So, I'm contemplating suicide.
tl;dr: I'm a failure and non existent prospects for the future and the shame of failure made me consider ending it.
Graduated from highschool with good marks and got accepted into a good university. I was young, stupid and lazy. Fast-forward 8 years and I've been suspended twice for failing multiple courses multiple times. I've managed to kick myself in the ass, pay off student debt and pay for tuition on my own, however even with the high marks I'm getting now, there's no hope in graduating with a remotely decent GPA that will allow gradschool or any sort of job.
Can't apply to a college or another university either as they'll know about my past marks and reject me.
My folks and friends think I'm smart and have high hopes for me, but I can't face them and tell them that I'm a failure.
Just wanted to vent, also looking for painless ways to suicide.