Be me

>be me
>gayfag
>recently came out of the closet to my parents
>have guy friend
>pretty much only guy friend known for like all of childhood
>told him I was gay
>he said he was too
>had no idea
>start talking more about it and decide to move past friendship
>dating your best friend is great
>everything is good except few months in he asks me if I'd be interested in scat play
>fuck no
>says he respects that
>1 week later I start getting odd texts from him filled with poop jokes
>pretend to laugh
>they keep coming
>mfw it's not funny
>suddenly start getting pictures of shits he's taken texted to me
>he just sent me this one at work
>my phone is blowing up with pictures of his shit every
>parents want to meet him
>he's coming to dinner tomorrow
>what the fuck do I do
>pic related

Is your friend Andy Sixx? If yes, then you know what to do

start storing your shit in glass jars. when you've stockpiled enough of them pour it all into a wheelbarrow.
have him close his eyes.
push the fucker in the wheelbarrow.
We'll see how much he likes shit after that

no. here's a picture of him

whut? onision? u here bra?

HE LOOKS RETARDED

exactly what a dude that's into scat would look like, thank you for the chortle

holy shit bro. thats crazy. id just tell him straight up that youre uncomfortable with it. keep us updated.

Houston we have a problem
My sides appear to be in orbit

OP here.
he's currently in the same room as me.
asked if I saw the pics he sent me
sitting here making up shit so he doesn't notice I'm typing this

WHAT DO I DO

Bro you only have one option
Kill him and frame your parents

considering this option.
How should I do it?

How about you talk to him and tell him this must stop if he wants to continue the relationship?

anybody got a link to that anarchist cookbook thing? saw something about ricin in there

...

what the fuck he sent me like 42 pictures of his feces we're past the point of talking

Tell him to stop, if he doesn't break up. And if I was you I would break up after this because he looks like too much interested to stop so he need to find someone that likes that shit, literally.

those recipies suck dick,buy 25 i and kill him

those recipies suck dick,buy 25 i and kill him 25 hits will do it

"Stop sending me pictures of shit and shit related messages. I do not fucking like it. If you don't stop I'm gonna leave."

Dating a fag
Surprised that fags are mentally ill perverts
Pick one

innit, if you really like him, he deserves your honesty

yea exactly

its scary to say this sort of thing but like, honestly??? this should be what you say. please say it and keep us updated on this.

OP here. I just told him. He's freaking out and throwing stuff everywhere

stopped respecting after gayfag
sage

>inb4 he's Fats McGee

oh fuck... call the cops

week later I start getting odd texts from him filled with poop jokes
Screencaps

Pics of the chat or this is fake and gay kek

OP again.
He locked himself in my bathroom and is refusing to come out
parents are freaking out and asking if we should call the cops.

is it strange that i can smell the shit by looking at the picture?

He looks like Jim's younger, gay, retarded brother.

call the cops. 100% call the cops.

Tell him to come out of the bathroom, tell him that now is not the time for him to take pictures of his shit!

He's probably preparing shit to throw at you, that's why he locked himself in toilet ...beware

Well kek'd faggot

Praise kek

HES GONNA THROW SHIT AT YOU DUDE CALL THE COPS

cops are on their way. side note I hear lots of running water and he's not answering

HAHAHHA IKR

w aht the fuck dude knock the door down bc he could be drowning himself

ok water is coming out from underneath the door now and he's still not answering. cops are here.

Holy kek this cannot be real.

Very simple
Get your dads rat poison and put it in shitty's food at dinner
Leave the box under the sink and tell the cops your dad hates tags or something

Or you could tell the shitty that you respect that people have different fetishes but you are highly repulsed by scat and will never accept it
Then tell him you would appreciate if he never brings up shit again

Worst case scenario he breaks up with you, the long standing friendship comes to a grinding halt, and you won't have to worry about losing him anymore because it will have already happened

What a load off your ass that would be

Ultimately your greatest mistake was being a fucking queer

fake

What's it like to be so misogynistic that you deny women sex?

Dear God

This is great!! XD

Eh, tell him to find someone who shares his kink, and that it isn't you.

That's just messed up.

better luck next time.

FUCK OFF troll

do you call everything that gets posted here a troll?

Tell us when the fucking cops get here we wanna hear what happens

...

OP here just thought i'd share this

i don't fucking get it....pls explain to me

be careful dude... stay safe. i hope everything is okay. im really concerned bout this.

>only childhood guy friend
>supportive parents
>they have never met him before

OP is a lying faggot

cops are here. water everywhere and the bathroom window is open he's not in there.
they took my phone

kek

Please dear god tell me this is actually true.

Fake and gay just hoping this is true.

fuck this if he ever comes back I'm never talking to him again. this guy is clearly fucking crazy

cops just came out of the bathroom.
apparently he wrote "I LOVE YOU" with shit on my wall

OP REPLY BLEASE

fucking knew it

somebody needs to explain this to me please, I want to get the joke ;_; pls anons plsss

he wrote I love you with feces on my wall and left out the bathroom window. Water fucking everywhere. cops said they're going to look for him now. personally I don't care how long he's been my friend for this is fucked up I'm never talking to him again

PIC OR DIDN'T HAPPEN

pics faggot

yes

cops took my phone

Trips demand it

when I get my phone back I'll upload all the messages he was sending me

Lurk more fag

LIKE THERE IS NO OTHER WAYS TO TAKE PICS. ASK FOR YOUR PARENTS OR SOME SHIT FAGGOT

Dude, I really really hate faggots but the obvious answer to this is to make it stop if you don't like it.

Again, fuck you faggots.

thats what you get faggot. oh yea and AIDS

be a real queer and take a picture with a camera if you have no phone...and this is so fake...who the fuck would sit by his computer as some troll is writing i love you with shit on my wall

parents are into the whole anti-media thing they don't use phones

Tell him you're not comfortable with him sending you his shit and shit talk you fucking queer ass faggot

Sup Forums is basically a cesspool of unpredicted autism js

>then i lied on the internet

definitely not op. lmao

it was me

Theres a running joke on 4chin with Andy, the singer of Black Veil Brides, where people say they want to suck a log of shit out of his asshole.

But your parents aren't meeting him til tomorrow. You said so.

Naughty lying OP.

OH LORD

Why are you dating a mongoloid with a brain parasite?

thank you nice-kun

well I'm certainly not fucking now am I?

Pics or kys

OH HSHIT BOI

>gayfag

That is nothing to be proud of yourself, kill yourself.

???? how did they call the cops then???

pics or it didn't happen.

with my phone before the cops took it

post pics???

Each part of him is gorgeous, but as a whole, he's fucking hideous.

stop fucking around and post pics