ITT: Things you think only you do

ITT: Things you think only you do.

>I take my shirt off to shit, or I'll lift the front over my head so the front is around the back of my neck.

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>cut my nails and sniff them for awhile

>I take my shirt off to shit
i take my shoes off if its going to be a big one

Shower with the light off
became a habit because I grew up in a house built in the 70s that featured a bathroom window.

>sit down on the toilet to piss because i cant be bothered to lift up thw toilet seat

I sometimes sniff under my nails when they're dirty.
It's fucking rancid.
I have no idea why I do it.

You wear shoes in the house?
What kind of cunt are you?

...

SIT DOWN AND WIPE MY ASS.

FOUND OUT OTHER FAGGOTS STAND TO WIPE THEIR FUCKING ASS... DISGUSTING FUCKING PLEBS.

>have a heavy, thick, swampy-like but dry fart sitting down
>ballsack keeps it locked down for awhile
it's the simple things in life

no asshole, at work, i dont shit at home

>I don't shit at home

so i dont have to buy tp

(OP)
I have a designated butt bottle.

>tend to either get swamp-ass or tear my anus when wiping too much
>too cheap to get a bidet
>poke holes in the cap of a water bottle and use it to hose down my shitter after taking a dump
>mfw always feeling nice and fresh now

Creative!

I do both because I'm fat and I can't get all the way across either way. This only started recently as I've gotten fatter. Wat do

Play RuneScape without cheating.

I dont drink my own water i just fill some bottles while at work

i dont shower at home either

You're me

>Not getting paid to shit
>savages

Cover every single window in the room with a pillow before I masturbate

YOU SHOULD USE A SHOWER HEAD THAT IS DETACHABLE AND SHOOT IT UP YOUR ASS TO CLEAN. IF YOU CANT DO THAT BRING A CHAIR IN THE SHOWER THAT YOU CAN LIFT A LEG AND SHOOT IT UNDER YOUR ASS TO GET OFF THE SHIT.

TRUE STORY

samefag

sometimes ill fart into my hand and smell it. why? im not too sure.

>take your shoes off goy

>Brush teeth while pissing in the sink

>say goodbye to my bonsai tree before I leave for work

I get naked and slav squat on the toilet to poop. Can't fully empty my bowels without doing that

I put my boxer shorts on backwards and poop through the dick hole.

Same dude get on a diet. I've lost 13lbs already do it

>I have my girlfriend spread her huge asscheeks and pancake slap them on my face before I go to bed

What said. I've been trying to lose weight too, and counting your calories alone works wonders. Also, exercise. Do pushups against your kitchen counter if you're too much of a fatass to do normal ones. Three reps of twenty every day, that's piss easy and it's a start toward building muscle so you can exercise more. Swim if you can, because then you're basically getting a full-body workout - I did a hundred laps almost every day back when I was still in school and for a while I could eat basically anything because I was burning it off faster than I could put it on.

I do that when I fap, then just cum onto my stomach/chest.

>samefag
I POST TITS FAGGOT. MY ONE POST DID NOT HAVE TITS. PROBLEM FAGGOT. GO BACK TO LOOKING AT DICK PICS FAGGOT.

Holy shit, OP. I do the exact same thing! Put the shirt over my head so it's on the back, or I take it off.

I poop naked, even at a friends house. If i'm in a public bathroom i'll just pull my pants down but its really uncomfortable and i barely shit.

My brotha

in your own sink? in your house?

I also piss in the sink. It's the perfect height and saves water.

!!! I do this too!!
Ever since I've been a kid I prefer to be as close to naked as possible to poop.

I use the predator technique to masturbate. I always thought I was the only one doing that

I only clean myself and my room when someone is going to see me

I take my shirt off to shit, too. I';ve always had this fear as a kid that my shirt would fall down behind my arse as I squez out the turd and it would wind up getting on that. So I take my shirt off to shit.

I also find that when I fart or shit, I always find my arse is sweating brown about half an hour afterwards. I find two squares of bog-roll folded between the arsecheeks does a nice job of stopping me from having shitty butt sweat after the most minor of tasks.

>cover windows
>with pillows

if I'm at home I do this. when i'm fully naked, i can just focus on the grunting. this is especially important if it's a giant or difficult shit.

if it's a public restroom, i ALWAYS take the time to rip off some toilet paper and put a nice layer over the surface of the water where my poop will land (to avoid splash) and then double layer the seat. I use the first toilet paper for the water surface because some cunts do stuff to the last tip of the toilet paper.

so you take your shoes off in a public restroom?

not exactly, its only one shitter, like pic related

Sucking warm creamy logs from Andy Sixx's ashole

mah nigga

samefag

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discord.gg/cMD2Vch

I also do these.

I'm scared, what is?