Secrets thread
Get in here and tell yours.
I'll start.
>I have a very feminine voice
>I'm a guy with no intentions of being a trap, so I pretend I'm mute most of the time and use sign language as my primary means of communication.
>Voice recording for proof.
Other urls found in this thread:
vocaroo.com
vocaroo.com
twitter.com
Last year I was at my friends house party. He passed out only a few hours in, but his wife was still going strong.
Long story short, she ended up sucking my dick in their bathroom. I've never told him, and a few occasions since she has tried to hook up, but I decline.
Feels bad man, I regret getting as drunk as I did.
>hello r9k
>clear artifacts from voice modulating
starting a secrets thread off with that kind of shitty lie? fuck you, sage
Except they tested me repeatedly in r9k. I passed each one.
Fuck you.
you failed at the first hurdle here when you reused a recording somebody posted to another board faggot
I dont get to tell the police 'oh no my headlights have been tested repeatedly by the mechanic, I'll just be on my way'
>she has tried to hook up, but I decline.
i hate women
No kidding. I mean I'm a piece of shit for letting it happen, but when you're drunk and horny and a girl offers to put your dick in her mouth, it's hard to say no
I have a few (very visibly) gay friends. Went shopping with one of them one day for funnies and all the hot staff chicks thought I was gay too. I was staring at their breasts and checking them the fuck out and they took it as a compliment - One even corrected her tits in her bra for me as I was talking to her.
No numbers unfortunately because I'm a filthy beta and felt awkward about asking. :(
>still no identifying data
>still audio artifacts
slightly better but I'm still not buying it
if you do 'niggers tongue my anus' I'll probably be more convinced
bmp
this is called being autistic
good stuff. the guy probably knows and is a cuck
not immediately correcting a girl if she thinks you're gay is probably the most beta thing you can do. you'd have to keep pretending to be gay if you got their numbers. it's pretty sad, but in this particular situation, it's probably better to just stay beta and stare at boobs.
hello fellow ausfag
I appreciate your effort given OP turned out to be a lying faggot
yep.
Perthfag here
A team that repeatedly posts the same threads such as WWYD, wife/girlfriend/ex, cuckold, and fb/instagram threads are spamming Sup Forums hourly, which slows down later in the evening. Around 8:00am US Western time, they begin to militantly post from mobile devices, sometimes a PC with a proxy. This is nothing but a team of shills and fakes. None of the "girlfriends" or exes posted are even legitimate. They ask for kiks, snapchats, etc for "trades", which are nothing but a scam. Others post "reddit" links which link to a suspicious file-sharing site. They are all by the same persons just sitting here hourly.
Notice how ALL of those threads are in one way or another a form of cuckoldry.
>WWYD?
Why would someone care? Only a cuckold would care about what someone else would do.
>Post your "girlfriend/wife/ex"
Why would you care? Only a cuckold would care about what someone else would do.
>Post your fb/instagram "friends"
Why would you care? Only a cuckold would care about what someone would do.
>Cuckold
Obvious one
>Incest
I think this is just some weird British guy.
This is by a team called Project Normalize and a shill from Reddit known as John Bettendorf to push a cuckold narrative, eventually to bait people into posting personal information, hoping to normalize a trend among users.
Like how I mentioned before about mobile devices, you can tell that the shills use apple iPhones due to the IMG filenames, and Mac computers due to the screenshot_(date and time) filenames.
Kik threads are actually illegal CP-trading threads, which is how Project Normalize started back when they dumped CP on 8 (chan)
Do not feed the shills. Do not kik with them. Do not join discord threads.
This is getting creepy now.
6014 here. you?
My niece has her 11th bday this weekend. My gift to her is a gift card to victorias secret, it's what she wanted. her parents wouldnt be happy if they knew about it, they are conservative jesusfags. but idgaf
6112.
want to catch up for a burger later? serious btw.
cant, working til late - but thanks for the offer.
6170 here
I fucked a married girl (20 the) in a hotel in Italy. Her husband was at the beach, she was married to a mobster looking guy from England.(golden rings, chains etc) she told me that he beats the living shit out of her.
I fucked her good tho, and later at night he was walking down the beach with a whiskey bottle in his hand and a cigarette, so I went to him and bummed a cigarette and asked him about his day. He said and I quote "my daughter, won't talk to me, we came here together I was hoping I'd spend some time with her before I died, I have cancer. " I asked him is your daughter "name"? And gave him the girls name, he said yeah.
I was confused so I went back to their room, and I found her fucking another guy. I asked her if the old man was her dad, she said yes.
So basically this girl went with her dad in holiday, and fucked two random strangers in the same day, and tried to push both of us against her "presumably" abusive husband, who is in fact her father. She wanted him killed, or his ass beaten.
So I told her and the idiot bloke in that room that he has cancer, she laughed hysterically and called her friend, she told her "cancer can you believe it? Woohoo"
I couldn't take this, neither could the bloke getting dressed, so we dragged her to the beach from her hair and explained everything to her dad. He beat the absolute living shit out of her while crying. He was so mad he cried and slapped and cried and punched.
She got a royal, and I mean royal ass kicking.
And he thanked us, drunkenly.
The bitch came to my room with a knife after she had stabbed her dad, and tried to stab me as well (because feminisiiiiiiim omg)
I took the knife away, and broke half her lower jaw with a few jabs and some right hooks she went down like a sack of shit, security came, and took everyone to the police department, they later told me the old man had died, she stabbed him while he was asleep.
Anyway, moral of the story, women are insects never trust them
Amen to that
Also as far as feminisiiiiiiim goes, they are a joke. Don't take them seriously as they will never matter to anything other than liberal propaganda. Let then bark and cluck and in the end they'll suck it up and keep quiet in the kitchen.
Respect bro, You did the right thing, She deserves to be skinned alive, fucking cunt
you're close. Mt. Nasura here.
you keen for a burger? heading out later on my motorbike for a blat.
One time, I got high on crack in Italy and fucked these 2 retarded gentlemen. Then I stabbed my dad to death and got arrested before I could hijack a plane and nuke mecca.
Best crack I ever had.
What is your secret?
>I like to fap to girls I know in class
>There aren't really any good pics so I have to dig deep
I work as a cashier. I have a really deep voice. When im in my deep voice i really sound like a threat. So i higher the pitch and now i sound like a flamboyant faggot
i've had gay sex with a teacher a lot of times. i'm not romantically attracted to guys and neither is he, but stuff just happened. i'm embarrassed as hell by it
Had a sexual relationship with my aunt couple years back pic related
Fucked with one girl in tenth grade and she gave me a handjob at the back of science lab.
We fucked everyday in the bathrooms, and she always had a buttplug in her ass, she was crazy.
bmp
I get fucked in the ass more than ten times. With 5 different guys.
I'm sexually attracted to canines.
Why tho?
bymp
That's sick user not the act itself but the fact that it was with a goblin
When I was nine I was kidnapped off the street and repeatedly raped by two men in one of their homes. I escaped and never told anyone.
bmpp
We're you in another secrets thread a few days ago?