Ask a Schizophrenic anything!

Ask a Schizophrenic anything!
I may take a while to reply sometimes, be patient.
Free (you)s for all posters!

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vocaroo.com/i/s1XkZL4NMr4G
vocaroo.com/i/s1vc8aYDuRwG
vocaroo.com/i/s1N97dsek1Tl
vocaroo.com/i/s1LcuN05kKxr
vocaroo.com/i/s1wTfilZNGZu
vocaroo.com/i/s1b9XaeJAL0u
vocaroo.com/i/s1MVi1SZIlks
vocaroo.com/i/s0iDmtbWAe9l
vocaroo.com/i/s1JtoyPUCVfH
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Schizo doodle bump

rumpo bumpo

What did a schizophrenic usually experience?

>What did a schizophrenic usually experience?
What do you mean?

can you visualize, do you have mind eye?

>can you visualize, do you have mind eye?
Wait, aren't those just normals things everyone can do?

Do you think about when you get old that your schizophrenia is gonna completely take over your mind and you will only be a shell of a person you once were?

I'm sorry. I mean what do schizophrenia go through that normal people don't have too.

>Do you think about when you get old that your schizophrenia is gonna completely take over your mind
I think about it quite frequently. I want to say that I'm afraid of that day coming, but I'm not.
>I'm sorry.
It's okay.
>I mean what do schizophrenia go through that normal people don't have too.
That's a really difficult question to answer; as I do not know what it is like to be "normal".

That's just sad man...don't put it like that. Does it have good sides? Is it fun sometimes? What's the names of your friendly friends? Or how even is it manifesting?

I heard that schizophrenic person hear voices.Is that true?and if you don't know what is normal then how do you know you have schizophrenia?

Are you real?

...

vocaroo.com/i/s1XkZL4NMr4G

>That's just sad man...
It's just how it is.
>don't put it like that.
Why not? There's no sense in hiding from the truth.
>Does it have good sides?
Everything has good sides. One of the better "qualities" of it is being able to connect with people who have a similar mindset to me.
>Is it fun sometimes?
It's not very often, but it can be. I can get lost in completely different worlds that look nothing like the one we inhabit. Stuff you couldn't even imagine seeing. It can be really beautiful. But there's a flipside to everything.
>I heard that schizophrenic person hear voices.Is that true?
Some do, yes. I happen to hear them as well.
>and if you don't know what is normal then how do you know you have schizophrenia?
A doctor.
>Are you real?
Are YOU real?
I like it.

Is it hard to live with a schizophrenia? Or it's just a mild annoyance?

Are you boy or girl? I know a -kinda-schitzo girl and was wonder what a schitzo would appreciate to make them smile.

How vivid are those worlds? How's the sensory bussiness in those worlds? See/hear/touch being clear sensations. How long can you stay in the same one aprox and how well can you interact with it? Is it like a movie or more like a fucked up fuck me shitty sensless game which you don't really get?

Also, any relation between them and how your general vibe in the moment is?

I'm curious OP

>vocaroo.com/i/s1XkZL4NMr4G
>that accent
Is that a nzlder I hear?

>How destructive are your voices
On a whole, not very. There is one voice in particular that can be very destructive and has made me have some of the worst panic/anxiety attacks of my life.
>Is it hard to live with a schizophrenia?
It can be very hard. Having zero motivation to do anything at all, not wanting to talk to your friends, or leave the house. Constant noises in my head that make it impossible to concentrate.
>Or it's just a mild annoyance?
The average day is closer to a mild annoyance, but still pretty rough.
>Are you boy or girl
I am a boy.
>was wonder what a schitzo would appreciate to make them smile.
I like it when people attempt to understand what's going on inside my head without any judgment. Being able to connect to someone on that level is quite satisfying.

vocaroo.com/i/s1vc8aYDuRwG

Have you ever hurt anyone or come close?

How often do you go off meds, and why?

>How vivid are those worlds?
More vivid than reality. The closest thing I can relate it to is having a dream that feels like reality but what's happening is nothing close to reality. If you've ever had a dream and wondered if the dream was actually real that's what it feels like.
>How's the sensory bussiness in those worlds? See/hear/touch being clear sensations.
Seeing and hearing is very clear, but touch can be a little off or completely nonexistent sometimes. For the most part, though they're all pretty good. There are times when my senses "feel" more than they do in reality.
>How long can you stay in the same one aprox
Usually between 1-3 hours.
>and how well can you interact with it?
On average I can interact with them a lot. I can change what's happening, "modifying" the rules of the world to see what happens, stuff like that. Or I can interact with the things that are there.
>Is it like a movie or more like a fucked up fuck me shitty sensless game which you don't really get?
I'd say it's more similar to a game, but not shitty at all. Sometimes it can get extremely nonsensical though.
>Also, any relation between them and how your general vibe in the moment is?
Not that I know of.

Can you tell if being schitzo gives you any schitzo specific interests or desires?

Vocaroo-user, your voice is amazing.

Hi, I have schizotypal personality disorder. I am from Russia.

vocaroo.com/i/s1N97dsek1Tl

Glad to please.

>Aussie
Ah, I can't quite differentiate aussie and nz accents.
Your voice is very smooth, I'm sure you get that a lot.
>hmmm, hmmm
Hmmm?
>Have you ever hurt anyone or come close?
Yes, I have hurt too many people.
>How often do you go off meds
Always, I don't take any medication for anything.
>and why?
Because I dislike the idea of medication. It violates my very morals as a person.
>Can you tell if being schitzo gives you any schitzo specific interests or desires?
I don't know if it's related to the Schizo; I am very interested in observing people and things to see how they operate though.
>Hi,
Zdravstvuyte
>I have schizotypal personality disorder
That seems to be fairly common among the chans
>I am from Russia.
Ooh one of my favorite languages.

Why does observation fascinate you?

vocaroo.com/i/s1LcuN05kKxr

Have you hurt people physically or mentally? Also, don't you think taking meds to make sure you don't hurt people is more important than your personal disliking of medication?

You retards are only in this thread cause you think OP is a girl.

>Always, I don't take any medication for anything.
>Because I dislike the idea of medication. It violates my very morals as a person.

Gah, you remind me of all my other patients of meds. all the best, hope you take better care of yourself than they do.

OP said they were a guy. I'm here because m y abusive mom has the illness and I wanna understand her better.

Thx op, you're a nice guy.

I know what you mean with the dreams. I was lucid dreaming a while back and i know that they feel much more HD. You can't practicaly function if it can take 3 hours right? I mean for the others your like on 400 of lsd or something. It can be hard for you if you wish to have a "closer to normal" life but i hope your not clinging to those ideas. Life is an adventure anyway, you're just drugged 24/7. If your life is in constant suffering you know it's not worth living, but i'm sure you can, and you should, in your situation reflect on what's going on in a meditative no judging way. It's not like we're all going somewhere and you're the slower one, it's more like we're in a bigass park and do whatever so you happened to be blessed with constant hardcore psyhedelics.

And dude, in my opinion, you can always parachute out and start a new one bruh. If something happens once, is destined to happen again ;)

Op already said he's a boy. There's also voocaroo of him.

The vocaroo-user isn't OP.

>I feel they are my reality of the time
That is essentially how I perceive my hallucinations and "internal worlds".
>Why does observation fascinate you?
You know, I'm not 100% sure.
Something about just observing things to see how they cope with things, and how they perceive their own worlds.
If I had to answer it simply, it's because I like to learn about other living things. There's no better way than observing them.
>I never know what to say
I can imagine. It's a strange subject matter. Have you ever considered doing readings or stuff like that? Your voice should be heard by everyone.
>Have you hurt people physically or mentally?
Yes, both.
>don't you think taking meds to make sure you don't hurt people
Well, I haven't hurt anyone in a very long time. So, I'm not terribly worried about that.

I seen you a lot of times here. I must say you're a good boy user .

If you could choose to get rid of the schizo aspect of yourself, would you? I guess what I want to know is, what bothers you about it? What does it bring to your life that you'd like to keep - or amplify - and what parts of it are holding you back?

Do you ever experience "command" type hallucinations? When the schizo part of you takes effect, how does it usually manifest? Tell me about some memorable experience, if you have the time. Something sacred?

There was already admission of being a boy, regardless of vocaroo skepticism.

>Gah, you remind me of all my other patients of meds.
I've found it's a very common thing, a lot of the people I've met who also suffer from a mental illness also feel the same way about meds.
>all the best
Thanks, user.
>hope you take better care of yourself than they do.
Not really. I'm still alive though, so it can't be too bad.
>I'm here because m y abusive mom has the illness and I wanna understand her better.
I'm more than glad to help you in any way I can.

I know. I wasn't the guy saying we thought OP was a girl. Just wanted to correct you

Was in response to

vocaroo.com/i/s1wTfilZNGZu

I never intended to pose as OP, but merely converse.

>Thx op
You're welcome.
>you're a nice guy.
I get that a lot, but I tend to disagree.
>You can't practicaly function if it can take 3 hours right?
Not really. I tend to stay in my house 99% of the time. I've never done well in society even as a child.
>It can be hard for you if you wish to have a "closer to normal" life
When I was young I clung to that idea. But, as I've gotten older I don't feel that way anymore. I am who I am.
>If something happens once, is destined to happen again ;)
When that day comes, we'll know.
>I seen you a lot of times here.
I do tend to fairly often.
>I must say you're a good boy user .
I disagree, but thanks.

What is your source of income, OP?

>If you could choose to get rid of the schizo aspect of yourself, would you?
I don't think I would.
>I guess what I want to know is, what bothers you about it?
The thing I dislike most about it is having zero motivation to do anything. Feeling like I've constantly got a boulder on my chest keeping me from wanting things.
>What does it bring to your life that you'd like to keep - or amplify -
I'd keep the observation portion of it. Being able to just look at anything and see patterns and be able to understand things on a completely different level than the average person is something I like.
>and what parts of it are holding you back?
Primarily the apathy.
>Do you ever experience "command" type hallucinations?
I have, I've been told to kill people, it can often be associated with an image of whatever I'm being commanded to do.
>When the schizo part of you takes effect, how does it usually manifest?
Mostly I just withdraw completely from everything around me. And just go into my own little world.
>Tell me about some memorable experience, if you have the time. Something sacred?
Hmm, I'll have to think about this for a little bit. I'll come back to it later if I can think of something.

How old are you, OP?

The level of stupidity in this thread is astounding. If you retards want to know what schizophrenia is then open a fucking book or go to a state hospital. It sure as shit won't be someone you see posting bullshit and talking about their faggot feelings with a bunch of strangers. Stop saying you have these incredibly serious mental disorders when it's obvious you are just a lazy piece of shit looking for an excuse to act like an infant so you won't feel bad about your shitty life. Faggot.

OP seems to legit have it, though, no matter how lazy he may or may not be.

>Edgar Allen Poe
That would be quite interesting to hear. I was thinking of something along those lines.
>isn't as smooth as it could be
I wouldn't have known if you hadn't said anything.
>What is your source of income, OP?
SSI
>How old are you, OP?
25
>The level of stupidity in this thread is astounding.
The word you are looking for is ignorance, not stupidity. There is nothing wrong with ignorance.
>If you retards want to know what schizophrenia is then open a fucking book
A book can only tell you so much.
>or go to a state hospital.
Yes, clearly that's the best way to learn about it. Go see the minority of people who are afflicted with the worst cases of Schizo. That'll teach them something really good.
>about their faggot feelings
I've actually haven't mentioned my feelings.
>so you won't feel bad about your shitty life.
I don't feel bad about my life at all. But clearly, you do.
>you are just a lazy piece of shit
As are most people who are afflicted with Schizophrenia.

You seem really upset by an ama

For myself - not schizo, but medicated for other reasons - I always felt that meds masked the essential issue. Unsustainably. Sometimes medication isn't a treatment; it's just getting through another few days, or a week, or a month, without dealing with the abscess at the center of your life.

While that's happening - without bringing side effects into the discussion - the meds can suppress some of the best aspects of perception, interrelation - living, in other words. They work for some people. For others, the cure can be worse than the "disease."

In our society, I think too many people reach for medication as a solution - first and foremost - without thinking about mindset or lifestyle or coping strategies. One of my personal heroes, Viktor Frankl, was outspoken on psychotherepeutic treatment of schizophrenics - without drugs. Sometimes it's just better to know - and deal with - something than it is to try to drug it away. I love drugs, btw (can't do them anymore due to work, but I fantasize). I wish it was that easy and beneficial, but so often it just isn't.

vocaroo.com/i/s1b9XaeJAL0u

Hey OP, I hope you have a great day!

I hope you get better, OP.

I don't think OP can "get better", but I do hope OP can cope with their schizophrenia

I understand the apathy, I think. The "boulder on my chest" thing hits home (it did when I was younger, anyway) - bored out of your skull, staring at nothing, feeling pinned there; the absolute lack of energy.

If you come up with an experience, please do post it; I'm curious.

What I meant.

vocaroo.com/i/s1MVi1SZIlks

Hope you can fight your depression, vocaroo-user.

>You seem really upset by an ama
There's always one.
>They work for some people. For others, the cure can be worse than the "disease."
This has been my experience with all types of medication. Even for something as simple as a headache. I've never taken anti-psychotics but I know people who have, and the thing I always hear is "it makes you feel more empty than the apathy" I'm paraphrasing, of course.
>In our society, I think too many people reach for medication as a solution
I agree, I think medication should be a last ditch effort to get someone out of a terrible downward spiral they can't escape otherwise. But instead, medications are just thrown at the issues with little regard.
>I love drugs, btw
Recreational drugs? I love those too.
>The more I talk the more stressed it gets
Now that you mention it, I can hear a subtle difference from your first vocaroo. I could be crazy (I am).
>Hey OP
Hiya.
>I hope you have a great day!
Thanks user. I hope you have a great day too.

Work with it just a little bit, and you'd be an great narrator. Seriously, try it out sometime if you don't have anything better to do.

Do you have names for your voices? What do they sound like and what do they tell you?

Fucking Psycho!!!! HAHAHAHAH.
not gunna lie tho ( no homo btw ) you seem kinda cute and I would fuck you like my little boy toy bro
love,
Satan

vocaroo.com/i/s0iDmtbWAe9l

vocaroo.com/i/s1JtoyPUCVfH

Careful, you might cut yourself on that edge

>I hope you get better, OP.
It's pretty unlikely, but I appreciate the sentiment.
>I don't think OP can "get better"
It can happen, it's just not super likely.
>but I do hope OP can cope with their schizophrenia
I try my best to.
>feeling pinned there; the absolute lack of energy.
That is essentially how I feel all day, every day.
>If you come up with an experience, please do post it; I'm curious.
Is there a particular "type" of experience you want to know about? I'd be glad to share one it's just difficult to reach in and grab a random thing.
>Do you have names for your voices?
I do not.
>What do they sound like and what do they tell you?
Two are female, one of the two has a raspy voice. Closest I can relate it to is Mio from Nichijou.
The other female has a soft voice.
The third is a male, and has a very quiet voice.
>Fucking Psycho!!!! HAHAHAHAH.
WUAHAHAHAH
>you seem kinda cute
I have been told that I am cute.

>love,
>Satan
My favorite person.
>Confidence
That's to be expected. When I lose my confidence I often lose control of my voice also.

hey bub, do you jack off, and if so, do the voices ever talk to you wile you do it or some crazy shit like that happen?

love,
Satan

p.s. you better fucking answer me cuck

Yeah, that's what I was being prescribed for, at uni. Overworked psych, saw me for half an hour every month. "Hmm... this isn't working. Let's try a higher dose."

Nobody ever thought to say, "hey, look at your lifestyle. The way you're living is killing you." I was too young and boneheaded to get it myself. That sense of urgency you mention, though - I've always wished I had a bit more of it.

That oddly looks like something I would put on a paper which I often do. But I am pretty sure I am not a skitzo

I was lucky to only need the 37.5mg SR tablets.
Anything higher and I would've got a lot worse with the loss of urgency and lack of caring.

>do you jack off
Obviously. Though I haven't in close to a week now.
>do the voices ever talk to you wile you do it
Yes, they do. It can often be distracting. They usually talk about unrelated things.
>some crazy shit like that happen?
Nothing really crazy has ever happened I don't think.
>p.s. you better fucking answer me cuck
Don't tell me what to do.
>That oddly looks like something I would put on a paper which I often do.
I think that type of doodle has some correlation to a personality type. That's the way it seems to me.
Perchance, are you an INTP?

hey cutie, do you like an authority? it doesn't take 5 min to type out like 5 responses ( so hurry up with these responses love) . God won't save you when we start dating and I dominate you my psyche cutie. I'm going to snuggle you to do death. Do the voices ever tell you to kill? they tell me that all the time.

Love,
Satan habibi

Myers-Briggs is complete bullshit. I'm not the guy you were replying to, sorry

What the fuck. That isn't even a shitpost

do the voices sound in your head or like right in your ear?

>do you like an authority?
What?
>it doesn't take 5 min to type out like 5 responses
It doesn't take five minutes to type, it takes five minutes for me to organize my thoughts.
>God won't save you when we start dating
Oh, is that so? You're fairly confident.
>Do the voices ever tell you to kill?
Yes, but it's not very common. Only at my worst does it happen.
>Myers-Briggs is complete bullshit.
I wouldn't go THAT far. It has flaws, but it does retain some validity.
>do the voices sound in your head or like right in your ear?
It's somewhere in between. It's like the voices are leaking out of my head into the real world and I can hear them that way.

>Perchance, are you an INTP?
Yeah, you are right.

Vocaroo guy here, further question:
Have you been affected by sleep paralysis much?

I've had two notable times, the first I had a smokey skeletal figure reach out with his skeletal hand while I freaked out.
The second was without that figure, but I was overstressed by it.

i have seen this fucking thread 3 times in the past week shut the fuck up

I'm the user who called it bullshit. I initially also got INTP but it keeps changing. There are people who's results change every week. The test is backwards pseudo-science.

when and how did you or others tell you you should go get diagnosed

Whoa, man, calm down. I haven't.

did you develop schizophrenia over time? if so, when and how did you notice it

What do you mean what? do you like to be told what to do, dominated. Thats what an authority figure is. damn I want you my cutie. I can imagine you must want to rely on a big strong demon. mmmmmmmm. You struggle with some things so I would come and make you do nothing but wear a skirt and some thigh highs. I would cater to your every whim.

Love,
Satan ;)

I took the test moments ago just for the reply.

Type of experience? The closest I've come to your experience was probably the time I spent with some exotic dissociative drugs.

I felt like I understood some deep, gnostic secret of existence, and I walked around like Buddha walking the earth, just "knowing." The trip aspect went a good deal further, and I wish I could remember or have another chance to experience half of it. The best of those substances is gone for good, and my job/life can't tolerate anything like that, for a few more years at least. Barring long vacations.

I guess I want to know if you had any enlightened, transcendental moments. Some thought or entity that provoked a feeling of deep understanding, or something you found profoundly beautiful.

>The third is a male, and has a very quiet voice.
Arioch?

dont mind me, im just want my (you)

>Have you been affected by sleep paralysis much?
Actually, I have never had sleep paralysis. I've even tried to induce it (naturally, of course.) I've always wanted to experience it.
>i have seen this fucking thread 3 times in the past week shut the fuck up
Firstly, don't tell me what to do, shitlord.
Secondly, do you post that in all the generals that clog up page one that are reposted literally constantly every day?
>I initially also got INTP but it keeps changing.
That's because you keep changing your answers. That's the flaw with the test, it's a self-report.
>did you develop schizophrenia over time?
I believe I was born with it, actually. But it has worsened over time.
>when and how did you notice it
I noticed it around 20ish. I don't really know how though, I've always known something was off about me.
>What do you mean what?
Your wording was weird.
>do you like to be told what to do, dominated.
Don't know, I've never been dominated.
>damn I want you my cutie. I can imagine you must want to rely on a big strong demon.
I'm not gae tho.

>Type of experience?
Yea, like is there something you specifically want to know about? It's very difficult for me to just reach into my head and pull out a random idea or memory. I need something to focus on. "Experience" is too vague, I've had many experiences.
>probably the time I spent with some exotic dissociative drugs.
They can put you in a very close to Schizophrenic-like psychotic high.

>I guess I want to know if you had any enlightened, transcendental moments.
I have, and it's the basis for my "religion" (I identify as pantheist). I can't quite explain what happened to make me have that moment of clarity, it was like something just clicked and everything just started to make sense, the more I started to think about it the more it made sense.
>Arioch?
Don't know who that is.
>dont mind me, im just want my (you)
Here (you) go.

woah woah woah, hold on. You telling me that you wouldn't want me todo everything for you and treat your right just because I am a male? I can make you a female, traps aren't gay. and you already watch anime ( I don't because it's a little fruity for my tastes).

seems like it's just you and me in this thread cutie.

>You telling me that you wouldn't want me todo everything for you and treat your right just because I am a male?
Well, I'm not gay. So, that's essentially it.
>I can make you a female, traps aren't gay.
Pic related
>and you already watch anime
Are you trying to say anime is gay? fite me
>seems like it's just you and me in this thread cutie.
That tends to happen around this time.

I'm lurking

>Mostly I just withdraw completely from everything around me. And just go into my own little world.
So how does it correspond to reality? Do you always recognize it as something separate?

since its just us, let me ask a few questions, how often do you go outside in a social environment? do you think you are submissive in a sense that you can't bring yourself to talk back to someone bigger than you? what religion are you? What do you do to cope with the voices in different situations. lets go my lovely cutie