If you're gonna travel through middle earth, why not take a more scenic route?

If you're gonna travel through middle earth, why not take a more scenic route?

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I genuinely can't stand shit posting. I really can't. It's the most autistic, pointless thing a person could actually find "entertaining". The idea that you think it's hilarious wasting hours of your "life" trying to bait people into replying to your shitty half arsed posts speak numbers about how lonely and pathetic you must be to get entertained doing this

It probably seems counter productive for me to write this, because shit posting genuinely makes me angry. It seems like it's near impossible to have a genuine discussion on this board without some fuckwit chiming in to say something stupid like "freshcunt" or "newcunt fresh off the boat from facebook or reddit detected".

I know that this will probably get a bunch of you stupid cunts replying to me calling me the "autistic" one for actually speaking up, because I genuinely want to have a discussion about something instead of being barraged with retarded responses that will no doubt have me reply to you about your stupid pointless comments.

Moderation is largely pointless because you all seem to use dynamic ips anyway so no matter what you'll continue your shit posting like it's some normal part of your everyday life.

The fact that anyone ever calls you out on your bullshit and you try and defend it, or continue replying in a shit posting fashion is childish as fuck considering most of you on here are at least 18-30 years old.

Fuck all your shit posting antics. Kill yourselves. You're not funny, or witty, or original, or entertaining. You're literally all rehashes of one another trying to be unique and funny, when you're all doing the same thing. Your pathetic "lives" while you sit here day in and day out shit posting are being wasted away because you find it hiIarious to get people worked up 24/7. It's like you cunts are addicted to shit posting. Like you get a dopamine response from it or something.

Rant over cunts. Fuck off.

Why didn't they just call a taxi?

time was of the essence my lad

>Morgoth will never make you watch your son fuck his sister.

Time my ass. They pissed about enough on the canon route.

The first age shit is dark as fuck man

if they used horses it would be even faster. niggers just hoofed it for absolutely no good reason.

Here is what they should have done

>you will never see beleriand

It's shit tacos if you're a human in the first age.
>born during war
>live during war
>die during war

Your fault for not being born of the house of Finwe

I'd rather see the rest of Mordor desu. Geographically, it's a pretty big place, and the whole area can't just be ash and fire. They're probably some really interesting lore in Mordor.

>Being born just in time for the battle of unnumbered tears.

And yet, I hope they never make a movie out of it, because I feel it would ruin my imagination of it. I know, it's a land like any other, and there is every reason to believe it looks similar as third-age middle earth, but in my mind, the first age grass green is deeper, darker, without necessarily being bleaker. The elven cities and strongholds are pure and clear, big blocks of white stones, shining pearls in a sea of untouched wilderness. I feel like they would have to complicate it with a movie, like the shit they made to Lake Town.

>They're probably some really interesting lore in Mordor.
None that became canon.. At some point you have the sea of nurn, which isn't ashen and stuff, basically it's Mordor's granary, ploughed by orcs and human slaves from the East. Then you have the eastern human kingdoms, whose ancestors never went west in the first age.

Go to bed turin

The entire first age is one cluster fuck of depressing shit.

Are you seriously suggesting they should have taken the ring through Angmar?

>seriously suggesting
>seriously
>Sup Forums

I wish Tolkien expanded more on Mordor and what was actually in Mordor.

There's so much mystery surrounding it.

>tfw Morgoth sacks your city that's been around for hundreds of years.

there's a volcano and orcs and nothing else
happy?

Why not? The Witch King wasn't even in Amgmar at this point. He was likely down in Mordor consulting with Sauron on how to find his ring.

>You will never live in First Age Dwarrowdelf
>You will never have a comfy job mining Moria Silver
>You will never go to the Inn after a long day's work and drink ale with your bros and come home to your beautiful Dwarven family

Why go on?

>Moria Silver

Mithril

But it's a massive area on the map. If Middle Earth was Planet Earth, Mordor would be like the entire north American continent in terms of its relative size. It's a big place.

Just let me use my hipster terms faggot I want to sound cool.

believe it or not mordor had also fertile lands near its inner sea, Aragorn gave it to the people that lived in Mordor as slaves to Sauron.

Also the orcs and other creatures turned into little garden animals.

fuuuuuuuuuuuck! Beleriand really got swallowed whole! Oh my god!
I never tought so much land got fucked.

Peter jackson cant do it.

It would have to be a new director with a big sense of literacy, A LOT OF IMAGINATION AND creativity. Some sort of James cameron, passionate AS FUCK for this. Like a fanboy himself.

Also I feel like it would work more as a mini series than as a movie, or perhaps just a story as a movie.

Which story would you adapt? I would like Beren and luthien.

ALSO OBLIGATORY!
youtube.com/watch?v=1AfNOKQdY-U

Children of Hurin would make sense as an adaptation because there is already a lot of stuff there to adapt from. I would like to see about Tuor and his line down to Earendil and the role he played in the War of Wrath.

Is that your own head canon? I don't think Tolkien every wrote anything post LOTR about his Universe.

>Wanting James Cameron to touch a single piece of Tolkien's work

Holy fuck, no. Just no. May as well ask Michael Mann to do it.

Well the part of the animals yes, because of the return of the king cartoon. The magic faded away from the world and so the magical creatures turned into simple garden animals.

youtube.com/watch?v=am-piARxy4U

I'd love to see a tragedy about Beren and Luthien. That seen in where the werewolf devourers each of the captives until Felegund breaks his chains and bites it to death.

Alright, I'll do it then instead.
Let me just finish my movie first I will show it on festivals and shit and if you like it then well rest assured I would do it.

>we'll never see a good adaptation of tales from the First Age
>at best we'll get a corny prostituted action-packed version with tons of pointless CGI and Hollywood cliches
>Tolkien works in film will never catch the tone and spirit of the original books
>we'll be pointed as fucking nerds for not endorsing Hollywood making shit movies in order to get easy money

They have excellent restaurants on at the sea of Nurn.

those are great