Hello i am autistic and i need help responding to a girl...

hello i am autistic and i need help responding to a girl. im usually pretty normal around girls but this chick just makes me spaghetti everywhere
how do i respond
do i even respond
pls help me Sup Forums i dont wanna look autistic
and yes it is my birthday

Happy birthday OP. How old are you now? Also, how do you know this girl?

You already doomed yourself with that gay emoji. All hope is lost.

Keep talking to her user it means something

Just do some small talk faggot.

"So what have you been up to?" or something like that...

keep smalltalking for a few days or weeks, if she responds often and fast, eventually you ask her out.

>Long time no talk
Already failed

Let's break that distance! :) and hah, I better be welcome! What type of birthday would it be if I wasnt?!

Send her that OP. Trust me, I'm a Chad psychologist.

This. There's nothing else to do than this.

Pretend it's a regular chat. Ask questions. Try to have a good time.

1. Don't respond until tomorrow so it seems like you have a life.

2. Ask her some questions about herself, get her talking about things she's genuinely passionate about so that she associates those positive emotions with you.

3. After a little bit of this, invite her to do something with you casual and fun. Don't make it weird, just be blunt about the invitation. When spending time with her remain detached, but demonstrate interest in her.

Also, stop using emojis and stop putting bitches on a pedestal. They're a waste of your time at best.

So where is my present?

send this

Trips always says the truth

Well now just hold on a second how come her name is "Maybe: robin"

The fuck does the maybe mean? Are you not sure if it's Robin?? Do you think it could be someone else but just might be her?

checked OP answer please

no you gaylord when i get a text from a new number it says who they could be
i used to talk to this girl a bunch but then i deleted her number
clearly you own an android

He did say he's autistic

Dubs confirms trips

Doin better than me. They dont even reply when i wish them a happy birthday.

I may own an android but you're the only robot around here autismo

Hurry and reply OP you'll seem autistic!

did i fuck up

"and yes its been too long, as you said, maybe we should go out some time?"

OH SHIT

Not at all dude...why are you si unconfident...you are doing great...just continue the conversation

Say "u tryna nextflix and chill and catch up?"

Chill he's autistic bro that is normal behavior for a spaz

say 'yeah there is! Maybe we should meet up and catch up?'

Happy birthday nigga I hope you score some punani

"I'll help you catch up if you help me catch up. I bet you've grown a lot, like I have too!"

Wanna grab a coffee and catch up sometime?

this

this is the only reasonable response don't fuck this up

the only non autistic option, literally.

really wanna do 'inset anything here' and catch up will work. Worst she can say is no, just do it.

>Telling people to go harass you
You should press charges that's illegal for her to do

...

holy shit, that is the closest a girl can get to "i want you"
because we all know those bitches can't be clear what they want

dont fucking come here for advice, what are you doing. that was your first mistake. its cliche yet simple: be yourself. try not to give a fuck.

shut the fuck up, retard. studies have shown women dont judge men for using emoticons/emojis as long as its not excessive.

Tanner Rhodes posting on Sup Forums, shocker.

SHE'S POURING HER OUT TO ME TELLING ME EVERYTHING HAS SUCKED IN HER LIFE RECENTLY

THANK YOU GUYS VERY MUCH I'LL TRY MY BEST TO NOT FUCK THIS UP
i would post pics but she's talking about personal shit

ok, so youre doing alright so far. just cut back a little on the fakey enthusiasm, faggot. be sparing with the emjois/emoticons, and use less exclamation marks.

Alright OP its your lucky day. I, the capt poon swoon is now present.

You actually have a decent chance with this gal she is showing interest. Now hopefully its not because you are so autistic that she feels sorry for you.

Other anons are right this, need to offer to meet up and catch up. Either ask right now or wait a few more messages. You catch up too much via text before the date is establish there is no reason to meet up.

Coffee is boring get a beer. Better yet just offer getting together to meet up. This could get her over to you place or vice versa.

Couple questions op,
How old are you? And her?
What is your living situation?

-Capt poon swoon

ask her to meet up and catch up, faggot.

A chance? of what? its an old friend thats just saying hi. Just because she sent a message doesnt mean shes fallen ion love and wants to fuck him.

You better post some pics you autistic faggot

kek, shut the fuck up.

careful, you're teetering close to the friendzone pal

lol what studies?

Op no.
You are severely autistic.
Let me help. Personal stories are useless if we do not know the gal.
You made the thread now post it.

In my experience people only tell people this shit if they have no interest in being romantic with them, but I could be wrong

if you havent sent a dick pic yet you have blown it

ASK HER OUT FOR A DRINK YOU FUCKING BETA SHIT

Virgin alert.
You have been friendzoned your entire life. The rest of us dont want to be like you. Op came here for more than friendship so fuck off.

-capt poon swoon
Btw another virgin

Nice trips, but respond OP. This waiting game bullshit is exaggerated. Yes make it look like you have a life but also make it look like you are using that time to talk to her because you enjoy it.

Jesus christ thats friendzone material

Absolutely do not send this unless you want to come off as a total faggot

Post pictures OP. Don't be a faggot.
We don't know her or doesn't matter.

Capt poon swoon here.
So op is a faggot right now while i am in the thread feel free to ask questions. Glad to help.

-capt poon swoon

Idk its still a 50/50
Rando grils usually only dump their emotional shit on you when they dont give a shit about what you think of them.

Fucking sad that Sup Forums has to help you maintain a normal conversation.
But rolling for this

bumping for interest..

Op bailed. Too much normie shit for his brain to handle.

OP she wants meet up! Just keep it there and ask her for coffee or lunch and take it from there over text! Dont throw yourself in there just yet. Wait for the meet up and talk then..

hi captain poon swoon! i have a problem: im not great with girls so i have to ask random faggots on the internet. how is it you have any expertise on this when youre a fat virgin neckbeard who thinks trench coats and fedoras are top of the line fashion? can you really help me??

post pics op

hes gone you stupid nigger.

oka neckbeard

Post pics of the personal shit you fucking beta pussy. fuck you

Ahhhhhhhh a poon swoon request.
Here's the thing i could tell you my height weight build and everything but you wouldn't believe me anyways. But whats more important and the lesson for you today is. Appearance doesn't matter. That you feel that is the only thing that matters proves you need some lessons for capt poon swoon.
Looks are for high school girls. Women are into much more than that. Any man can bag any woman he wants if all the proper steps are taken.

Forgot my tag
-capt poon swoon

Tell her a really bad birthday joke

Fedorafag detected

kys

Op don't use !!!!!!! This so much

See i could tell you i have never owned a fedora or trenchcoat but doesn't matter you won't believe me. You are weak and jealous of the poon swoon. Let me help with your life. You are unfulfilled i can tell. Otherwise attempted insults just make you appear more autistic.

I think he's too busy fuckin now thanks to capt poon swoon

Forgot tag again
-capt poon swoon

Totally ! We should hang out sometime, how about tomorrow 6pm ?

This post is capt poon swoon approved. Poon swoon could get you all off this board and get you into some sweet puss

-capt poon swoon

>appearance doesnt matter

so you are a fat neckbeard who wears fedoras and trench coats, kek.

fake and gay

do you know what those are called, retard?

Ahhh weakness again. This doesn't bother me. I am far from that. What poon swoon is saying is for you guys here who maybe are lacking the self confidence over looks. I was blessed by the poon gods with my looks. A smile that could make your mother gush.
Lets talk about you. Why do you feel attacked and act defensive towards a man trying to help out his fellow bros. What happened to you to make you feel and act this way.

-capt poon swoon

airmax

Huh?

why dont you tell her that then? tell her you're normal around girls but she makes you spaghetti everywhere, then invite her over for a meatball sandwich, bring a friend, fuck her together, spaghetti sauce everywhere, meatballs for life, parmesan cheese in her garlic bread yknow?

pull back on the trying a bit bro, you were almost convincing.

kek, why are these stupid faggots still coming in here giving advice as if OP is still here, use your fucking eyes.

if dubs say you got AIDS from a nigger

Doesn't warrant a response.

kek

wait, judging by your conversation, you havent seen each other in months possibly a year? forget about her dude, she's already shackin up with an alpha, you're too beta for her faggot

Lol as if poon swoon needs your approval. Its okay that you dont get poon. That's why i am here and even tho you act ignorant i am still willing to help. You need it more than some others. Your backlash is a sign of fear. Fear of the unknown and you feel by putting up a blockade others on here will feel maybe you can get poon. They dont give a shit. I am not your issue. You are your issue.

-capt poon swoon

please O captn poon swoon guide me
I know it's all about confidence with the bitches but I don't feel that confident sometimes, and sometimes I don't know what to say.

What should I do? How can I get better?
I know I can do this, but I don't know how

Yes this is a capt poon swoon thread now

well why are you here? i usually pop in to a thread, read the first sentence, then post reply, mb i didnt know you were so invested in this thread to care, i thought only faggots cared

>sends you smiley faces :)

She wants your dick. Send her a dick pic OP

Regards uncel dolan

ayy bby like sum fuk?

Lets meet for coffee and catch up. I'll bring the condoms.

This

you sound like a 12 year old who just started using Sup Forums. way to waste trips, fag.