Depression thread:

Depression thread:

- 35 years old

- 2 kids, 4 year old and 12 year old autistic step son

- wife is 240lbs and lazy as hell. always starts things and never follows through. recently lost her job and doesn't do much at the house. she has potential to be hot , but for last 10 years she simply gives up on doing anything to lose weight. My dreams of her on a bikini or a sexy Halloween costume are starting to just be fantasy

- me and wife always tense and fight nearly every day. I feel resentful that I work out, in shape , and feel I take care of 4 year old more than she does. recently became bitter at 12 year old step son because feel unappreciated after all I've done for him last 10 years.

- stuck in a thankless job. make only $70k in southern California while basically everyone my age I know makes twice as much.

- wife always ridicules my interests and gives me a hard time if I step foot outside of home for more than an hour to do something I enjoy. I can't go to the beach to swim once a week because she will get bitchy, my bjj class is 1 hour a day and she makes fun of it all the time. that's all I do basically and swimming is only in summer. just work and home and what SHE wants to do.

- feeling my life is wasted and getting too old to start over. Honestly only thing keeping me from grabbing my gun and blowing my brains out is my 4 year old son who is so attached to me.

I know this is Sup Forums and it's cool to be edgy , but any genuine good people on here to talk to ?

Thank you guys

If you want to exit user, start documenting everything and plan to take your kid with you to somewhere with a lower standard of living.

if you can rock-solid prove a custody case, and you want to exit, that's your best bet. Leave autismo and fatty-cares-not behind.

Optionally, if you want to stay, convince Fatty-Cares-Not that you need someone to keep your focus, to keep your discipline, and that you're afraid of a life without her, blah blah blah. There's old people, and there's fat people, but very few old fat people - you couldn't stand to live without her, blah blah blah.

Roll her ass on the mat a couple times, maybe she'll like it.

I'm a softy.... despite my resentment of her wasting the prime years of my life i would never take someone's kid away from her.

I was good with my step son since he was 3.... just got resentful over her family talking shit if I so much as post a Facebook pic with him not in it. after all I've done and what little she's done.

Dude I'm only 23 years old and even I can tell you need a divorce what the hell are you doing man just pull the trigger already. (As in the divorce not a gun)

I'm in so cal with the same exact problem only I have a lot of girls hitting on me. They see me wife as a none issue.

never been hit on in my life. how old are you ? can you elaborate on your situation more ?

dear user,

my name is dustin. im 35. my relationship has gone to shit with what was suppose to be my wife. one thing that keeps me going is my 3 years old daughter. i keep thinking about hanging myself in the closet with a belt. one thing that is keeping me somewhat afloat is my daughter. i just watched a gore thread and i usually can't make it through certain videos but i forced myself to watch the guy get his legs hacked off. i sobbed for him. i sobbed for myself. i don't really know where this is going but other people are out here just barely hanging on as well.

It's called making shit up on Sup Forums to insight that very response

Dude just because you are 35 doesn't mean your life is over, you just need a change of scenery or perspective...dump those kids & that dumpster fire of a wife of yours & jump on a Greyhound bus & start your life all over again

33yo user, I make €26k. Im an architect, this is the highest I can get in my country.
Girlfriend has just left me after 6 years together.

Im thinking in going back to my parents house

It's never too late to start again.

Hey buddy. I am 29, 60k/yr when everyone i know makes 100k. Have a 3 year old and another on the way. I am in the same boat as you.

Edginess aside the truth is this made me laugh uncontrollably. And don't call me edgy because you watch people get their legs cut off

Have you tried really talk to your wife. Sit alone with her, tell her your concerns, offer help to lose weight if it's actually harmful for her. It just sounds to me that she might be depressed. Talk and then make your decision. It's not good for you or the kids to stay in a toxic relationship.

I feel you bro. Can't say much, because your situation with the fatty is pretty fucked, and I feel depressed enough too to counsel anybody, but my sincere opinion is that you have proven to be a man of high value taking care of her sick kid. Also, you do bjj and swim, which is good for you. Just set some limits to the fatty man, don't let them through so much shit on you, you don't deserve it

Taking the bait - assuming it's serious (dumb move I know)

>- feeling my life is wasted and getting too old to start over

It's never too late to start over. This can be with her or without her, but given her previous laziness, it's more than likely gonna end up without her.
Take her away for a weekend somewhere and explain to her exactly what you've explained to us. Her actions (or inactions, really) are causing you to fall out of love with her and she needs to step up. Be prepared for her to take off like a fucking rocket at this news but try and get past it so that you guys can actually talk. Explain to her that you guys can either start over together or start over apart and you'd prefer a start over together. Something needs to be done user, it's not healthy to go on like this

why is your relationship with your wife bad ? what happened and how long did that take ?

it's hard when you have kids, but they do keep you going

Go leave her, but do you still love her ?

you are still young and u can have many better girl for a better life :)

don't kill yourself its useless :D

come on man... Why would I ever leave my 4 year old son who is the only person who is ever happy to see me and genuinely loves me ? there's no way

if I didn't have a kid with her I'd have left in a heartbeat

And he should try to avoid as much as possible to not get angry, just talking calmly. And try not quilt her so much, like saying: "OUR MARRIAGE IS FALLING APART BECAUSE YOUR FAT!".

Hey dude, I'm 35 and make fuckall an hour at a shitty job. Your wife sounds toxic and is waaaay too big obviously. I'd try and reason with her and give her a practical ultimatum or you leave. Your 12 year old is just 12, I wouldn't take any offense as the kid is still growing. Try doing other things to clear your head or just go to the fucking pool, what's she gonna do? Chase you (sorry low blow)

why did she leave user ? was she hot or so so ? were you even happy with her ?

Sounds to me like user is already past anger, and into despondency

over the 10 years we have been together ? countless times.

got her treadmill. never used it.
got her gym membership. never went and still paying monthly for it.
countless times started diet for both of us just to motivate her. nothing.
finally she's been going to a weight loss clinic for last year or so and they gave her 5 pills to take a day... she barely does that either and gets defensive when I ask.

just complete lack of motivation to get better. I see all these ugly.ass guys with attractive girls and I wonder what the fuck I did wrong

not really happy, but I thought we could be better if we tried together.
she just disappeared from one day to another, guess she was seeing another guy or something, who knows. I didnt want to know neither.

Last year I won an international architecture contest and all I can get is a shitty 26k job.. its too depressing.
I know burger king workers make up to 18k per year, so I dont know why the fuck I became an architect.

Try to do something better for yourself man. Apply for jobs, if you can't find a better one, try to improve your skills. You are already doing very good with your physical activity, if you want to do more, feel free, you don't have to ask her for permission, you are the man. And don't bother much with her. Try to find some inner you, so she can fuck herself

Thanks man., that helps a lot

she just starts arguing with me and going off on these strange tangents, like how 10 years ago I asked her nicely to take a shower because she smelled really bad and it just escalates from there.

I'm just tired user. I just wanted a normal wife and stating to wonder if all women are just lazy and bitchy.

>2 kids and a wife
>$70k and a job

knows full well about this and comes to Sup Forums for support.

nigga Sup Forums is filled with people who work in dollar stores and live in their mother's basements fapping to anime with a fleshlight aged 30 and you want us to FEEL SORRY FOR YOU?

With a BBW wife,genetic prodigy and earning close to 100k each year.

>get the fuck out normie.

Seriously, sounds to me that she might be depressed. But if that is how she has always been, it's just nature. If you don't have anything common anymore, you don't love her, best thing might be to leave her and try to take the kid with you. You just don't have the same values in life and you pretty much have done what you can. You can do better.

where are you ?? my brother in law is an architect and I don't know how much he makes but at LEAST $100k a year

ok but what happened to make you grow apart like that ?

Brother all you need is The Lord.

He can help you with your family. :)

Spain
..

How the hell did you manage to look at her this long? Not every girl is crazy. Some of them are actually rational people.

That's what I'm trying to do. find happiness elsewhere without her. I love the beach and swimming in the summer and BJJ is my obsession and has been for years. problem is I get shit on for this all the time.
just sucks as I had a much more romantic ideal for my marriage

so am I user, been diagnosed with depression 3 times but can't live with side effects of meds, so just suffering through it. I still work out and take care of myself and my family. it's hard as fuck to even get out of bed every morning.... but I have to

There's times I sit back and really worry about what my life is going to be like with my hot, piece of ass girlfriend who is actually truly insane and maybe even dangerous to be around, then I read the things in the this thread and the relief rushes over me. But the depression and anxiety is still there. Pic related

That's very low for an architect... Why don't you come to the United States? you would make so much more

This

Not all of them user, but I'm sure thats hard to believe right now. Honestly? It sounds like it's time to move on. It sounds like she's given up a long time ago and is just being a massive dick so you instigate divorce proceedings and she can get a decent alimony. Just set yourself up on the side, start doing more of the stuff you like to do and ignore the hard time she tries to give you, start up small savings accounts in your sons names and pay some in each month (this is shit/fan prep), find yourself another place and move out. Do right by your sons, move on and be happy. It may be the wake up call she needs.

If I were you I'd either kill myself or just disappear from the face of the earth and go live somewhere where I cant be found. Second option is prolly your best bet.

I hate to break it to you man.... but she not hot. too skinny and no ass to speak of. so you'll be fine if your worried about guys hitting in her etc

>if your worried about guys hitting in her etc

if only this was true

Househam Henderson are taking on in Madrid. They'll pay you better than 26k

I hear you user. It's hard to basically tell them to stop being fat and lazy, at least it is if you care about looking shallow. I don't mind admitting I'm a shallow person when it comes to women. I work out 6 days a week and run 6 days a week. I work hard to maintain a physique that my wife finds attractive, so when she had our kids and started slacking off and literally getting fatter by the day, I told her to hit the gym or hit the road. She chose the gym.

Do it for the kids.
They deserve a good role model and it seems like you are their only hope.

I wish you the best.

Hi OP

I dont want to sound mean, but can you tell me how to not marry a woman like your wife?

i am 24 yo and would like my first marriage to be my only marriage

Never EVER stay together for the kids. It fucks them up and they'll end up in the same situation as the parents

pretty much this

kek

It depends on the situation
if there is abuse, do anything to stop the abuse
if there is just mild unhappiness, that is different and staying together is an option

It's 2017 buddy, you were born 50yrs too late. If you go the marriage route, expect to be married a couple times. Also new combined families and taking care of your wife's son. Sounds like a blast doesn't it.

Should be the easiest relationship in the world.

>if there is just mild unhappiness, that is different and staying together is an option

Disagree user, staying together when you don't want to is a form of self abuse. The message that is sent to the kids is "be unhappy"

>raising someone elses child

fuck that, i even think thats where OP fucked up

If you can talk to her about pretty much anything, she wont get mad about stupid shit and will listen to your thoughts. And if she has same values as you. Everyone changes over time physically and mentally, but these are the best advise I can give.

is 70k like 70 000$ a year?
I don't even reach 23 000€ a year, how is your life so complicated you amerifucks?

A women can change attitude overnight, like flipping a switch. I personally call it the Ice Queen effect. In the end, their main concern is self preservation. Not her kids, not her marriage, not her vows. They're wired to be selfish, because they are the centre of their world.

people will be unhappy for periods of time during a relationship, that is inevitable.

The kids need to see the parents attempt to find a path that betters the families life. Then they will see what needs to happen when a family is unhappy.

Because USA has one of the highest wages around. And they get taxed less

UK here, you're looking at around £40k a year at 35. compared to USA where you're looking at 3 digits. Get taxed less, and dont have to settle for the shittest healthcare

>people will be unhappy for periods of time during a relationship, that is inevitable

Not disputing that, I'm saying that staying together "for the kids" is a problem. It's not a valid reason to stay together and does more harm than good.

I'm not saying don't try, but when the trying is done, and it hasn't worked, it's time to move on to teach your kids that it's ok to be happy

Just take you and your son and RUN. Just run away and never look back

37. Got 4 kids. My wife ways 280. Doesn't even seem to want to loose weight. I go to the gym 4 times a week and weigh 205 lbs. I have worked in a machine shop for 11 years. Job keeps cutting back, yet demanding we make more parts. Have a degree in Business Management, but would have to start at the bottom making shit wages or move. I feel trapped.

Truth

basically don't assume it will get better with time. if she tells you she is going through a phase and will lose weight, or says things like "yeah when I'm in better shape we will defiantly go to the beach all the time" etc

none of that will happen.

Divorce the cunt and drown the autismo

Southern California is a really high cost area, though.

Stick with the bjj. It should make you realize there's always a better way. If you feel it's timee to bail then find a way to reduce your taxable income like a 529 plan for your youngest kid. That way you protect him. You obviously arent a douche since you've stuck it out with a stepson. Still hope. Well your house and move to state midwest. Try for full custody. Document everrything.

his dad take a him every other week, so he's only wit us every other week.

Damn it jesus, quit bumming of my crack

Lol still not every single girl. Yeah I get that A LOT of girls are like that. Maybe it's just girls that have or have had low self esteem that aren't cunts.

San Diego is expansive as fuck. $50k is seriously poverty level

if this isnt horse shit.

sit her down tell her you love her and how you feel otherwise its never going to get any better for anyone involved

your kid doesnt deseve to grow up without a dad

Southern California is a really really expensive area of the US.

Im the one making 26000€ a year, lol europoors :(

sounds the same as me but 4 kids ? damn.

How old are they ? are you close to them? was your wife always so fat ?

Thanks user. yeah my BJJ and my son are all I have at this point

incite*

"Weights" I mean. Fuck

why do people keep thinking I'm trolling or making it up? why ?

Seems like you need to consider leaving your wife OP.

You only have the one kid tying you two together & really doesn't matter if you are a couple to raise a child. As long as each does their part or you just take care of the kid yourself then that's fine too. There is no point being unhappy forever to try and put on a show to the kid that staying together is the most important thing. The kid will see the unhappiness anyway and will view that dysfunction as a 'normal' family to then be perpetuated to his relationships.

35 isn't that old even bro, you have lots of time left and lots of good years to spend with someone who actually makes you happy.

Can't hang on to what once was or could have been - deal with the reality of the situation.
If you don't have that baggage & only have the kid of yours to worry about you will be much more open/free to pursue your career goals or take initiative with your own life.

You'll end up snapping sooner or later if you stay in which case you'll be years older in the exact same predicament just without the benefit of being younger.

have you threatened to leave her, user? I think if you show that you're really fucking serious about leaving and make her know that she will panic - you're her livelihood and without you she will have to get up and actually do shit
make her feel awful
make her feel disgusting for being such a pig

Rip my friend this country is a shit, just learn a third idiom like portucheese or german and leave this piece of shit

ok but here is the reality of the situation at least here in fucking California:

- she will take half my salary as alimony for life. we have been married for 10 years and California (along with New York) are the worst towards men in divorce cases. I will probably have to move in with my parents again

- BEST case scenario I Will see my kid 50% of the time. and I HATE THE IDEA of leaving him with her for days at a time. she doesn't even brush his fucking teeth and rarely does anything for him unless I get mad and prompt her to.

- worried she will date so cholo shit head and be around my son. ahe used to have sex with me in bed with my step son sleeping next to us when he was 3. karma will fuck me up.

I know your right... just terrified of how my life will be

more pics of wife's hot ass

heh... there's always one anomaly for everything and her it is.

trust me... she's not hot but here you go

thank you op, its posts like these that make being forever alone a bit more bearable

You had a kid with her. That's where you fucked up. Now, no matter what, even if you leave, you'll never be happy. She'll take half of your shit in the divorce, AND get money for child support. Mistake. Raising an Autistic child is the most thankless job in the world, by the way. They lack the capacity to understand everything you've done for them, so they will always want and expect more. Any less than that, and you're a garbage person. 14 more years until you can be free, kind of, user. You got that in you?

i really appreciate this OP lol. her ass def looks nice but I'm assuming the rest isn't all that great?

it's funny... When I was in my early 20s I would see other couples and feel depressed why I never had a gf... then met my wife at 25 and 10 years later still look at other couples but it's mostly out of jealousy as to how attractive the wife looks etc

fake your death.

Honest question: how hard is it raising an autistic child?

Honestly?
If you want to stop this just do it. Tell your wife that either she change her attitude, or you are getting divorced. Your life is ruining you.

Not really. this is her at lightest weight where she looked somewhat decent

fake your death, go swimming and never come back. they will report you drown, and wont find the body, common in the ocean. your son would understand, at least I would.

kek if this last part is real maybe offing yourself is a viable option

actually giving a shit about something you see online, good god are you new to the internet? it's not about being edgy, it's about just completely dissociating yourself from stuff like that. do you also cry when you people make posts about losing their pets or getting cancer? what the fuck is wrong with you

>inb4 b8
fell for it; astonishes me how soft people can be

>having kids
>getting married
that's where you fucked up user

>That hand

You're clearly a nigger and this is clearly one of the more subtle race mixing threads

>gut is bigger than her tits
>"somewhat decent"

Nigga, you got a hooked nose or some shit we don't know about?