Alright Sup Forums, roast my smug mug and be as savage as fucking possible. I need a good chuckle

Alright Sup Forums, roast my smug mug and be as savage as fucking possible. I need a good chuckle.

Go ahead and take the kid's gloves off, I'm ready for full on hurtful roasts.

when was the last time you saw your penis?

Bout 5 minutes ago in the shower.

If this is as savage as it gets then I'm sprely disappointed Sup Forums.

When and what was last supper?

Teriyaki beef stir fry over steamed rice.

Nigger you look like you already had a good roast recently.

Seriously Sup Forums step your game up.

More like i need a good roast, all these fucking salads are going right through me!

Damn I'm starting to get triggered by the sheer tameness of these posts

Give me a minute to think of something.

I'm waiting nigga.

Come on Sup Forums, I've seen edgy kids on that are more savage then you

Did i forget to mention I support Trump?

I guess Sup Forums lost its edge for roasting a straight white male who voted and supports Trump.

Suck trumps cock!

All this weakness is putting me to slerp

You are so fucking autistic that you couldnt figure out how to rotate that picture of some fat fuck you pulled off google

Check the date numbnuts, that IS my face.

You're just another fat guy on Sup Forums. Nothing special or out of ordinary. Frankly you are too basic to roast. Go work out if you have this much free time to spam refresh on this terrible thread.

Dickfart.

Nigga it's 1 AM.

This is just pathetic.

post dick

Don't get him laughing too her guys, don't want that second chin to jiggle so hard it throws the earth off orbit

Your face? I thought that was a fat shovel with down syndrome.

That got a smile user
Oh we got a pro here! This should be good.

Glad ididnt make you laugh op. Wouldn't want to speed up global warming by locking us closer to the sun

I guess Sup Forums really is full of mealy mouthed cucks with no balls. Probably explains why everyone posts women getting BLACKED.
Look on the bright side, with higher oceans you'd probably have beachfront property

For real though, OOPS? Why does your nose look like a bird beak and your eyebrows look like one of those li ed birds pekple draw as kids when they can't draw that's just an "m"? Is your pic side ways cause you've fallen and can't get up? Was that Georgia earthquake You?

Wow new phone with terrible autocorrect. Not even gonna try and fix this just figure this shit out yourself OP

Are you cracking that smile cause you finally saw your first side boob or because you finally touched your sister in her sleep?

The fact that it's that bad is kekworthy enough.

No I'm just a smug cunt by nature.

Or is it because in the midst of your fall you just barely saw the tip of your dick for the first time I'm in your life?

See above

Can you show me the way of the sword OP senpai?

gun in mouth, brains on ceiling, body not discovered until the stench becomes unbearable, corpse cremated by the state because no one cared enough to claim it, ashes tossed into a dumpster / 10

Are your eyes dark because you're tired or because your dad beats you because you won't move out of his basement?

Damn i didn't know i was that drop dead sexy user, you just made me blush

you're a grammatical retard

Lack of sleep. I spent my nights writing.

>you just made me blush

you know that doesn't count as sex right...you are still a virgin

Please user, buy me a drink first. I'm not that kind of girl.

How is he a retard?

Writing your screen play so you can hit it big OP? Who do you have playing You? Tom cruise?

More like a series set in the 1920's about a young detective wanting to take down a ruthless mob boss who murdered his family.

How original

Entertainment isn't supposed to be original. It's about telling the same tropes over and over again. Good beats evil. Things happen for a reason.

Besides, a show set during Prohibition umong a market saturated with capeshit is pretty unique

You look like you masturbate to tentacle porn and live in a basement

You do know you just described Sup Forums in a nutshell right?

You look like a retarded version of that fat cop in heroes who

Weird, i was always told i look like Jack Black who's career hit rock bottom.

You look like you scribbled a fake mustache and cool guy soul patch combo with a pen

It's natural, it's just been growing back shorter and shorter every time i shave.

Are you a virgin op?

Your face is so fat the .jpg tipped over

No, but i am tired.

Op let me guess you have insomnia

No shit.

How many white vans and bags of candy do you own?

You can't sleep so because your life sucks and you have nothing to get up for tomorrow's anyways. You didn't stay up late on a Friday to go out with friends or socialize because you have no friends. You have no girlfriend. No real reason to stay up late other than posting on fucking Sup Forums like every other loser.

Zero and zero.

But explain why you're posting this late user.

you look like if you didnt have computer skills you'd be a lot fatter.

That's a phone picture user.

Can't sleep. "Insomnia"

Sir may I say that I am glad that you are alive
Because no matter how said or depressed I am I can always say "at least I'm not that sad fat fuck I saw on Sup Forums"

You're tubby

Also who shit on your face and forced you to call it facial "hair"

You look like a domestic violence victim

Also, I don't go out because i find people irl as assholes due to being cynical bastard.
Glad i could cheer you up fam.

The only thing beating my ass is life.

You appear to be slightly overweight and should feel bad about that because you let your body reach an unhealthy weight through what one can assume to be a lazy routine and unhealthy diet. For shame tubbers

Your one of those motherfuckers who thinks they are smarter than everyone because your lonely and spend all your time on the internet

This put a smile on my face.

Jesus Christ somebody get this faggot a violin

Seriously it looks like someone is beating you. How is your home life?

No i just generally hate people. Including myself. So getting roasted helps me feel humble and reminds me I'm just as shitty as everyone else.

Relax it's just sleep deprivation.

If i wanted condescending I'd go to church on Sundays

Why do you hate people? Because they are not fat and depressing and they don't throw pity parties for you?

How many twinkies did you eat today? How many cans of boyardee?

No, I'm just not a people person. Besides, I'm technically not racist if i hate everyone right?

You're fat

Zero and zero. I actually hate Twinkies.

The fact that you had to clarify that makes me feel like you are a racist. Plus you've said nigger a few times so I'm guessing you are an racist

Am writer. Don't look like santa Claus's retarded elfs face fucked a magical tub of I can't believe its not butter. Also don't look like I cut my dick out of repressed tard rage for being beaten by mommy when she caught you touching yourself with her good eyebrow plucking tweasers. Go supersize another diet Coke you fat cunt and do everyone a favor and wheel your fat ass off a bridge. America is diabetic enough with out the Pillsbury dough boys chunk uncle trying to slide his greased ass into last year's speedo

And you suck at insults.

So now we got a fat, depressed, fuckin sleep deprived possible child molester AND he's a racist. And you wonder why your lonely and have a shitty life.

Don't be sanctimonious, you've probably said nigger countless times too.

Cuck 10/10 totally ignored the ripe ass rek last posted

Suck a nigger dick that word is racism incarnate

It's so incoherent that i couldn't stop laughing

Must be ADHD as fuck to follow. No regrets it's like a secret language at this point

Hey no need to be slangin big words that I don't understand around. We get it your way more clever than the rest of us. Even though you probably had to check your spelling on google, faggot.

>Am writer. Don't look like santa Claus's retarded elfs face fucked a magical tub of I can't believe its not butter. Also don't look like I cut my dick out of repressed tard rage for being beaten by mommy when she caught you touching yourself with her good eyebrow plucking tweasers. Go supersize another diet Coke you fat cunt and do everyone a favor and wheel your fat ass off a bridge. America is diabetic enough with out the Pillsbury dough boys chunk uncle trying to slide his greased ass into last year's speedo

Holy fuck, can i save this as pasta?!

I'm not sure if you're a skinny Hawaiian or a fat Mexican bitch with drawn on eyebrows.
You look like that one Mexican bitch who said she looked the Mona Lisa get the fuck off my website you degenerate piece of shit how's it feel yo know that the only time you get any semblance of attention is from random people on the internet whose sole purposed for talking to you is to roast you in a shitty excuse for attention you fat fuck