How do I stop this from happening?

How do I stop this from happening?

Don't pee while seated.

chop yo dick off whiteboi it aint for no good either shieet

Aim down you peasant.

I don't always but when i do this happens

I try but it just doesn't workout

push your dickhead down with your thumb so it is aimed at the water/edge of the bowl. Works for me

KEK

God gave you a dick for two reasons: So you could fuck bitches and aim your piss
Now we all know you're not gonna be doing one of those, so at least try to be a bit more proficient at the other.

>doesn't pee while pooping sometimes at the same time

My thighs are to thick for that and when i try to hold my dick between my thighs i piss all over myself

I take a small wad of toilet paper and put it by the head of my penis to absorb the urine

I piss standing all the time. I like sitting from time to time. Its nice

start pissing in the shower

lose weight and your D will dangle

I do. I like that too

God exists~?! :o

you can not be serious?

I trying that now. I havent had a soda in three days. Only water. Small changes

Im overweight but im working on it

You fucking better, user.

you need to talk to your doctor about having a larger penis. It should hang down when you're seated.

I started my diet three days ago

Thats why im losing weight

>Sitting down while pissing
What are you, fucking gay?

I call bs. Prove with pic and timestamp!

Hate to tell you but you basically just admitted to having a small dick.

Nice grammar

I can't sit down on the toilet after sex because my erection get stuck so I need to pee in the shower. Try that op.

same with all of us

I'm an obesity and small penis specialist at New York Presbyterian. Often I see you males with large fat pads below the waste and above the penis and this is accompanied by a small penis which when seated forces the urine stream to be expelled over the toilet seat and parallel with the floor. I have found the following two solutions, upon proper diagnoses to be effective: 1. Fat pad reduction using lipo suction, most patients find immediate relief and also better sexual performance 2. Defecating while standing up. The second solution solves one problem but creates another. You hit the toilet with your piss but you shit all over the floor. So I'd rather have piss than shit on my bathroom floor.

When you take a shit, do you piss standing up then sit down and take a shit? What are you, a fucking idiot?

>after sex

I'm generally not hard if we just finished