Dark secret bread

dark secret bread

I masturbate in the dark

It's dark and it's a secret.

kek

I am friends with one black guy and dont tell anyone its dark and its a secret.

I'm 22 and i still eat my fucking boogers

I've been raped more than once

My fiancé is a registered sex offender

I know why kids love cinnamon toast crunch.

>me 18
>knocked up a girl 16
>fucked it up, got to marry her, cuz my parrents and shit
>never loved her
>after got child
>one year marriage past
>left her and baby girl
>moved to other city
>started new life there
>started small selling life insurance
>after 6 years got enough exp and money to begin my own company
>after just 3 years of work and some tricks shitting money
>started living fast life
>good cars, young whores, drugs, booze
>made a name of myself
>shit started moving from local
>spread my bussiness to other towns all around the state
>build a home
>expanded work
>now even more money
>living good for 7 more years
>job takes me to my home town
>i got to the neighbourhood to see how my ex was dooing
>still in her parrents home
>parked the car and waited curiously
>saw her once with some nice hot looking girl
>guess thats my grown up daughter
>started seeing and noticing her around town more and more often
>especially in night clubs
>the word in town spread about me so golddiggers started hitting on me
>among them my own daughter started giving me the looks one night not knowing shit
>she did a good job getting more and more closer to me
>even tho i knew somehow it made the whole thing exciting for me
>i rolled with the whole game
>started taking her to clubs myself
>dinners too, from an escort girl i usually always have on me, she got to the point of almost dating with me
>things got hotter and hotter between us so fast
>i didnt stop for any fucking reason at all, i did not know what i was thinking
>i ended up sleeping with her several times before i left the town
>didnt tell her anything
>she also didnt mention me to her mother
>cuz i was her suggar daddy.....litterally

You should tell her on your deathbed.

why and how could i

I know the secret to the shitty new captcha so I don't have to click on 12 shitty squares.

i have HSV2 and decided that I dont give a fuck. basically training myself to forget about it. No outbreaks ever.

It's hot. Send a letter with your picture. Tell her you never stop thinking about her, but don't tell her you know she's your daughter so you're not the bad guy to her.

copypasta story has been in these threads for a while don't fall for the bait.

gril or faggot?

this doesn't happen in real life, and most certainly not to people posting on Sup Forums

are u me

a

I really want to try and have sex with a man, just to try. Even though im 100% sure ill end up with a female...

I wish I was a girl

I'm in love with a 12 year old girl

Me too user. Not some shitty male-to-female stuff either, I wish I was born a girl. Oh well, what can you do, right?

I know I will die as virgin bcause of social anxiety and no social skills.

I've had nudes of mine posted online without my consent before and ended up getting blackmailed into sending more. It was humiliating and I kind of loved it, and have reposted them on here and other sites from time to time.

i have a penis/i'm trans.

same, i've even had a few chances....

Well... there's just HRT, we can't come around

do it man. who gives a fuck, as the kids say YOLO

more of this feeling

same anons but i don't want to be trans, i don't want to do the hormones or have the scars or do the explaining. i just want to be different but since they're no magic genies, im stuck.

>My fiancé is a registered sex offender
Continue?

I seriously just farted like 15 seconds ago. I almost kinda shit myself. Almost.

What did they do

Why would you use kek instead of lol? Think about it. It doesn't mean anything, its just the modification of the actual acronym lol. You don't even know why you use it. Somewhere, sometime you saw a few people post it and hopped right on board. Too mainstream for lol right? Thats so old, its meaning makes sense but you don’t feel comfortable expressing your approval of things on the internet with the common old "lol" thats been around for so long. You'll man up and use the purposely misspelled version with no discernible humor or purpose besides making you look like a complete idiot while you maintain the false concept that other people find it amusing or appropriate and using purposely misspelled words shows the world that you’re not afraid of anything and are part of some grand inside joke that no one finds funny. Theres a lot going through your head, but you realize that I’m right. You will try though, to get the best of this exchange. What are you going to go for? Newfag? Summer? Oh damn, there are so many options to choose from. An implication that I'm underage perhaps? That’s always fresh. Maybe you'll just shut down. I think you should go with something about “butthurt” or being mad or even comment on the length of the unproportionally long comment that so swiftly brought to your attention that you are a faggot that tries oh so hard to fit in. Careful though, is this even “OC”? Tsk tsk. Hard to say, don’t want to get embarrassed user. I'm sure you could find some grammar or spelling errors as a last resort. I cant wait, Its always fun playing insult roulette. Fucking idiot!

I think I have aids.

It's actually a religious phrase from a small quasipolitical cult I'm in soooo

I wouldn't know how to find someone tbh

You really think it will go away? Better start hormones as soon as possible rather than be a hon.

This is precisely how I feel user. I dont want to get some shitty fake vagina, i dont want plastic tits, I dont want any of that. I just wish there was a magic button you could press that restarts you over as a girl. Until that happens I'll just stick with being male, so basically forever. Here's hoping I'm female in my next life.

Autist women have a fourth hole located behind their left kneecap.

I'm a 23yo virgin

no i know it won't go away, i just know i can't live as trans, im just not strong enough. i actually did the year of therapy to get the hormones and surgery and backed out at the last minute. this user summed up the rest.

Not a secret, more a vent

I have a friend that's 5'5" 200lbs and girls are all over him, he ain't even rich and lives with his parents

What am i doing wrong?

33

The cake is a lie.

I got six kids suspended by saying I was bullied by them.
>be me
>be in fifth grade
>I wondered back then what Gatorade tasted like
>I was a poorfag so I decided to steal some
>one day I got my chance
>there was one table of dickbags who were talking
>I looked over to see what they were doing
>I saw a blue colored Gatorade
>oh sweet Loki, I've got to know the taste
>lean in slowly and untwist the cap
>take a big sip
>it tastes like a smurf's shit
>one of them turns and looks at me
>oh fuck.jpg
>they tell on me, and I just start crying
>I go down to the principal's to fridge, where I make up a bullshit story about the douche table bullying me
>they actually fucking believe it
>after school, I went home and drank the sweet ambrosia known as apple juice.
That day, I got six innocent kids suspended, and I learned to not drink Gatorade. It was really fucking terrible.

is he funny or charismatic? is he know for having a big dick? are you know for the opposite?

thats you dark secret? fuck off faggot.

Trying to figure out where to buy ghb because my wife never puts out. If I could be 100% sure it wasn't cut with anything terrible I'm sure I would do it.

I jerked off to some related sisters ice bath challenge video on YouTube

he's hilarious, ill give him that

Dunno about his dick. We were at the bar the other day and he picked up a petite blonde with perky tits and a great ass... fucking jealous

Uhh I don't wanna start a debate here, but surgeries are far from being shitty (at least if you don't go to a shitty tier country/surgeon), and hormones gives you real tits, you don't need implants lol.

Have you ever seen a REAL transgirl who transitioned before their ~30s?

that'll do it, making a girl laugh is almost like making her cum. even if you're ugly. i'd say work on your social skills but i can't help you there, that's my problem, i don't look bad but can't talk for shit.

I'm sorry that happened to you.

i pour the milk first when i make cereal

how old are you, and whats her relationship to you.. something similiar w a 15yo, im 25.

I eat my cereals dry

well it's also family and friends. even if they act accepting, i'd still feel wrong. im glad for the people it works for but it's just not for me unfortunately.

you fuckin madman

Same here. You're not alone. It's tough

link?

got a job as a joke just to see if i can

I voted for Hillary

tinder or other gay dating sites, i'd say bars and look for the gay looking guy but theres alot of metrosexuals now adays.

I laid down on the floor because I'm an absolute madman

No debate needed, it's just my personal opinion. I have seen some very convincing post-op girls, but I'm not trying to say that I wouldn't do it just because it's unconvincing, I don't want to do it because it's not something that is a main focal point in my life. For a lot of trans people, not being a female is a big point of contention in their life to the point where some of them quite literally feel like they can't even function properly with their own body. They get the operation and therapy done because it finally makes them feel "normal". I don't struggle with that. I WANT to be a female, but at the same time it doesn't bother me immensely that I'm male. For me, being a male is "eh" in the sense that I'm okay with it, but I think I'd enjoy being a female better. But not so much that I'm willing to drastically alter my entire life. Similarly, I'm really not built well at all to be a "cute" girl like I'd want to be. My body's shape is rather "masculine" if you will, and I'd just end up looking like a shitty crossdresser if anything.

My main point is that I wish I was born a girl. With real boobs, real vagina, real woman thoughts, etc etc etc. Unless I can get that, I'm staying the same.

I know that feel like that exact feel considered operations but its not the same

FUCKING

L
I
A
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pretty well said user. i agree completely as well

Don't be hating on our religious beliefs brah

>be 14
>early bloomer, filled out for a 14 year old
>One of the best athletes from freshman and sophmore
>female cousin, 13
>Petitie girl, tight ass, B cups
>We are very close, families see each other a lot
>Her and her brother are sleeping over one weekend
>Day goes by
>I'm in bathroom, about to shower
>Forget to lock door
>Just in Boxers atm
>Intent to jerk in shower like always
>start tugging dick through boxers.
>Get a Semi
>very tight breifs.. noticable
>about to take off boxers and hop in
>Cousin walks in
>Me: "GTFO""
>Cousin "Omg ...I'm sorry"
>she's stood there for a few seconds secs.. in some sort of shock
>Shes just staring at me, see her eyes look at my breifs.. she can see the semi
>I start to get a little harder
>she snaps out of it
>"Sorry, Sorry"
>She leaves
>Fap in shower


>She snaps out of it
>"OMG i'm so sorry user"
>leaves bathroom

Neighbors had a dog. All it did was bark day and night. Day and night. BARK BARK BARK BARK! I asked them nicely if they wouldn't mind trying to keep the dog quiet, at least at night. Told me to fuck off and mind my own business. BARK BARK BARK BARK! Called the cops. Nothing fucking happened. After damn near a year, I got sick of it. They leave in the back yard. Opened up the gate, gave a little whistle and the stupid cocksucker hopped right in my car. I was just going to drop it off in the country somewhere. But it started barking... BARK BARK BARK BARK! Grabbed the tire iron out of my trunk and beat the fucking thing's skull in.

I get off to the thought of me torturing my crush, her parents finding her barley alive, and then they take her to hospital but she dies from her injuries a couple days later. The thought of her mom holding her as she takes her last breath makes me diamonds.

I want to judge you, but I shot a neighbors rooster for the exact same thing, so I really can't. Constant stimulus can just make something snap one day.

did you just have a stroke at the end? she just looked and left?

i won't judge you just don't have children. the crying can do the same.

LOL, best story in a while.

jej

Nah, it's not the same at all. I have a daughter who's now 6, and I never lost it on her. The difference, I think, is that for most kids there's something that can be done about the crying. They need to be changed, or fed, or burped, or want to be held, and there's a modicum of control there. Sometimes nothing seemed to work, but that's when it's nice to have a wife and you can take turns.

In fact, and it's funny you brought it up, the rooster was part of the problem. Fucking thing would always wake my daughter and wife up, and my daughter would just be upset at being awake. It also didn't help that I had filed multiple noise complaints because they would also leave a stereo out on the back porch with salsa blaring into the late evening, well past 10.

I shot that radio too, while I was at it.

i'll add on to that to share my dark secret.
>be me about 8 years ago (14)
>sister (19 legal age to move the fuck out) has kid but still living at home with us
>kid cries day and night next to my thin walled room
>sleep deprivation kicks in
>start having fucked up thoughts to end the crying
long story short got put into a mental institution for a while and now know i could never handle kids.

i have a weird fetish of cumin on women's clothes
one of my housemates (3 girls) store a bunch of clothes in a box and put it in the storage room
i stole all her skirts and bra to masturbate and filled those sexy black skirts with my white cum
i'll return it back after i washed it, not anytime soon tho, gotta have my fun first

nah bro, if that kid was crying day and night, your sister was doing something wrong. At considering she was a single mom (guess, because she was living with you) at 19, the odds are good that she didn't know how to care for that child very well.

Sorry that happened to you, that's a fucked situation to be in.

>salsa
>roosters
Mexican neighbors? I had that problem once

you got it. was living in Garden Grove at the time. Fucking hated them.

>Garden Grove

Well I'll be fucked user, that's where I currently reside. What a coincidence.

yeah she was single mother and doing drugs at the time. thanks for the sympathy thought, really. My family and all the therapist always made me feel like the only fucked up one but sleep deprivation at a young age does shit man...

Whilst driving my car I once knocked a youg girl off her bicycle
>I'm guessing 13-14 and real cute
>I stopped to and ran over to her lieing in the ditch
>Her skirt up around her waist, cute panties
>She was unconcious but seemed otherwise alright
>Before I ran to a house nearby I could't resist copping a feel
>Real nice puffy pussy, I fingered her for like a minutte and she started to get wet
>When she starte moaning obviously waking up I quickly put her panties back in place and ran over to get help
>Mother fucking what when we came back she was sitting up and no worse off quite happy but a bit shaken
>I fingered a girl and she never knew

I could've murdered my rich grandfather and successfully made it look like an accident

sucked dick when I was about 6 - 10. 6 year old me was taught how to masturbate by a friend then we started fooling around. This progressed to me convincing a friend of mine to suck each others dicks. Do this for a few years. Got caught around age 10 by my friends parent in his bed naked It all clicked. Realized how it was wrong and stopped forever. Now with wife and kids and a normal life. Haven't told no one. Same kids still live on the old block to this day,

I sometimes lurk these threads to see if there will finally not be some shit secrets and 90 percent of the time its the same stupid jokes,a bunch of pedo shit, a bunch of gay shit, and people sharing things the wish they could do in real life.
>Also I'm responsible for more than 40,000 dollars of stolen Best Buy merchandise from when I used to work in shipping and receiving.

that is rather strange. I lived off of Newland, between Trask and Westminster Ave, if you know where that is.

I try to cheer everyone up. I tell them life had meaning an purpose and everything will be OK, but really I don't think anything really matters. I think we live, it's all pointless and meaningless, then we die and cease to exist. I just try to save others from the pain that it's all empty.

I was hooking up with this chick from a crazy religious family for a while after high school and got her pregnant after the condom broke. She initially refused to even consider abortion but ended up changing her tune after I threatened to send her nudes to her family, her friends, her work and people she went to university with. I did pay for the procedure but I refused to go with her for it.

22 years old

Kissless/hugless virgin.

Only times I've touched a girl I'm not related to were accidentally rubbing up on them, or handshakes.

i fuck a close friend of mine pretty often, but shes fat and kinda ugly. im too much of a shyfag to find someone else

My new neighbor has a 17 year old daughter that strips for me at night. I get to watch her undress because she waits for me to go to bed to put on the show. I told her as soon as she turns 18 she can move in with me. Her mom is religious nutbag who will lose her shit, but I'm going to enjoy her meltdown.

i do that too user, for instance my mom's really religious and when i was young i would shit on it and say all these things trying to disprove it but now i realize it makes her happy and thats all that matters. not to sound edgy but i've found alot of darkness in the world and i like hiding that from people so they can be at peace. it's really exhausting thought, trying to be positive all the time.

Not only is it empty, it's rigged by people who are more organized and intent on rubbing their dick in your face as they sink in a nothing by net shot from half court.
>Life's a game and you got put in with 6 seconds on the clock down by 115.

i have to pretend i have a personality to make up for the fact my grandmother wouldnt let me do anything out going because id be like my drug addict mom