Russian language general

Guess what is written on this pic without a translator

Protip: you can't

mother iz diead

"anal byez boli"
i can read the runes but i have no idea what it means

Anal without something.
Probably lube.

Anal without pain?

"anal biz bali"

what did he mean by this ?

Dio
Bestia

Дa.

We have a winner!

Next one:

narod pidor
narod govno
narod gnida
narod gnoj
narod huesos

xexe )

Гoвнo, зaлyпa, пeниc, хep, дaвaлкa, хyй, блядинa
Гoлoвкa, шлюхa, жoпa, члeн, eблaн, пeтyх, мyдилa
Pyкoблyд, ccaнинa, oчкo, блядyн, вaгинa
Cyкa, eблaнищe, влaгaлищe, пepдyн, дpoчилa
Пидop, пиздa, тyз, мaлaфья, гoмик, мyдилa, пилoткa, мaндa
Aнyc, вaгинa, пyтaнa, пeдpилa, шaлaвa, хyилa, мoшoнкa, eлдa.

'A simple clue: how
to call russian -
is people-faggot,
people-hate,
people-shit,
people-?,
people-snot,
people-huesauce.'

>huesauce

No, not really. It's "So-called Russian nation is..."

russian languague sound so hot when talk by women, by men it sound like gansters

>It's a slave shitskin thinks he's funny episode

Good. Looks like it was simple for ones familiar with Cyrillic and too complex for everyone else.

Ok, next one:

Forgot to mention: strongly related to our freundeschaft with Deutche Vold

your mother ;)

...

Russians explain this plz:
>ъ
>ь
>ы
do you even pronounce these in words and are they really so different that there need to be three of them? I would also be very grateful if you could use each of them in a word.

>ъ
not a letter, but a mark of pronunciation (hard)
>ь
same shit (soft)
>
>ы
ты - you singular

Soft shit, yum!

Russian pork?

How exactly dfo I tell the difference between Ё and E then when pronouncing written words?
Is it some of that bullshit where I'm just supposed to know the word and how its pronounced already?

Yep.
Faggots from our Ministry of Science and Education decided that writing ё everywhere is not obligatory.
So yes, you have to memorize it. And even worse - there are plenty of cases when both readings are possible and you have to guess by context.

Yes, but this one should be in German.