Wake up

>Wake up
>Find girlfriend in bathroom with pregnancy test
>She tells you that she is pregnant
What do you do?

wonder when I got a girlfriend

Put your ass to her mouth and fart, gas the fucker out

I'm a fag, so I'd wonder who's fucking girlfriend is pregnant in my bathroom.

>Tfw
I will never get the gf

/thread

Kick her out as would any of us because we are all virgins

support her decision, and be a fucking amazing father.

say "That's great babe, this is the best news ever! I love you so much" and give her a hug and a kiss

Wake up again because I can only have a girlfriend in my dreams

OP kek

"Who the hell are you? I haven't had a girlfriend in seven years."

...

call the doctor, i overdosed again

Falcon punch.

figure out how i'm gonna tell my wife

leave the country

ha! jokes on you OP! hands can't get pregnant!

Start decorating the extra bedroom in the house I own as a nursery, because I have my life together and I'm with the love of my life.

>so when we going to the abortion clinic? I got school tomorrow

Untangle a coat hanger

Tell her to push real hard and then flush the baby down the toilet

I'd be doing us both a favor with a massive cunt punt. I'm 42 and she's 43, so if by some freak occurrence she got knocked up, that kid would be potato as fuck.

Tell her that I love her

You know that age is not genetic, right?

Op kek

A 43 year old having a child puts the child at risk for mental disorders and genetic disorders, as well as increase chances of miscarriages for the mother.

You know that sperm and eggs age horribly, right? Look at the incidence of Down's as the mother's age goes higher.

Give her the choice between the stairs and the coat hanger

Wake up

I tell her about my vasectomy