Tell me about the time your mom caught you masturbating

tell me about the time your mom caught you masturbating

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youtu.be/-0vPqxSVaG4
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You mean the time I caught my mom masturbating?

that sounds intresting

did you catch her while she caught you fingering your gran with a crane?

many times, they were all on purpouse

She never caught me because I am a fucking ninja and she is so fucked up on prescription pills all the time that I could probably start cumming on the kitchen table before she would even notice.

Purpous wtf?

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if dubs you do it and post video

>be me 12yo
>be in my room naked and beating off to photoshopped Wesley Crusher porn
>mom walks in
>what are you doing? are you masturbating to photoshopped Wesley Crusher porn?
>her clothes fall off
>she pushes a fist into my anus
>elbow deep with no lube
>reaches round and starts into slapping the end of my dick onto the corner of the desk
>my bowel muscles contracting around her forearm
>head of my dick turning purple, throbbing in agony and pleasure as she forces raw spaghetti down my tiny piss hole and flexes the shaft so it breaks into agonizing shards in my urethra
>I'm fantasizing that Wesley is raping me
>mom is calling me a little faggot as her arm works in and out of me, starting to get lubed with my blood and diarrhea
>she starts biting my nipples til they bleed
>edges me for about six hours that way
>finally it's too much
>the rhythmic pulsing in my intestines combines with the agony in my penis, producing the most unimaginably intense orgasm
>I ejaculate about six pints of preteen semen into my hamster's cage, drowning the poor animal
>collapse panting, nearly blacked out from the intensity of the painful orgasm
>blood oozing from my ruined penis and I will never hold be able to my feces in ever again
>she stands over me and releases a torrent of scalding hot urine over me then defecates into my open mouth
>I swallow it down greedily and managed to stammer out the words "thank you so much mom" as she kicks me in the stomach
>before she leaves, she forces the still-twitching corpse of my semen-drenched hamster into my gaping and prolapsed rectum then mashes it to a paste by inserting a baseball bat into me
>I sit up and see all my friends have been watching and taking photos and videos of my torture
>best day ever

Congrats you actually made me want to die.

Bravo, user. 9/10 would read again.

>"thank you so much mom"

lost my shit

that post gave me aids

aye that

>be 13
>new to masturbation and do it regularly
>about 9 one night deep into a video and getting hot and sweaty
>hear mum walking down hallway to say good night so i pull my covers up to cover my sweaty body
>mum kisses me goodnight and notices my temperature and extremely red face and says it too hot for a doona
>tries to pull off my doona but i grab it and pull it to my neck with the strength of 1000 men
>"no i like it hot leave it on"
>mum laughs because she realizes the situation and walks out

My mom never caught but she almost did once. I guess my parents always suspected me of masturbating (just as any other parents out there do with their kids).
I was once laying in my bed doing my job with my room's door open (smart idea I know), when my mom was passing by. As soon as I saw her i got up immediately in a sitting position, hopefully I wasn't naked, my shorts were barely pulled down, enough to leave a small space for my dick.

So she saw me sitting up really fast and I pretended working my abs and she bought it.

the tragedy here is that she probably sneaked into your room while you were sleeping and sucked your dick but you never felt a thing

THIS.
youtu.be/-0vPqxSVaG4

i remember when i read a story where anons mother finished him off after he was caught by his mom fapping

oh boy

here we go

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It certainly wasn't a pleasant experience.

>be 14
>mom says she's gonna go take a nap for an hour
>ihaveanidea.jpg
>I take ice cubes from the kitchen
>back to my room, take all of my clothes off
>I start wanking my cock while I rub the ice on my stomach
>about to cum, moaning quietly
>mom stoms into the room
>too late to stop cumming
>I cover my dick with my hands, but cum leaks under my palms, dripping on my stomach
>''holy jesus, user'', she leaves the room with watery eyes
>that night mom doesn't eat dinner with us, dad says she is sick but I know that she can't look at my face
>dad speaks about protection and std's while we are eating
>mom never storms into my room without knocking again

Greentext

These kids are like fucking 10. These kind of channels need to be under some sort of investigation.

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Holy fuck someone screen cap this, I'm on a phone so can't.

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is it because she is autistic that she doesnt flush it?

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I tributed to her a while back

Was very fun

holy fuck reading that gave me more autism then it helped to defuse

I knew this was gonna end with something fucked up.

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Your seed looks like fucking piss.

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Is that it? Huh, that was... quite the ride, is this a physical book?

Why tribute that one?

Being on a phone screen might have something to do with it

Last one

jesus fucking christ user, seek professional help

Man. If it was that easy to make my parents leave me alone I would have been caught jerking off before.

Because she feels happy and relaxed now user

she caught me.

our eyes locked.

I didn't stop.

right in her eyes.

kept looking and went faster. her eyes didnt move.

finished #wedidnttalkaboutit

#shecheckedoutmycock

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I totally agree. I think its illegal to force and show a fucking dildo to children.

>be me, 13, britbong
>home from school, jacking it
>just took my top off and kept my trousers on for some stupid ass reason
>feels good
>footsteps approaching my room
>quick wank has turned into a spec ops mission
>flip erection into waistband
>its mum
>"whit ye wantin fer tea??" Usual convo, speak for 2 mins
>gives me a really weird look up and down before she leaves
>look down
>dick is sticking out the top of my trousers, very visibly
>rip in pepperoni

Underrated post.
Omg I
Laughed my fucking ass off. Thank you.

Go away, sicko

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>when even your cum can show how pathetic you are

There's a boy version that I'm trying to find a pdf of. It's called "Things Tom Likes". I neeed it.

underrated post. 10/10 m8

kek user

>be britbong
>came home from boarding school early
>imperialism holiday unity day
>avoid Muslims and public transport on way home
>get home and run up the steppy-loos to my room
>parents aren't home from making tea and eating chips yet
>decide to wank to some nasty British smut
>enter my fake govt issue porn certification ID into www.porn.xxx.uk.co
>bought fake porn license since only 18 at the time
>cost 10 quid
>start yanking my trolleywagon to some fucked up shit
>missionary for sole purpose of procreation
>hear knock at door
>"oh shit it's the bobbys"
>fake porn license didn't work
>more banging on door
>try to clean up crumpets
>trip and fall
>tea everywhere
>parents come home to tea and crumpet everywhere
>bobbys waving sticks at me
>"put the winky stick away sir or we'll be forced to bap you on your noggin"
>I didn't resist of course
>those guys have sticks and shit
>bobbys put me in back of lorry
>wish I was a migrant so I could just rape a woman and get away with it

First time:
> Wake up really early most mornings to fap before everyone wakes up.
>Go to a flash adult games website.
>See one about a "concentration game."
>Turns out its Snake with porn pictures flashing in the background.
>Challenge accepted. One handed mode engaged.
>Wasn't going to Fap to this, just use it as warm up, so just lightly stroke my bulge through my sleep pants, while steering with the other hand.
>Super focused.
>Suddenly feel fingers running gently through my hair.
>"Good morning, user. What are you up to?"
>Turn and see my mom.
>Realize closing the browser would be pointless and imply guilt.
>Start laughing. Go for the half-truth... Tell her I was trying a game that slated itself as a concentration game. Turns out the concentration part was naked ladies flashing in the background. (Don't mention that I knew porn would be involved somehow.)
>Keep laughing.
>Mother looks at me oddly, then giggles a bit.
>Gives my hair one last brush with her fingers.
>"Silly boy." She smiles and walks out of the room.
>Was glad at the time, because I stayed covered. Now wondering if I missed out on Wincest... I can explain in part 2.

Thank you lad, this goes straight to my YLYL folder.

its old fam, been capped before
>funii moment pls sav dis 4 me

>be me
>be 11 years old
>use curtains as cum rags because of ignorance of what it is
>stains don't show so continue doing it
>summer comes
>stains start to bleach on the curtains
>rekt.jpg
>mom asks me what those stains are
>said I blow my nose on them because too lazy to get kerchief
>mfw i'm not sure she ever bought that story

Part 2

Fucking kek

if you missed out then how can there be a part 2?

This next bit occurred about two years later, when I moved back home for a bit, before heading to my new job.

Part 2:
>Older now. Masturbating twice a day, since I was jobless. Since I am at home, I have rescheduled my fapping to just before bed, and just after waking up.
>Mother goes to sleep really later... but wakes up really late too.
>Start noticing odd things.
>Couple of times mother has walked in the room while i was stealth masturbating, but I was able to hide enough evidence for plausible deniability. She isn't stupid though.
>Once had door shut, was 1 am. Cock out, fapping furiously. Suddenly think I hear the door to my bedroom close gently. Oh shi-. Sneak up, wait a moment, then gently open the door and pretend I am going to the bathroom. Don't see anyone.
>Lock on the door is really easy to pick. Its the push-pin type, that you can open just by putting a long object in the other side.
> A few times after fapping, notice the pin is out when I could swear I pushed it in.
> One time notice the door is not completely shut after fapping.... Once again know I closed it....
Probably running out of space so continuing in another post.

Face of the question mark guy?

rekt my diafragm

Link pic sauce

That was shorter than I expected...anyway..Continuing on.

> I find my blinds occasionally fucked with and I keep having to fix them. They are always messed with on the side that's kinda tucked into a nook outside, and angled at my chair and computer screen.
>Dad makes a comment about my mother one night. He's not very open about sex, but the comment implies that my mom has been in heat lately.
>Even subtly refers to her biting him one night while they were doing...things.
>About twice, I found my penis outside both my underwear (boxer briefs) and my sleep pants. Not sure if this can occur naturally with multiple nighttime erections.
>Anyway, my theory is that my mom is peaking at me, and getting off on it. And using it to spark up her sex life with dad.
>I am fine with this.
>Except...one time, she says something that makes me think she also knows about my giant collection of mother/son incest porn.
>See, my mother is a giant fucking snoop. If she ever found my computer unlocked, she would totally go through it. And sometimes my computer would not lock after sleep mode for no reason.
>One time she comes back from the gynacologist, and they had kind of done a sort of camera scope inside her vagina.
>I see the folder and ask her what they are.
>She tells me and then says "You wouldn't want to see it.
>Then she pauses, looks over at me, smiles and says "Actually maybe you would. Come over here."
>She takes out the pictures that honestly look like a colonoscopy, but of the inside of her vagina.
>"Just so you know user, this is the closest you can ever get to seeing it."
>Sounds both playful and apologetic to me.
>Puts away pictures, strokes my hair, and goes to the bathroom.

And then I had to move again.

So as I said... Wonder if I missed out.

I don't think I ever truly got caught in the act. You see, firstly, you have to have a plan. Figure out what to do in an emergency situation. Also, you can do an experiment. Turn the sound up or down and go to your parents room as see if you can hear the sound or not. Never underestimate your parents too. They can catch on quickly. Of course, delete history if it is shared device. Don't delete ALL the history though. If you do that then you might as well be wanking right in their faces when they check the history.

No idea. It was one of those sleuthy "Proof of real incest" pics. I have it in my "realistic" incest folder, along with blog posts from a mother that spied on her masturbating son, more blog posts from another mother that got off on flashing her two sons, and several videos of those japanese reality incest shows... Mainly the ones where mother and son are tricked into watching porn together.

>japanese reality incest shows

mother
less
Sup Forumsjap_incest_gameshow

Definitely could have gotten some action. Maybe not all the way, but at least a good wristy/blowie. Shit, if you got that far then going all the way should be easy as fuck.

>she also knows about my giant collection of mother/son incest porn

Become based user

mother-son is alright incest. not my favorite. I prefer bro-sis or cousin-cousin.

mother-son is good for a mom showing her son the ropes and making sure he's never too sexually frustrated but she's gotta let him go eventually to find another woman

bro-sis and cousin-cousin are viable for full-on relationships

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See, the biggest paralysis for trying was mainly that I could rationalize the majority of the stuff.

Like If woke up and my penis was wet with saliva, maybe I would have gone for it.

But I always was out like a light those times. And its entirely possible that maybe after fapping, I didn't "repackage" it properly and it just poked out on its own.

Ive never been caught but id come bome from work sometimes amd she'd be locked in her room. Then whenever she would leave to get my sister from school id look in her draw and usually find that she was using her 8 inch thick as fuck dildo. Theres a chance she knows i look at her stuff and sometimes use her panties to jerk it