I miss you dad. It's been six months since you passed and not a single fucking day passes without the thought of you on my mind. Takes a lot to not break down, with each day getting just a little bit harder than the last.
She isn't here to help me either. She left me 2 weeks before you passed. I wanted to wait to tell you, since we were together for 5 years and took care of you. You died without knowing I was alone.
I miss you both. I love you both. Not a day passes I don't consider suicide. This listlessness is strange. I'll never see you again, and I will never have her again.
How are the rest of my Sup Forumsrothers? Baww thread I guess. Or wallpapers. I don't quite care actually.
Posting my favorite wallpapers that make me feel I suppose. Even if no one actually sees this thread, I had to make it. It's fleeting, and in that, is comfort I think.
Nolan Gutierrez
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Jack Moore
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Liam Miller
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Camden Perry
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Brody Bell
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Dominic Edwards
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Michael Sullivan
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Jacob Hughes
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Michael White
So what's Sup Forums listening to tonight?
Bentley Ross
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Landon Cruz
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Anthony Ward
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Blake Williams
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Thomas Robinson
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Jaxson Smith
hey i feel for you man. im sorry that happened
Lucas Brown
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Landon Martinez
Thanks user. I'm surprised to even get a reply. I hope your life goes well
Oliver Mitchell
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Isaiah Edwards
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Sebastian Watson
Pretty sure tonight is my last night. Anyone have recommendations for a good parting drink?
Easton Moore
I feel you op. Not really affected by a loss but just generally a fuck up at life. Going to start therapy tomorrow, but I'm wondering if it's even worth it. I don't enjoy anything anymore, everything and everyone pisses me off. I never asked for this shit...
Jonathan Wood
whiskey on the rocks? ionno. Don't kill yourself imo but drink some nice drinks, but if you are gonna kill yourself at least get a minimum 60 dollar bottle of whiskey beforehand. shits lit
Mason Ortiz
I'm sorry friend. I would like to say keep your chin up, things will get better. But I can't. I hope you try to stick it out though, for what it's worth.
Go to therapy. Can't give it quits without saying you tried right?
Alexander Cook
>I never asked for this shit... No, but you were handed virtually boundless options. It appears you have made some bad choices - you can get to choose again
Charles Nguyen
I'll give it a try. Thanks user.
Luis Martinez
Thanks friendo, I will try. I can't check out for as long as my family or at least my mom is around. Can't do that her, so I will just have suffer for a while longer. That's the one thing I can and must do even if it destroys me.
Ever get that feeling that you are a specie entirely of your own with only a vague idea of what it means to be human? Dunno, either my isolation is eroding my sanity or I have reached perfect self-reflection.
Michael Wilson
So I've decided on a good whiskey on the rocks. Any recommendation for a good ending song?
That listless feeling of isolation is depression user. If there is any chance of you getting better, please realize this. You can claw your way out of this hole eventually.
Ayden Hernandez
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Kevin Gonzalez
>you have made some bad choices
It might not even look like that to an outside observer. I never had trouble with the law, I have no debt, I haven't abused drugs to the point of it affecting my life. I just drifted trough life on my own, never commiting to anything and now I'm just an empty husk without achievements or goals.
Isaiah Lee
>never commiting to anything and now I'm just an empty husk without achievements or goals >you have made some bad choices I never mentioned drugs or the law.
Grayson Richardson
My dad is getting old. I'm not sure how I'll handle him passing.
Christian Gonzalez
I know, I just meant that I'm not fucked in a dramatic and obvious way.
I certainly have made some bad decisions out of fear and/or apathy.
Elijah Phillips
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Luis Williams
It hurts like a mother fucker. I hope you know how to compartmentalize your emotions, otherwise good chance you won't get up from the knockdown. >Took care of my terminally ill father for 6 years >Since I was 17. Almost 24 in may. Died 6 months ago. >thought I was prepared for it. Lots of time to prepare. >Massive stroke. Fucker still hung on for almost a week until he died of exhaustion. >Told him it was okay to pass. >Hate myself everyday since
Joseph Miller
It absolutely is, no question. It's just that I have felt more or less like this for as long as I can remember. Only difference is that I used to distract myself with video games from how awful and detached I felt. Guess I just can't imagine what it's like to be genuinely happy and in control of your fear, you know?
Tyler Rogers
>I certainly have made some bad decisions out of fear and/or apathy. So choose differently. If you don't like what you have, then you're the only one that can change it. But whining about your situation on Sup Forums will not change anything, if you get sympathetic responses the people responding don't know you and are not your friends and you're becoming tiresome now, so I'll wish you good day.
Parker Ward
>>Hate myself everyday since Why?
Michael Watson
I lied. Told him it was okay to leave. That I'll be okay. That maybe if there is some sort of after, we'll meet again. A friend of mine has this belief of reincarnation. I told it to him to make it easier. I lied user. I lied to my own dad
Julian Foster
I did not force you to respond or engage with me in any way. I am taking steps to get better, what I choose to in the meantime doesn't need to concern you one bit. But you call whining I call voicing my fears and worries to people who's judgement doesn't matter precisely because they don't know me and aren't my friends.
A good day to you too.
Jack Walker
I hope you actually get some help user. Distractions can only take you so far, but if you keep depending on them, this void you feel will only deepen.
And yeah, I understand your inability to imagine a better state. I've given up user. Don't be like me please.
Angel King
>Told him it was okay to leave It was OK for him to leave. It was obviously his time, and the actual decision was his (to a degree).
>That maybe if there is some sort of after, we'll meet again I don't believe there is but I have no proof.
Also, he would probably have realised that you were telling him things to help you deal with the situation, and he'd have been OK with that.
Brayden Russell
Seems like you are very much depressed yourself, you recognize that this feeling can be temporary and what steps need to be taken.
Yet you chose to do nothing. Are you being hyperbolic? Are you waiting for something? What do you want? Death?
Brayden Price
Truth dubs? In any which case, I don't believe in any sort of after, but I hope there is some sort of do over for people who deserve it. He was in pain most of his life.
>My exwife wasn't even there with me. >was highschool sweethearts. >Didn't come down when got the news he was passing. >Barely interacted with me at all >Both hate and love her still >Almost miss her as much as my father
Blake Sullivan
Just getting off Sup Forums for now to go for my morning run, so I'll keep it short. Just know that life gets better and you have the power to be happy. That's what your Dad would want. Life is a short little dance in the grand scheme of things, so all you really should do is follow your inner dreams and desires. Follow your intuition and your life purpose. If you don't have a purpose in life yet, keep looking. It'll be worth it. In the meantime, it's absolutely fine to be sad and depressed. Don't resist it. Embrace it. After you realize that it's just an emotion, you can choose to let go of it by not feeding it negative, depressing thoughts. Don't label the pain feelings you have as "bad". It's just a feeling of pressure somewhere in your body Just let it be, and don't resist it. You'll see what I mean when you realize that you actually have control over how you feel.
I know that life sucks right now, but if it helps, just know you're in my thoughts, and I'm sending positive wishes to you. Go do something good with your day and try to let go of the depressing thoughts. You have that power within you, even though it doesn't seem like it right now. Everything will be fine. Take care.
Xavier Foster
Yeah, perhaps I'm depressed. I can recognize that feelings can be temporary and what steps to take, but I can only keep moving for so long.
It isn't that I choose to do nothing user, It's that I desire the option with the lease amount of suffering I think. I don't think I'm waiting for something. Maybe I am. Maybe she'll come back. Maybe I'll die in my sleep. I want both equally.
I have nothing to say but simply thank you user. I mean it, I appreciate the notion, more than I can articulate. I hope your life goes well user, even though we'll never speak again. Perpendicular lines I suppose and all that shit.
Carter Adams
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Jacob Peterson
I guess I can understand that. That sounds painfully like me with only a few word rearranged here and there.
I'll give this therapy thing a shot and see where it takes me, maybe I get ahead of this thing yet. I hope you get whatever you need out of life user, whatever that maybe, and find some peace. Take care.
You made me emotional. I hope things get better for you user. I'll keep you in my mind. Good bye.
Nicholas Bell
Dude if that is true i am sorry. But on the other hand ..that is life.. we all will lose our parents and grandparents at some point. I know ..this will make it not easier..but ...i think you wrote something about you took care of him. I bet my ass your dad would have wished that you now start to live..really get a life.
Who knows what...maybe you should go be a fishermen and hunt these crabs in Alaska or be a mechanic in the australian outback...you can make up to 100k dollars in 2 to 3 months with these jobs and then travel the world for months till you get back there and make new money..and then buy a house etc
The last thing your dad would have wanted that you give up and spend your days on /b.
Fuck bitches in general. I am not saying mgtow is the answer but ..take care of yourself user.
Mason Carter
i bet he is glad to be away from you, you whiny cunt.
Alexander James
Ok and after reading the thread i just want to tell you this.
I grew up at my grandpa'sand when he died i felt completely empty and was depressed for years..i came slowly out of it when i realized that HE died and not me. It would have hurt him to see me like that because of him..that was the last thing on earth what he wanted and now i even feel like it was egoistic from me to let it break me. I used him to let my weak side grow more and more..and that is the whole fucking point of growin up..getting stronger and realizing that i can't throw my life away for no one..especially not when they are dead.
Get your shit together user..for him..forget that women..5years are nothing..i got friends who were left after 12years with 2 children and they also lost family members and you know what..they are more happy than both of us.
Now is your time man..don't throw it away..if you are not religios then pray to your dad and talk with him but use the rest of the day for yourself.
There is a whole planet full of possibilities break out of that box man..for yourself..for him..even for us lost souls here
Luke Smith
was listening to joyland and ghostland observatory earlier...
