APOLOGIZE

APOLOGIZE

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>You will never be Michael Phelps
>You will never be wrecking pussy in the Olympic village as the greatest Olympian of all time

Phelps 4 prez

CUPPING PROVEN SCIENTIFIC

Michael Phelp's wife is HOT

Seriously though, what a fucking legend

He holds the most medals of any Olympian ever by like three times over

There was a gymnast the other day and Rio was her 7th Olympics. Thought that was interesting.

He's a fucking fish.

too bad he's a marijuana junkie

Is he "Our guy"?

>shaved pits

what a cuckold

>tfw I got cupped in 2006
>tfw way ahead of the curve

>unshaved armpits when swimming

retard detected

Why?

The sole argument against Marijuana is that it makes you lazy and unmotivated, which he clearly isn't

>he's never swam competitively
Bro, he doesn't have a single hair below his eyebrows.

>3 Fried Egg Sandwiches
>Bowl of Grits/Oatmeal
>5 Egg Omlet
>3 x French Toast
>3 x Chocolate Chip Pancakes
>2 Large Ham and Cheese Sandwiches
>0.5 Kilos (1+lb) of Pasta
>1 x XL Pepperoni Pizza
>0.5 Kilos (1+lb) of Pasta
>Energy Drinks

Could you eat what he eats in a day?

Well that marijuana junkie beat the best of the best. What does that say about the rest of the world?

I hear he shoots up pot almost every day

So swimming is the sport of effeminate cucks, then.

Fuck. What a junkie. I wonder how many pots he injects every day?

If I was swimming and smoking dank kush every day? you better believe it nigger

Remove all carbs and you can actually lose weight eating that

That's a light breakfast for me

Not even close to true. But he does have more gold medals than anyone else has of any medal

lol nice bait nigger

>Could have shown the world how unbelievably great and progressive we are by trotting out a token Muslim to bear the flag in the opening ceremony.
>decide to give the honor to some white male who has the most gold medals of all time.

Who else /disappointedtobeamerican/ here?

Shitty bait, take this (You) and fuck off

>celebrating a doping cheater

How dank is his kush?

really makes you think

>that muslim fencer got rekt by a qt frog
based

Yeah maybe it made YOU think. Brainlet.

im a 6'3 lanklet and i could easily eat this in a day

especially if some good bud is on deck

please tell me you used the phrase "good bud" ironically

Steroids.

You mean the man who worked his entire life to become the best and finally get the spotlight to represent your nation?

You think he should just ate aside because of politics? Fuck off you liberal shit eater the man deserved it. Just giving shit to people because of their race is not the way to do things faggot.

The Olympians have to test before they compete.

I have a theory that Michael Phelps is the first known meta human to ever exist

ITT: DUDE WEED LMAO

Nah, Nolan Ryan was. Bionic arm having motherfucker.

He worked on his swimming technique is all. It has basis in the animal kingdom that's why he's efficient, he modeled it after the dolphin if I remember correctly.

Oh, and she didn't work hard? She had to work 4 times as hard as Phelps (twice as hard for being both a woman, and a female) to make the Olympics.

Mate have you seen the jaws on all the women in the olympics? That shit aint clean, everyone's on the best designer drugs their country can buy.

>smokes pot
>still a greater person than you will ever be, in ten of your lifetimes

He's the hero the world deserves, AND needs right now.

Please quit your job so you can give it to a woman. Please give your home away to the needy. Please let Jarome fuck your wife.

Fuck your bait got me never mind.

He doesnt tho. He married Ms. California. Why the fuck would he bother with Croatian weight lifters or 12yr old chinese gymnasts when he has literally one of the most attractive woman in Freedomland?

>I FUCKING HATE WOMEN WHY WON'T THEY FUCK MEEEEEEEE

You're pathetic.

How badly is the US going to beat the other countries
How much will those other countries spend bribing gymnastics judges for medals
Why does the US win everything that's based on score or time

...

>Potheads getting triggered ITT

Yes, one Pothead isn't a COMPLETE and total failure at life.
Too bad that doesn't outweigh the remaining 99.9999% of Potheads in the world that are insufferable retards that can barely tie their own shoes.

Serious question, why hasn't America produced any good black swimmers?

How can one man be so based?

dude is engaged with a kid and a Christian now
sorry degenerates, he's not yours anymore

Because nature hasn't produced any good black swimmers.

>Too bad that doesn't outweigh the remaining 99.9999% of Americans in the world that are insufferable retards that can barely tie their own shoes.

Fixed that for ya.

>Taking this low quality bait

Lol bootyblasted Australians thought they would get more golds

>whines the guy posting shit anime gifs

>ywn have innumerable stds

he was clocked throwing 88 a few years ago

Could I? Most definitely. Should I? Hell no.

I would be interested to see if dropping the carbs and focusing on the protein in that would let me lose weight, though. I'd also skip the energy drinks because I don't actually NEED the energy.

8 eggs altogether, ham and cheese, pepperoni and cheese...seems like a lot of fat, but...maybe.

>le swimming medals

AND THE GOLD FOR THE CATERPILLAR BACKWARDS THIGH STROKE GOES TOO

>(twice as hard for being both a woman, and a female)

Swimming medals shouldn't even count.

I have the metabolism of a hydrogen bomb, I could literally eat the population of a Chinese village and not gain a gram. It's a blessing and a curse.

Already do

Omaga?

because he can, Tiger Woods had a smoking hot wife and he still fucked every skank that moved

OP, i know you take Sup Forums as the nu Sup Forums.
but this thread belongs on Sup Forums, /news/, Sup Forums, etc. get out of here.

Is she okay?

delete this

...

Holy shit, was she okay?

>that ketchup and jelly mix

Lol

...

That's an Onion article...right?

...right?

>text girlfriend
>she's black
>told me she can't swim

Shit, maybe it's real. I need to teach her how to swim ASAP.

>Yes, one drinker isn't a COMPLETE failure but he doesn't make up for the 99.99% of drinkers that can't even tie there shoes

Or maybe, just maybe, it's all about moderation user and that addiction is addiction. I'm currently going to grad school at NYU and I smoke on weekends because I'm an adult who can handle himself accordingly, the same as drinking or eating or etc. Being anti pot because people can't moderate themselves you may as well be anti anything that people can bindge on.

easily

I eat that many calories of clean food, it fucking sucks

Epic and edgy bro haha

>when Sup Forums comes to Sup Forums

Hey a picture with text under it! I unquestioningly believe it!

The US will have the most medal because they have the most completing athletes by a couple hundred people. If they had the same number as china, China would win. More competitors=more chance of getting medals. Not rocket science desu senpai

Well if you were with a woman and found out she had a penis, and you're not a /d/enizen, I could see how that being hidden from you would be upsetting.

>I need to teach her how to swim ASAP.

It will all be in vain

youtube.com/watch?v=8th7xusEHiA

Her joints must be FUCKED

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

YOUR 2016 30-DEGREE ANGLED DOUBLE-FOOTED CHEST PADDLE GOLD MEDALIST...MICHAEL PHELPS

>12,000 calories
>Clean food

...

I hope that's a fake. Seems like it because I can't imagine anyone's that stupid. Sup Forums racism jokes aside that would be truly devastating to be those kids parents. They're all related, thats all the children of 2 families completely wiped out. Tragic desu

who the fuck is the asshole that saved the last felon?

Yep. RIP JaTavious, Takeitha, JaMarcus, Litrelle, Latevin and LaDarius.

>3 strawberry shakes
>3 tall glasses of milk

Dafuq?

...

>yfw he's going to die young

How tall is he?

any good picture of olympic pusy mound im so horny!!

He's American he's gotta shoot up something

1/4 of that a day and im set

is this real? context? before you judge, remember there's two sides to every story.

what movie was this?