I talked to a vegan the other night.
Immediately, She entered a rant on animals rights and attempted to inform me about the cruel, irrelevant conditions farm animals in Africa experience.
At this point I revealed that my eating preferences revolved around a wholesome diet of meat, eggs, cows milk, vegetables and fruit.
She visibly choked up, eyes beginning to water. I knew she saw me as the enemy, the devil, the source of all evil in the world.
Before she could get a word out, I quickly added that I had spoken to another vegan earlier that night and that he had dispensed reprimand regarding my diet choice (this was a bluff), and that I understood his stance fully, however the vegan culture and brute force was the wrong way to go to convince meat-eaters to stop eating meat.
Her PETA training never prepared her for this. She was at a loss of words. She knew that in order to save the animals, she had to be a special snowflake and could not conform to a negative culture, but yet she had to do something. Veganism would change the world if everyone just believed.
A few moments passed in silence as her brain worked overtime, struggling to find a passive attack without appearing like a 'tool'. The long term lack of Vitamin D and Omega-3 had degraded her mind once powerful enough to push her through her arts degree. Eventually she sighed and murmured "Yeah."
I decided to let her down easily as she was such a good sport, avoiding empty death threats of sending me off to the butchers and seeing how I liked it.
"I buy from sustainable sources where the animals are well treated and I never buy caged eggs." She looked back up at me with a tear trailing down her left cheek, brow raised."Really?" I smiled. "Yep."
Later, we entered small talk which quickly evolved to flirting. We later went back to the hostel room and fucked. It was the first night in years that she had a pork sword in her mouth.
I had done it. I had cured veganism. I ate McDonalds later that night.
