Le why no gods complaint

>le why no gods complaint

Any actual criticism on this masterpiece?

No black character.

>war famously lasted for ten years, movie has it happen over a weekend
>Paris was killed and Helen returned to Menelaus; movie has Paris and Helen running off
>Agamemmon kills Piram

WE WUZ GAWDS N SHEIT

Brad Pitt can't act for shit. He coasts on his looks.

Greeks are brown and 5ft 5" goblins

Did all the white people leave after the ancient times?

>Menelaos killed
>Agamemnon killed

pile of horseshit

Watch Snatch, Burn After Reading, or Twelve Monkeys. He fucking shines as a character actor. If anything his looks hold him back and relegate him to higher paying, but more wooden and generic roles.

It's completely historically inaccurate.

>""""history""""

He still knows he's good looking, and it shows through his acting.

Go to bed Schliemann.

Nah he can be decent (12 Monkeys) but he needs an exceptional director.

Here he was supposed to be this larger than life hero but then to make him "relatable" they gave him humanity and feelings and gentlemanly conduct and humility and regret and all that other bullshit.

Not to mention a wonky British accent that Pitt can't pull off to save his life.

>You sack of wine!

>Make a movie from atlantis
>It's historically inaccurate guyz

>le greeks are le bad guys

This was the last excuse for Brad to wear a wig and be all sexy

Now he's just fat old and divorced

But only in starring roles as typical protags. He legitimately has fun with off the wall parts that one wouldn't expect him to play, and that also shows through his much better acting in those roles.

I was forced to watch a movie with the leading role given to an inferior Greek hero.
Heracles would've sacked Troy in a day

>Make a movie from atlantis
wat

Were we supposed to root for Achilles? he was a huge dickhead and I just wanted to see him die painfully all the time.

Aristotle was always the hero of the Illiad and Heracles wasn't even mentioned, plen.

HECTAR

hector is the true hero, and he dies

>YOU SACK OF WINE
Just smdh tbqh familia

preistessfu wasted no time hopping on his godly murderous dick. fuckin ancient chads

Greeks are turk rapebabies now.

They were 5ft 0 mostly in Iliad times, but frequently described as, pale skinned and fair haired. Like Helen of Troy, who was the most beautiful Spartan, and Spartans had the most beautiful women in the world at the time. And I'm sure Sup Forums will be quick to tell you why.

Most Greeks are more white than Arab now anyway, they just have suntans. When they come to northern countries they look as white as anyone else, unlike Arabs who stay dark.

You know where Troy is don't you?

>le turk rapebabby may may

Finally someone who knows.

Troy is like atlantis, greek fairytale.

it's a perfectly reasonable complaint from the perspective of a student of western lit. obviously it'd be hard to pull off without making it retardedly capeshitty, like tarsem's execrable immortals (pic related) or those godawful wrath/clash/ of the titans movies

>Hector GOAT-tier protag
>Agamemnon GOAT-tier villain

Other notable characters include:
>???

YOU SACK OF WINE!!!

It really isn't

Heinrich Schliemann would disagree

Where's the horse and the fleet?

Just have them not appear in human form, just as the concepts they personify and rule over. Like have a stormy sea and then a pissed whale gets beached or something.

Or show Paris praying to Aphrodite and then getting consumed with passion ect.

Well they're fucking gone now user, its been about 3000 years.

Then where does the inacuracy come from?

>Today many scholars agree that the Trojan War is based on a historical core of a Greek expedition against the city of Troy, but few would argue that the Homeric poems faithfully represent the actual events of the war.

It's very obviously a mixture of both. Calm down.

Too much for an already over-full movie, also didn't really fit the 'historical epic' tone. They could have redeemed themselves by doing an Odyssey sequel and making it really brutal and bloodthirsty and emphasising the mystical pagan elements of Hellenism. Like the part where Odysseus has to make the sacrifice of the sheep to enter Hades. Although I agree, having actors dress up in plastic armour and play the Gods is a bit Clash of the Titans-ey.

Then what inacurracy people talk about?
Too many boats?
English?

From the accounts and archaeology.

Storming the beach is one completely idiotic inaccuracy. There's not a single historical account of that kind of thing happening in either medieval or ancient times. Why? Because it never happened.

Oh really? Did they find Achilles's skeleton?

>Inaccuracy
Inaccurate to what, you fucking idiot? The fairytale you're describing or the actual batley nobody knows anything about? How can something be historically inaccurate about something no one has any clue about how it actually happened except for a fairytale?

Are you telling me soldiers were able to fly?

That's what I'm saying you dumb nigger

You said it was a reasonable complaint, I just suggested a way to do it.

I don't think your meant to envision Ares literally flying around the battle messing with stuff anyway.

The entire movie is inaccurate to the iliad, and it didn't even try to be accurate. It said that it is based on it. In the iliad the war on troy takes 9 years but the movie only spans a weekend, of course it's fucking inaccurate!
How can you even argue about this??

>There's not a single historical account of that kind of thing happening in either medieval or ancient time

"I have never read De Bello Gallico", the post.

No, it's just that opposing landings was not a thing. They'd just land and that's it.

Preventing the enemy from landing only became a viable tactic in the early modern era because that's when it became potentially tactically beneficial.

And turks are greeks in denial.

It really is wishful thinking though. The only thing we know is that what we now consider Troy matches the description in the Illiad. However the Illiad was passed on orally for centuries before it was written down and even if it is correct, we do not know if Homer actually meant the same place. And even if he did, by the time he was alive Troy was already in ruins, so even if he visited those ruins there is no way of knowing if those ruins he described were actually the same Troy he wrote about.

You know your moving the goalposts here don't you.

>No, it's just that opposing landings was not a thing. They'd just land and that's it.

>Preventing the enemy from landing only became a viable tactic in the early modern era because that's when it became potentially tactically beneficial.

So before normandy they all waited for the enemy to arribe? LOL no what about naval warfare, they sent ships to engage and prevent them all the time, this is no RISK my friend.

Having been tracked all the way along the coast by the British cavalry and chariots, the landing was opposed. To make matters worse, the Roman ships were too large to go close inshore and the troops had to disembark in deep water, all the while attacked by the enemy from the shallows. The troops were reluctant, but according to Caesar's account were led by the aquilifer (standard bearer) of the 10th legion who jumped in first as an example, shouting:

"Leap, fellow soldiers, unless you wish to betray your eagle to the enemy. I, for my part, will perform my duty to the republic and to my general."[16]
The British were eventually driven back with catapultae and slings fired from the warships into the exposed flank of their formation and the Romans managed to land and drive them off. The cavalry, delayed by adverse winds, still had not arrived, so the Britons could not be pursued and finished off, and Caesar could not enjoy what he calls, in his usual self-promoting style, his "accustomed success".[17]

Troy may have been a city but the history is made up and producers can do whaterver they want with the movie.
Do your own movie if you want it accurate to a book you probably never read.

I think user meant the armors and tactics and such. Not this stupid stuff that other guy's saying about, 'wheres muh horse' and 'did they identify Achilles skeleton with a arrow wound in the heel'

>muh they can do what they want
Doesn't mean you can't criticise it

Too long

...

>Not this stupid stuff that other guy's saying about, 'wheres muh horse' and 'did they identify Achilles skeleton with a arrow wound in the heel'
My post was a response to "look at this dig site, Troy existed," not about the realism of the movie.

Who would we cast in a new Iliad movie? Don't do the gods though.

Some passing notes on this thread

Yes a civilization the Greeks called Troy existed, but no, there was never any grand 10 year war, Homer's tales are based on folklore and aren't grounded in history. Kind of like how there was a guy called Paul Bunyan but he didn't have a giant blue Ox.

Heinrich Schliemann is a fraud who faked the discovery of Troy, the actual location is still debated.

Anyone who possibly cites historical inaccuracy for disliking a fictitious movie needs to be bludgeoned with a large rock.

The Hector/Achilles fight scene remains the single greatest fight scene in cinema history.

Look at that dig site user, Troy existed. You can nitpick and goalpost move as much as you want, the ruins are still there.

none .. this is man kino at its finest

only numale faggots would disagree

That's what yo sista said.

>Agamemnon
Morgan Freeman
>Odysseus
Idris Elba
>Achilles
Michael B. Jordan
>Patroclus
Jayden Smith

2/10

>faked the discovery of Troy, the actual location is still debated.

Uh no, the site of Troy is regarded to be correct however he dug too deep and in the process destroyed the actual layer that could have been Homer's Troy.

Its set in a historical period.

It is dated, if vaguely. Criticisms of historical accuracy are just as legitimate.

And user, remember what the title of the thread is. You are the one here who needs to be bludgeoned.

>Atlantis
>fairytale

Nice yield.

>no women
0/10

Why didn't they go with actual Mycaenean era equipment? Too confusing for the plebs?

Kek

Make Hector a butch woman. And Patroclus a overtly gay white dude, no subtlety.

>implying that isn't actual criticism

Have you even read the surviving Trojan Cycle?

I've literally been there m8.

>I've been to a dig site that some archaeologists claim to be Troy in order to get funding
FTFY

why are you so butthurt about this dude

You see whats waiting, beyond that beach.. immortality TAKE IT, ITS YOURS!!

It's not really a masterpiece at all, even the director's cut which is improved.

The dialogue is weak and it seems to just be playing at being an epic instead of actually being one. Also Brad Pitt is massively miscast.

Inaccuracy as in all we know happened was there was a Greek attack on the historical Troy. Everything else is unknown, the why, who, how long, etc.

A film can be too long if it's long purely for the sake of it and has no actual substance filling it.

The goofy CG blood and whatnot they added to a PG-13 film to make an R rated version after the fact doesn't really work.

Diane Kruger's tits are the best part of this movie.

Yeah, it's a not-good film.

>brad pitt
>"acting"
>WHAT'S INNABOX
>WHAT'S INNABAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHX

ain't they digital nips though? you could see she had pasties on in the theatrical version

I'm just disappointed there's no Diomedes in the movie.
>Living representation of the perfect Greek warrior
>Bad cop to Odysseus' good cop pairing
>Constantly BTFO gods on the battlefield, even though he's a full mortal unlike the rest of the Greek heroes
>Made Ares his little bitch in battle

They spent several million extra making a longer R rated version with inserted CG blood and nudity even though it was made as PG-13
Like the Die Hard 4 deal

>I AM WEARING A PLANTER AS A HELMET
>Pleb audiences laugh.

>No gods

That isn't true though. Thetis is in it.

Visually you couldn't cast a better actor as Achilles though.

yes you could

The soundtrack that has that has that woman constantly going UUaahHHHHOOOOOOEEEEHHOOOOO

>According to the Iliad there was no soldier in the Greek army who was more handsome than Achilles
Try and find an actor more handsome than Brad Pitt looked in Troy. It's not possible.

Still perfect.

Can you even see the original version anymore?