I need a feels thread

I need a feels thread

Post your feels

Im alone tonight trying to lose weight

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My mom kicked me out of the house when i was 16 and I had to move into an older friends place and get my ged because i had no way to go to school where he lived she ended up killing our family dogs two of them and our cat. She dissapeared a few months later and i got in contact with my dad and little bro moved to the other side of the country havent seen her since or heard from her

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Holy fuck

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I struggle to make any friends because Asperger's syndrome (can't take a joke at all) I'm socially awkward and have anxiety, and on top of that am depressed. I'll probably end my life sooner or later, as I don't see things getting better from here.

Self loathing is a norm for me

GF broke up with me today, nothing special really, but she's the first person I've ever truly loved so I'm not really taking the breakup well.

I have a long post, and I'd like it if anyone read it. Maybe you don't have advice for me, and that's OK. It doesn't really matter. I just need someone to acknowledge my feelings.

I'm having a lot of girl problems right now. I feel extremely alone all the time, mostly because I'm still reeling from the end of a 6 year relationship. It's been 2 years, but it still affects me daily. I don't think I will ever get to a place where I am at peace with what happened. It kills me to this day. I need something to make the pain go away.

I'm sort of seeing one girl. We've hung out a few times and made out. It's weird though, she's not good at communication, and I'm really unsure how to handle things. We've never really gone out on a date, and when I texted her to ask if she wanted to go out sometime she never responded. It doesn't help that I have a lot of anxiety, so I'm getting paranoid if I'm doing something wrong. I haven’t messaged her recently, because I feel like I’ve been doing everything and she hasn’t reached out to me.

Cont.

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I feel hungry but also tired, and regret that I messed up my sleep cycle just as I was getting it on track.

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This sounds exactly like the relationship I was just in before my gf broke up with me today. I know how you feel bro.. the anxiety, the paranoia of maybe doing something wrong... I just went through that shit man.

I know how you feel user i cant really tell you what to do. but i can tell you what not to do
>don't try to shut off your emotions from the world
>Dont resist change
>dont try to fix something you cant fix

I've also been getting involved with a married woman my age. I've known her for a bit, we get along pretty well. The past few times I've seen her there's been some definite sexual tension. We've made out before, but it was a night we were both drinking. Twice this past week when we hung out we ended up holding hands, and talking about our issues with anxiety and BPD. I don't talk about that with anyone, and finding out that she deals with the same stuff was a huge turn on. It's so comforting knowing that she understands what I deal with. She said that she wanted to get lunch sometime and talk about it, but I haven't reached out to her about when that's going to happen. I don't want to overstep my bounds, but from what I have gathered, she's in an open relationship anyway. I know it's fucked up to get involved with someone married, and she's told me that she "knew it wouldn't last" anyway, but I don't care. I need someone. I need someone to hold my hand and tell me I'm not terrible.

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I have jury duty tomorrow and I haven't been out of the house in over 2 years.

I was molested by my brother on and off from ages 5-13/14. as well as by some neighbor kids, and my step-sister (but I enjoyed that, probably because I was 11 or 12 and was extremely homophobic) no I only masturbate to shota and twink porn, however I only feel a strong attraction to some females. I'm afraid of becoming a danger to my brothers' children.

Cont

The other girl is a longtime friend of mine. We've smoked a lot of weed and done other shit together. We've gotten to know each other really well. She knew me when I was with my ex of 6 years, and she was married at the time. Recently, she was with a guy for a few months and then she got pregnant. She was really excited. Then she miscarried and dumped the guy because he was a leech. I got really worried about her, this past week when I was drunk I messaged her and said that I would do everything I could for her, and if she wanted to move here, I'd take care of her. I'm not sure why I did that. I guess I have feelings for her. In the past, we've talked about stuff that friends shouldn't really talk about, mostly sexual things. She told me once that she could make me cum really hard, and it would be the best I've ever had. It was mostly light-hearted, but I believe when people say things like that it's at least partially serious. I would really like to be with her, and I know she cares deeply about me. But am I just projecting my loneliness onto her? I was stupid to message her the other day saying what I said. She probably got really weirded out. I want to message her again to make sure that she is OK, but I don't feel like I can do it again without seeming needy. I am needy right now, but I don't want to look that way. It's not a good look. No one wants someone who’s needy. I don't even know for sure she's interested, but I want to try it anyway, because I need someone. If I try it though, and she rejects me, how can I expect her to be friends with me? Who wants that shit?

Do you have niceish cloths

Feels:
I'M SO FUCKING SICK OF PEOPLE POSTING /S/ PICS IN Sup Forums AND NOT /S/ WHERE THEY FUCKING BELONG.

Last one

Like I said, all of this is coming from this hole in my heart from my long-time ex. I’m still not over it. I’ll never be over it. I need someone. I want to be with someone. I’ve had one relationship since she left, and that girl broke up with me without really giving a reason why. She kept saying I was the perfect boyfriend, but she “had to work on herself”. I have thought about that a lot, and taken it to mean that she just didn’t see herself being with me or that she thought I was still dealing with my long-term ex and not ready for a commitment. Maybe that’s true. I don’t miss my ex, quite the opposite really. I miss being in a committed relationship. I want to give myself entirely to another person. I miss sleeping next to someone every night. I miss holding hands in the grocery story. I want to cuddle after work every day. It was all taken from me. I am desperate for it again. I think that’s why I’m trying to get involved with these other girls. I have to put myself out there, even though it kills me. The anxiety of the unknown is so painful. But there can be no relationship with anyone unless I put my heart on the line. That scares me, and motivates me. It’s a horrible idea to try and get with any of these girls, really. But I don’t know what else to do. I need someone so badly. I am so painfully alone. I am trying not to hurt myself, or kill myself, or anything. I just can't handle being alone anymore.

>I need someone. I need someone to hold my hand and tell me I'm not terrible.

Fuck man this is exactly why I got into this relationship

i acknowledge you. you are not terrible. you sound self-aware enough that therapy might really help you out.

Seek professional help. Talk to a therapist. The only way you're going to stop yourself from doing something to another kid is if you have someone to help you. You're not a bad person if you don't act on those impulses.

Seriously, find someone.

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Old clothes from private school

Been going to therapy. My therapist has helped me get some of these feelings out. I don't feel as suicidal, and I haven't cut in a while, but the pain still lingers. It's not really that it hasn't helped, but there are things that therapy can't fix. It can't fix the need to be with someone. It's going to be there. When I find the right person, I'm probably going to love them with every ounce of my being until I breathe my last. I will probably scare them off because of the intensity before that happens anyway.

you can't force a long-term relationship, they come to you. you need to figure out how to be happy alone first, dude. if you can't love yourself, how're you gonna love somebody else?

why don't you try... not... scaring them off instead

I FEEL EXACTLY LIKE THIS

how old are you

>you need to figure out how to be happy alone first

I've thought about that for a long time. Many of my close friends have said those words to me since the breakup. I just don't believe it. I can't be happy when there's this pain. I've tried to be happy alone for more than 2 years, and I can't. The only times I've felt really happy was when I with someone. I haven't been completely alone since then. I've had a few one night stands, and other things, and when I've fallen asleep with someone are the only times I've really felt at peace.

Realizing you cant force someone to love you is the hardest thing Ive ever experienced. I try to convince her to love me every day. I beg her to love me. I want to be enough for her, but she invites her friends to come along. She will never love me, and I dont think I can live with that

I don't have advice but I acknowledge you user

Yea thats what im afraid of that i'll love her but she won't love me back...

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19, one of my brother already has kids

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I am popular at campus, but everyone forgets about me as soon as the weekend starts. If I am not going out to drink with people, I will barely receive any messages. This is heaven compared to Highschool, I used to sit by myself during lunch every single day, but it still annoys me how I sometimes feel invisble or alienated from my peers.

I can pretend to be tough, I haven't spilled my spaggheti in years but it keeps getting more and more difficult to pretend I am just like them.

I live with my aunt and uncle. My parents and my brother came to visit me this weekend and they left this morning. I woke up and the other half of my bed was empty. My brother was gone. And my parents. And all of their luggage. I didnt get to say goodbye. It was like they were never there to begin with, and my life returned to its typical feeling of loneliness.

So tell me Sup Forums, do you ever look back at something happy and just think to yourself whether it ever even happened?

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hey user I'm going through the same exact thing.

feels fucking awful man.

My girlfriend is leaving me because she's finally taking her childhood rapist to court and she is having a rough time and can't be in a relationship right now. I understand that she needs space, but I don't think she realizes how she's the only thing holding me together, and that without her, I can't function properly. I love her too much to let her go. But now she won't answer me..

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I know that feeling. You have friends but you dont have real friends. You are only alone because you always have to invite yourself to parties and you have gotten so tired of it that you think "fine! I can just survive by myself. I dont need them." But in reality you go home every night and wait for your phone to go off, and even though you know nobody will call or text, you jump at every vibrate of your phone, hoping that someone will invite you somewhere. The only reason you have a phone is so that someone might decide to text you. You live every day hearing about other's plans and how great their weekend was and all you want, just one fucking time, is to feel included.

So fucking true.

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What a weird reason to leave you.

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>spilled my spaggheti

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I went to a funeral I was not invited to. It was my grandma's best friend, she's old and can't get out of the house right now so she kindly asked me to go in her place.
Nothing out of the ordinary. As I walked out of church I got stopped by another lady "I used to talk to her a lot in her last days, she'd been struggling with depression..." she keeps going on and on until she drops it. " she asked me 'do you think God would be angry if I killed myself, I've thought about leaving the stove on overnight' and I told her it was wrong"

What kind of God does that to people who follow him? Makes me want to an hero before I get old.

WELL her issue is that she's just going through a really shitty time in life in general and that she needs some space and she wants a break. She promises me she will come back to me, but neither of us know how long it is, and it's really tough on me

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It's the first mothers day since my mother passed in may last year. I miss my mum :(

I can relate. My girlfriend left me like 3 hours ago. She doesn't know how fucking dependant I am on her, not just as a partner but as a best friend too.

My best friends dropped me a few months before I met her. Now that she's gone I have absolutely nobody left and I'm back on Sup Forums for the first time in 5 years. I don't know what to fucking do, I feel lost.

Part of me thinks she'll come back. I feel like she was really upset by the breakup and it wasn't just a "I don't love you anymore lol" thing. I've been dumped by girls who clearly just didn't love me anymore so I didn't care at all.

I hope she comes back. She was the only light in my life when everyone else has brought me nothing but darkness.

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What's happening in this thread?

If she's going through a tough time, why push you away? I would imagine she'd want to do the opposite and have you there for her.

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She won't let me help, believe me I've tried.

Feels.

I fucking love my mom dude. I don't know what I would do without her. I can't imagine losing her and it's going to fucking tear me apart when it happens.

I'm sorry user, from the bottom of my heart. I hope things start looking up for you and you spend mother's day being with your family and being happy like she would've wanted it. make sure you visit her, too.

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I've actually been considering suicide a lot more than a normal human should. The funny part is that I don't have a reason really. It just facsinates me, and I feel like I'd rather off myself then continue going through life recently.

Recently I just haven't been feeling anything. My girlfriend left me, I'm broke as hell, have no friends, have no car, etc. I've just been numb to the world around me and I'm starting to lose faith in it

I wish I could help you man. I don't know much about relationships.

Oh okay I can do that. Is this good? Nick tells me I'm a good actress

mom is wasting away to liver disease, she's the caring and supportive type, dad passed away when i was 12, even while sick she still helps me when i'm in financial trouble, i'm an uneducated minimum wage faggot and I can't help her even if i wanted to, barely making ends meet for my family, been in a deep depression for more than 2 years now.

source?

im autistic to talk to her and this is the last year i will see her,this is my third time having a crush on her but fuck it man i keep telling myself to move on which i do but always fail

also im ashamed of my dick size because it is a solid 6 inches if not slightly above if im fully erected and horny

oh well fuck it, hope you guys have a great day wish me luck b

Up late 2 AM cramming for an A&P test again, never can seem to stop procrastinating. I hate all the stress I put on myself but I don't know why I keep doing it. I'm doing it right now, this post is me procrastinating.

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>9gag

lost

I don't think I can be helped in this situation anyway, I just have to sit back and let life take the wheel, maybe she'll come around and be ready for help after they sentence the guy. I'm just worried because she's talked suicide a few times, but has never done anything like this, so I really hope she's not planning on doing anything of that matter; I wouldn't know anyway.. she won't answer me. She's not dead yet though, she posts on her Snapchat periodically.

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I remembered that happening once, shit is rough the first few weeks or even months. Hope ya feel better dude.

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Wow you got it lucky 4 inches here and fat isn't that wonderful huh. I wish I were you

hang in there man, A&P sucks but it is worth it in the end. What are you going for? Nursing? MD? DO?

I got this problem but I'm not as smart as you. Just study and forget about everything else, same way you forget about studying when you procrastinate. I read something like: "make your procrastination work for you" i.e. procrastinate on things that waste your time. "I can watch tv later" or "I can get drunk later" or whatever.

Story Time
>Be me 15 y/o 10th grade winter break
>Meet up with friend who switched schools in 9th
>qt 3.14 who at the time was the only person I could talk to
>We have been texting and gone on meet ups before
>Go to the mall, see a movie, have a good time
>For once I'm not awkward and enjoy myself
>Feel like a person with her
>Almost 6 hour long date ends, we are waiting for her mom to pick us up
>She goes to touch my hair or something
>I never told anyone but I was molested by my 'friend' in middle and ever since I never let anyone touch me
>Give her the cold shoulder on the car ride back
>Realize the next morning what I've done
>Try to apologize but only come off as Autistic
>Mess up every text after and eventually stop bothering her

I still miss her. I miss the idea of her. A stable person who actually cares about you. I want to fucking hang myself. I torments me everyday.

I'll probably be alone. even after the Navy. fuck the confidence meme

Woah, if she might kill herself you better get involved.

I wish I could get involved, I've tried visiting her house, she won't answer, calling her, she won't answer, text, Snapchat, instagram, facebook, whatever, she won't answer. I don't think she will actually do it. And I doubt that's why she wants to be alone. She hasn't talked suicide for he pst few years and last time she did talk about it she told me that no matter how she gets, she'd never actually do it. I just need to wait for her to come back to me

Eventually nursing. I'm starting off becoming an EMT, I think I'll really enjoy the fast-paced field for awhile. There's a Paramedic-RN bridge that I want to do later on (if I can get myself under control.)

Jesus Christ Lewis musta had some demons.