Casually shit in the jungle

>casually shit in the jungle
>t-rex comes out of nowhere
Your response

>Looks like we've got company!

continue shitting

flush

cant let rest of the group know I made a mess

I would try to throw my poo into his nose hole.

T-REX! T-REX! WE GOT T-REX HERE!

shoo him of course

Smash the t-rex with the tank cover, which would knock him out.

>not teleporting behind it and riding it

jungle has a designated toilet?

Stay still. Check mate you evolutionary cul de sac.

dont move because the t-rex cant see u if u dont move

I never understood why it attacked him even though he didn't move that much, yet let Grant and Lex live after she screamed and moved.

yes

This.

Get it stuck between some rocks and shoot it with tranq arrows until it passes out, then feed it scorpion kibble until it learns to obey me.

Because he was a coward and the bad guy.

>we're not supposed to like him because he's investigating what is clearly an understaffed, under built monster island after a worker just got fucking eaten.

The Lex and Grant thing I took as the T-Rex knowing something was there, but not what or where. It nudges the jeep to try and flush them out so it can see them.

There's one thing I'm certain of
Return
I will
To old
Brazil

>only ever asks legitimate questions and raises perfect reasonable concerns considering this is a gigantic monster island with Godzilla stuck behind merely a bit of wire.
>is supportive and optimistic when Hammond tries to assure him
>is reasonably terrified when the monsters break loose due to Hammond being a lying fuck and dies with no one caring about it.
>meanwhile Chaos man who has done nothing but shit all over everything just breaks a leg

>dies with no one caring about it.

Do they ever ask about or ever mention him again? That's really sad actually.

That game is horse shit

That book is gonna get all wet. :'(

...

>Your response

>I think I just shit myself!

stand up, turn around and bend over and hope for an emergency shitmehameha.

Plebs. None of you mentioned the 100 foot drop behind the fance. Thats bullshit

also no feathers on T-Rex come on

Top meme. Seriously, that's funny but a bit hard to read.

Why would a T-Rex even care about such tiny creatures anyways
why would it immediately hunt them down for no real reason?

even predators now don't do that really

>Finish shitting
>wipe
>put the paper on the bin like in any other first world country
>run

>pooey bins stinking up the washroom
why don't you just give up and use your hand runt

>idolize Malcolm

what?

HAHAHA HE'S SUCH A COWARD HE'S HIDING FROM A GENETIC ABOMINATION RESEMBLING AN ANCIENT BEHEMOTH THAT WOULDN'T BLINK BEFORE EATING A HUMAN WOW LMFAO HE DIED ON THE TOILET HAHA POOP JOKES WHAT A PUSSY I BET HE SHIT HIMSELF BECAUSE HE WAS ON THE TOILET YOU KNOW

Compliment him on being a big guy

>putting the shit paper in the trash
>not in the toilet

i know this is bait but damn

Childhood is when you idolize the Raptors

when I was a child I idolized the game warden

I still do

It isn't their fault some crazy scientists gave them life.

>Not again!

>SO. You're probably wondering how I got myself into this situation!

*Teleport on top of T-Rex's head while unsheathing katana*
"Heh, no wonder your kind went extinct"
*Slice head off*
"Nothing personnel, rexy"

>>put the paper on the bin like in any other first world country

this

That's another big question

why did he take his pants off???

I think he's wearing shorts, or

>when you gotta go, you gotta go.

...

>an ITALIAN lawyer

"Now this is auto-erotica!"

>take a shit so god damn stinky the t-rex can't smell me
>don't move so it can't see me

>*Record scratch*

Yep, that's me. You're probably wondering how I got into this mess. Well, first let's go back to the beginning...

>*VCR rewinding noise*

Rexy was more interested in eating the Jeep but saw the humans as appetizers

>Nothing personnel T.

This 100x always wondered that since I was little

The only correct response

Laughed way too hard at this

wipe my ass & throw the papers in the bin

...