Roast me

roast me

you are beautiful

*roast beef

thank god you will die quickly and never get kids

I love you but you need jesuz

I'm not hungry, but you could feed a small village for a month

you have a shiny bellend

Be proud of who you are. You are a child of God. We love you

On second thought, no.

you're a blimp. 2/10

You are overweight which is considered unattractive.

...

I don't have enough coal.

/thread

...

life roasted you enough

you or the guy in the picture?

i mean, that guy's fat and naked, but you're the one who saved his picture on your computer. so, if there was a fagottmeter, you'd be somewhere between bernie sanders and elton john right now.

which is probably exactly where you'd wanna be anyway.

Sure, but first: put an apple in your mouth

I didnt know your balls were Klingon

If I roasted you, you'd probably eat yourself

this is what happens when a redneck fucks a pig

what happened to ur ceiling

Fuck, roast you!
Never Extinguish the fire FFS.

fix the fucking lights you lazy shit

the best roast would be to simply put a mirror in front of you...

You are fat.

I wanna nibble the nipples of those plump Pepsi-tits, then bite harder as I give you an atomic pink-belly then fap
you to the ultimate obese orgasm.

*Faggometer

theres no need to roast you when you look so tired of your own situation already

Just because of how gross this stains the name of "human" I'm going to voat for fatpeoplehate