Hey Sup Forums, where do I hide my dildo?

Hey Sup Forums, where do I hide my dildo?

>inb4 "in your ass"

Depends who you're tryna hide it from.

If you're willing to spend about 30 dollars you can get a small safe the size of a box, that's what I did for my sex toys.

Otherwise maybe at the back of your closet, in a locked drawer or something like it.

Safe is definitively safest option tho

in your underwear drawer like everyone else

in your ass

who are you hiding it from?

roommate. we are both guys and both straight. been friends since kids.

>both straight

totally.

Why hide it? Why should he care?

Out in the open... after they see them then don't return.

In my ass

In my ass

this tbh

How big is it? I just bought one and have been keeping it in the back of my closet when not in use

In your mom's ass

hide it?

what are you some kind of a pussy.

flaunt it man. who doesn't own a dildo nowadays anyway

ah. in that case the underwear drawer should suffice. he has no business in there anyway, and if he does go in there, he's got some 'splainin to do.

good point user

in your room mate's ass then. he would never suspect anything

in my ass

>
>
>in your ass

Bad idea that's the first place they'll look . try someone else's ass.

yeah because youre defenitely gonna shake him off by asking what he's doing in ur underwear drawer, if there is a 30cm big ass black dildo that smells like unwashed ass in there... he might be checking all ur drawers in case he lost something or looks for one of his underwear that might have gotten lost in ur drawer or whatever. especially if you know him for a long time, its not thát weird to look through his drawers if ur looking for something. having a big ass fucking dildo that u ride every night silent but passionately ís weird though.

do you have seperate rooms?

too poor for a 2 bedroom flat. new york city.

Just buy a strapon and wear it all the time.

So a shared room then? Hmm I lack the creativity to think of a safe place for it. Some other user mentioned a cheap safe, that would be a good option and it's reasonable to have one.
If you are lucky enough to have a roommate who respects your privacy and doesn't have a history of snooping through your drawers then the underwear drawer another user mentioned would work totally fine

You don't even need a safe. Get one of the small two-drawer filing cabinets with a lock. It would be far less suspicious than a safe. And you'd have a place to store your important documents.

i dunno about you, but i have boundaries with MY roommate. even if by some chance his laundry did get mixed up in mine, 1 i would know it wasnt mine before i put it away, and 2 he would ASK before snooping. you need better roommates if yours just look through your stuff without asking

Behind the vents of your bedroom.

not everyone has vents like this user

i do, but in the ceiling

your roommate is an asshole if he does this
you should kick him out
people should respect privacy

Tape it to the ceiling how often do people look at the roof

this tho pre good idea

all the more reason thats not gonna work.

It's about 14 inches long. anything smaller than that I can't even feel tbh.

I started hooking up with shemales on craigslist and some of them had some huge dicks, but I got banned for trying to buy children in the vancouver area, so now i use a dildo.

In a suitcase.

fuck it guys, putting it in my computer case.

...

>but i got banned for trying to buy children
wtf man?

Stick it to the top of a ceiling fan blade. No one will look there.

It's gonna melt.

Liquid cooling loop

Bottom drawer is dedicated to my dildos and other toys. I keep my Glock in there too. So if any kids go looking they will hopefully just back away immediately.

>this is my rifle, this is my gun

What if the little retards wanted to play star wars?