/mlb/ General: Christen Edition

Since none of you fat fucks decided to make a new one, here it is.

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First for Christmas
twitter.com/Phillies/status/812734606734606336

Cold stove dead as fuck because Christmas handegg edition

literally the ugliest girl on the entire nt

...

LGTSS
>berlin wall

press a shit, Alex best girl

Royals

...

>soviet union

All I want for Christmas is McCutchen to the Mets

aren't the pirates asking for a stupid amount for him

Shoutout to all the niggas that said I was dumb for putting $2500 on the Browns to beat the Chargers. Merry Chri$tma$

t. Hope Solo

Cardinals t b h senpai

What's the return on that shit?

What is it about the Boston area producing the best fans in sports

lmao at the Jays thinking they'll get McCutchen
spent all your prospects to win absolutely nothing can't make it up

fuck off w-we have pearce and smoak

HOW DO YOU FUCK THIS SHIT UP REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

FUCK

Gib beisbol pls

I'm going to miss Castro behind the plate. Why couldn't he just hit a few balls?

>Jose Bautista
How do we fix this shit?

I would cum on her face if you catch my drift

$11500

No I don't, what did you mean?

Whoa Jose's lookin good

Timestamped pic needed

Reminds me of Priya Price

I would ejaculate my semen onto her face

Like this

How do they shoot ropes like that?

it's kinda abstract but I THINK I get what you mean

Who will sign poor Jose Bautista? Will the A's swoop in and get him like they almost did edwin?
Tbh I could see them signing him to a 1 or 2 year deal and flipping him at the deadline. I think they did that for Matt holiday.

This team's most iconic logo is a big red down arrow

Who is the whoville whos?

No, the A's gave up a bunch (including Carlos Gonzalez) to get Holliday, sucked for half a season, and flipped him to the Cardinals.

>Holliday's contract includes a no-trade clause to the A's

White Sox

Ever edged after not jerking off for a while?

Just one more myth perpetrated by Boston.

Like the one about David Ortiz being clean.

The A's were after EE so why wouldn't they target bautista? Their draft pick os protected and he will cost considerably less.

EEs a good guy
Bautistas a bitch

EE is younger, and had a better 2016 than Bautista. I don't think it makes sense for any team to lose a draft pick over Bautista desu

Perhaps but I doubt beane gives a fuck. They could sign him for 1 year and an optional 2nd. I don't know just seems logical to me.

And Bautista is running out of options. A 1 or 2 year deal with Oakland might be his best choice at this point. Or maybe a 3 year deal with an opt out or something.

The A's don't lose a pick though did you even read my entire post? They don't have to forfeit their pick because they finished bottom 10.

>did you even read my entire post
lol no sorry

Yeah and I'm not sure any other teams who don't lose their pick are willing. He should see if he get a 2 year 35 million with a 3rd year team option.

KEK WILL LEAFS EVER RECOVER???

Smdh family

Please stop Press posting

My dick can only take too much

They still have to forfeit a pick, just not their first rounder. It's their next pick.

I'm married. I have sex like 4 times a week

I think I'm in love

Hang on guys hang the fuck on

Why were the As trying to get EE??

Because Beane gives no fucks anymore.

Will he try for Joey bats next?

Probably to show their fans that they mean business
Unfortunately it was a bluff all along and the A's continue their own little art exhibit

hopes of making the rest of us jints fans so the A's can relocate

kek leafs absolutely blllleeeeown the fuck out

hard to say it was a bluff when they were offering more AAV than Cleveland's deal

A's need a decent offensive threat and actually have some payroll flexibility (only the Dads have less committed next year atm), so why not? I expect them to go after Bautista as well especially since he's open to a 1 year deal.

Money can only get you so far, playing for the Athletics has got to be a dealbreaker for any player with self respect

Man that's got to suck

it's like when your girlfriend calls to tell you she doesn't love you anymore and is moving across the country at the end of the month and you know it's done but you still hold out a tiny hope and then the day comes and she actually goes and it's like reliving the despair and abandonment all over again but way worse

>The 2017 Jays will finish well below .500
>Cancerous Jays fans will be completely gone from /mlb/ by the ASB

Feels good

None of the lesbians on the US soccer team are attractive, don't let the media fool you

A gay Seahawks fan
There's one big fat fucking surprise

I don't have to think she's that attractive to spray my jizz on her face, just a lil attractive. she could get it fa sho

>Seahawks
>mlb
Smfh, my point is the only attractive female athletes play volleyball

Don't forget tennis, famm

Tennis players are usually ugly because tennis requires an unattractive body.
>fat thighs and calves
>big shoulders and forearm
>low center of gravity
Attractive women's tennis players are an aberration. That's why mangiants like Sharapova are considered cute in the WTA.

hey can you teach me Talking Out of Your Ass 101?

Have you ever watched tennis before?

Just because you have lowered your standards doesn't mean everyone else has to. Most women's tennis players are fat baboons.

Tennis girls are hot af, what are you on about?

Tennis girls that matter are in their 30s no thanks

Did you guys watch the Olympics? The volleyball games were low key soft core porn desu

t. virgin who can only fall in love with plastic 11/10s

Let's go over some photo evidence of tennis girls being fucking hideous. Exhibit 1, Victoria ASSarenka. Yeah, real hot.

>azarenka
>not literally the hottest, coolest chick in the WTA

dude if you just wanna come out and say you're a faggot, you don't have to be so elaborate about it

Shitbulkova, basically a sack of meat with short limbs. Has the face of a butcher.

How many drinks would you need to fuck this?

>white "women"

Syndegaard with (tiny) boobs

>i'm going to cherry pick the absolute worst photos of stronger and richer woman than me to make a point about the relative and objective beauty of universally acclaimed pretty athletes in a sport I don't understand on the baseball subreddit of a chinese cartoon website

k I'm done I'll come back later

I'm literally picking the first photos that show up on google images.
If you need to be photoshopped to be presentable, then you are not hot.

Bost qt tennis players den

>tennis players aren't hot

lmao is dis niqqa serious? why is he sperging out about it here?

upskirts of this girl were like the entire reason for living in the 90s, this isn't even a sexy pic but she is absolute wife material

>tennis players aren't hot.
Please. I used to beat off to pic related and Martina Hingis pics from the SI for Kids I got at school on the regular.

Forgot pic

Tennis girls are so ugly that Miss Foreheads was considered 9/10 by WTA standards. Because the alternative was something like this.

>tennis players aren't hot at all lmao they got all these big calves and bad nails also I literally cannot stop sucking dicks

>guys I'm seriously totally not gay, woman tennis players are just gross (like all women tbeh)

What the fuck is going on in this thread

cold stove

>this just isn't up to my virgin standards
>please just feed me cocks I literally cannot look at women anymore

k we fucking got it, jesus christ

>3dpd

Merry Christmas is what

Well, none of those were right