/swg/ Screenwriting General

How's that script going?

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youtube.com/watch?v=ycfdfinG_P8
youtube.com/watch?v=hXDNGS9V4Us
youtube.com/watch?v=m4DyTjrruVo
youtube.com/watch?v=JcVGDV67L-g
youtube.com/watch?v=o_rz1bluG_k
youtube.com/watch?v=JLUjMWRCzic
fictionpress.com/s/3206139/1/
imdb.com/name/nm3201913/
drive.google.com/file/d/0BxdOPvt4UK3JRDlVSHBmTDFrSEU/view?usp=sharing
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

>inb4 that guy who wants to act in his short because that makes him write better

Moo

Still outlining the first season.

Is that a good plan, or should I write the pilot before I even consider going all the way and making an entire season?

can i give you guys a little taster and let me know where i can improve thanks.

>davidoff: julianne i cant contemplate this any furthur on
julianne: davidoff dont do it then
>davidoff: shut your fucking noise bitch
>*stabs repeatedly*

character motivation is not clear

juliannes a bitch

Finished up a pilot recently. Unsure about going with the cliffhanger ending because it's kind of an overused trope, but this cliffhanger (guy leaving something at a crime scene) leads to more things happening, and isn't just a cliffhanger for the sake of it.

I think you're talking about me lol. I'm considering it but will ultimately decide against it.

Finished my first draft and now I'm reworking the outline and treatment before performing script surgery.

It may be a shit first draft, but it's my shit first draft.

I wasn't trying to bully you bro, just wanted to bump the thread.

No you're probably right tho. I'd have too much on my mind to give a decent performance since I'll be the one running things.

How long do you guys spend pre-writing vs writing?

For me it's probably 85-15. Writing for me is just stitching things together, most of my work is done before I even type the first word on the script.
I loathe all the people who constantly make you believe that the first draft will be shit. It will be if writing is the first thing you do when you start.

A boy falls in love with a girl.

Unable to confess, he is gifted by a deus ex machina with the girl's phone number. Never minding the strange area code, he immediately calls her, and is overjoyed to find out that she has a crush on him as well.

But, the next day, when he recounts the previous day's confessions to the girl, she only looks at him with a perplexed expression. After some investigation, he finds out that the girl he called is not the same girl he fell in love with. In fact, she doesn't exist in this universe at all. She is the girl's alternate universe counterpart, who has fallen in love with the MC's own AU self, who too is blissfully unaware of her crush.

Hijinks ensue as the two strike up a deal to give each other their darkest, most private secrets in order to equip the other with the weapons they need to conquer the heart of their other selves. While the two chase their respective loved ones, DRAMA ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the NATURE of LOVE.

OP: youtube.com/watch?v=ycfdfinG_P8
ED1: youtube.com/watch?v=hXDNGS9V4Us
ED2: youtube.com/watch?v=m4DyTjrruVo
PV: youtube.com/watch?v=JcVGDV67L-g
EP 1: youtube.com/watch?v=o_rz1bluG_k
EP 13: youtube.com/watch?v=JLUjMWRCzic

I acted in my own first short in order to lessen the number of people that had to be involved.
Making a short with next to no budget while maintaining a clear creative vision is difficult.
Especially when you're pulling from an unfiltered stream of amateur cast and crew.
Sometimes it's pragmatic.
It's not always narcissism.

If I had to guess I would say you've never made anything.

Das it mayne das gud.

I really want to write a screenplay for a show but I have no idea about how to get into the industry and all that. I've been thinking about settling for making a novel and then usuing whatever sales it gets to help me pitch the show. I'd be totally fine with just putting the show on the internet too, but I'm way too broke to fund a show

>about settling for making a novel and then usuing whatever sales it gets to help me pitch the show

Now there's confidence!

Let's talk about breaking in (in regards to t.v.)

>Become a p.a. and work your way up
I've heard of people languishing for years before making it but seems to be the best route for those without connections

>enter a contest/fellowship
kind of a crapshoot, yeah? only some are worth it and even then you have to be chosen out of thousands

>build a following online
I keep hearing that but has that ever actually happened?

Any other ideas?

Wow I guess i did kind of sound like a dick there kek

Write good scripts and send them to networks.

That's literally it. If they turn it down, it's not a good script.

Do they accept unsolicited scripts?

What are your opinions on starting with a flashforward teaser? (Think breaking bad). I feel like it's an overused gimmick and will make the writing seem desperate to grab the viewers/readers attention but I've also heard that when you hand in your screenplay they usually only read the first five pages?

I wrote a short script outline yesterday about girl who falls in love with a guy who's secretly kidnapped and torturing someone
it's really different to everything else i've written so i really like it

the problem is that to make it, i'd probably need to find an actual couple who can act in order to get the chemistry right

you spelled 'further' wrong

cold opens are incredibly common story-telling devices to give the audience an idea of where the story is heading or to bypass unnecessary exposition
>ie instead of showing them sitting around deciding how to rob a bank and getting into why they want to, you just show them robbing a bank with brief cuts implying their motivation

No offense, but you sound like someone who hasn't taken one step toward any of the toilsome things you've been toying with in fantasyland.
I only say it not to enable you. If it's not the case please feel free to prove it.

Do they have t.v. festivals like they do for films?

Like you can film a pilot and compete against others?

No you're pretty much right. For some reason I can just never convince myself to finish anything longer than a short story. Usually I just stop liking the story after a certain point and hate it so much that I cant stand looking at it and have to start from scratch.
I have one that I've managed to stay interested in for almost a year but I havent started writing it yet because I still cant settle on what format i want to write for (novel/movie/tv/graphic novels)

Good question.

Not him but I can confirm that this is the case. Check somewhere like filmfreeway which lets you filter festivals, but I keep getting emails about festivals where they specifically mention categories for tv pilots and scripts

Real advice f a m?

Writing is the opposite of what you're doing. What you're doing is waiting. Waiting for it to figure itself out. People who actually write, write a lot of shit that they don't like.
Faced with a situation in which you don't know whether to write an idea as a novel/screenplay/etc, a writer will pick one and start doing it. The answer to your questions occurs while writing, not before.

Be humbled by the process, and take pleasure in it when hard work pays off. If you're not doing this you haven't got a chance

The unbelievable arrogance of you losers to think that people should actually sit down and listen to the dribble that comes out of your infantile little brain is astonishing. You have nothing to say. Your screenplays will, without exception, be derivative, unremarkable nonsense. Stick to shitposting and criticising comic book movies on Sup Forums. That's all you're good for, kiddos.

Cheers for the info.

So you're an actual screenwriter? Hows it going?

You're right, but you sound like you hate yourself as much as you do these deluded spergs.

What have you done?

I'm an indie filmmaker and write my own films
It's hard to make good films without a proper budget but I'm getting there. Currently rendering my latest short which I'm cautiously optimistic about

I'm in post with my first short. Had to put it off for a while to finish up some college stuff and wait for my editor to return to the country. Should be done soon enough. Cautiously optimistic too, but mostly eager to move on to a new project.

I understand the low budget issue. Although, I tried to play into it rather than against it with the screenplay.

Can you link some of your work?

Yeah, I try to write around it. It's more organisation and production issues. But i might it work i guess.
I would link it but I'm deathly paranoid of someone googling me in 5years and finding Sup Forums and then being blacklisted for being associated with this site

Won't happen.

Make a password protected Vimeo link and then delete the video in an hour or so. I think the URL doesn't give away the user.

>projection

...

Stop advertising your shitty AMVs!

Stop posting that because it's already a thing.

fictionpress.com/s/3206139/1/

The guy crossing is a dumbass, but the driver took quite long to slow down.

I've lost the will to write. Send help.

thanks for the motivation shlomo

Why does Sup Forums have the worst memes?

Not too bad honestly. I might actually get to produce one cause I've teamed up with a local director who has done feature film before (albeit in my tinyass home country so nobody outside of it knows about it).

I finished the outline of the plot and have a clear blueprint. Now he's helping me by asking me shitloads of questions about the characters and the world so I can develop them and find writing them easier and more fleshed out. But of course I gotta keeps things simple and do my best to SHOW as much as possible to lessen the amount of dialogue. Too many people stuff too much shit in a short because they treat it like a feature. Too many people focus too much on the plot and not the characters, too.

This shit kills shorts. Don't fucking do it. Keep your chin up faggots, treat it like a real big stubborn shit. If you squeeze it out, you'll hurt yourself but once the time is right, that bad boy will flow out your asshole like a perfect fat stinky pretzel.

This only counts if you've been writing consistently up to now.
If not, you haven't lost it because you never had it.

>mfw there are anons ITT right now who are going to actually make it in the industry, and who have talent/potential
>mfw you're going to remain an angry talentless autist sperging out in a screenwriting thread on Sup Forums

And even if they don't make it, it's a creative and fun hobby. Fuck off you fucking faggot.

Where do you live?

Malta

good luck famalam

Is sticking to writing (as opposed to also directing) something you plan to do in general, or just something you're doing for this particular project?

>/swg/
>No Bill
This isn't a true /swg/ unless Bill graces us with his wisdom

>Writing script about Uni students and time travel

>Come to the realisation that my self insert is completely unnecessary (detrimental, even) and should be removed

>This means that the qt Jap girl is going to have to end up in love with the black character

>No way to get around this because it's an instrumental part of her arc

>Can't make him white because his blackness is intrinsic to him

D-did I just cuck myself?

Isn't this essentially this movie?

I'm unsure. I have another script ready that I want to produce next year too, another short. I actually want to act but I've so little for my showreel I figured fuck it, I'll write my own shit. I don't plan on directing this one nor act in each script I happen to write. I want to get to know the business and the separate crew daprtments more.

For one I'd be the writer/director, for another I'll write and act, another might be working solely on props cause that's another love of mine. Practice everywhere and see where it leads. You never know what doors open for you, just go at it and have fun.

Thanks a million, I'm pretty stoked for it.

what's your end purpose? if it's a pitch, i suggest writing a broad story/season outline, short but crisp synopses, and a pilot. if you're writing it to get a feel of the craft, by all means write the entire season of screenplays. the only way you learn and progress as a writer is by writing. so if you don't have any other pressing concerns writing-wise, go for it.

make the jap girl a black weaboo girl

She needs to be from Japan. Making her Afro-Japanese is too much of an arse-pull even for me.

I swear I'm not racist, I just don't want her to be blacked.

Do you all schedule writing as a part of your daily life or do you write when it comes to you?

anyone here ever pitched a series or film idea/screenplay to a producer, production company, or network? curious about people's experience with this.

Bill O'Reilly isn't a screenwriter

Bill O'Reilly IS a screenwriter.

I try to hunker down and come up with more ideas for writing as part of a schedule "Tomorrow I'll try coming up with ". Problem is that invariably just ends up as me pacing around for hours and getting distracted by the stupidest shit and not getting much done. But I feel guilty if I just wait around for it since it can take me weeks.

You must be new to /swg/ or Sup Forums in general.

Haven't worked on it for three weeks. I can think of a beginning, I can think of an ending, but I don't know how to write the middle.

both. i schedule a block of hours to write every day but if inspiration strikes outside those hours, i hunker down and get to work. the latter often leads to nights with 4 hours of sleep.

Take motivation from the beginning, take the result of the ending and then join the two to help you come up with the middle. Example:

Start: Guy is bitter because no gf
End: Driveby on sorority houses

Middle: Dude was so bitter he started planning an attack, recording himself and voicing his maelstrom of emotions and arrogance. Get guns, contemplates his future acts like he's relishing the impending carnage.

Original movie idea donut steel

I'm coming to the end of the second act but things feel very rushed. I realized that characters I was looking forward to using needed to be bumped off quickly and now the pacing feels awkward. I wrote the whole first draft up to this point in a week and I loved it, then I hit a point where I just kinda lost interest, burn-out I guess. I want to finish it because I have most of the third act planned out in my head save for some details but bridging where I am to where I want to get to is something of a roadblock.

I found a director:
imdb.com/name/nm3201913/

...

not to turn this into a request thread, but anyone here know or have links to any David Milch screenplays besides the Deadwood pilot? specifically looking around for Luck and Money. i doubt the Boss Tweedy one has made the rounds yet and i'm still clueless why HBO seemed to pass on that. is the premise or setting too similar to Boardwalk maybe?

>If I had to guess I would say you've never made anything.

I have directed two shorts, the first one I acted in. For both projects I worked alone handling the camera, mic placement, had to make use of natural lighting only because the budget was nonexistent. I built all my filming equipment and even used wind-up mechanisms so the camera would move for me when I was the one acting. I know how hard it can be too.
Regardless none of your sentences addressed the issue of acting in a short in order to write better, that's just an excuse to avoid facing your writing struggles. And next time keep your guesses to yourself, they give you no profit.

do this bro, we want to see it

you sound so, so bitter
you think the only pleasure you can squeeze out of writing scripts/directing them is to make it big in Hollywood
boy are you wrong
you will never understand why we do it because you refuse to see past your insecurities

I was expecting Paul Latza desu

Not quite /swg/, but I'm working on ideas for 8 music videos fro my punk band's EP. I'm making separate videos that kind of link thematically into a short film that goes with the EP. Coming up with fitting imagery is difficult. Anyone have any experience with this kind of thing?

I have one idea of like a series of flashes of closeups of a mouth, doing things like smoking and drinking and spitting and stuff like that, but every now and then an image of a kiss pops up. Like a weird juxtaposition there. I also have an image in my head of a guy digging up a woman's body, then climbing into the grave and lying with her, then dirt is thrown into the grave and the camera pans up to reveal another version of the same guy burying them. Also thinking about doing some claymation gore like the end of Evil Dead.

Film a punk bastard wreaking havoc in a nice white suburb and make him write 'Sup Forums made me do it' on the walls

So is anyone going to post anything? All you do is talk. Where's the work?

Kek. How about I document my own first person crime spree and the only way to watch the video is on bestgore or some shit like that

Why would you want people's work? This is more like a motivational group, you hear people's stories and get back to yours more easily.

My ideas are too awesome to go into detail

It helps me get better perspective. When I help with the errors of other amateurs, it helps me understand my own errors that I'm blind to. Seeing as we're a community, I want to help my community.

how many hours a day do you guys write

You guys wanna see some edgy shit I wrote when I was 15?

drive.google.com/file/d/0BxdOPvt4UK3JRDlVSHBmTDFrSEU/view?usp=sharing

Zero

Part of that pilot I mentioned. Right now I'm just showing it to a few friends and getting input, polishing it and shit.

Gotta catch em all.

...

Yeah it's going well. HELP

constructive criticism:

i think your writing could be a bit tighter. if you have already established Dwight is wearing tattered jeans, there's no need to add that detail here. also, the first sentence is grammatically incorrect. and how does Dwight take the wastebasket if he's already in the front seat? it should read, "Dwight has the wastebasket with him."

minor adjustments, but they make a difference.

good luck with the project.

Fuck you faggot you don't know me

Writing first draft of the treatment of ninjamovie. FML.

Thanks for the input. Is this better?

Fuck you faggot you don't know me

My short film's rendering! It's not finished, but this render should be the first time I can watch the whole thing and not cringe
I started filming back at the end of march so 4 and a half months later isn't too bad

It's almost 17 minutes, but I'm gonna try and get it under 15 eventually

Congratulations buddy. Good luck. Making it 15 minutes for the purpose of storytelling or to be eligible to enter it in a festival?

Fuck you faggot I don't know you