Sup Forums I wanted to ask you if it's weird to want to induce mental illness on myself...

Sup Forums I wanted to ask you if it's weird to want to induce mental illness on myself. For a long time I've been wanting to do this, and it almost almost worked. I had a few breaks with reality and shit in the past. I know this must be extremely unhealthy for me but why should I care? I would just like to experience the point of insanity.

It's your life, nothing to do with it for us

soo...?

Don't do it user, seriously.
It could ruin your life forever, I have derealization and I wouldn't wish it to everyone. Shit is not cash

How do you induce it

why don't you look for ecchi instead?

what are your methods?

Fucking this. I used to have that also. Definitely try yoga, meditation and exercise. Probably a good idea to speak to a therapist too. It can get better trust me.

Become an engineering major.
>GODMODE: Double-major in Physics.

yeah

just don't give a fuck

I did it through isolating myself away from others and living in my own kind of fantasy. That alone would disturb you. I convinced myself that I was being watched by the "invisible people" that I could not see, and I was pretending to hear voices in my head who were talking to me. That would leave you pretty messed up. I even self harmed and cut each of my arms and had suicidal thoughts near the end. The scars are still there. I just reached breaking point and had to come out of it before I got any worse.

I'm already exercising and eating good foods, I'll try yoga and meditation, thanks. For me, it started when I've tried marijuana for the first time, what about you?

> Induce mental illness
Just don't sleep for 4-5 days or take drugs. DPH should be the best. DXM too. Mushrooms too.

Stay in the Matrix, I feel like psychedelics turned a switch on in my brain and now it's hard too look at reality in the same way, it's so incredibly abstract and I feel like im mentally rejecting it and every time I try to accept what I am, I wish I could go back to just accepting life but every day I feel like I'm looking at things from a third person perspective

Been there, done that.
Actually got out of it in a natural way.
And I do not regret it at all, infact it made me a thousand times better than I ever could've been before.

Obviously this can go wrong too.
There were many times and long times where I was legit convinced that I'll never see any normalcy again.
Alot of weed, alot of acid, a hell of alot more mushrooms, coke, benzos, ketamine and whatever else I took.

I went in with the mindset of "Whatever, I want to die anyways so why not have fun while doing it"
After some time coming down with schizophrenia, paranoia, ocd and autism symptoms and a very weird fit of tourettes I made it back to a somewhat reasonable state.

If you want to die anyways and are convinced that you're gonna do that, then go this way if you like drugs.
But also be prepared to feel even more like absolute shit than you have ever imagined you could.

You're not as aware as you believe yourself to be.

I'm aware enough for it to be ruining my fucking life

you just described me, on my way out now.

how is your state these days?

Had that too, struggled for a while, talked a lot to my friends, and have learned (am learning) to just accept it. Nothing has changed except my perception, so why should I let it fuck with me so much?

@OP if you want some mindfuck, get yourself some 20x salvia (proper 20), and take a good hit off it using a torch lighter. You probably won't taste much, it's a very smooth smoke, and in 30 seconds you'll be snatched out of your body for a 20 minute ride through hell that'll feel like several years.

Quite average. Besides the murderous thoughts and everything else, yeah I'm okay.

That's what I mean.
You ruin your own life. Even consider that you have no power over your own awareness.
Like this you can't do anything and are rightfully bitching, you put yourself there.

hold up. iv'e done 60x salvia and i will say it's trippy but that stuff only lasts few mins tops.

Then you haven't had real 60x, or you didn't use it properly. I had 20x homemade by some dude, and it blew my socks off. Literally felt like something grabbed me by the back of the head, twisted me (my whole body) 90° clockwise, and off I went.
I almost cried from happiness when I was back home 10 minutes later, because I lived an entire life, and at the end of the trip I was laying in my coffin, and lots of people came by, they didn't say a thing, but they radiated disappointment.

trust me you dont want that

schizophrenia is fun

i did this from age of 13-14 i wanted to be crazy and get more confidence that way.
gets complicated, insanity really isnt pleasant at all.
at times youll feel so frustrated, imagine being in the desert scorching heat all the time.
dont do it, i made bad choices on perpose to give my life a swing and its just not worth the experience, youll end up wanting to be normal, i get nostalgic over the smallest things and whatever i feel ive lost or havent missed, like school, youll get disconnected with people your age if youre young and do this.
not worth 1/10

You're wasting time user. Going insane isn't going to improve your quality of life at all. It's true that your existence is meaningless, but for as long as you're alive, you should want to be comfortable.

er the smallest things and whatever i feel ive lost or havent missed

have missed*

you mad white boi? we get all of the white womin while you die on drugs niggas sold you lol

you will be much happier when you are dead and gone, and all of the white womin are ours. white mens can only be cucks LOL

Please don't do it. I'm begging you. I've had psychotic breaks before and I'm telling you it's the most empty feeling. It's like talking to yourself knowing your brain is fucked up but not being able to project yourself as you used to be. Do you know what it would feel like consciously knowing you have fucked your brain up and not being able to do a thing about it?

dont get me wrong it was a hell of a trip , ive done alot of drugs and nothing quite like salvia.

just didn't last that long. felt like it did. but in reality was couple mins.

was shop bort thought so that could be it.

Create a tulpa, then make a thread.

...

...

...

...

So you pretend to be crazy and cut yourself. Sounds like Tumblr would be better for you

Wasted get. Fuck you op