What is the strangest thing you have ever done?

What is the strangest thing you have ever done?

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Fuckin' define "strangest". Done some bizarre shit in my day.

>greentext

I used to sit at the top of my bed, roll forward to the end of my bed, then jack off. I would get this weird chilling feeling whenever I rolled over, so I'd get hard and do it, then jack off. Sometimes I'd keep rolling as I stroked myself. Cleanup was a bitch.

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This is getting good

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I can cum withing seconds without getting hard by creating pressure on my flaccid penis on a stool like im planking. Anyone else do this?

i used to do that as a kid on my trampoline, felt amazing but lost the ability as a i grew up

your mom

Thats strange...wonder why you lost it
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Your mom

>I acquired schizophrenia.

bothered coming back to this perpetual cancer festival

When I was 12 I used a coping saw and a buttplug.

When my family when on vacation and left me home alone (maybe 14yo) I made it my mission to jerk it in everytoom, including all closets and the attic.

It's my current hobby to take a fist full of various uppers and downers, stay up for 36 hours or longer cleaning my house, then sleep for 20 hours straight.

I masturbate at work constantly.

I roleplay incest rape with my SO.

I came on my dog once.

Made my own dildo from playdoh, called it the dildoh. Froze the playdoh dildoh so the playdoh got hard.
>aw yiss
>take dildoh out of freezer
>go upstairs, lube up
>begin dildohing the fuck outta my faggot ass
>cry tears of joy from one eye, tears of shame from the other
>stop as I realize something
>pull dildoh out of ass
>ohfuck.jpg
>dildoh lost about 4 inches
>turns out playdoh melts pretty quickly
>my warm rectum didn't help either
>go to bathroom
>squat down like a Slav on the floor
>push
>nothing
>push harder
>still nothing
>get sharpie
>scramble sharpie around in my ass so as to pull out the playdoh
>pretty sure I drew the Mona Lisa on the walls of my shit cave
>anyway I formed the melted playdoh into a nice log in my ass
>PUSH LIKE A NIGGER IN THE FOOD BANK LINE
>playdoh shoots out of my ass
>my fucking dad opens the door
>gets on the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur

>BE ME
>HAVE BROKEN CAPS LOCK
>FML
>GO TO FESTIVAL
>FIND ECSTASY ON PASSED OUT DUDE
>TAKE IT
>OHGODBADTRIP.PNG
>SEE GOAT CHEWING ON MUHAMMAD'S DICK

Got a "bloopie."

>played twisted metal 2 with my cock inside an asshole

>Filled myself up with whipped cream and put a buttplug inside
>Went out shopping
> came back home and pushed all the cream out of my asshole
>ate it afterwards

i spread a pic of my dog on Sup Forums and my whole country thought it has something to do with a murder.