USELESS SUPER POWERS THREAD!

USELESS SUPER POWERS THREAD!

The ability to swim really fast, but only when its not water.

Good at sports but stuck as a nigger

...

The ability to grow your fingernails as long as you want at will.

Ability to breath underwater, but only while holding your breath.

Ejaculate white hot thermite with the accuracy of a military sniper, but your eurethra is not heat resistant.

And to be honest, night invisibility would just make you 5x deadlier at night,
And 1 second super stength would give you a wicked death punch

That's not useless, that's just dangerous

kek

the ability to fly, only while underground

Super-strength, but only when you're asleep.

the ability to see the future. yesterday

Well if you had the ability, would you ever use it?

the ability to instantly forget how to play guitar

You can run super fast but your legs are made of jello.

Can read minds but you are stuck in a coma

Well fuck, call me mineshaftman

Or basement pidgeon

You can produce lightning but your brain has a shock everytime you produce it.

Able to smell shit anywhere

thats just living in a city...

You are incredibly good at videogames but terrible at anything else.

the ability to predict the ending of every book or movie just by seeing the cover.

cal me SPOILERMAN

ability to have a feminine penis but only if you were born a woman

You suddenly gain a work ethic as strong as steel, iq quantuples, become selfless which in turn makes you a great family man and a stand up individual, but you're a nigger.

the ability to do any drug and not get high or overdose......

You can start the genocide of a race, but you can only kill 6 million

Xray abilities but only with 70 year olds and older

i would kill myself

kek

Or 10 and under. Equally disgusting.

depends on who you ask but I agree

The ability to fuck negroids but you have to

>Be me
>Have the power to attract bullets
>Join the military
>Discover my powers first time sandniggers start shooting at me
>Military catches on
>Issued armored box with retractable wheels and air conditioning and shit
>Drive out into middle of road and sit there, protecting my comrades from enemy fire while sitting in my box jacking it to loli on Sup Forums.

the ability to waste any amount of time

The ability to contract any STD

>seduce hats
I would walk into stores, seduce a hat so that it escapes the store, and then sell it back to said store. I beleive that it how trumps father came upon his fortune.

livin' the life

The ability to sweat permanently