Hey guys, maybe this isn't the place for this, but I'm just in a bad place right now and need... I don't know. Help? Advice?
I was a machinist's mate in the navy. In 2011 my ship deployed and during combat ops we had over 4000 confirmed kills.
It's been years since I left the service and I can't wash off the knowledge that I killed so many people. I can't stop thinking about it.
Some of them were Talibs and AQ, and they deserved to die. Others, I'll never know how many, we're innocent, and I killed them.
I just... I need someone to tell me how to fucking let go of the awful goddamn pain I feel all the time.
Dylan Green
Shit happens, get over it, these sandniggers would have died anyways
Joseph Allen
Dude. You were doing your job, for your country (no matter what the motives were, even if it is "war for oil", those shitskins do not deserve to have resources if they cannot protect them). End of the day, if it wasn't you, would have been somebody else. Don't hate the player, hate the game.
Adam White
To be honest, if you regret it that much I feel like it'd be plausible for you to be able to be forgiven by the ones you kill. You are suffering for your sins, you are paying that price, you deserve to be... Idk, okay now that you know right and wrong.
Jason Williams
True pain is not hidden in what we've done, but dwells openly in the fact that we acknowledge it was correct. - Vlad the Impaler.
Andrew Cook
This is bait But if it isn't You're a mm, you didn't kill anyone. Now get back to main1 and clean the bilge.
Sebastian Ross
That's like being a gunsmith and being sad about the people your gun may kill.
You aren't in the wrong, OP. You followed orders from the real wrong doers.
Cameron Flores
Do not think about it, you're building your pain and you deserve no empathy. They died, so? You're alive.
Logan Walker
>Better than nothing. Which is more than others can say.
Isaac Morris
Thanks man.
I know some of the people we killed trult deserved it. We saved American lives. But the enormity of so many deaths gnaws at me.
Go fuck yourself. You're probably a topsider faggot.
Bentley Perez
muslims aren't people.
If anything you should pick up a rifle (semi-auto) and start going to mosques.
Your job never ends even when the war is over, it isn't.
Jose Foster
This analogy makes no sense just so you know.
How fucking stupid are you all. Is reddit invading or something?
Mason Rodriguez
Yeah man, they died. Women and kids, and they're dead thanks to my actions and the actions of my superiors. If a daycare got blown up in Sacremento it would be a national tragedy, but when we blew away a house full of noncombatants in Jalalabad it's not even a blip on the radar.
Ryan Turner
>topside I was of course, why do you say that like it's a bad thing? You wish you were one buddy so don't pretend. Now tell me why you're acting like a fag you didn't kill anyone whatsoever. Btw what ship were you on. At least tell me the class.
Ian Young
>v4000 confirmed kills. the fuck you a navy seal?
Cameron Lopez
Youre probably a BM or a skittle.
You're just as culpable in the killing as me.
Or maybe you're Supply or a CS, in which case you're innocent but still a faggot.
Carter Brooks
You could an hero....faggot
Jackson White
This is my statement : I do NOT give a shit about these deaths, I do NOT blame men who did this, I KNOW my government DID the right thing even if kids and women died.
Evan Nelson
War. War never changes.
The Romans waged war to gather slaves and wealth. Spain built an empire from its lust for gold and territory. Hitler shaped a battered Germany into an economic superpower.
But war never changes.
Mason Wilson
>I can't stop thinking about it. good. go look at some pictures of dead kids, and kids crying in rubble looking for their parents.
Thanks for helping... what was it again? what critical mission involved you killing people over there again?
Christian Gray
Hotline Miami, Sharia Edition
Carson Evans
I'm guessing offshore artillery support. SEALs could only dream of those numbers.
Ayden Johnson
>I was a machinist's mate in the navy >I killed so many people Fucking lol.
Jackson Brooks
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 4000 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
Asher Thomas
>skittle Wtf is that? Is that some carrier shit? Instead of guessing twice why not just ask me? And why did you ignore what I said what ship were you on nigger? Neither of us are responsible at all. You work on engines nigger you're not a navy seal. Youre. It an FC or GM either. And even if you were so what. Finally someone in this thread with a brain. All these 18 year old Morons are killing me
Robert Diaz
I was on a CVN. An aircraft carrier.
It was during Gen. Mattis' big offensive into south afghanistan in 2011. Thought we would win the war with overwhelming force. Ended up just killing a lot of people and solving nothing.
Easton Torres
this, honestly
army fag here, 7 confirmed kills
you just gotta know that it was your job, and that if it wasnt you killing them then it would end up being someone else doing it
if you live by the sword, you will die by the sword, its just the name of the game
do i still remember those 7 people i killed every night before i go to sleep? yes
do i let it take over my life? hell no
John Wilson
What a loser. You killed absolutely 0 people. The pilots dropping bombs killed them. Stop being a fucking faggot.
Evan Russell
nah - you helped make sure that our side controls those precious opium fields
Gavin Scott
There were no people, especially innocent.
Hudson Turner
Shit that opened my eyes.
Carter Ross
Alright man.
Youre right. I didn't pull any triggers. Just got the ship on station, powered the cats, launched the planes...
Youre right I had nothing to do with any of those dead people. How silly of me.
Daniel Peterson
what did you think you were signing up for?
Colton Morales
what a load of bullshit
Julian Price
I seriously hope you kill yourself tonight.
Robert Rogers
You were masturbating and doing maintenance like a good drone....fucking dweeb you didn't kill a soul. save the PTSD drugs for the folks that need them and stop being a wuss
or just eat a shitton of soy and become a delicious trap.
Show me your butthole Sailor!
Elijah Edwards
kill niggers
Nicholas Ross
dont have to prove anything to you, faggot
Nathan Peterson
You're correct you didn't. By that same logic the cooks who fed the pilots and kept them alive are also guilty. There parents for fucking and giving birth to them are also guilty. See how stupid that is? I'm telling you you're innocent and yet you want to be guilty? Persecution complex?
Jayden Carter
trial research for mdma-assisted psychotherapy has shown much promise, extremely positive results. get some therapy and definitely get some drugs in ya mate.
Alexander Moore
Read the thread faggit he didn't do shit. He just needs an ass whoopin
Caleb Reed
Who's going to give it to me? You? Internet toughguy?
Cooper Gonzalez
>Thanks for helping... what was it again? what critical mission involved you killing people over there again? Who knows? But we accomplished the fuck out of it. In record time, too. And today, Afghanistan and Iraq are stable, prosperous Western democracies able to effectively combat terrorism.
Hudson Flores
kill black nigger babies
Lincoln Rodriguez
Athe Vlad the Impaler quote is real after his torture and decimation of the Ottomans - when his people, my people -began to question what they had done. >Not everyone is a neckbeard. >Stop projecting your life onto others. >Not everyone has the luxury of being a wonderful boy in england.
Levi Bennett
how the fuck arent you scared of him dude
Zachary Sullivan
Alright I can see this was a waste of everyone's time.
Ya'll take it easy. You can call this bait or whatever. I'll handle things some other way.
Sebastian Roberts
No one said it isn't real. I said it's faggy yo posts it as if it relates to this poser whatsoever. He's a mechanic. Not a navy seal.
Nigger you're on b at 5 am crying about how you 3rd hand murdered some sand niggers. I think my grandma could beat you up.
Oliver Diaz
Let me say it in stupid, so you can understand. It isn't the war, it's the depths of horror we see and help create. This is the real monster. There is no unseeing it.
Easton Hall
Those people were going to die because of that boat's combat ops whether or not you were on it, OP.
Just think about some of the lives you saved by taking out the enemy. You probably saved a lot of women and children.
Go talk to someone. Someone who isn't Sup Forums. They can help you. I promise.
John Brown
Let me say it in stupid for you. You didn't see anything from the engine room of a carrier you poser. I know it and so do you.
Xavier Long
I've been to real war. So's he.
The. End.
Nathan Howard
Yo OP let me just say it Ina non-poetic, non-balkan sense.
Takes time, man
A long time.
But it's cool, you were right.
Nicholas Murphy
Talk to a therapist. Ideally a non-VA one if you can get your insurance to pay for it. VA if you must. There are various pharmacological and non-pharmacological treatments available.
Joshua Reed
saved as new copypasta!
Easton Smith
4000 confirmed ... so much bullshit. Piss off nigger
Dylan Young
Were*
Isaac Wright
...
Easton Collins
I was a medic in the Army. I deployed several times overseas, and was personally responsible for the deaths of the people that I was unable to save in the field. I may not have been the person who put the shrapnel or bullet in the person I was trying to save, but I was unable to save them and that's on me.
You were a machinist. If your machine failed, that's your fault. If you can't fix it, it's either your fault or your CO's for not being able to get the equipment you need to fix it. You aren't responsible for killing anyone, nor are you responsible for the deaths of any of person that died during your mission. You aren't blaming the onboard Chaplain for it, are you? Or the supply clerks? Or the cooks?
The people responsible for those deaths are the ones giving the orders and the ones firing the weapons.
Asher Stewart
The military relies on that sense of diffusion of responsibility to get people to participate in horrific enterprises. But, yes, he was responsible. So are you. So are the cooks, and the pencil-pushers. So are the civilians who supported the wars.
Parker Martin
Thanks again man. Za zadroviye.
I understand, but without me not one of those planes would have gotten off the deck. Without me and my guys there would have been no air support. I don't mean that in a hooah kind of way, just the truth.
So, in some way, we share responsibility for those deaths.
I'm going to get up out of here though. Drunkenly posting my fucking moral quandaries on Sup Forums is just a good way to invite ridicule and I should habe known better.
I could tell stories, legitimise my feelings, explain why I feel the way I do, tell people the shit I saw, but nobody would believe me. So fuck it.
I appreciate your candour though man. I'm gonna go sleep it off.
Charles Wood
Is it true? Watches at 0 $?
Jackson Long
yes it is, but the scam is when you pay 50 dollars shipping, and then some chinks get your CC# and you'll realize why this is a mistake a few weeks later ;)
Asher Hill
You're an idiot. If everyone's responsible than no ones responsible.
Justin Hughes
When I was brand new here I read this every time it got posted for a week or so, sometimes it changed to fit the thread better, but then I stopped reading it and just chuckled when I saw it. Haven't read it in years, until now. This shit is beautiful guys. Read it! It's awesome copypasta! It's easy to forget or just gloss over, like how you say "I love you" to your wife so much that you may not really mean it... Oh!!! Sorry!!! Forgot where I was and that most of you are 14, my bad! But really, read it again if you haven't in a while. Good shit right there. Good shit.
Michael Lee
Congratulations. You're exactly the kind of amoral automaton the military seeks to create.
I'm surprised you didn't go so far as to let the sailors who fired the artillery off the hook.
>Well, technically, it was the artillery round that killed those people, not the guy who fired it, r-r-right guise?
Eli Scott
By that reasoning, the only people who aren't responsible are paddy farmers in rural China.
The entire US government, all of her allies, all of her enemies, all of her allies enemies, every arms manufacturer, every civilian who has ever worked on any piece of military technology or equipment, and every civilian in every one of those countries is directly responsible for those deaths.
So, you're just as responsible as Joe Blow at the bar down the road. If that's what is giving you grief, I suggest you go down there and talk to him about it. The only way you're going to get over it is by talking to people.
Maybe you should look into a job in politics, try to change the system somehow. Maybe you can be the guy who changes things for the better.
Ryder Bailey
>directly responsible Indirectly, not directly. And yes, lots of people share a degree of responsibility.
Adam Anderson
Truth is, you'll never stop feeling it. It sucks, I know. It's a burden you have to live with. I know the feeling all too well. I don't think it ever goes away. You have to understand that what William Sherman said is truth, "War is hell." People that don't deserve to die will die in the midst of a war. Throughout the course of humankind one thing has stayed the same and never gone off course, and that's humans killing other humans. That's how it'll always be. You just have to live with knowing you did it for a greater good. The people you killed that deserved to die in the midst of war had a price, which is innocent lives by your hands. Our goal there? To stomp every shit sucking towel headed weasel killing for their god, our price? Money, our own lives, and innocent casualties. Their goal? To seek and destroy every God fearing American, most of which don't know how close they can get to it. Their price? Money, their own lives. They don't care if they kill innocent people, they just want death and destruction. In the end though we're not so different. It's part of the greater good.
>not that you'll read this anyways OP.
Josiah Sullivan
stop being a fuckin gfaggot. KILL. DEATH. MURDER. KILL.DEATH. MURDER
Brayden Gonzalez
I never said that. They would be guilty. Stop stretching why words and assuming things. Also I know you haven't been in the mil obviously cause pure just an 18 year old faggot, but if you had been you'd know their is no goal to create people like that. 99% of people in the mil are average joes who need a pay check. They get in and get old and that's that.
Logan Reed
Yes, justify the collateral with feeble explanations of it being because "there were scumbags amidst the innocent", "I was simply following orders" or "it was in the country's best interest".
Especially those of you actually trying to justify killing of civilians based on nothing but your sheltered bigotry. "They're sandniggers, what does it matter?".
Little do you know with each attempt at rationalizing what can only be described as murder is only bringing you closer to becoming the muslim extremists you supposedly hate so much. Extremists of any cause resemble eachother moreso than they do anyone else in society, including you. That you fail to realize your how you are slowly but surely becoming the monsters you claim to hate so much only displays the level of ignorance and delusion that you little faggots shield yourselves from objectivity and reason with. So no, you are no better than "sand nigger terrorists". You are just like them, especially in reasoning.
With that being said, I know this notion is beyond your comprehension and admitting it means you would have to acknowledge your ignorance and wrongs. But selfreflection is a trait you belligerent pinheads uniformly lack and it shows.
But keep on believing yourselves to be infallible. The mark of the fool is the inability to handle conflict with any response but violence.
Oh and before you crack your box of buzzwords open, know there is a stark difference between being defensive and outright warring. Oh and reply all you want. I'm not gonna stay in a foolish attempt at excusing yourselves of the guilt. Your minds are already closed to any opinion or reasoning remotely foreign to your barbaric feudal worldview, so I know trying to actually reason with you would only be a waste of time.
You fanatics are every bit as disgusting as terrorists. And you won't see it until it's too late. Good luck with the dmt trip on your deathbeds, you pitifully pathetic examples of human beings.
Isaac Butler
>To stomp every shit sucking towel headed weasel killing for their god, our price It worked great!
Noah Young
The only one talking about "sand niggers" is you.
Read what the guy said. He obviously feels conflicted about what he did, even if his part in it was smaller than he realizes.
Nathaniel Ortiz
So you're saying that you're not the way you are as the result of indoctrination, just that your parents failed to give you an appropriate moral foundation, and your schooling failed to give you an adequate intellectual foundation.
Understood.
Henry Rodriguez
While I'm not defending the user you're bickering with, your argument about needing pay is silly. There's many jobs to do at home and if you're joining the military simply for pay then you deserve no remorse.
It's a honor to serve your country and protect your loved ones. You join to defend your rights and the rights of your fellow citizens, even if it doesn't work out that way in reality it's still why you should join.
Jaxon Fisher
protecting from what nigger
David Peterson
>Others, I'll never know how many, we're innocent, and I killed them.
there are no innocent muslims, kill them all
Samuel Gutierrez
What are you trying to say? I joined for the sake of the gi bill. Now I'm In uni for free getting my degree. I'd call that a smart plan. You wanna call em morally bankrupt be my guest. Enjoy you're debt wagie.
You're 100% wrong clearly you've never been anywhere near the mil. All that saving private Ryan nonsense is for the movies kid. No one irl thinks that way. Even in the kill jobs. Every infantry and SOF guy I've met said they joined to blow shit up and kill people. Being a patriot had nothing to do with it whatsoever. That's the shit they put into commercials to give morons like you a warm fussy feeing that doesn't exist. The military is a tool you can use to get what you want out of it.
Robert Torres
>you're 100% wrong
Thanks, random stranger who somehow knows my entire family history. I won't really give a shit about what you have to think though, sounds like you're a cynical fuck.
Leo Wood
>Enjoy you're debt wagie. >you're There was really no more perfect way for you to cap your ignorant ranting. Thank you.
Evan Fisher
I didn't say I know anything about you I said that statement you made was 100% wrong. You wanna prove me wrong then how about you grow some balls and go join?
>grammar error >haha got em Nigger I'm posting from my phone it autocorrected to that so calm your autism. Also notice how you didn't try to disprove my point? That's called deflecting. Again enjoy your debt.
Jayden Watson
You had no point. You can't even follow a simple conversation. Enjoy "you're" "university education."
Dominic Bennett
>I didn't say I know anything about you >YOU KNOW NOTHING OF THE MILITARY GO JOIN
Top kek. What I do know about you is that misery loves company and you'll spend your days being grumpy and cynical, wishing others knew as much as you think you do about life and growing more miserable from it, which in turn will alienate those around you as you try to plant a seed of misery into them as well. Thusly you'll be surrounded by equally cynical fucks agreeing with each other that the world sucks and nothing is sunshine and roses until you die, or you'll just die alone.
Ryan Bailey
I will. Especially cause it's free.
What misery? I'm arguing with 2 idiots from the comfort of my own bed. Whose miserable? I'm getting a great education for free and I loved being in the military and it was the best decision of my life to join after high school. Not really sure where you got any of that shitposting from.
Christian Wilson
You're a fucking moron. Is a mechanic or auto plant worker responsible for the actions of a drunk driver? Is a gunsmith or firearms manufacturer responsible for deaths resulting from guns they built? He was a machinist - saying he's responsible for those deaths he had no direct part in is just as stupid, you mung. He fixed shit, cleaned shit up. He didn't directly do anything - no pushing buttons, no launching missiles, no ordering strikes. How fucking stupid do you have to be to not understand the analogy?
Dominic Bell
This user has his priorities straight
Mason Watson
Calm your autism. I think based on this post that I agree with you. Are you saying Op is innocent? Cause that's what I'm saying. I was confused because in your original post you said he followed orders from the real wrong doers. As if you are alleviating his guilt. I'm saying however he has no guilt whatsoever and shouldn't feel bad at all.
Evan Garcia
Go away summerfag
Carson Young
Whoever kills sandniggers is a saint
Ryder Moore
Ok so we're in agreement.
Ryder James
That shit is so messed up, I mean don't get me wrong I like that white males rule the world basically but fuck..
Yeah I'm sure you feel like shit OP Just maybe get some pro pts help or something
What the fuck is actually up with people goddamnit I hate humans as a species, so selfdestructive and shit
Matthew Brooks
>white You mean Jews. That's not actually a joke Jews are easily more powerful and wealthy than whites.
Tyler Hall
>You're correct you didn't. By that same logic the cooks who fed the pilots and kept them alive are also guilty. they are. you're part of a machine.
Landon Reyes
>Is a mechanic or auto plant worker responsible for the actions of a drunk driver? Poor analogy.
>Is a gunsmith or firearms manufacturer responsible for deaths resulting from guns they built? Slightly better than the previous analogy, but still not really applicable to OP's situation.
You're kinda stupid. You might want to sit this one out, unless you want to keep demonstrating your intellectual deficiencies.
Charles Johnson
This "machine" you're imagining doesn't exist. I know you want to think it does but it doesn't.
John Powell
If this is true, just remember, there were more innocent lives saved than there got killed by that, the innocent ones were just unlucky, wrong place, wrong time.
Isaiah Wright
>This "machine" you're imagining doesn't exist. I know you want to think it does but it doesn't. I know it does, but you don't like to think so because it lets you sleep at night.
t.C2BMC
Dominic Gutierrez
You're genuinely retarded, aren't you?
Samuel Lee
Then by extension you're guilty too by paying taxes that funded the operation if you want to play that game.