be me

> be me
> lawful good paladin
> find out about evil death cult
> not on my watch you niggers
> they plan on sacrificing a virgin to some death god or some shit idk
> sneak into temple
> find virgin sacrifice
> make conversation
> she wants to be sacrificed
> the fuck?! This bitch must be charmed or something
> use my unreasonably high charisma to reason with her
> she has none of it
> party tries to convince me to just kill her
> I consider it but I just can't kill this young girl
> I have only one option left
> I rape the shit out of her
> everyone horrified irl
> mfw

You saved that young maiden's life user

Keep doing your god's work

Thank you kind sir

> lawful good paladin
> I rape the shit out of her

Huh.

They can't sacrifice her if she isn't a virgin.

His other options were to kill her or let her get sacrificed to a death god

Rape saves lives

My thoughts exactly! I argued with the DM for like 20 minutes about it.

Or fight the cult.

>Rape saves lives

Won't even try to argue that.

I don't want to kill anyone if I don't absolutely have to.

Use your bare fists and knock them out.

They have fucking magic!

Sounds to me like you are making excuses to break your alignment faggot.

Could have abducted the girl

bump

I considered that but I didn't think I could make it.

Should have rolled for divine intervention and had your god save you

Well I have an int score of 6.

Holy shit no wonder you couldn't persuade her. You could barely form a fucking sentence. Doesn't matter if your charisma is 25 if you are just grunting and pointing.How do you even use a weapon?

Slowly...

That is ridiculously low for a paladin. I thought 8 or 9 was the base requirement. That is fucking hilarious

Yeah lol It's why he is named Robert Downey jr.

How big is the party you play with?I miss playing D&D with 6 or so people. I just don't care enough for it anymore. If you don't have premade characters turning up to a campaign, you spend all fucking night making characters.

5 in the party total. Yeah everyone makes there shit before they show up.

I love all that shit, its just so time consuming. I feel guilty afterwards, like I wasted an evening.

Its the same with Warhammer and anything else along those lines. The games are hella fun, but massively time consuming and make me feel guilty

Dungeons and Dragons doesn't have a consequentialist moral system you faggot. You broke alignment regardless of what the outcome was. Your DM is a little bitch if he gave in and you're a faggot rules lawyer who would never play in my game again.

I get that. I really only like DnD but I try to only play with people that know how to play. 5e is pretty quick paced compared to 4 though.

Well I wouldn't play in your game because you sound like a faggot. Like the type of DM who has to kill everyone's characters because he can't cum without fulfilling his faggoty power fantasy.

did you have to rape her with such a high charisma though?

You literally don't understand how the game mechanics of your chosen class work. The paladin is the most restrictive class in the game, it's not an excuse for edgy faggots like you to be argumentative and try to find moral loopholes. Rape is evil, period. I wouldn't kill your character but you'd fall from paladin grace fast as fuck.

To be fair one could make the argument that with his low intelligence score he misunderstood the ways of the faith and made a lapse in judgement as to what was good.

Pretty sure it is less evil than murder.

I think she was charmed or maybe crazy or something idk but I couldn't convince her of shit.

No. You could not make that argument.

Pretty sure you don't understand how morality works at all. It wouldn't hold up in a court of law much less the fucking Dungeons and Dragons paladin's moral code.

>be me
>Anti social elf ranger in a party of social butterfly's who won't shut up
>we also have a half elf bars
>campaign is going very good, meet up with a zombie anti paladin with an ice sword
>in typical bard fashion
>"I roll to seduce the antipaladin zombie"
>dm allows it, even though both of us being experienced d&d plyers know you can't seduce undead
>he crits
>my ranger is the only one in the party that failed the role
>mfw my ranger has a slow but growing attraction to the bard

The rest of the party already planned the wedding

Why could you not make that argument? His low intelligence he didn't understand the well defined parameters of good and evil and thought that this was the least evil course of action. It fits perfectly.

I'm sorry I didn't realize you were the arbiter of reality. I apologize.

Hahahaha!

Yeah, you're a grade A cunt
You're not wrong. Just a raging no fun cunt. So I guess enjoy being right and lording over a dnd table.

>you might not even be right but arguing with cunts like you is too tedious.

From the SRD:

Code of Conduct

A paladin must be of lawful good alignment and loses all class abilities if she ever willingly commits an evil act.

Additionally, a paladin’s code requires that she respect legitimate authority, act with honor (not lying, not cheating, not using poison, and so forth), help those in need (provided they do not use the help for evil or chaotic ends), and punish those who harm or threaten innocents.


D&D and other fantasy worlds do not use subjective, consequentialist morality. This is an absolute fact. There are actual deities and actual specific alignments assigned to specific acts. There is some wiggle room but not enough for this faggot's story. Also I'm pretty sure that never happened and he's just telling a made up story for attention because he doesn't have enough friends to play D&D.

I've played D&D for almost my entire life and I've never met anyone retarded enough to accept this argument. It's not about being the arbiter of reality. It's about this loser's fake story being completely full of shit just like his reasoning. "6 Int means I can get away with rape!"

Man, fuck bards
>no really, fuck them

I wouldn't rage over the table, I'd handle it easily: the paladin falls from grace, the alignment changes to lawful neutral, and we move on. No arguments out of character over bullshit that doesn't matter.

There is more than enough wiggle room in that definition for an act of stupidity thinking it is good.

...

A paladin cannot even tell a lie to save a life. Literal Kant-level moral requirements. If you don't like it, play a different class. Paladins are weak anyway. This is just grand standing and trying to impress others with an annoying faggot argument.

I see nothing about rape in your rules.

Pretty sure if the paladin was stupid enough they could give misinformation unintentionally though.

>don't want to start another argument but,

No class in D&D is really weak. They all have their specific strengths and weaknesses, and it also is based on how the player plays the character.

>I see nothing about rape in your rules.

You're a retard.

Yes, willingness is a core part. Mind control, mistaken info, etc are all valid excuses, but "it was for the greater good that I raped her so she wouldn't get sacrificed" doesn't count as it is a completely willing act.

>tedious cunt can't even English
Lord over a table
>I wouldn't rage.
>I played dnd all my life (and spend the rest on the chans)
Fuck right back off you fa/tg/uy. We are just shit talking here and you're cunting it all up. Just start all your future posts with "well, actually..." so we know what sort of shit stain we are dealing with.

We have been ranking classes by power levels for a long time. Paladins are bottom tier in the PHB and are objectively weaker than fighters. The only class as weak as the paladin is the monk. If you disagree you are wrong.

However, all classes are fun and a good DM compensates.

Telling bullshit stories to impress Internet strangers is a horribly pathetic act worthy of mockery and derision.

...

It is a willing act, but he was stupid enough to believe it the lesser of two evils, and the only way to save her. This brings up the debate of is an act evil inherantly, or evil because of Intention. If its based off intention then he was harmless.

That doesn't disprove my argument.

>obvious bait taken
>fish on

"Lesser of two evils" is irrelevant. A paladin cannot commit any evil act, period. There is no balancing of evils to make an excuse. It really is that simple. If you want more flexibility, play a Knight, which is in the splat books.

Evil acts are evil, period. D&D is not consequentialist.

Continue to police the Internet good sir. Defend your fine game. Surely you will be triumphant.

"The only way to protect the magic is to defile the magic. Thus is the way of LGM."

I was triumphant when I arrived. At least I can keep the same stable group of friends to play with without rules lawyer crybaby tryhard nonsense ruining the game.

If he was stupid enough to not see an alternative, and thought that her being sacrificed to the evil god was the evil path, then its not evil.Intensely misguided though

Yes, but D&D is all about player action and choice.

If you roleplay, make great rolls, and have good weapons and armor the power rating doesn't mean shit.

You haven't proven that rape is evil.

Life is hard for a paladin. Trying to attack them would have been the only correct choice. Alternatively, run away and look for help. Paladins are not intended to avoid all bad things happening -- failing to stop an evil act is not an evil act. Do you even moral theory?

My dub dubs cannot be challenged you nigger.

Do you even low intelligence misinterpreting things.

I have a theoretical degree in that.

Congrats. But you still sound like a raging insufferable cunt. I'm glad you have people who put up with it. Do try to stay in your lane and leave the rest of us the fuck alone.

At no point is interpretation relevant. I can tell you've never played D&D. Rape is evil. "Willingly commit an evil act" does not require that the actor believe the act to be evil. End of story.

The only insufferable cunt is the "HA HA MY PALADIN COMMITS A RAPE BECAUSE IT'S ACTUALLY A GOOD ACT" loser who would be immediately banned from the game for arguing about the ruling so that reasonable people can play in peace.

Can you prove it?

Jumping in here.


He probably shouldn't have picked a paladin, because he is lawful good. What he did wasn't necessarily evil, because she has to be a virgin to sacrificed (the rape made her not a virgin)

That would be a lawful evil charactwr

>"6 Int means I can get away with rape!"
Europeans think this is fine, shown via their refugee friends.

Lol at your anger son. #sad

Would have been a FANTASTIC switch over moment for his paladin to become a fallen paladin and become lawful neutral. The act itself isn't completely irrational. It's just not Good and paladins would lose their powers for doing it.

>
>My thoughts exactly! I argued with the DM for like 20 minutes about it.

Just in case anyone needs proof that OP is actually an insufferable cunt himself, he admitted it. Arguing with the DM for 20 minutes is immediate permanent ban from the table.

Yeah fair enough. I would be fine with this honestly. I was mad because it felt like he was trying to keep me from doing it.

Not if I'm right twat basket.

Or the guy who types "I was triumphant when I arrived". That weapons grade douche canoe.

Notice, I never said you were wrong. You just suck. Your delivery is pure cunt. Seriously, screen cap this thread and go be a fa/tg/uy. Just go and stay go.

The DM shouldn't have stopped you from doing it. He should have laid down the law of consequences. Both of you are retards.

But you're not right. You're wrong. DM's word is law anyway and if you don't like it pack your shit up and leave. People like you ruin D&D groups.

Yeah, I'm being a dickhead. I've dealt with people like OP one too many times in my actual experience as a DM to bother being nice. Fuck this loser and fuck everyone like him.

I saved her life. *mic drop*

Yes, you did. You saved her life by committing an evil act. Congrats on saving her life. You still lose your powers, end of story.

>*mic drop*

Seriously? I tried to see the reason behind your actions but I think the other guy is right.

You are an insufferable douche and should be kicked out of your party

Yeah but I didn't though ;)

Then your DM is even more of a cuck faggot than you are. I'm glad you're happy with one another.

Arguing like an autistic retard until people give up because they want to keep playing the game is not the same as being right. Maybe when you learn that, people will respect you.

I think all of you take a table top rpg too seriously. Most groups bend the rules a little bit so some can have more fun experience, while others go by the book entirely. Both settings are for different people. I run a few groups and one side is the one where we do dumb shit and fuck around, and the other is where we keep our serious campaigns. I would have allowed the raping to occur in the fuck around one, but if it occurred in my serious campaign he'd fall from Grace as a paladin, no question to it. I wouldn't kick him out, I'd show him that his actions have consequences, and I'd probably make the raped girl kill herself afterwards to make his action even worse.

A good DM can roll with that, a bad one resorts to kicking players out.

Well fuck you cunt! I'm so serious! I'm obviously not just fucking with this faggot! I could never do that.

In all seriousness though it was a retarded move. However I was playing a retard and it made me laugh. I got annoyed when I got walled off.

Does he not know it's just a game? You play to have fun, not argue over rules you fucking autist

This is what I would have done as well. You fall from grace, maybe atone later, but this whole "argue for 20 minutes" bullshit he admitted to earlier IS sufficient grounds for being booted. I hope you wouldn't have put up with it.

This guy gets it.

You've never played a tabletop game before. If you want to play casual stuff, there is plenty more to play. Paladins are not morally flexible. Period.

While I agree here some groups play by strict rules. Those are the groups where nothing fun ever happens. Like you know the stories where someone suplexes a dragon, or rolls to fuck an orc. His games aren't those games.

There are objectively superior systems for people who want to play a game like that. I am a rules nerd for D&D because that's part of the point. You can't just violate the fucking rules for the paladin code of conduct.

We have played some batshit insane games of All Flesh Must Be Eaten though. Those rules are *explicitly* super loose.

Which SRD? If he was playing 5e, he has to stick to his oath and possibly some more specific religious rules, but there's no alignment restriction

I'm not saying its bad to play by rules. I just know to keep two separate campaigns for that express purpose. I know people want to play a tabletop to have a giggle and then the same people sometimes want to get together for a serious quest. My group meets every week and we swap between depending on how we feel. I've played paladin and I understand there is a strict ideology to follow. I would understand being pissed at someone for picking that class then acting like that in a serious campaign.

I'm not saying your games are bad for being serious, I'm just saying the crazy d&d stories that a lot of people see don't come from serious games. They come from ones where rules are bent a bit.

That was from 3.5. I know the rules are a bit more lax in 5e but he specifically said he was lawful good, so it should still apply (rape is a no-no).

First off I would have had him fall from grace too and have to atone to get his paladin abilities back as well. I might have even had his evil act in a temple of evil summon a minor avatar or demon of said evil god because hell a Paladin just commit an evil act in that gods name effectively. That said it really depends on the type of game they're running. In some D&D game paladins might have home brew rules that make there code far less absolute, think game of thrones.

This game is gay and so are you.

We handled that by switching to All Flesh Must Be Eaten. Get stoned with the whole group and play zombie tabletop games where crazy shit happens and the rules are pretty relaxed by design. D&D just seems way too complex to play any other way.

Inaction is an action thus being evil fuck off cunt and go back to the trolley question