Be me

>be me
>gayfag
>recently came out of the closet to my parents
>have guy friend
>pretty much only guy friend known for like all of childhood
>told him I was gay
>he said he was too
>had no idea
>start talking more about it and decide to move past friendship
>dating your best friend is great
>everything is good except few months in he asks me if I'd be interested in scat play
>fuck no
>says he respects that
>1 week later I start getting odd texts from him filled with poop jokes
>pretend to laugh
>they keep coming
>mfw it's not funny
>suddenly start getting pictures of shits he's taken texted to me
>he just sent me this one at work
>my phone is blowing up with pictures of his shit every
>parents want to meet him
>he's coming to dinner tomorrow
>what the fuck do I do
>pic related

Is your friend Andy Sixx? If yes, then you know what to do

start storing your shit in glass jars. when you've stockpiled enough of them pour it all into a wheelbarrow.
have him close his eyes.
push the fucker in the wheelbarrow.
We'll see how much he likes shit after that

no. here's a picture of him

whut? onision? u here bra?

HE LOOKS RETARDED

exactly what a dude that's into scat would look like, thank you for the chortle

holy shit bro. thats crazy. id just tell him straight up that youre uncomfortable with it. keep us updated.

Houston we have a problem
My sides appear to be in orbit

OP here.
he's currently in the same room as me.
asked if I saw the pics he sent me
sitting here making up shit so he doesn't notice I'm typing this

WHAT DO I DO