I've never been in a fight before, Sup Forums...

i've never been in a fight before, Sup Forums. how can i defend myself and stand my ground next time an ogre at the bar wants to be a douchebag?

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bottle him in the face and run the fuck away.

A knife

Land your first punch hard and precise.

Develop an "animal backed into a corner" mentality

you already know

youtube.com/watch?v=VfEKjfM50mM

bars attract barflys
whiskey voiced,tatted broads missing 2 teeth
bad boys whom you cant stand sober.
take lessons about 3 months of lessons from a MMA ex military guy

When he goes for a Haymaker (Most common used move in street fights) duck and punch him in the dick (Or leg if you want to be less of a dick). Under the assumption you can atleast throw a jab or cross properly you should be able to make his leg weak enough to slow him down or making him squel in pain if you hit him in the dick.

"Russian Wing Chun", Alternativly "Drunk Wing Chun". The moves are based from Wing chun but they run around like they were in a kung fu movie or something.

user wtf is this shit?

Russians trying to do Wing Chun.

Solving this is extremely easy.
Don't be in a shitty situation like that.
The first things they teach you at CC class is to avoid fights, then diffuse fights if needed. Then when forced to, fight.

So don't go to a natty bar.
Don't pick fights.
Casually downplay violence.

This.

Its not an MMA match. Its a REKT thread, irl. Stand up next to a mountain, chop it down with the edge of your hand. You have to leave the dude on his back, swatting at butterflies.

>avoid fights
See:
>ive never been in a fight

someone award captain obvious with the key to the city. doesn't stop niggers & roid ragers from nigging & raging

Gouge eyes, aim for throat, groin, kneecaps, nose, ear box, solar plexus, and jaw. Strike hard and first. Hit them with intent to kill. (most likely you won't succeed) which is a good thing. After incapacitating opponent, leave the area.

> Don´t be in a shitty situation lika that
> Implying you got a choice.

I am not op but grew up in the Slums sometimes you have to fight.
Simple answer on how to avoid fights is look intimidating. As long as you look scary and do not pick fights no one will pick a fight with you. They would much rather pick a fight with someone looking small and weak.

Eyes is a shitty advice user. It is really hard to hit eyes even if you are trained. Otherwise Throat, Groin, Nose, Ear and Jaw is quite good tips. I would add thigh due to the fact that MMA fighters hit there all the time and if someone knows how to fight properly they will take strenght from there.

Pepper spray

>look intimidating
OP here. have been told a few times that I look intimidating. maybe that's why i've never been in a fight (i'm in my 30's)

Always be on the offensive, be ferocious, even when you're guarding try to push them back.

Probably. Let´s just say it like this. If you were looking for a fight, robbing something exe. Would you A. Take the 5.0 man that looks like he has been bullied his whole life or B. The 6ft tall man with muscles as big as your head?

Just like this guy said.
OFC you should try and avoid fights as much as you can, but when push comes to shove just knee him in the groin and run.

I'm 5'9" 210 lbs, wide frame, relatively pure german ancestry

Good. Also behaviour is a big part of it. I am 5.5 with about 90kg on me. No one has ever tried to rob me exe.

Grab anything and everything you can to use as a weapon. Throw glass at him, pick up a chair, whatever. This is not a fighting match, it's self-defense. Guarantee you he won't even get to you before the bouncers or cops show up.

Dont try to look too intimidating tho, guy I work with is a really nice bloke super cool and just genral chill sort of fella, he gets overlooked for every job he gos for just because he looks mean as fuck, feel kinda bad for him

The most common and reliable reliable trick os the old one-two. Punch the person with medium strength towards the chest with your non dominsnt hand. When they go to block it, fucking slam them in the face with a hook using your dominant hand. Always get the first punch, if you get the first punch your chamcr of winnimg goes way up.

When I go out, I don't try to look any certain way. Usually dress in casual, barely classy. Polo shirts, occasionally a button up shirt, blue jeans with belt, etc

Fight dirty.
It's no shame to kick someone in the balls followed by a knee to the face if you avoid getting robbed/beaten by some idiot that way.
If you are fat just takle him to the ground and get on top , it's auto win.

Cause I'm a voodoo child

I also never get in fights, like you I dress normally but have facial scars, there not from fighting but from a dog attack years ago but I think people look at that and think ok and move on

Go tell the security that he's going to hit you throw them some cash and have them beat the living shit outa him

>ogre at the bar wants to be a douchebag
If you raise your hand in any way to another human, you have to be ready to kill them, even by accident.
Then comes the tough part: you have to stand up in court and plead guilty. Because if you do anything other than move along you're responsible.
Someone needs to be a douche in a bar? LET THE BABY HAVE HIS BOTTLE. If he touches you, call the cops and have him removed. If he's intimidating you, ignore it or invite him to go for it. He can only kill you once.
Bar room Bruce Lees are fucken cancer, if you push or kick someone and they die, you have to know it was necessary or the guilt will eat you to the bone.
t. 30 years in martial arts

You don't, you'll get destroyed. Offer to suck his dick if he promises not to hurt you.

>I would add thigh due to the fact that MMA fighters hit there all the time
MMA is garbage, there's real reasons you can't do small joint manipulation in MMA, look up all the other things you can't do in MMA. They are things that will kill you no matter how tough you are.
MMA fight with Mirko Cro Cop was stopped in seconds because a fingertip grazed his eye. Bare-knuckle boxers who know they are losing will open their hands up to maximise the chance of a similar stoppage.
TLDR fingers to the eyes like a flash of light, first thing.

Everybody fights dirty. Fighting dirty isn't some secret technique that only a select few know about and is the key to winning, it's literally what comes naturally and instinctively when the adrenalin starts flowing.

It's all well and good telling somebody to fight dirty against the other guy, but in reality the other guy's going to be doing exactly the same.

Pic related

Turn your back, pull your pants down, arch your back and bend over a table, then wait.

>relatively pure german ancestry
i love when people who talk like this get tested and find out they are 14% middle eastern and 3% Ashkenazi Jew. Should change their whole thinking but probably doesn't.

Sure thing... Let´s not use the same system that is designed to be the most brutal system in the world because you are not allowed to gouge eyes. Something that is incredibly hard irl...

Don't punch to the jaw with a fist, you're likely to break a finger or two. An open-palmed strike will do the job just as well and will be less likely to cause you injury.

>can trace my family tree back to the 1820's german immigration wave into the USA
I'm about 80% aryan with a splash of american indian.

also:
>sending your money and DNA to a group of kikes to be analyzed & catalogued
>ever

>scars
>big muscles
m8 the amount of violence a man can do is in his eyes, if you can't judge that you're just bad at life.
Nasty little street dudes will headbutt a big tough looking guy to impress girls or just to let off steam, if they think he hasn't got that mean streak in him.
Then again, it's always a gamble and you can get surprised. The most violent man i ever saw was a murderer in court who like a lot of really evil men was muscled and very softly spoken.

>1820s
oh my. I know a Chinese guy who can recite his ancestry, broken occasionally by explanations of who moved where or what made them do so, going back two thousand years.
He's not even nobility of any kind, just a Chinese guy.
You know it's always been a joke about the USA that it was made of people that couldn't get along in Europe and since then it's been mixed with natives and africans, right?
gg jamal

>system that is designed to be the most brutal system in the world
but it's not. It's a sport. With rules that you clearly don't know.
Pls don't fall for marketing hype, if contestants could bite, attack the neck, eyes and groin and twist fingers and toes there'd be very short bouts and about 13 men in the world left after a year.
That's how mandingo fights used to go and they were pure murder. MMA is a sport.

Try and get in one good hit to knock them out first. make sure it connects. if your not both pussies your both gonna be takin some hits but not goin down from them. swingin both fists kinda retarded but also tryint to hold ur head back. Ive been stabbed 13 times ive been shott twice i spent 2 years in stateville pen joint im from chicago and i fought mostly niggers

Not sure about that.
I think there are a lot of people who are not willing to go all in/fight (realy)dirty.
Most fights I saw began with one guy pushing the other and the other going for a punch to the face.
Never saw anyone just kicking his "bully" straight in the balls when attacked.

you can only learn from experience do you want to fight me to get some experience where do you live

Redneck, USA. SEMO

Grow A Man Bun!

come to Aus and have some fun

>be me, 27, 5'7, 126 pounds
>what do

>thin, wirey user
Never fuck with the scrawny wirey guy

I see your point. However I am gonna counter with the most classical argument of all. How the fuck do you expect to perform a lethal technique for the first time in a life and death situation. Granted though that some leg joints exe become very useless in real life aswell as it is limiting in certain aspects that are needed in order to not have a career off two to three fights. Sure there is a bunch of fancy techniques that aproximetly 5% of the practioceners know. But for most people it is far better to just learn simple shit that works extremly well. If you got a real martial arts intrest sure looking into wing chun or similar might be a fun thing. But for most it is just worthless. Anyways look at kick boxing, or muy thai aswell. All of these have one thing in common leg strikes. because proper punches take power from the legs, torso and arm. By taking out one of those you offer yourself a quick way to either run away or a advantage in the fight. Which was my original argument.

Same user as in this commentI think JKD practioners prove my point well. Most of them really suck but we have a few geniuses among them that probably could beat most MMA fighters in a street fight.