Posted this on reddit. Thought you guys might be slightly more autistic and have better advice. So copy pasta:

Posted this on reddit. Thought you guys might be slightly more autistic and have better advice. So copy pasta:

Ex and I fell in love with each other in university and thought we were made for each other. Her more than I. She was extroverted and far better looking than my introverted self (important later). As the relationship progressed we realized we had tremendous differences in expectations and goals. My problem was that I came from a conservative and religious family and wanted to control her. She often clinged onto non-issues because she needed to 'win' arguments. But we developed a in-it to win-it attitude and worked on our relationship.

The last 3 years of our relationship were long distance (jobs in different cities). And as it is common with those types of relationships, it took a toll on our relationship. More fights than lovey dovey moments. We broke up often but always got back together with promises and reconciliation plans.

Then she started slowly falling out of love. I got less attention. Text replies became infrequent and she prioritized me last (after work, friends, alone-time etc.). During this phase I was in a tough job situation and had to work in a remote site with almost no social interaction and frustrating work. So I became even more dependent on her and my personality deteriorated. Then less she gave me the more I wanted it. Obviously in my gut I knew our relationship was declining.

Last June it finally came down to another one of our arguments. I could feel she wanted it. She broke up. It was different. This was it. I tried reaching out as one of us always did. She wasn't interested in getting back together.

After our break up I changed careers and got my dream job in a large city. My social life is excellent. I've had time to reflect and I have changed. I am an atheist now. All the major issues I had with her are not issues for me anymore. Credit to my new roommate who after many discussions changed my point of view on things.

In the meanwhile I kept in touch with me ex. We wish each other Happy Birthdays and Merry Christmas and are general on friendly terms. Recently I talked to my ex again (after 8 months) and told her I have changed. I told her we should restart our relationship but she said no. I was devastated. She isn't dating anyone or interested in anyone (she said so).

But I can't stop obsessing over her. I think about her everyday. I check her social media (public) and feel jealous of the people who hang out with her. I keep playing in my head if I had changed in time maybe our relationship would have worked. I feel like if she gave me a chance now she'd love the new and improved me.

On advice of my roommate I've gone on dates with other girls. But I never feel interested in them. I don't think any of them are even remotely as good as my ex. I'm still deeply in love. It's been a year this June since we broke up. I don't know if I will ever get over her. It's unhealthy how emotionally invested I still am in this. I was told it would fade away with time but it hasn't, at all.

I've read the general advice on breakups online but I feel like I have developed an addiction her. Thinking of romantic scenarios with the both of us. Vacations. Kids. Its pathetic.

tl;dr: Ex and I had differences. We broke up. I feel differences are gone and wanted to get back together. She said no. Can't stop obsessing over her. It's become unhealthy.

Also Sup Forums exclusive info: I fap to her pics everyday

show us pics please

Pics or we aren't helping

...

...

Gayyy

Roll for 88888888

Take my advice or leave it, the best way to get over an old lover is a new one. Also realize that we could copy/paste this into google and easily find the reddit post, so don't go off posting her pics if you don't want everyone knowing you did that.

I'm not sure what is worse. One sided love or lost love.

Too long didn't read

Also
>Getting dating advice from Sup Forums
Why?

Desperate

So he is doxxed now?

I've been in a similar situation like yours. And trust me on my word, it WILL wear off. I was desperate like you, went to therapy, but eventually you'll feel happiness again and you won't miss a thing and go on with your life.

What changed? How did you get there?

Like you, changing careers, doing what really made me happy. At first I noticed I really wanted to improve to show this to my ex and convince her to get back together. But the 'hanging on' to my ex made me really desperate. So I started working out, going out meeting new people. I started to be more happy when I was on my own. And eventually you'll feel much better, the thoughts go away and the heavy feelings aswell.. ITs been 8 months for you know, thats far too short.. It took me atleast 1,5 years on a relationship from 4 years. This was the first real relationship, I heard this is the worst.

>this so much
Work on your life bro, try to make your outward life/self reflect what it's like on the inside and the rest will sort itself out.
>if she doesn't want you, fuck her
>she'll either come around eventually or you'll get over it and find someone else
>stop stressing nigger

I was in a very similiar situation myself op, not as long term as yours but still, same shit nigger. Everything on advice on google is all normie shit for normies, i know what its like to be obsessed. The best thing you can do is literally force yourself to stop stalking her. It's a necessity for your mental health. It gets hard at times but if you keep at it and just force yourself not to check on her you will start forgetting her. You will find someone else, only reason you aren't enjoying other girls company is because you are thinking about your ex way too much. This comes from personal experience by the way, I used to stalk my ex in person, not on social media. But over time you'll forget her but ONLY if you stop checking on her. A good substitute that worked for me is this: find someone you think is a 10/10 and would love to date. Stalk them for a while like you do your ex, fap to them, etc. you'll see how ridiculous it is when you come to your damn senses.

Thanks user. You made me feel better.

>She isn't dating anyone or interested in anyone (she said so).
Not gonna lie, it's pretty damn adorable that you think that's true.

Protip: that's what girls say when they don't want to hurt you. So, hey, at least she doesn't hate you and want to hurt you. But if you seriously think that she's not getting her plumbing gummed up every night by Dick McThickropes, you're naive enough...well, to be the kind of guy who does long-distance relationships.

Honestly if she started dating someone publicly maybe it would be better. It would kill my hope of getting back together. Maybe it would hurt more. Maybe that would help getting over her quicker.

Everything you feel is a choice OP. If every time she pops into your head you distract yourself totally with your surroundings, and I mean every sound, sight and sensation currently hitting you, then you'll soon realise that thoughts about her leave your head just as easily as they enter

>Posted this on reddit.
2/10 bait for making me reply

Thanks for that, now I have an idea of how long it will take. My 4-year relationship - the longest I've had - ended in February and I still love her.

This. So much this. It works, seconded.

>3 years of long distance

Yeah I really dunno why people do that to themselves. I mean, a year sure, shit happens but 3? Unless you're in your 30's what's the point when you can just go and be with someone else who's actually there in person?

Agreed. Why do you think she was more distant than usual before the last break-up?

Maybe she met him at work, school wherever and hopefully she wasn't cheating but you can be damn well sure she was thinking about it. Girls like to monkey bar from one relationship to the next and she was probably in his bed that very night.

This is why you two stopped talking so much and didn't get back together like the previous times. He's been hitting it so well she's never looked back.

Get over it and move on.

This. Right in the feels man.

OP ... are you me?

Delete the pictures OP. Stop fapping to her and stalking her. Don't find videos on pornhub similar to her.

I did a similar thing with my last ex, under similar circumstances. Only, my ex was actually crazy. I mean, she stabbed me for trying to cut her off the booze one night, kind of crazy.

Realize the relationship is toxic. Find whatever reason to justify that. I'd argue the fact that you're obsessed and stalking her is enough justification that it was toxic. I'm sure there's more reasons though.

Once you realize the relationship is bad for you, it makes it easier to get over her. Make yourself fap to other women. You'll start wanting to be with other women.