Be me

>be me
>meet girl online
>talk over 4 year period
>want to be together but don't want long distance relationship (another state)
>Said enough is enough
>Brought here here on my dime and gave her a place to live (has no family or friends here)
>Everything is awesome
>2 months later, tells me she's pregnant
>Shocked.png
>Embrace the hand given to me
>Have the most beautiful awesome daughter I could ask for
>1.5 years go by, find out gf is shooting heroin
>Insanely supportive, very understanding, whatever it takes to get her clean
>Gets clean, says she tried before but couldn't until I knew
>Says she will never do it again, and if she has urges she will tell me
>Shady behavior starts up again
>Tell me I need to come home from work because she is "sick" ( has happened too many times for me to be fooled )
>Can't get out of bed to take care of daughter, lets her run rampid through house or stuck in her crib from after nap time.
>GF constantly dry heaving and puking up really dark bile looking liquid.
>Her ass blew up in the bathroom, on bathmat, on outside of toilet, on floor next to
>Tell me she is not going through withdrawal
>On day two of this and I know better
>She will be fine by tomorrow but it's only a matter of time before she goes looking for more behind my back.
>If I confront, she gets super defensive and says "omg, I can't believe your accusing me"

What do?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=k0t0EW6z8a0&ab_channel=ricks
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

overdose her, take care of daughter alone

Document everything and I mean everything.
Throw her junkie ass out.
Keep child and raise her right

Celebrate that you got trips

I don't want her to die. Alright really seems like the easier option. Everything in me wanted to keep her in our daughter's life. But at what point is she going to hurt well being for her? Is it already gone to far?
I really might start doing this. Document how? Like take now in how she acts, when she's sick and when she's gone?

Triple nickel

Checked

Both are valid answer.
I take a week off (not everybody can do that I know) and stick to her like fucking glue.
Maybe think about moving back to her state where she has friends / family to support and make her feel better.

I don't know what I'd do. But there must be answers.

she has a daughter but she still ruins her life, she will ruin your life and your daughter's
but if you don't want to suicide her, then you can take your daughter while your so takes yet another trip and tip off the police, they will take care of the rest
pussy

Once a junkie always a junkie

ex addict give that bitch a ultimatum you or dope easy as that.

Fucking heroin wtf, why can't she just drink like a normal person. I feel sorry for you OP.. I would dump her if I could coz people rarely never touch it again.

If her mom was alive she wouldn't even be here and her dad is a meth addict. No surprise I know. Her friends are the reason she is an addict to begin with and wouldn't have any support from anyone. At least I have some family here that will help from time to time.

It just seems like I'm trying to fight a tight that cannot be won. An addict will win %99 of the time.

In these case you have to have rock solid papers proving to the best you can what you're accusing her of.
Testimony from people around, social services auditions etc...

But be aware it might devastate her.

I think i'd try to work it out with her by taking a few days off to stick to her during the hardest of the withdrawal.

Dude I hate to say this but you literally cannot change someone like this. Take it from someone who's been with a serious heroin addict before and who has also personally struggled with other forms of addiction. Just get your daughter out of that environment while you still can. Do it for her if not yourself or she will grow up to be just as fucked up.

It's simple, acquire evidence of past and present drug use to make your claim to have custody over your daughter stronger.
Break up with her for a while, wait till or if she sorts out her shit.
Either drugs are more important than her family or their not, only one way to find out.
Chances are she'll cheat on you or she already is to obtain drugs, so get out while you can you could get aids.

speaking from experience you can't force a junkie to get clean it has to be their own choice you can give them ultimatum you know rehab or the streets they'll choose rehab but it's not their choice more then likely they'll be back on dope soon as you give them some wiggle room

Don't ever stop riding her about it. She needs to want to quit before anything productive can happen.

She will hate you and will probably leave you before she quits shooting heroin.

this
and
this

This. AIDS is a legitimate fucking risk here..

First get hers diler phone nr, (give phone nr to police)
Get someone you know like a frend - preferably that works as a cop,... so that the dude comes to her in uniform and starts asking about the diler... If everything goes well - she will be scared da fucq out, so that she would stop using...
Drugs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ or prison.

You have to get her out of the picture. She obviously can't control anything. Having the kid stay and grandparents is okay temporarily. You are going to get a divorce, and if they know shes a drugee you'll win custody.

Ok dude, was just thinking "out loud". That's fucked up because the best way to get someone heads off the dope or other addictions is to have human warmth around them.
She must feel lonely and cold while you work.
Try to get her in local community work, associations or stuff so she has other things to think about than just getting high.

But I know it's a fucking hard fight. Spent 5 years as a teen dealing with my mother alcoholism in a pretty hardocre fashion. I know how hard it feels. Hope you'll be alright bro.

OP, this gonna be the most brutal and hardest thing you will ever have to endure.
People that are addicted are actually sick. Trust me, there is no one who wants to get clean more than she does. No one on this planet. But the addiction is a bitch. It broke something inside her and awakened a lust, she is unable to controll, a hunger, that consumes her. She will tell you everything, she will paint you the sweetest pictures of your future, far away when she is sober and you gonna believe her, because she isn´t even lying, even she believes herself. Until the hunger kicks in again.
It actually is possible to get clean and stay that way. To be a responsible parent, even with that past. But it takes a long time and professional help. You can´t go without.
Source: My father was first cocaine and then heroin addicted for quite a long time when I was a kid.
Get proffesional help. Move to another place where there is no one that will remind her of her old live. And seek motherfucking proffesional fucking fuck help!
The only chance you have for you, your beautiful daughter and her, if you don´t want to lose em is this. Otherwise you need to break all bounds and let her go. For your sake. For your daughter´s sake

Move to a state or place where it will be extremely difficult for her to acquire heroin

Is it your kid? It's your kid right?

Did you get married?

Honestly she isn't gonna change. If I were you I'd cut ties, drug junky is going to ruin you financially and emotionally.

save your child

seek professional help asap

>are actually sick
mentally ill
indeed

I literally didn't think I would have gotten this much good feedback. First time I've actually came to Sup Forums with a REAL life problem.

Her position is just as bad I guess. She's literally had nothing neither here nor there. She cannot hold a job and would never be able to live on her own. Let alone try and raise a child if we broke up. If I took custody from her then she would probably just an hero.

It's such a hard decision to make. Almost as hard of a decision for her to come here. I am pussy because I don't want to destroy everything that I made.

This is it. This is how I stopped shooting meth daily cold turkey.

I refuse to take steps to establish a contact and that's probably what you need to facilitate.

youtube.com/watch?v=k0t0EW6z8a0&ab_channel=ricks

Seek profesional help. I don´t know how it is possible in the US (asuming you come from Burgerland) or if it is to expensive, but this is the only chance. And get her away from everything drug related, old friends, dealers, whatever.

If she can't get clean for her kid then it's most likely useless. Gather evidence, get her family on board, and give her an ultimatum. I get that you don't want to give her the boot but it's not just your life she could ruin now.

No idea how feasible it would be for you to take a good few days off like a week.

Clutch the cleaning program on the Friday, get back home and babysit the shit out of her.

Try to raise some hope like "once you're clean we're going to find you a part time job" or "pick something you wanna do and we gonna enroll you so you can have other things in your mind".

Try to get your mother / family into it to babysit the baby as much as possible so she can focus on getting her shit together before having to focus on the baby.

It's a hard task brother but it can be done.

Maybe even talk to her about going to rehab, give the kid to grandma for a while until she's out and clean.

Eventually even if she's clean there is going to be hard fucking times of cravings but try to prep talk her into being a boss and beating her addiction.

You're gonna have to be 150% of a normal person for a few months, but it's that or walk out, raise the kid alone (or find a decent woman who will accept it as close to her own) and let her anhero.

Your call.

You can try the first solution before going full no fucks given and walk out.

But you can't half-ass it like you did until now. You'll have to commit immense amount of energy, time and willpower to make it go the right way.

No idea how much support you can get from your family though. For example, if I gave my kid to my mom she'd be "omg best day of my life, can I keep it and nurse him for a while... like 10 years ???!" lol

Being a parent means making hard decisions for the betterment of your child.

You gotta decide who you love more, your girlfriend who does drugs and is ruining her life

Or your innocent daughter who has a drug addict mother and a father whos consumed taking care of the habit

Give your daughter all the attention you can user. She'll love you forever.

find support group for her to have an intervention

OP i dated a girl that wad a heroin addict and basically it boiled down to this; you cant help someone who wont help themselves. Junkies will always be junkies its always in the back of their head to go get a fix, they can be a year clean and just have a bad day and shoot up. Ugly drug imo but id just dump the bitch and ship her ass back to whatever state shes from. And shes being shady with it which makes me wonder what shes doing to get the dope. but thats just my 2 cents

>going to ruin you financially and emotionally.

Haha she already has. I work 50+ hours a week. Come home and do everything else too. Cooking dinner atm.
She is already is in counseling. She did have oxys and kpins but since her last stint that wound her up in the hospital from missing. They took all hey narcotics away. Haha fucking retard. I wish I had a pic of the bulges she had on her arm.

abandon hope.

Take your daughter and leave her

nice trips.


kill her. no more problems. take care of daughter is easy now.

Don't know if anyone's suggested this yet. Maybe LSD, DMT, etc might help. I've heard stories about people getting clean after tripping. I would try this last of course, but before you suicide her.

Living with an alcoholic wife. She's been sober for 3 months but im still afraid she's going to drink behind my back while im at work or somewhere else. We have a 6 year old boy who was worried about his mom always being sick and came home asking if his mother have cancer. He's growing up too fast, six-year-olds shouldn't fucking know what cancer is.

Anyways, get help and try to leave before its too late, it will save your daughter in the long run.

Get real help ?

It's already too late OP.

People don't change - she will forever be like this, and there is nothing you can do except remove your daughter and yourself from the picture. You need to put her in rehab, get everything documented, or else they will give her custody.

Cut losses here and now.

become even more of a degenerate junkie than her

Have you considered that the child is probably not even yours?

Junkie behavior is pretty predictable.

If I were you, I'd get parentage tested and then leave. If she's yours, take er with you

interesting

maybe get her addicted to somthing else, less hamfull

people with addictive personalities need somthing to be addicted to, eminem was addicted to running, maybe shift her addiction to something productive

Alright OP.
I thought this wait bait but aftwr reading the thread I believe you.

Dude I'm gonna level with you hardcore right now and help you fix this shit.
Sit her down and be increbidly stern with her. Tell her this shit is done you are done with her and the heroin. Tell her straight up that if it doesn't stop right fucking now she is going to lose you and everything else in her life. If she even tries to start with the "your accusing me" bullshit cut her off half way through and say "we both fucking know whats going on here and I'm done playing games"
You need to play both good cop and bad cop on her.
You need to tell her you love her more then anything else in the world and that you really truly want whats best for her. Ask her how she thinks you two can best solve it together?
You need to cut her off from the source. Don't give her any money and don't give her access too a car or things to pawn or even a cell phone.
She will have a stash somewhere. Demand it. Take it. Tell her to flush it.
She might title pawn you car without you knowing or sell some of yor shit real talk I've seen it happen first hand.
Oh and by the way OP you are part of the problem. Quit being an enabeling little faggot. Yes you bitch. I say that from one user to another that cares about you. Quit being a little faggot and take control of a situation that clearly fucking needs it.

Damn dude, haven't heard something so true ever.

"people with addictive personalities need somthing to be addicted to"

I just quit smoking ciggarettes like half a month ago, and now I just find myself depressed as can be, I have no motivation to do anything, and I have an extremely addictive personality, to the point that if I get drunk one night, I'll drink every night until I run out of money. If I smoke weed, until I run out of money, it has really fucked my life up. I need some sort of positive addiction.

Ignore everything but this guy, he knows what's up

She is without a doubt 100 percent mine. She is literally a spitting image of me.

The crazy thing is, when she came here she was clean for a year or so and she was a smoker. The second she found out she was pregnant, a light flipped off in her head, and quit immediately!

She was sober her whole pregnancy and for some time after. She was a different person. More hangry than anything else.

Not till six months ago or so did she start shooting for the first time (partied with her nose before). I know she doesn't want to be caught in it's grips but we have been through this time and time again.

I feel like giving up.

Follow this advice, OP.
You can't tolerate any of a junkie's bullshit. They'll use you in any way imaginable to get their fix. It'll hurt, but it's necessary.

try to get addicted to gym, and become a /fit/izen
or to writing
any job that you do
coffe(?)
there are enought things in the world to get addicted to, just choose one of them

I think getting fit would be something to push towards, problem is, one of the only gyms by me is that god damn planet fitness, and the lunk alarm is so hypocritical for a 'judgement free zone' that I will not give them money.

Writing could be nice as an addiction that's not physical, I think I need at least 2 things, one physical, one at home addiction.

Tell her to get help. AA/NA or take the kid away.

You can't get broken down by the addicts tactics of shifting blame or accusing you of not trusting them. An addict CANNOT be trusted, if you do, you will be hurt.

There's not much you can do besides get yourself and the kid out of that situation. She will only make the decision to get clean and stay clean once she hits rock bottom. Taking the kid away will make that happen faster

a brother of a good friend of mine is also addicted to heroin. its heartbreaking to my friend beeing torn apart because of this. he is a real great person. his brother was 3 times in rehab and 3 times he quitted because he couldnt stand it without. its like the people said. if they arent 1000% behind the idea of getting rid of their addiction theyre going to fail sooner or later.

im sorry for you op. thinking of how much it hurts to see the person that you love, the mother of your daughter in such a mess must be heartbreaking.

i guess if she wont stop for you and your daughter there will be nothing that will make her quit.
Maybe if you find the source where she gets it you could stop it? like call the cops on the dealer? take a day off. follow her.

these seem like the only options to me. if these fail leave her behind no matter how much it hurts but the person that you once loved is no longer there then. we will be here for you Sup Forumsrother

English, motherfucker....

Feel for you bro. Her too only because I dealt with being in her place for a bit over a decade. Lost my kids over it. Honestly it was the best thing for them because I wasnt and am still not capale of being responsible or not putting dope first. It sucks. Regrets, what if's, all that shit. Junkies will only change when they want to. But even then, even while clean, it will be an hourly battle that odds say she will lose. If the kids the most important part to either of you, you need to get your kid and get the fuck. Down the road if the bitch straightens out and you feel pretty sure of it, deal with it then. But for now, the kid man. Single parent house will beat the fuck out of living with a junkie parent.

As an ex heroin addict she is definitely going through withdraws. Put her in rehab bro if she doesn't want to go get a lawyer.

im sure you can find what to get yourself addicted to if you put your mind to it

dude, it seems like you're taking care of 2 children...

You're working your ass off, both in the house and out of it, and your WIFE can't even keep a needle out of her long enough to take care of herself and your DAUGHTER!? Do you realize how negative of an influence that can be on a child? Don't continue this mistake. Kick her out, put her in rehab, whatever you wanna do, just do SOMETHING quickly.

You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders, look at your situation objectively. It's really fucked, and you're the only one trying to hold it together. You have to know this can't continue the way it is.

OP, why is she using heroin?

get to the bottom of it, have her put into a sober living center, if real desperate call intervention.

it'll be hard but it's better than dealing with an addict on a daily basis. she needs to be treated, a child growing up in that type of environment is no good.

also if she jumps onto the thing that she wants to overcome her addiction because of the family you built you need some kind of sign that she can hold onto and remember why she needs to let go of drugs. so she can regain motivation even when youre not there