Its late and i'm fucked but

Its late and i'm fucked but...

Ask an Australian anything

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Brisbane
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Why do dingos eat babies?

why australians hate new zealanders

cause the cunts just don't give a fuck about anything mate

There dogs and they'll bite ya fuckin face off

x

do you often go out to philippines to fuck cheap whores?

Do Ferris Wheels go clockwise in your country?

cause there bunch of cunts who live in a third world country who need to pave their roads to first world fucking standard. They also beat us occasion in rugby union but fuck them

Where's their cricket world cup?

do you often eat kanoroo stew there? and meals with spiders or with other insects
i'd really want to taste those kind of dishes

How does it feel being an irrelevant version of USA?

what is cricket

Yeah nah not me but few of the old blokes go off to thailand to bang a bunch of fuckin hookers and act like they aren't the scum of the earth

Does yours go the other way yankee doodle?

Yes. Not a yank.

nah really would you eat kangeroo tho it does have lean protein which is good for fuckin being a tank. nah we don't spiders ya weird cunt

how does it feel to have a joke running your soon to be third world shithole?

>what is cricket

Cunt you wanna take this outside?

bumbing

Trump is great thanks you liberal shittard.

i srsly had to google it up tho

if you somebody would give you one house in any country what you choose, which country would be it

The cunt try to get rid of obamacare then all of sudden said nah

Sounds like ya indecisive funny shit cunt to me

Maybe if you played normal American games you wouldn't have this problem.

Anywhere but New Zealand

Nah to serious i would pick some tropical hotel shit in Hawaii

Rugby and Cricket are the best sports that are on offer...

Why the fuck would we want a game thats 30 minutes of play and 3 fuckin hours of shitty ads

Only the weak need healthcare so i don't care if its gotten rid of or not. Why should I pay for other peoples' problems anyway? Only you need healthcare with your shit Australian genetics.

bump

If they are so good then why only you guys playing it and not America? If they were worth playing then we would be playing it.

I love Americans. You guys are the world's entertainment. Such a remarkably stupid people.

oh aren't you a fucking smart one

Australia has one of the highest standards of living because of our socialist attributes in our government.

Healthcare looks after the poor so that they can get better and go back to contributing to society.

wouldn't expect a fuckin yank to understand any sort of social and welfare policies cause most of you cunts are fuckin brain dead retarded and think a really fuckin small picture

watching sports on TV and actually playing them with friends or on teams are two completely different things.
College and Professional sports in the USA do have a TON of downtime.
But if you played those sports with a team or with friends its completely different.

Replace standard with price

you guys don't get into it because its not integrated into your culture. Mate.. to be fair its a matter of opinion and environment. I fuckin love rugby and couldnt stand a game of NFL

Heathcare looks after the poor here too in the states rube.

If you Aussies are so smart why is your country overshadowed by the greatest of America? Ask anyone in the world and every one of them would know America. How many would know your country? 2%? 3%?

Mate you're right
Rugby and cricket are fuckin great to play with a few mates as you can play them almost anywhere with such little equipment and structure

not wrong but it's a fair price for such a really good thing

Healthcare over there in a fuckin joke compare to ours

I'm not Australian, dude the whole world thinks you're all stupid, trust me.

Do you have a passport?

Why would I need a passport when there are so many great places in America to visit? People in other countries go abroad to get away from their shit country. Americans don't need to do that.

And they can think we are stupid all they want, they have to relevance in the world so why should I care?

Maybe but the doctors here are much more intellegent . I had mononucleosis in 2008 and the doctor in australia was amazed how detailed the doctors notes i have here in maryland were. Had to see the doc in aus because i started breaking out in a rash and he thought it was from antibiotics when it was the mono causing it. Literally had to call my doctor in the US to get the right answer.

I had strep throat too thats why i was taking antibiotics

>being a faggot to our nearest and dearest
Y'know how I know you're a shit Aussie?

Never forget.

How the fuck did you australians manage to lose a war and get outsmarted by emus

Emus can take a lot of bullets and the two machineguns involved were rusty. That's the long and short.

Should of asked America to do it for you.

The fewer nuclear wastelands we can avoid in this country the better.

>assuming political identity as a reactionary to criticism

I'd rather live in Fallout than with Emus.

How does it feel having produced the quantifiably best submachine gun of ww2?

It's a big fat bird that nips a bit if it thinks you've got food in your breast pocket. If you'd rather generations of cancer and deformations, then feel free to go with the American method.

Everyone knows of Australia mainly by its joke of stereotype though.

Also, it's probably one of the better stereotypes, just generally being nice, like Canada but with more wasted people.

I'm pretty sure having an Aussie accent is enough of a deformation T B H.

>amazed how detailed the doctors notes i have
That doesn't sound like a good thing considering the purpose of medical notes is to effectively share information between professionals.

At least we don't have to sell our houses to pay for treatment for the finger that we broke masturbating to cuckold porn.

The American accent is strange to the rest of the world, too many hard pronunciations of so many of the letters.

Lmao nice try. No actual Australians drink fosters

NSW 2126 here its fucking 250am go to bed ya gronk

Honestly, not sure how the Brits do either. They'd be well within their rights to send it back with a note reading "fuck this shit."

Would you like to go home to china?

Agreed. Nothing worse than the Australian bogan accent. 95% of the country is full of retarded bogan idiots. They're the white version of niggers

Yes

Our accents get us laid in almost all other countries mate, especially asian ones they fucken love it

What would you say is the most dangerous animal in Australia?

Yet you still get fucked by your dad on a daily basis

They're probably mistaking you for an American

Mate most of the world hates americans I seriously doubt that

Gettin laid is gettin laid

Oh yeah? Your Aussie sluts were all over our American cocks back in the day.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Brisbane

What are the job opportunities like in Australia?

Do your maps have the South Pole at the top? Like do you maps look the same as what we have on a wall at a school in the US for example?

And you went and fucked that up.

We single-handedly saved your country and fucked a lot of your women. I'd like to hear you explain how that was a fuck up.

70 years ago. Somehow between then and now you managed to shit all over that reputation to become universally despised. Most loved to one of the most hated, that's a pretty big fuck.

Machiavelli said it was better to be feared than loved. Being the most powerful country in the world, we don't really need to concern ourselves if the irrelevant countries think we're being a bit mean.

We saved you. You owe us, and we're not looking to collect. It's as simple as that. You're welcome.

We owe you nothing.
You owe us nothing.
Everyone was equally important in stopping the nazis, in terms of the powers anyway. If russia was not there, Germany would have won ww2, If the britbongs were not there, WW2 would have been lost. America was not there, war lost.
Everyone had to put their foot in to stop the Nazis. And America got the spoils. The Nazi scientists who made the foundation for all of Americas current day technology.

You profiteered from the war and were in prosperity, now look at you

Drowned in debt, only hanging by the string of a fact that your currency is the global standard, take that away and you have nothing.

Rome was undoubtedly a great empire, probably better then the united states. Unfortunately being great does not mean undying glory.

You're not feared, you're mocked. You're a joke.

>Everyone was equally important in stopping the nazis

Implying Australia was as important as America in stopping the Nazis. Or even Russia or England.

Implying Hitler even noticed that he was at war with Australia.

Implying Hitler even knew what Australia was.

If only we'd developed a machine that could turn European tears into electricity. That'd be another world crisis we could've solved.

Maybe if you cry hard enough. Go ahead. I'll allow you the luxury, since the fact that you can even go into a Starbucks on Paris Lane and cry away your irrelevance was bought using my countrymans' blood.

The German soldiers that died at Australian hands were probably aware. Not that any of them needed to be there. It's a shame those lives were lost.

Nigga i didn't even say that, where did i say that Australia did not fight the war was lost, i didn't. My point being Americas entry into the war was self-motivated. If your dumb asses protected your docks better you wouldn't have even cared enough to join the fucking war because some dumb ass suicidal small dicks decided to sink your ship.

And besides the point, who even cares? Not you not i even partook in the war, nor decided for it. It was our ancestors who have since passed, no one alive has even seen the war or experienced its effects.

Who cares what the Europeans think? Fact is if you are going to act high and mighty because you live in a country that for a single moment could be called great, can start taking my motherfucking job of shitposting, you got your shit set wrong, cunt. Australia is the capital of fucking shitposting, i'll have you know. Get your own job.

And again, don't act like you even felt the effects of the war. The closest thing you came to war was almost letting some old hag with dementia lead your country.

nigga nazis were just pawns they had to fight people don't understand some of them actually didn't want to kill jews

The floundering of a lost individual, unsure of where he stands in the world.

I'll make it easy - you stand below us. I know it probably sucks to admit that you are and were completely irrelevant, but the sooner you can do that, the sooner we can move on.

I don't know how to simpify it further.

Hey you may seem higher then me on the outside but at least i'm not a slave to my debt.

>implying I'm in debt
Please stop. I'm embarassed form you.

>Please stop. I'm embarassed form you.
you can't even spell 1/3 of your sentence right cunt.

You think you can out-shitpost me with low-quality posting skills like that? think again.

And not in debt? Your WHOLE FUCKING NATION is in debt. You're not even fucking comparing person to person, that much was fucking evident when you waggled your dick about how your grandpa shot more nazis then mine, fuck, who cares about their fucking grandpas, we're adults, son. Fuck, my grandpa lost a fight to a motherfucking emu.

Nigga, If you're going to do better then me, fucking try living in a fully paid house with no debt and the ability to shitpost whenever i fucking want. Mate, Just look at the political landscape and tell me that the feminism movement leading to the oppression of men in your own country is not a fucking issue? We have that shit here but bitches also drink a lot more here too so as long as you don't make yourself known its a non-issue.