 when he/she is born and she will be 21.
How many of you Sup Forumsrothers havery kids? How old were you when you had them? Do you regret it?
Pic not related, all my files of her are larger than 2mb. Does anyone know how to change that on your phone? I've got OC for days
>INB4 not you virgin Sup Forumstards
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You have no chance to ever live life to the fullest because a child now depends on you and you will be a slave to the family
You need two fuck offs.
firstly, fuck off back to r eddit.
then fuck off back to r / redpill.
OP: it's true you've taken on a huge responsibility that will affect your life, but don't hate on it like this asshole. make a good legacy for yourself and a good life for your children by raising them well. one thing though is how you're not married to her, hope she's a good life partner choice and you can marry her, to split up with be challenges for both of you and the child.
not a father rn
not sure I will be
but what i can tell you is that this will be an experience that tests both you, her, your relationship, and your future
but i think you can do it. Just remember that what you do from now on is important so think big, think ahead, and think safe and you will be alright
also your kid will be graduating from hs before your friends will so you get more down time as an adult
woo
Thanks user, that's a great way to look at it. And Thankfully she is my best friend, the love of my life. I've never found anyone I get along with as much as her. I've never loved or liked or cared for her as much as I have anyone else. I was mostly sure I wanted to marry her before this happened. That's probably why I haven't been stressing about it at all. I'm very excited acutally
>In before she leaves you and you are fucked for 18+ years of child support.
OP is retarded.
Thanks user that's great advice. I love it when Sup Forumsrothers can actually talk to eachother about stuff without fighting and calling wachother faggots all night
Luckily im pretty sure that's not going to happen. But you know women, always trifilin
Do you want a kid? If so, congratulations. Was it unexpected? If so, your life is getting ready to change for the next 18 years.
Give us more info op. How long have you known/been with her, were you planning on getting married soon, will you get married now that a child is in the wings, do you or her or both of you have a steady paying job, were either of you planning on going to college (or have you already), was it planned, etc etc. Having a child can be hands down the most rewarding experience if you are ready, but if you arent prepared for it the stress will take years off your life. 23 and 21 is too young to become parents imo, but it depends more on you and your gf than anything else
I mean yeah we agreed to try last month. I guess we didn't acutally think it would happen cuz its never happened in the past, so it was a little unexpected. But we did try for this to happen and a big part of us did want it to. So thanks you, in excited.
Do any of u have kids? How many?
Yeah I agree, I would have liked to wait another year but we both want kids so it's not bad that it happened. And we have been dating steady for 15 months, been seeing eachother for 2 years. I did plan on asking her to marry me in a year or two. I'm working full time bringing home $400 a week and she is applying to start college and get student loans. My family has enough money to help us if we ever need it, and she has enough family close to help us babysit aND whatnot, so I think we will be okay financially. It's true tho, baby's make racecar parts disappear
Im 30, i have two kids. First one when i was 27 and the 2nd at 28. This is going to sound corny but i didnt know what true love is til i had my kids. Its almost an overwhelming feeling.
I feel ya. I thaught I knew what love is until I met her. We are so perfect together, love and hate almost all the same things, have the same goals and morals, are both family oriented, I truly believe we are made for eachother. This isn't a word I use often but I can say I'm blessed. And I feel like waiting would have been smart but what are ya gonna do
I love my life like you love your kids.
You are fucked. Honestly you could be lucky that 1 inn a long shot. Things will change quick when baby comes and you are in for a shock. Not with baby, you'll be fine dont worry there. Its her going to cause you're real problems. This day and age. You are proper fucked mate
Just turned 21 and have a little one on the way. No denying shit will be tough but it won't annihilate your life like some fags say it will. Great test for the two of you and it definitely shows their true personality. Just hope it isn't retarded
Pic related
ITT: bunch of MP3 millennial faggots who can't even files taxes properly believing having a kid at 21 and everything will be alright.
This ain't an episode of some family sitcom faggots , let me tell you how your life is going to be
>be you 21 year old cuck faggot
>baby is born
>gf or cum dumpster is on a free ride for 3 years "I don't have to work because I'm raising a BABY"
>you start working more to support the failure that is your child and semen leech
>you start building up resentment that this semen receptacle doesn't have to work
>"well maybe you should get a job too candice!"
>that slight pain in your nuts is not testicular cancer but it's them tucking deep into your body when she mentions child support
>you ain't going to get much fucking done because she's stressed about the child and your sub par effort at supporting them and because much less she still incapable of properly cleaning or caring for her own vagina
>"you are the love of my life babe"
>door opens , you walk in , she's fucking someone who has no kids and makes her feel like can regain some independence because you became so fucking boring from raising a family.
>"sorry Cody , I have to live my life too"
>you cry , she cries , she leaves , a bullet travels at 2,500 feet per second from the barrel towards your forhead
Should of worn a condom you cuck fagget
Damn, that was a nice post I'm impressed
I was out eating dinner, back now
anyways,
thought that you should also see about looking into developmental psych. IDK if you are in college but that class is tough but you learn a whole bunch about how we grow up.
How you treat her, and how she treats you will be the standard of which they base their relationships on. I am glad to hear you are excited, there will be lulls and ups and downs but that is the whole point. The thing you will remember most is not the end product, but the journey. also, if i may, please PLEASE do not let your kids get raised by an ipad or iphone. do not let technology corrupt them at an early age. being outside, or reading or playing board games will be much more memorable and beneficial to your child and you
Aw sweet, dude. Sweet.
oops, i am this user
my bad
I'm 34. had my son at 30. before that had stepson since I was 25.
it's hard work but don't let these basement dwellers scare you. sure you see other kids and get annoyed but they are not YOUR kid. All I will say is that you will want to come home from work just to spend time with your kids.
you'll be fine. Most practical challenge is daycare or baby sitting while you work. that's it.
This guy is a fucking loser who lost all hopes and ambitions and is going counter by saying he has a sweet hobby when in reality he just comes home , masturbates, drinks a beer and goes to sleep.
If you want serious advice, happy to give it.
I have a 3yr old and another one on the way.
We met at 25 married at 29 and had our first child at 35.
In hind sight I wish we had started a little earlier. We are set up financially and my wife stays at home with the kids and does the books for my business.
The first 6 weeks with a baby is about the hardest time you will have in your whole life and you definitely won't be your gfs top priority any more...
But without a doubt being a dad is the most rewarding thing going in the world and I would swap my place for a one bedroom flat if I had to choose between my life now or not having my daughter running to meet me at the door when I get home from work.
ur gay
abortion or suicide is the only option OP
Shitposting aside , it's probably going to be great. I definitely wish I had a kid to build couch forts and watch The Land Before Time or to play pranks on them and tell spooky stories . You just got to grow up fast Op. And don't raise a faggot, stay away from technology and raise a good family. It's going to be OK. You're a man now OP , so act like one
this
it doesn't matter if your black, white, poor or rich.
you're statistically better off for upward mobility if you have a married (either legally or basically) mom and dad.
Op here, Thanks for all the advice Sup Forumsrothers. And dont worry, my kid will not have an ipad or a television until they are 13, and wont have a phone or video gsmes until they can afford to buy them themselves and undersrand hard work. And honeslty I'm impressed this thread is still Alive anot hour and a half later
2 and one on the way. no i don't regret it and they're turning out pretty well so far . i was 19 she was 18 . just be a good and responsible father and you'll be ok . hopefully you knocked up a decent girl from a decent family who actually cares about you though cause thats fucking key
Kill yourself!
he might get lucky and beat the odds and be such a negative nancy
Also stay away from Sup Forums and join the military if school has no prospects for you. When I say military I mean the airforce or the navy and aim for any job with a security clearance. Have a nice life bud
I'm a brown belt in BJJ and runs a triathlon every 2 or 3 months. I also have an MBA since 2010 and make about $110k a year and have my own house.
1. Abortion/adoption
2. Get a vasectomy
Don't fall for the having kids meme. Waste of time and money
Fatherfag here. Biggest regret of my life. I don't mean to make cast a dark cloud over your future OP but you know when you hear of stories from married men on how you should never get married or have kids? And then you brush them off like they don't know what they're talking about? Well, they know exactly what they're talking about. The next 20 years of your life are now someone else's, and you have to live every day trying to keep your wife happy just so she won't uproot your life that you've now created with her. If you don't keep her happy, she'll divorce you, take everything you've worked for, and contemplate suicide.
Don't get me wrong, I love my kids and they love me, that's a very rewarding feeling having someone that depends on you, but if I could do it over again, I'd stay single for the rest of my life.
You better get a dna test to see if that baby is really yours seen to many people get rekt by lying cheating hoes
Fucking based
ABSOLUTELY BASED
And you prob suck a mean dick too while wearing your wife's panties faggot
Got a vasectomy at 23, don't know why you didn't. Kids are the worst.
Enjoy living a life of stress and always being tired. Dumb bitch
My nigga. Got mine when I was 24.
Care to elaborate? What was the recovery like?
Hurts for 3 days
cost me $900 without insurance
I'm
27. Wife gave birth to my son when we were 22. Kids are great, if you apply yourself to the responsibility of being a good father. Good Father = Good kid.
I love going on adventures with my kiddo and teaching him all kinds of things. He's a pretty competent little helper when I'm working on projects too.
And in my experience having my son put all of life into the right perspective.
You will go through some low points and wish for freedom from responsibility once in a while but stay true and be a good man regardless.
Also pro tip, read to your kid every night. It's the best thing you can do for your children's literacy and IQ.
Remember, you're completely replaceable in today's society. You can work your ass off, love your wife, raise your kid in the most loving way. But, the moment your girl gets bored/horny/manipulated by her friends, she can end everything. She'll get praised for being "strong" and she'll dump YOUR child on another victim. You on the other hand, you will be ostracized, laughed at for not being good enough and left utterly broken.
I had my kid when I was 20 and ex was 19.
He's 2 years old now.
To be honest I hate having a kid, everything would be so much easier without one. I recommend everyone to never have kids.
>but
Whenever you see you kid, or he laughs a certian way or whatever you light up a little. It's hard to be depressed when you're with your child. Also whenever he cries I natually whimper a little, it's weird. You form a bond somehow that nothing really competes with. But I still hate having a kid, even though he's the only thing I'd actually die for.
Her age is another hint at the fate to come.
Yeah. Truth be told OP, you were simply born in the wrong generation. Fathers used to be something to be revered, respected, and admired for in society. It was a sign of accomplishment and status, but only because your wife did everything you told her to to keep you happy.
Things aren't like that anymore. Fathers have been relegated to sperm donors. One fuck up and you're toast. Sorry man. That's just the reality of it. The only way to live a rewarding life with a woman today is by moving to a second rate region that is more traditional, like Asia, South America or eastern Europe. American women have been poisoned.
.
I second this.
Could be my words.
Only I was 29 when my doughter was born.
Pro tip: Life close to your kid's grandparents. My parents love to take care of the kids and my wife and me go partying with our friends.
>be 33
>no kids
>no wife
>moved into a van at 28
>traveled across the Americas
>fucking bitches everywhere I go
>constant hookups and parties and music festivals
>bonfires and surf gatherings
Can;t say I regret not having kids OP. Sorry man.
Had my first at 16, dropped out and took care of my girl and daughter. Second was born two weeks ago. Im 28 now. Its chillin. Be there for your kid its easier then you think.
This is true. I knocked up a pregnant woman. No one's happy. But the kid is really cute.
Excuse me; a married woman.
thirty five
kid is 11
kids are absolutely a colossal abyss needs and wants.
run.
dude there is NO DOUBT ABOUT IT that raising children destroys your hopes, dreams and any potential you may have had is immediately FUCKED.
take your marriage, take your children and fuck off back to the dark ages where that kind of bullshit is appreciated.
I'll take my money, career, leisure, travel over that mind numbing bollocks anyday.
any basic shithead can have a kid. don't be mediocre.
that's so sad that you never found true love without having to have children :(
i hope things get better. it's really sad when people have such little potential that the only way they can find fulfilment is through kids.
that sounds pretty lame man.
I prefer all the freedom in the world. not that mess.
What kind of work do you do OP and what does your GF do? It's going to be a giant strain, and I hope your parents are well off and you have a good relationship with them.
Sister just had her baby, 26 year old with not much job experience and no education. It's a giant money-sink for my parents.
Have had a few friends that were young families while I was in the military. They were actually happy and seemed like good parents as they had a stable job and the military to help them out.
Consider joining the Air Force or Navy so you don't get blown up right away. Also volunteer for South Korea so you don't have to go to a warzone as it's counted as a deployment.
>But without a doubt being a dad is the most rewarding thing going in the world
I have 3 kids and I fucking disagree.
Maybe it's fine if you only stick to one, heh.
Wait a few years when people get onto their second and third children. Now that's the stink of misery. I regret it a lot.
I'm in exactly the same boat.
If I could turn back the clocks I'd just be single forever and enjoy the selfish childfree life. Imagine how much money and travelling I would have done. Oh well.
when the kids came, the travelling ended. vacations with children are NOT vacations. be ready for it - it really does change your life forever. :/
I'm 30. Wife is 29. We have a 7 week old baby!!!!!
It's a shit show. Prepare to never sleep and never be alone again. I recommend taking a prenatal class. I learned tons about the birthing process and how to not kill my baby.
I also highly recommend getting the best ear plugs you can get. I use custom ones that I use for motorcycling. Fucking babies cry loud and long like little dicks. Ear plugs help me sleep while the wife takes him and she puts ear plugs in when I take care of him.
All in all. It's the most rewarding thing I've ever done. It's only 7 weeks in. Good luck.
got mine when I was 33. best decision ever.
31, have a son.
Sure it takes work, but really, what the fuck else are you going to do with your life? Drugs and bitches? Boring and gay, and you will die alone and sad.
Before, I thought I had to save the world. Knowledge is a heavy burden and all...
Now, I just have to raise a kid. Fuck it, it's his problem now...
>To be honest I hate having a kid, everything would be so much easier without one. I recommend everyone to never have kids.
>>but
GREAT advice my man
The dumbest among us are reproducing the fastest, and you're working to reverse that trend.
Thank you.
I've got two boys (one turned 5 last October, other turning 9 next month). Wife and I were a bit older than you guys when we started, and we were already married. Yes, it's trying at times, sometimes very much so; no, I don't regret it.
It's a big change, you've suddenly got someone else there who's completely dependent on you, so you're going to take that into consideration. It messes up your schedule a bit, but you get used to that. Yes, sex still happens, but you might have to wait a couple of months after the birth. Wife and I fucked six out of seven days last week.
Best parenting advice my dad ever gave me was, "You don't have to make the same mistakes we did." You saw what your own parents did/didn't do, think about what you want to do better. Sure, you'll make your own mistakes, because no-one's perfect. Also, every kid is different - what works for one kid won't necessarily work for another. You can take advice from trustworthy, experienced people, but in the end you've got to make your own choices. Don't take bullshit from idiots with no kids who talk like they're experts at parenting. Also, if someone has kids who are little shits, they're probably going to give pretty bad parenting advice, so you can ignore them, too.
> Before, I thought I had to save the world. Knowledge is a heavy burden and all...
> Now, I just have to raise a kid. Fuck it, it's his problem now...
I wish you had focused on saving the world, not raising some kid. You had potential and now you're the same as every commoner.
Your gravestone will say "Did the same as everyone else on his mediocre street"
Just saw your post that answered a lot of the questions. Do you work retail or is it a craft/career? If it's retail go to a recruiter tomorrow. You'll be able to support your wife while she goes to school and your parents will be proud that their son is self-reliant.
Stay in 4 years, than leave with experience and a GI Bill so you don't have to pay for your kids school.
I will fail at reversing that trend. The dumbshits are totally reproducing much faster than smart people ever will.
They typically don't have much to live for so parenthood gives them a purpose.
Enjoy no sex life.
oh look this thread again.
personally I hate kids and I always have.
I'm really just indifferent in the same way I've never given a fuck about horses or tennis. Kids are someone elses problem. I've got too much else to focus on.
Also, I like projects that have a financial reward, not a financial burden.
Okay you can have my story about having children,
Okay i had my first child at 22 was a second year nurse. In the space of 3 years before i had my second child i had travelled to Italy, London and New Zealand and finished my midwifery.
Your life only becomes shit and useless if you dont try and be a good parent. You do loose alot of your own time, just set goals for yourself and include your family.
Don't listen to the cucks but it is hard having a family.
Good luck man you will be fine.
I am 28 and have three kids. I was 23 when I had my first. There are pros and cons in having offspring. Just remember that just because you have kids, life isn't over. It just changes. Some of the changes are good and some bad aslong as YOU stay responsible as a parent you wont Fuck them too much
or be selfish and you don't need to deal with any of that bullshit
Wow, you must not have kids/be a joke of a parent. GTFO with that garbage chad
Somebody check my digits
Way off the mark. Parents raising children properly and with love is what this world needs more than anything.
Go visit Seattle or some other "progressive" west coast city where people shun monogamy and child rearing like the devil so they can party and fuck and smoke and drink into their 60's because it's trendy and all... What happens in the end? They all die, having learned nothing, having taught nothing. They just die.
Recovery is nothing more than a nuisance. It's a little strange and obviously not pleasant. But never having to worry about getting someone pregnant and having spontaneous bareback sex always is quite the plus.
I have friends with kids and they all look tired and old and they never have time and/or money yet they enslave all week at their jobs.
I still have no kids, thanks to the extra time and money I started my own business and I travel wherever I want whenever I want and still party almost every weekend.
Being an adult with no kids is fucking awesome, but I do know some people that love being parents despite their kids sucking their life, so there's that.
Not same guy, but obviously he doesn't have kids.
I don't either and not planning on having any atleast till high 20's. I'm not going to spend my younger years taking care of some retard and putting my life on hold.
Advance your career than worry about having a child. It's 1000x times harder to do any type of training or education when you have a young kid. It's unresponsible to bring a kid into a world where you are working some shit-tier job.
fuck off, turd.
FUCK OFF
Kek will not look kindly upon you
You are a fucking moron. Let her have the kid and give it up for adoption because you asshats obviously are too stupid to keep the condom on much less successfully raise a child you worthless fuck ups. I may not be good at fucking girls but at least I dont fuck my own life and some poor child who is going to have a mouth breathing asshat as a father. I hope your life is as terrible as it should be. God I hate trash.
My friend had a kid at pretty much the same age with a girl that was also about your girlfriends age. A year after his daughter was born his girlfriend said she didnt love him anymore and they broke up. After a few months she began to complain about having to raise her own daughter and expected my friend to take on most of the responsibility despite the fact that he was living and working one state away. He drove 7 hours every weekend to help out and spend time with his daughter (who was basically being raised by his parents because his ex was leeching off of them) and she still bitched that he wasnt around. After a while his parents kicked her out of their house. They are currently going to court because she is demanding more child support. Good job OP. Congratulations, you played yourself. Push her down the stairs now and reclaim your life.
If she doesn't abort consider leaving and joining the French Foreign Legion.