ITT: poetry

ITT: poetry

There once was a fellow named Matt
Who fucked this one girl who was fat
He came like a geyser
when he shot up inside her
He popped her and then she went flat

The once was a hobo named Dave
Had a dead whore in his cave
She smelled like shit
and was missing a tit
But think of the money he'll save

A singer stepped up to the stand
Bowed, and said 'give me a hand!'
He sang so loud
He blew up the crowd
And the orchestra thought it was grand

I thought I was a fucking wordsmith when I made this up in elementary school

amazing

what a poet you are

Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to get her dog a bone
as she bent over
rover took over
and gave her a bone of his own

There once was a man from nantucket with a dick so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin with cum on his chin,
If my ear was a cunt I'd fuck it.

There once was a lady from Wheeling
who had a particular feeling
so she laid on her back
and opened her crack
and pissed all over the ceiling

Trayvon thought assault would be fun.
But he didn't know George had a gun.
He swung for the head, and ended up dead.
Now worms eat the Martin's thug son.

There was a man from China
Who drove a Mini Mina
Hit a rock
and split his cock
and now he has vagina

There was a girl named Mary,
who kept her pussy hairy.
She didn't shower, every 24 hours,
and didn't know why it smelt scary.

Army of Gordons

Peas, beans and oats in your butt
A penis in your butt
Wednesday night, we go down to Pizza Hut
I take you to the shitter, guess what
Another penis in your butt
Peas, oats, and beef in your butt

Lying Gordon

Is that Yeats?

I sympathize with
the old people in life alert commercials
falling down sucks
literally or metaphorically
but for the latter
there is no button to press
to call for help

pic unrelated

The most famous limerick.

Here's a stanza from Barnacle Bill:

The cabin boy
was the captains joy
a dashing little nipper,
put broken glass
up his ass
and circumcised the skipper.

Once upon timr
Daddy likey my hole
I shit white pee pee
Nigger
Nigger
4

please write a book

There once was a very gay OP,
Who started a thread of poetry,
The thread blew up,
But it wasn't enough,
And he sat alone saying "woe is me".

I'm going to get dark on you, user. *Ahem*

Ye of earthy hearts,
Depart this forsaken realm!
For hereforth monsters lie,
Ancient demons of hell!

Broken bones sleep soundly,
Softly in their graves,
Torn asunder with their pagan idols,
Whom which I dare not name.

Nightmares haunt the living,
Mortality grieves us all,
Death is but a siren,
And I shall heed her call.

The Devil whispers sweetly,
Promising vain delights,
Mankind is but a flame,
And the Lord shall extinguish the light.

Amen.

A R T

The Whole by Anonimius

Whein i was six i assed. An nigger saw my assery and started assing off so I creamed my jeans and said "listen here nigger" and he assed. My dad fucks me. When he was finish assing, I let out a hearty ass and assed to grocery store for butt kreme. I am a hole.

Feminism multiple genders man hate is on their agender
Period blood clots in a blender get arrested for calling fags benders can't go on smoking cat shit in a bong ,bong bong bong op is a fag and sucks nigger dong
>all backed by interpretive dance with albeno dwarfs dressed as rainbows

Not bad

Top kek

you are man

Thanks bruv

the sequel is never as good as the original

my name is blur-ryface and I, care what you think

...

i just spent a good 45 seconds heartily laughing at this picture out loud

Yo fuck the haters mane I'm an artist nigga i create while you hate oh shit here we go
Cre-ATE... eat. Cre-eat. Eat my creations.
Filled with penis
I am.

Suck, fuck, cuck, truck
Beating meat is good luck
Fuck me daddy

I still hear the screams
Trump supporters cream
Liberals dream is no more showed that Clinton whore
Putin poised for war trump on all fours on the floor taking dick while Korea stand by and look in awe

your mom likes gallons of scotch
thats why i touch her crotch
its 17 dollars
this took me 24 hours
and your poetry stinks worse than my crotch

Nice job rhyming "crotch" with "crotch"

Tripple Nipple by F Skat Fistgerald

Fuck fuck fuck fuck
Bestiality in my truck
Three nipples daddy have
With penis my fist I stab
Big blacl cock is real good

Retard - noun, slang: Disparaging and Offensive.
a contemptuous term used to refer to a person who is cognitively impaired.
a person who is stupid, obtuse, or ineffective in some way:
a hopeless social retard.

Mind blown

yiff in hell

the roads are the dustiest
the winds are the gustiest
the gates are the rustiest
the bars the crustiest
the songs the lustiest
the friends the trustiest
waaaaaaay baaaack home

what an original and thought provoking stanza