Story of my life

Story of my life

cheecky fuck just put a pizza in a pizza
and heres what gets me, even the pizza box is made of pizza

You mean you get what you expect in a situation and it's actually more awesome than you ever could have imagined?

8.5/10 life

Story of my life

Story of my life

I like that 9gag watermark.
Maybe you should just wander out in the woods and neck yourself.

Story of my life

Story of my life

Story of my life

story of my life

Story of my Iife

Story of my life

Same bruh

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nice. i smoked for abour 37 nuffin. bought friday sum shiet for 50 bucks. smoked friday, yesterday and today i do the same. that's life.

for about 37 days*. sorry i am stoned.

It takes as many seconds for Bill Nye to light a blunt as there are genders

You mean time is continuous, not discrete?

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YES!
TRANS LIVES MATTER!
Now let's go beat up some straight white people

Story of my life

ye, fuckin cis scum shitlords!!!

nah let's stay here and make sweeping generalizations about trans activists

I dunno. I'm often called 'lucky', but it's not easy.
Things happen around me that really should not happen. There's been times when electrical devices go on the fritz just as I pass by. And then they go back to normal just as I leave the room. I've seen steel shear itself with no force placed on it. I know - unbelievable, I wouldn't believe it either, had I not seen it myself. Things go wrong around me that would be considered impossible. In college, I was talking about my bad luck. A guy claimed there was no such thing. So we grabbed a dozen dice. Statistics say we should roll an average of 3.5. The more you roll, the closer to 3.5 you should be. I averaged 2.7 after 800 dice rolls. And when I bet on my losing, it only snapped my average to 3.5. So I can't even bet against myself to win. Another guy rolled the same dice and got 3.5, so it wasn't the dice.
Things break around me, impossible things happen around me, I can never leave anything to chance. And yet, somehow, through it all, everything ends up all right. There's always some solution or resolution.
Which is why I'm called 'lucky'. Shit hits the fan, everyone is freaking out, and I'm calm as a lake because I know there's some way out, just gotta find it. Then they're all impressed. Don't be, shit's been like that all my life. You've only seen it once.

mfw there is no graphic for my life

Sounds like me.
If something is going to go wrong, or will be fucked up, I'll be the one getting it.
When I got married, I told my wife I was a bad luck magnet. She laughed and said yeah yeah.

Two years later she told me "You know? When you told me that, I thought you were just being a whiny little bitch looking for attention. But after being around you for 2 years, and seeing how you continually get shit on by the universe, I can see you really have it bad."
She hugged me and said she loved me and woud help me through the end of time.
And she still does.
The only great thing that ever happened to me that stood the test of time.

Story of my life.

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I'm from Canada, where the "Hawaian" pizza was invented. We have no real national dish here, and there no typically traditional dishes that people make. People have bad taste here, and this pizza is the proof. No wonder why it's popular in countries with no culinary traditions or culture. Also, people should know that mixing different acidity (ph) foods is not a good thing for the stomach. For example, cheese is "basic" on the ph chart... while pineapples is "acidic". They are literally on opposed sides. Just try to drink milk and lemonade, or milk and any drink with citric acid... and tell me what happens to your stomach. Shit makes no sense, like most of the shit we eat here.

I recall a scene on Babylon 5 where Londo Molari recounts how, when everything is starting to look up and he begins to feel a glimmer of hope, the universe has a nasty habit of shitting on him right at that moment.

Seems that way for me too. My entire life so far has been either weathering a storm or preparing for one.
I know those feels.

I thought you had poutine or am I wrong?