/epl/

>Saturday
15:00 Man City v Middlesbrough
15:00 West Ham v Stoke
15:00 Bournemouth v Sunderland
15:00 Burnley v Crystal Palace
17:30 Chelsea v Everton

>Sunday
12:00 Arsenal v Tottenham
14:15 Liverpool v Watford
14:15 Hull v Southampton
15:00 Swansea v Man Utd
16:30 Leicester v West Brom

*dabs seductively*

Wish I had that ball to be honest

City 3-1 Middlesbrough
West Ham 2-2 Stoke
Bournemouth 2-0 Sunderland
Burnley 2-1 Crystal Palace
Chelsea 2-1 Everton

Arsenal 3-3 Tottenham
Liverpool 3-0 Watford
Hull 0-1 Southampton
Swansea 0-1 Man Utd
Leicester 2-1 West Brom

>de goey

Rate my meme lads.

Haha, lads I just remembered a few weeks ago I was arguing with an aussie who thought United could close the gap and win the league

haha :')

>poogba

>Look at him Jesus, look at him.

Terrible. Is this Sup Forums now? Black twitter memes?

That's actually pretty good. What the hell is the context though?

How's life on the spectrum?

>Aston Villa owner Tony Xia is actually going to turn Witton into a football theme park

Where were you when China saved football?

MUH POPPIES

the context is when the squad sees a solid 10 walk into the club

pic

fuck off Mohamed

MUH REMEMBRANCE

i wish

Can't wait for this years re-write of do they know it's christmas

Why is everybody shitting on Spurs? By this stat they actually doing very well, they're just playing amazing GK's.

>267,000,000 Kit-Kit Chunkys for a sub-Saharan Jack Rodwell

Absolute fucking joke, Cattermole should two foot that cunt

pretty sure spurs have had more difficult fixtures too

They're taking terrible shots, because Kane is the only one who can consistently score and he's injured.

Ireland was allowed to have it's 100 Anniversary of "MUH REBELLION AGAINST EVIL BRITS MUH FAMINE MUH CROMWELL!" on it's shirt. It only got punished because Scotland and English FA went "This is you being fucking pricks against us, you didn't call them on it, so call them or it.".

Which they have JUST done so. Furthermore, whatever happens to Ireland will HAVE to be done to Scotland and England. Be it fines, bans, deductions, disqualification.

The best bit is? The rules are written by England, Scotland, Wales and Norn Island FA's. But the rules don't actually say what the punishment from FIFA should be.

>3% conversion rate
lel

they don't even look like scoring though

>The rules are written by England, Scotland, Wales and Norn Island FA's
And FIFA. Rules can't be made without FIFA voting for them but FIFA can't make rules without anyone else backing them

What that graphic doesn't show you is that half of those shots are Eriksen taking potshots from 30 yards out. In a way, I think Spurs have actually been terrible for his development as a player. If he was at a better club, he wouldn't dare try that shit and he would stick to what he's good at (passing).

Did you see the guy on Question Time with a poppy the size of his head?

Arsenal 3-4 Liverpool
Lester 0-0 Arsenal
Watford 1-3 Arsenal
Arsenal 2-1 Southampton
PSG 1-1 Arsenal
Hull 1-4 Arsenal
Nott. Forest 0-4 Arsenal
Arsenal 3-0 Chelsea
Arsenal 2-0 Basel
Burnley 0-1 Arsenal
Arsenal 3-2 Swansea
Arsenal 6-0 Ludo Raz
Arsenal 0-0 Middlesbrough
Sunderland 1-4 Arsenal
Ludo Raz 2-3 Arsenal

Everton 1-1 Spurs
Spurs 1-0 Palace
Spurs 1-1 Liverpool
Stoke 0-4 Spurs
Spurs 1-2 Monaco
Spurs 1-0 Sunderland
Spurs 5-0 Gillingham
Middlesbrough 1-2 Spurs
CSKA 0-1 Spurs
Spurs 2-0 Man City
West Brom 1-1 Spurs
Bayer Leverkusen 0-0 Spurs
Bournemouth 0-0 Spurs
Liverpool 2-1 Spurs
Spurs 1-1 Lester
Spurs 0-1 Bayer Leverkusen

They about equal out. Spurs might be slightly worse off due to Liverpool in EFL.

Well I mean, they're not off target that much more, so it means the GK is savingthem. I mean, look at that, Spurs have a higher possession rate as well. They have only 5 less total shots. I honestly don't see them losing this weekend.

I too visit le sportbible :^)

Don't forget to carve today lads

Actually went for a carvery on tuesday

It was a bit shit

Well, the rules that have been broken were made by Ifab, which FIFA upholds. But these rules don't state the correct punishment. The assumed response to the Easter Rebellion is expected to be a fine. But if it IS a fine, then that's the worst England and Scotland can get without it being fucking bullshit.

Childhood is posting carvery memes like an autistic faggot.
Adulthood is realising carvery is fucking shit and forcing a meme is pathetic.

Will england get a points deduction in the qualifiers if we wear poppies?

We're going to struggle to qualify as is

better than the balloon door list

unlikely, but FIFA are going to have to do it both us and Ireland. It'll probably be a fine. I think at worst it'll be a fine and playing 3 matches behind closed doors.

...

Wait, so there's another player of the year award?

>Samposting too deep for you

>imagine not rating carvery memes

>We're going to struggle to qualify as is

but england are GOATs at qualifying

we just shit the bed at the tournament, when it actually matters

there used to be balloon door and fifa poty
then they merged for 5 or 6 years
and now they've split up again

Anyone want to edit this?

Gareth Southgate is currently our manager and our best option after him is Edddie Howe.

Plus FIFA have just fined Iran for religious statements in a wcq match. They can't dock us points after that

Whose faces do you want on it?
Check out some of my other work

Zidane on the right and Mourinho on the left

wait no I changed my mind, Mourinho on the right and Zlatan on the left

Quick! Say one positive thing about your biggest rival!

They're not as good as they could be.

they have a great manager

They'll probably justify a harsher ban by going "b-b-but you did it on purpose and defied us!"

excellent noodle and pillow sponsors

Same rival

They managed to fill their staium on sunday.

why did they only give our fans like 1500 seats

it was 2000 and to avoid violence

or maybe they're just not used to seeing a completely full stadium and were worried if there weren't any empty seats the players would get confused

It's good, but you still need to kill yourself.

Invincibles season

How shit is Sane for 47m though? Retards should have gone for Brandt instead

They didn't realise that De Bruyne was the exception to the buying Bundesliga players meme.

t. Sosa.

Daily reminder this man said this.

Daily reminder that Alan Shearer went even further and said only Aguero is World Class in EPL.

Daily reminder Gary went "What about Pogba?" and nobody had a clue if he was being serious or not.

>only Aguero is World Class in EPL.
He never would have said such bollocks like "EPL"

This meme HAS to stop.

There are dozens of Premier Leagues in the world. There is a reason this is called /epl/ not /pl/ you fucking retard.

(You).

good post, until
>Swansea 0-1 Man Utd

There is no way utd don't concede in that game.

And you see all of them being discussed here?

Maybe you'd prefer american sports if you have such a desire to fit a 3 letter name to your leagues

I don't think you realise how shit Swansea are, lad.

Yes. I've seen the SPL discussed in here, specifically Celtic and Rogers.

Autism.

That isn't just called "Premier League" though (not even called Scottish Premier League, Scottish Premiership)

>there are people on Earth who will watch the Scottish League game tonight

Hey I think Martinez is a good player. I won't specify WHICH Martinez. You'll just have to assume who I'm talking about. Maybe you'd prefer the rest of the world's naming conventions if you have such a desire to fit a forename and surname when mentioning people.

Swansea always do well against the "big" teams. UTD are certainly still classified in that bracket. And I'm pretty sure Swansea are their bogey team too. I'm thinking they snatch a score draw

That's irrelevant. The abbreviating of PL could be referring to it or several other leagues.

Retired years ago

>mfw I thought /epl/ being triggering was just a meme

this is going to be amazing. I'm just going to use this from now on specifically.

In response to the autist over "epl", in fairness we should rename the german league "GBL"

coming to liverpool la

>he doesn't rate Roberto Juan Martínez Martínez

I agree. Austria is fed up of being ignored.

He was, but he got mugged after this so cancelled.

t. Jaap "Plaasjaapie" Niehuizen

>poopies

So, who you lads looking forward to joining the EPL from the EFL next season?

Player or team?

Villa fan so i'm hoping >we manage to get in

but it's unlikely.

Brighton would b nice

Owls

Team. I want Newcastle back so dross like Swansea can go back down. I also wouldn't mind Leeds or Reading. The former would just be for the fucking orgasming that the media will go over them.

Villa would be nice too. I would just like Leeds just for bants and the 'rivalries'.

Swansea have been up for 5 years, won the EFL trophy and made it to the knock out stages of Europa, how the fuck are they dross compared to Poocastle?

They're welsh

also trip on 190kg

I wonder how Newcastle fans feel about pic related now that he's been gone for a while

He was literally their best player

Homeless man's David Luiz

So you've no argument, ok

We're having an Sup Forums meetup tomorrow

Transgender and Man City fans ONLY

t. Dave "Davey" Jones-Davies

FUUUUUUUCK FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

LUKAKU WILL SCORE
>LUKAKU WILL SCORE
NO CLEAN SHEET
LUKAKU WILL SCORE
>LUKAKU WILL SCORE
NO CLEAN SHEET
LUKAKU WILL SCORE
>LUKAKU WILL SCORE
NO CLEAN SHEET
LUKAKU WILL SCORE
>LUKAKU WILL SCORE
NO CLEAN SHEET

FUCKING RUIN US REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK ITS GONNA HAPPEN JUST PUT US OUT OF OUR MISERY. TELL ME THIS ISNT A FUCKING DREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAM


FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

Brighton. New teams are always fun. Yo-yo teams are the worst.

what the fuck