How to get Best New Music in 2017 as a white male

1. write an album about death

2. be gay, bi, or trans

3. be ethnically ambiguous

4. don't be a citizen of the Anglosphere

5. be hardcore liberal

ok but did you actually listen to the album

HES A FUCKING WHITE MALE

Good thing I don't make music for Pitchfork's approval.

In fact, if I made an album and Pitchfork gave it a low score, I would consider that the ultimate testament to the quality of my music.

Yes, right when it leaked.

White people just suck at making music in 2016+1

you're stretching

no desu

is hip hop thriving? what do you like about hip hop and r&b?

>tfw all that's popular with normies now is mumblerap, trap, douchey LE PLURRR EDM crap and whiney nasal rap

I want to die.

Normies have always had a terrible taste in music. Are you seriously just having this revelation now?

God it feels so nice not being reliant on p4k reviews

damn I hate modern pitchfork now that it barely panders to my demographic so let me go ahead and continuously advertise modern pitchfork's views instead of finding another music journalism site

I'm definitely not retarded btw just a disgruntled patrician!!

>In fact, if I made an album and Pitchfork gave it a low score, I would consider that the ultimate testament to the quality of my music.
And then your entire music career would be dead before it even started.

dude white genocide

The most successful and popular music artists on the planet Pitchfork doesn't even bother to review.
I'm pretty sure I'll be OK if they don't like me.

yeah just like U2, Coldplay, The Mars Volta

Poor examples. They were famous before Pitchfork was influential. These days if some indie musician releases an album and Pitchfork slams it, their career is over.

they gave gambino's camp a 1.6, mumford & sons a 2.1, mac miller a 1.0

>laura snapes
never fuck with HER or ANY female writer

operative phrase is "these days"
5 years is a decade in Indie Years

you're shifting these goal posts faster than I can score now

here lemme put them back

Kek'd
You're trying way too hard man, you're anonymous, you can just walk away at any time

>implying i'd be trying to make in le indeh scene

These pitchfork whining threads are getting old

If you hate them so much stop visiting the website already

...

you had me all the way up to number 4 and then promptly lost me at 5. what a shame. where this dude from anyway

Uhm Mount Eerie got BNA and he's white as fuck and sad as fuck

I love how almost every review of No Shape has to throw in that political aspect. That "fuck Trump", "we're living in troubled times", "it's still horrible to be gay and in public" angle, implying the common group-think mentality that that's the way things are and if you don't think so you aren't a part of us. To me it's frustrating hearing this whining. Album's nice, but he peaked at Too Bright.

Huh, I liked the album quite a bit on first listen, but that Pitchfork review has actually managed to put me off it

Well that's fucking stupid.

It took me like 5 or 6 listens to be able to like it. I really wish it was just more of him and the piano though.

>not knowing bait
>not reading the OP

examples please

Alternatively:
1. Write an album about forests (even though nothing about it except the cover art actually has to do with forests)

2. be straight (?)

3. be German

4. call yourself Gas while being German and using Wagner samples in your music

5. make apolitical music

p4k also sucks the dick of people that are already grandfathered into what they consider "popular music canon"

Is anyone else getting sick of the Anti-SJW, us vs them mentality of Sup Forums lately? It's all over the place, even on fucking Sup Forums of all places.

>>>r/marxism/

I don't know what that is

>lately
This has been happening since the term "feminazi" became a thing, dude.

I've been coming to Sup Forums since a shit ton of years now. And I've always thought the same thing:
Stop jerking off too much, guys, it hurts your dick.

link, anyone?

It's not only a chan thing, there was always a Us vs them thing, it has just exploded lately with the bigger access to internet and the easy channels that exist to express their opinions, I thought Anti-SJW youtube channels where fucking funny when they began, but now it's just... repeating themes and ... I don't know it has such a negative atmosphere for the community. P4k doesn't make it easy, laura snapes sucks a lot and her reviews are totally biased.

nice meme

He's German. Read rule 4 of the OP.

muh reverse racism

pretty much.

P4k is a political agenda. They just somewhat arbitrarily attach music to fit it..

>Mike Hadreas’ fourth record is pure decadence. It’s his most realized album yet, a tender and transcendental protest record of love and devotion