What's your secret?

What's your secret?

I want to fuck a tranny

I jerk off smelling the used panties of a woman at work. Get them from her gym bag.

That's nice I would like to try

I eat my boogers, not because I think they're so delicious but just because it's more efficient than finding a trash can or handkerchief if I don't have one. Throwing on the ground is no option cuz I don't wanna step in it. It tastes like nothing who cares.

A good pinch of salt in the water before it boils, and make sure to stir a little bit of the sauce into the pasta once it's cooked and drained to prevent it from sticking.

I went to the hospital because of a broken spine. I said I fell going downstairs but I was sucking my own dick and gone too deep.

They knew

I really want to know what it feels like to shoot someone between the eyes. Not just a random person like a pedo or animal abuser.

Sucking your own cock I wonder what's that's like

they probably knew user

If you get the chance try it man. The opportunity came up and i took it. I jerked it at work and dumped an amazing load right on the fucking floor.

Yeah I'm sure there is a difference between a broken/stuck spine due to a too much tension and just impacts from a fall. Still they writed that and I manage to stop working for 2 months and deflower the mutual insurance from my work.

It's more like sucking a cock then getting your cock sucked. Not worth it.

Managed it a few times at around 11-13 years old

Wow did you clean it up mate

I got my lasagna recipe from the box and tell everyone it is a family recipe

fuck no

I sucked my fuck buddy's roommate's dildo when she was away and my fb went to the gym

It's like your sucking a piece the tip of a dick, the pain from your back will take out every pleasure you could ever have.

Ouch that's gotta hurt not trying that

i lost my virginity at 14 to a 300 pound woman

dont regret it at a l l

Did she had big tits if so I evey you

I tried it when I was 15-17. My flexibility didn't go any better. I went to be able to get the tip + 3 cm then just the tip and now I can't even touch it with my tongue.
Maybe if you're a gymnast, you'll never have any problem.

holy shit dude she had wildly big tits

lil 14 y/o me was amazed

people in hospitals pretty much always know

How old was she ?

16

In 1.5 years I will graduate with an engineering degree debt free and am currently dating a gorgeous blue eyed blond leggy Ukrainian woman yet l think about killing myself almost everyday

Damn a sexy older woman fucking the shit outta me damn I would love that

>woman
>16

haha it was only 2 years

FEEEEEEMALE

Why?

Damn, 16 and already worst than Bibendum. I hope your dick size managed to reach her fat to get your first time.

Well still

she was pretty tall so her fat was more evenly distributed so it didn't have much trouble reaching her

i still think about it a lot because dude it awoke my intense fetish for fat women

Checked

I pretend i'm strong. Everyone thinks that i am the strongest person they ever meet. They think i'm not afraid of everything. But you know, my very secret is that i'm afraid. I'm afraid of a lot of things, i'm afraid to get attached to people (and i counter this by being bold and "bobby the alpha male")

They think i'm strong because i left home with no job and no money, and went north for love. I put everything at stake, i won, i became wealthy and after a year i lost everything. She betrayed me with the only real friend i had since childhood.
Then, i went north. They think i didn't give a fuck, but in fact i ran away. I went north, again, with no job and no money, and here i am now, again, wealthy after 8 months. In good shape, but i feel so empty.
My secret is that i don't know how to live, i just TRY HARD.
My secret is that i'm weak, just as everyone else. Maybe more than everyone. My secret is that i crave for someone to breach my barrier, but i don't think this will ever be possible.

Sorry for the rant Sup Forums, usually i'm a lurker.
pic related.

Once I farted on this guys face while he was asleep, at a party. Turns out he got pink eye a few days later, didn't have any insurance or anything so couldn't get it treated or anything. I guess he tried to use home remedies and stuff but eventually went blind in that eye and had to get it removed.

Never found out I was the one who sharted on his face.

I hate myself

i got pissed at my horse in breath of the wild so i killed it.

There's a good chance Imay have committed some lighttreason

Nice autism

wow

seconded

at 16 i fucked a 300+ pound, short, mentally unstable "gender fluid" chick at my school. I pulled out but a little too late, and i definitely know i shot some cum inside her.

A couple weeks after that she stopped going to school because apparently she tried killing herself and got sent to a mental hospital. It's been 3 years, and I've since moved for college. I still wonder if I have a kid somewhere.

that's where I've been going wrong all these years

HAHA NIGGA OMG

kek

Thanks bro
pic related, good old days

Welche Website ist das. Es tut mir leid, dass ich kein Englisch verstehe

I would like to fuck a tranny, as I would love the opportunity to suck a dick and have the feeling of cum in my throat and also the feeling of being fucked in the ass until we both cum. Tranny because I want a cock but would feel weird being with an actual guy as I'm not attracted to males (e.g. could never be in a relationship with one)

Tranny are sexy and for one I don't think they are males. As female they just get a penis crated but are still girls. I fuck a tranny as well :-)

turned neighbors younger daughter into my fucktoy

Michael Blume

How did you do it? Do tell

Also me:
>Went to boarding school for sixth form (16-18 yrs old)
>in my boarding house was a guy who had been at the school for like 10 years
>became his first proper friend, so that's saying something
>he then came out as gay and massively depressed to me
>needless to say I was a big part of his life
>He often tried to be weirdly intimate with me like cuddling before bed and kissing (a peck) goodnight which I was really not down for, but he kept trying to make it seem as if this was really normal
>Anyway, start of upper sixth (17 yrs old) I started dating a girl at the school
>we'd both been really good friends with her and would watch AHS together etc
>after a while of him being fine, he started getting mad jealous, and started being really off with her

My wife and I are way kinkier in the bedroom than people think, externally my wife is the perfect model wife but in the bedroom there isn't much she hasn't dont either with me or in the past or wants to do in the future. I can list the stuff she wants to do or has done if there is interest. Pic related its her. I think its crazy hot being married to the perfect woman and her being a total nympho in secret i couldn't be luckier.

You don't want your feet or shoes touch the booger. So you put it in your mouth???
You filthy pig

You homos should come to Thailand, you can't swipe more than 2 profiles in Tinder without coming across a legit looking Ladyboy

she comes from a very very poor family, my neighbor is a fuck up, she drinks a lot and all the money he earns goes to booze, his wife must work two lame-payed jobs just to get the house running, so the girls (2 of them) are left on their own.
they go to school whenever they want, they do whatever they want, they don't have any authority in life.
the youngest one caught my attention when she was at my place several times to play with my puppies that i was giving away for free.
since then i called her to come and play with them whenever i saw her passing by.
i was always there for her, we talked, played, joking around and jokes where usually with sexual innuendo.
i noticed she liked that like every girl her age, and that was the point.
after some time she started opening to me, how she lives hard and they don't have the money.
so i started giving her money like a gesture, very small ammounts so she can't say no if i am very pushy.
after some time i started buying her some stuff.
clothes, some things for school, so we became a very good friends but she always kept it low cuz i am 33 which is just two years younger than her father.
she started coming to my place more often and since she hit the puberty i was the one supporting her to embrace the bad girl inside she was.
i bought some booze several times,and told her that we can do this whenever she wants but only two of us alone, cuz that way she will be more up in front of the kids her age.
i bought her cigs she started smoking. i am a smoker to so we just sat there, drank some beer and smoked a whole pack for the night.
it was the coolest thing for her.
and every time she was a little drunk i was able to turn the party on the playing and fun side.
so we would tickle, wrestle and do stuff like that, where i could touch her and feel her body.

Lol omg well a tranny is still considered a woman. The only difference is that they think that they are the opposite sex so they get sex changes which is complete bullshit and they get a penis created but physically mentally they are still female so no homo. Can't be if a person is born a gender even if you get a penis or a vagina created you are still that gender regardless of what you have

after several times she noticed what i was doing but played along..........
......cuz every now and then she took some money from me i guess her thoughts were "well i can return in some sort and he is a good friend"
exactly my intention.
after some time i started touching her more often, even when she is not drunk, and i saw she wasn't into it at all so i told her while hugging her to put a

hand in my back pocked.
she did and found a phone i bought for her.
the smile and her face was crazy wide and she hugged me strong, so i used the chance to kiss her neck and lick it with my tongue.
now she let me do that too.....
i knew the money can do stuff with her.
my hands were all over her body that night and i didn't go down but played with her nips over her shirt.
since she knew this was nothing that bad, in fact from her breathing i knew she likes it a lot.
after some time ,several games, rubbing over pants and stuff like that passed before letting me dryhump her.
i came in my pants so many times, i took her hand several times and place it on my hard cock while it was hard.... and also after when i cum, just to make

her curious and feel my wet junk, and what she is doing to me.
it took me two weeks more with dryhumping and some more money to finally fuck her.......
she has the tightest pussy ever, and i was her first.........

Cont.
>Before he started being weird about her though
>one evening, her and I were at a disco type thing at the school
>he doesn't come because antisocial as fuck
>I think I get slightly tipsy
>she then goes home at the end of the night, I go back to boarding house
>I get back and he comes in to ask how it was
>suggests we have a few drinks (guess he had vodka stashed in his room)
>"yeah, why not"
>I think we start doing shots, but he seems to not be having as much as me
>soon enough I'm really fucking drunk and he's still very in control
>starts kissing me
>me being drunk as fuck I don't think otherwise
>he feels horrible to kiss - just really scrawny, thin guy
>we get naked and he takes me into my ensuite
>gets me in the shower, making out
>eventually we get out and he gets me on the toilet and starts sucking my cock
>"I knew you'd be big, user"
>I guess I eventually cum, then do the same for him
>he dries me off then I pass out in bed
>the next day we say nothing, don't even see each other the next morning I think

Usually when people say tranny they mean a man to woman. It seems that in Thailand, nearly all gay guys become trannies, aka Ladyboys. They are everywhere. Plastic surgery and boob jobs are cheap here. Many of them look like real women, if you don't know what to look for.

If you're gay with an angel, god kills you.

Hooking up with my friend behind both our significant others backs and I'm pretty sure I'm in love with her but I don't know how to say it.

I raped a cat

Those are the rules: If you try to be gay with an angel or you're gay with an angel, God kills you and not the angel. Anyone could be an angel.

do tell user

it's been like three and a half years i think, since i am fucking this lil cutie and because of me and stuff i bought and taught her..... she looks like this

today.
nobody knows this about us, and the fact i am the reason she is like this now, i mean, at least we try to keep it low, but recently she is at my place more

often, sleeps over for 2 or 3 days and stuff like that. almost like a proper relationship.

Cont:
>During much of the rest of that year, he becomes more of a cunt to my girlfriend, but never really says anything about it to me
>doesn't seem to understand why that's why I'm becoming more distant from him
>A few days before the end of upper sixth year, the boys in our boarding house suggest we have a leaving drinks sesh
>sure thing
>one night at 11ish, go to a friend's dorm and start drinking poorly mixed vodka so very strong
>soon I'm hammered
>only remember snippets of that evening
next thing I know him and I force each other into my room making out (nobody knows of course)
>feels horrible still
>numb from drunkness
>what the fuck am I doing
>he's sucking me off on my bed and I pretend to pass out
>"hello user, I'm trying to make you cum"
>no reaction, so he climbs on top of me and starts wanking over me until he cums on my chest, then leaves
>the sick cunt
>next morning I'm horribly hungover
>don't see him all day
>neither of us talk about it or really look at each other

It was my neighbor's cat (it just roamed around the hood eating shit) and the owner was being a cunt so I said shut up or I'll rape your cat. Long story short, the cat got dicked.

i hate my mentally retarded brother and cant wait until he's fully out of my life/ in an institution.

I wear thongs to work and I'm a male construction worker.

>school finishes and he tries to get in touch once over summer but he's been such an asshole to my gf and in general that I don't reply
>"I don't see why I bother, user"
>gf and I go to same uni together in september
>a few weeks in, our friend from school comes to stay for a weekend
>tells my gf she's been in contact with him and he's been saying really nasty shit about her, and a bit about me
>I send him a long message baso saying how dare you, you cunt, and we all block his ass on everything we can think of
>don't hear anything from him for like a month or two
>gf and I go to see two friend's in other city and stay over the night, me with one friend, her with the other
>next morning she seems really anxious/spaced out
>we catch the train and she shows me a message from him saying "me and user slept together twice"
>ohfuckwhatdoifuckingdo.jpg
>I say I don't know what he's talking about
>we narrow it down to those two nights that I got mega drunk with him
>I look really emotional and she suggests it could be rape
>I agree
>everything is better and we don't break up because of it - seems to make us stronger
>we're still together and I've told nobody apart from Sup Forums the truth

What are your thoughts? Am I in the wrong?

I'm an Asian with a 4 inch penis and I've been on hormone therapy for the last year and a half. I've been whoring myself out to random strangers for money as a part time job.

You have a big dick for an asian

Spill the beans on this slut

STOP REPOSTING THIS SHIT OVER AND OVER YOU PIECE OF SHIT

It's disposed of this way is the point. Also it comes from me.

Not in a racist way but I'd be more keen on a western one

Damn good cup of troll..

Asian boipussy belongs to the BWC.

White boi don't mean racist ways
Reeee
Find your inner love
Reeee

why, is my story, stfu

Get the fuck outta here cuck. You no nothing of China me hate you long time.

Straight from the top of my dome, as i rock rock rock rock rock the microphone...

You don't put a pinch, you make it as salty as sea water. And you always wait until the water is boiling before adding the salt. Otherwise, the salt just sits on the bottom and you get little pits over time.

It's not that big. I knew other Asian guys with way bigger ones.

I agree.

I meet Nigerian princess. I send Facebook message. We talk many months until she send nudez so I FedEx money order 100 dillar every week. We love each others very much. We talked for 3 weeks. My wife no no but I want to buy palne Ticket for her. I ask her to come to Alabama with me. She say we must take it slow maybe later she come. Have I been catfishes? Every day we Skype on microphone so I know she has none of cock but I think she don't love me as much as I want her so what should I do. I want her here please b/ help me

How old was she when you started?

Agreed. I could do it, but it'd hurt my back like a motherfucker. And I'd end up with either a mouthful of cum or cum all over the place.

kek

White boi sucks dick
Reeeeee

Make me bitch. You know nothing of the great one.

wut

15

35 year old virgin. Life fucking sucks.

Fuckig liberal cunt shove off