Why do people start to hate each other after getting married?

Why do people start to hate each other after getting married?

Because they marry too quickly without actually living together for more than a year.

You want to know the truth? It's because once women get married they know they get half your shit if you ever leave them because you literally signed a contract with them and the state agreeing to do so. They have you by the balls now. So they start to slack off. They let their bodies fall to shit, they get angrier, and they cut back on sex. Because they don't have to WORK to maintain the relationship anymore. I see this all the time with my friends. I don't feel sorry for them because they signed the contract agreeing to it.

This usually.
However, even my parents were together for 8 years before getting married and they still got divorced later on.
Mind you, they were still good friends and all afterwards, but didn't want to live in the same household.
They never told me and my brother why, so I can only assume it was because of us. Can anyone confirm that?

The newness of the relationship wears off and the couple get to see what they're really like. I lived with my gf for three years before getting married so we knew everything about each other and how we react to situations. I encourage everyone I know to live together for a while before thinking about getting married.

Because it's seen as the finish line.

Once you've crossed the line, you don't need to run anymore.

I resent my wife for getting a lot heavier, and her sexual enthusiasm plummeted.

I'm actually pretty fair, I didn't care when she gained some weight because I love her but she's almost going too far now.

It makes me hate her a bit because she doesn't consider how this is detrimental to me. She has sex with me often, but it's boring and she is no longer adventurous. I wanted a partner I could have wild sex with for years and try all kinds of stuff, not someone who shuts down a year after we got married.

Hahahah faggot. It was your fault.

Honeymoon phase is over

This. They let themselves go and show their true side

because they didnt spend enough time together to realize they have irreconcilable differences

yes you are correct
it was because of you

Familiarity breeds contempt. That's all there is to it.

I meant both, not just the women.

it probably wasn't tbh.
idk why people always blame themselves for these thngs.

People lie a lot here but Sup Forums is the only place where in a thread like this you have people telling the truth. I love this place.

because the idea of monogamy is an ideology not a natural law.

if we were meant to be with one partner for our whole life would we have to create laws and religious doctrine to enforce it?

no. how many laws do you have that remind you to breathe or grab something to eat?

I mean both too

Been living with the same girl for close to 10 years (not married). For me it's just too much togetherness; I grew up an only child and really really value my alone time. She's needy and constantly wants to do everything together

Also the sexual enthusiasm plummeted...every time we fuck (few times a month) she always says, "why don't we do that more often?!" and I'm looking at her like...because you don't ever fucking initiate it. She's a great person but most of the time I'd rather just jack off.

wtf is wrong with me Sup Forums?

because people are fake but you cant be fake forever

It's not so much about "hate". Women are the worst at getting married, having a kid or two, then packing on every pound they can and expecting the husband to just accept it. My wife did the same thing, while I've continued to work out regularly and eat healthy. The love is still there but the sex has been cut back by myself, not her. The physical attraction has to be there too just like it was in the beginning, most women forget that.

few times a month??????

Any LTR or marriage won't work out unless you really know your partner and they don't fuck around or "change"

This exactly
I'm a woman with a huge sex drive
Granted it's not "lets get this going" all the time, at least not to the same extent as my partner, but it's the type of person he is and what he does when he gets into the mood that actually puts me in that mood, even if it was not something I'd even considered doing that day at all
To keep a good sex life you have to think about your partner's needs and their feelings and have a very strong friendship and that will sustain passion and affection for each other long term in every way, especially sexually with them.
I understand his needs because I have very strong needs. And even if his are a bit more than mine I want to please him and give him satisfaction and that in itself is a turn on for me and brings me pleasure
Your strength of your relationship plays a huge part in the health of your sex life.
In the same way as you can tell a lot about a person from how they treat the waiter, you can tell how much your partner really does care for you in the way they treat you sexually over a long period of time

Not a god damn thing, man. I hate to say it, but a majority of this thread is correct. As much if a cliché as it is, women in long term just end up not giving a shit as much. Regardless as to how emotionally committed they may or may not be, their real time commitment slacks hard after a while.

Hey junior, we can't all be 16 years old forever. People grow up and have stressful, busy lives and their biggest concern is no longer which game to buy on Steam with mom's credit card.

Because as kids they're weak and dependent on their parents which makes kids so self centered that they blame shit they have no control over on their selves.

>then packing on every pound they can
is it really their laziness or perhaps just females tend to gain weigh as they age?

don't listen to the trolls. people don't start hating each other after marriage. people just live their lives like normal and if it seems like married couples are unhappy it's because sometimes people are unhappy. there's nothing more to it.

Most people do. You go from high school with a fast metabolism, to college where you have a bunch of free time to hit the gym...then you get into the working world and you're sitting down staring at a spreadsheet for 10 hours a day. No time to eat properly or exercise, so you grab a coke and a honey bun out of the machine and scurry back to your cubicle before Mr. Shekelstein notices you're gone.

That's how we all end up fat and doughy.

Men and women both gain weight as they age, so yes, it's their laziness.

Pretty much, marriage kinda traps people though

I'm in the same situation, but it's once every month and a half.

I am a good husband, but I'd rather just jack off. Sick of always initiating and chasing her and getting shot down. I don't even bother with physical affection anymore. She got what she wanted: kids, house nice cars. I got...uh. I love my kids a lot. It's nice having someone else around, but the romance is just gone. I feel like I am missing out on a lot. That's why midlife crisis happens, guys eventually say fuck this and do what they want. Happening to all my friends too. Middle age sucks.

Currently trying to avoid the marriage and kids trap. Fortunately she's not interested in either one so I can walk away whenever an it'll be easier.

But we've lived together for a decade...everything in our lives is extremely intertwined. She's a unicorn and not some roastie whore, but I can't help but "think with the wrong head" and want to fuck every other girl I see.

Them feels. It's happening to a lot of my friends now. This exact situation.

I know. I'm lucky if she wants it more than once a month.

I think birth control fucks with their hormones and makes them less horny.

I'd bye that for a dollar!

Do you think all marriages end up like this or was it just bad luck?

Has to do with change in mindset. Now all the little things you could tolerate before are things you are going to have to put up with FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. So much just has to do with perspective and attitude.

how about you just fucking TAKE it?

Because women become raging cunts when the men don't change into the person they want.

Shitting in a toilet, medicine, air conditioning, glasses, tv, computers, and more aren't natural either.
And actually, many species are monogamous. You're just a cuck.

couples that cohabitate before marriage are more likely to get divorced

tis true my friend, look it up

my guess is that religious ppl are less likely to live together before marriage and they are less likely to get divorced

Yep. This.

I wish I could be with someone with this attitude. My wife has said she'd be happy never gaving sex again. Thing is, I'm going to have sex. She decides if it's with her or someone else

Probably right. Or the cohabitating couples get an extra head start on "I've been putting up with your shit for years" that just compounds once they get married.

Girlfriend and I have been together for almost 10 years and everyone always asks, "OMG WHEN IS THE BIG DAY?" and sometimes it feels like we should just get married for the sake of easiness, but god I'm sick of her haha

You're the one saying it, provide the source.

Happens sometimes. A woman's sex drive diminishes once she is in a stable relationship.

Change routine a bit, go on a trip together, something really new.
Being a bit surprising or romancing her can help.

Biggest thing is change of routine, and making sex not feel like a necessity, but something to enjoy.
Saying that, I don't know what she could do to improve, often seems it is the man who has to take charge.
Be a bit more aggressive, start feeding her aphrodisiacs, slap her butt, tease her over a period of days.

Read about it, there are lots of articles.
If things don't improve in a few months, consider whether you want to continue.

Talk with her about it too, say you really enjoy sticking your peepee in her vagina, and that your like to try some new things.
Dripping hot wax on her tits while you pump into her anus, or filling all her holes with vibrators and leaving her tied to a chair for 8 hours while you go to a figure skating competition to take photos of the crotches of the women competing.

Mine's not on any. I had a vasectomy. They're just cunts

I see that scenario more times than not.

Tits, post them.

Men do those things but stop when they don't work. Women say they want the flirting and romance but they just want money and shelter

She's not here for attention. She's here to contribute to the thread. Tits would be nice but are not required in this situation.

Because humans are not naturally monogamous. The concept of human monogamy was born during the early stages of agricultural civilization, when it became necessary for men to be absolutely sure they were leaving their possessions to the correct person. This meant either having one wife or having several who ONLY procreated with you so that you were passing your work and meager possession on to a true-born son.

Same here. More and more every day I think, fuck this.

>mom got on dads case about pot, he left her, they were both happier after, he got killed by a car about 5 years later. worst day of my life.
>aunt left her husband after he was accused of looking at kids, dont blame her, he later killed him self
>other aunts husband got diagnosed with cancer, she decided she was gay, he died, he was a really cool dude
>uncle (other side of the family) ran off with his uncles wife...super weird at funerals
>me and wife have been together for 10 years, married almost 5, i cant wait to see how we break up.

Forget all the other 'explanations' here.
This is the truth. Pure and simple.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Dying laughing. Mine is too.

I was actually married before. No I'm not a troll, yes, I'm a fucking idiot for getting married. We got married for all the wrong reasons. We had a kid on the way and decided that the best way to raise it was as a single family unit. I was in the Army and the only way to make that happen is if we were legally bound.

She was a jealous and controlling idiot. We had almost nothing in common. Even her family backround was entirely different from mine.

Additionally, we were really young (20 and 19) when we got married and I felt that I had settled too early

Nope

So there is actually some truth to this. My ex COMPLETELY let herself go after one year of marriage and having a kid. She made no effort to improve herself. She did feel entitled to the money I earned. That honestly bothered me because she never bothered to tell me that she planned on dropping out of school and not working.

They want the money and shelter, but to keep them providing the milk - you can spark their excitement.
It sounds like a cosmopolitan magazine entry, demanding men to do everything as usual, but it can work.
You do different things, take her out on a date every week or two, something simple but separate from normal life.
A meal somewhere new, or something like that.

A guy on here explained it better a few years ago.

Men are turned on by the visual, a nice body, a flash of flesh, a lick of the lips.
Women are supposedly turned on by the romance part, the lead up - like a courting ritual.
So while a woman can turn a man on by wearing something revealing, or giving him a lap dance, or showing her ankle - a man must so the equivalent in order to heat her up, with things like taking charge, choosing a place to eat, giving her a massage or cooking a meal.
I don't really have the answers, but when the guy said it, it made sense.
Not guaranteed for every woman or every relationship, but I think making things less predictable and formulaic can keep women interested.

If you're gentle in bed, be a bit rough.
If you are rough often, be gentle and slow once in a while.
Tricks her brain.
Like people say about spicing up their sex-life or marriage, it takes effort but is worth it.
I think talking to the woman is a good first step, so it isn't all on you.

Of course she's here for attention.
She should post tits, then a 2 litre bottle of coke in her pooper.

You revisionists will excuse anything. Remember, there are no females on the internet. This can only be contradicted if tits are posted with a timestamp.

>That honestly bothered me because she never bothered to tell me that she planned on dropping out of school and not working.

Noting unusual. I was fooled by her advanced degree and career before we got married. Post marriage she found everything I thought she could do to be "too stressful" or too difficult.

I've been married almost 19 years and I still enjoy hanging out with my wife every time I get a chance.

Make sure you pick the right one.

I relate to you. Mine was a good student and held a job as well. After marriage she's quit every job and I'm stuck with 100%of the financial burden.

These are just bandaids. They work for a while but don't really address the issue of women being cunts. I'm guessing you aren't married and are just parroting some magazine bullshit.

>someone else's relationship ended
>so I can only assume it was because of us

How fucking arrogant can you get?

Wrong

Because marriage in the western world in the 21st century bares almost no resemblance to what it was intended to be or was in the past.

because mariage is not about love but money

You're a normal Man.

Because idiots make bad decisions.

Life is like one big LoL game. Everyone knows the basic idea, kill the Nexus, but no one has any idea how to make it happen. So instead of a victory, you get 45 minutes of assholes making bad decisions.

These are the same dipshits getting married to a female after 8 months then hating her 10 months later because she's a moron that can't cook, hold a job, ornaments conversation.

MGTOW.

>Why do people start to hate each other after getting married?

they don't. this only happened in your marriage genius. i'm willing to bet there is a nigger in the woodpile somewhere

I already said where the advice comes from, and that it sounds like it comes from cosmopolitan - but you are a thick blind cunt, so didn't bother to read.
It isn't patching up, it is machine maintenance. Needed for the lifetime of the parts.
Women are like children, you faggots that don't realise that they need constant input are doomed.
You shouldn't have listened to the equality memes.
.

Wrong.
I'm right.
She made a claim, now has to back it up. Otherwise it is just a faggot roleplaying and is worthless info.

Like me saying "hi I'm a neuroscientist and have 15 wives, this is how you solve all problems!".

But they don't. Only couples who weren't supposed to be together in the first place start to hate each other. Marriage is a lifelong process between two people. The only idea behind marriage is a promise between two people to stay together until both of them are dead. There's no point to get married in the first place if there's even slightest chance that they could breakup.

What's the point to waste all that money, energy and everything else for a promise that might be broken?! The only people who should get married are the people who are 110% sure that they are ready to make that promise and keep that promise. The marriage is basically a promise that includes ceremonies and traditions. Nothing more. And what's the point even making such promises that you know you can't keep in a tough situation.

You date someone because you find them appealing and interesting...a few years go by and you learn everything about that person, she no longer interests you and your "love " fades...

>this only happened in your marriage
But I was never married.

I'm the guy you asked, and almost every marriage I know or see is like this. The ones that aren't are 2nd marriages who already went through their divorces.

>The only people who should get married are the people who are 110% sure that they are ready

We are talking about human beings as a species here, right? Most people in our society have problems deciding between whether to eat chicken or steak for dinner and you expect them to be completely sure about marrying someone?

>Took advice from a guy

Why even bother commenting if you aren't going to read what the guy had to say?

Fucking die faggot.

>Because they don't have to WORK to maintain the relationship anymore.
A female acquaintance once told me it's because "We can now stop pretending". It's all just smoke and mirrors, straight from the whore's mouth.

No woman will ever love a man who willingly puts his balls in her purse.

Exactly. And that kind of people shouldn't ever make that promise (marriage). We waste all that money, time, energy... for a promise you know that you can't keep? The whole idea behind "promise" is that someone agrees to something and he/she is 100% certain that he/she can make it. In this case staying with another person until death. The whole idea and word promise becomes meaningless if people just break it when ever they want.

Do not promise things you can't keep. Simple as that.

Dont get married fellas lol. See the trap society leaves for you! Im 32. Never married. Just banged a 19 year old like a week ago. Then i banged my fuck buddy a day ago. Lol. Why would you get married? I can jack off when i want, i can shit with my bathroom door open, i can hit on any chick i want, and i dont ever have to go to her familys events lol. Marriage is for the pathetic that cannot think for themselves or are too afraid of being alone. Lol. Its really a sad site to see but makes me happy to know im not trapped.

Because marriage is an obsolete, unnatural, forced "institution" that began as a compromise in tribes that had the shittiest philosophies, and just got worse and worse for thousands of years until it was re-marketed as having some bullshit to do with love, in the only slightly less crappy modern day extensions of those societies.

People should respect no claim of ownership over other people.

Revisionists?

MGTOW

>737923874

cool story bro.

what is prenup

Most guys can't get sex without having to settle for a relationship. A woman's power is her puss, a man's power is his commitment. Give away your commitment too soon and you're the equivalent of a slut.

That said let the betas be beta. Better to fuck someone's wife than be the chump whose wife is getting fucked. I will never marry because I want grils to like me for who I am, not for what I can provide. the only way to keep a woman honest is not giving her anything but your body and company. Start handing out perks and you're basically pushing them to become dishonest once they fall out of love, because they'll wear any mask just for those perks. While fucking Chad on the side of course.

Tl;dr: only thing you can give a woman is a good dicking, otherwise you're screwing yourself over

How about she just love me for me, like I do with her? She's not going out of her way to keep me interested, so I'm not going to for her.

>Always give her less than she gives you
>She's not yours to keep, only yours to have right now
>Women want what other women have, so keep flirting with other chicks and have her know about it
>be your own man
>Have backup chicks so you won't have to start from scratch each time
>Don't be a bitch

Sad as it is, don't count on eternal romantic love. That meme was outdated as soon as it was invented back in the renaissance. If you can't be happy on your own, all you can expect is an emotional dependence on some harpie who will tear our your heart anyway.

bruh.. all my feels for you. Im in the same situation mostly.
married for 7 years, together for 8. She loves sex and says I dont put out often enough. I just cant be bothered with the boring 2 positions and always having to initiate just to get hard. it sucks and the only real excitement I have anymore is thinking about leaving when my kids are old enough.

Thanks. Keep posting those messages. The rattling of your cage may serve as a warning to the rest.

I've just recently got engaged, I'm not sure I'm doing the right because I know it will make her happy but it's not what I want. Will I get happier or be in this unhappy state till I leave?

IMO most of our current day problems stem from ignoring our gut feeling. Make of that what you will. But honestly, I think you're fucked. I've heard soooo many divorcees talk about how they didn't feel comfy about the whole ordeal right from the start. Spoiler: it never gets better.

I plan to. younger guy I work with I tell every time I can remember to NEVER GET MARRIED. shit fucking sucks. should have just started working out and smashing random bitches, living the good life.

BAIL OUT NOW!!! god dammit user, fucking bail. jesus christ youll be in your 40's and have missed out on a shit load of opportunities. BAIL NOW!

I think you're fucking retarded for doing something not for yourself but for someone else. Someone who is going to treat you like shit for the coming years. You haven't noticed a change in behaviour yet? Many men think it's just pre-marriage induced stress. Imagine what a joke it is when they find out it's only the mask falling off.

I'm not 100% anti-marriage, but if you feel the need to vent about this on Sup Forums of all places, you better give this a long and hard thought. You can still bail. The longer you wait the messier it will become for all parties involved.

Based user. Have some tits. I hope you'll find happiness again one day. Remember, marriage is for how long you can suck it up. But divorce, divorce is forever.