You have the chance to time travel back to the year 1017... you can take ONE item from modern day

You have the chance to time travel back to the year 1017... you can take ONE item from modern day.
I would take a radio to bamboozle the people I meet with the music and voices trapped in the box!
What would /b take?

god damnit .... SAGE

Fidget spinner.

You are a fucking idiot, there wouldn't be any radio broadcasts for it to pick up faggot.

>implying it can pick up future transmissions

b8

>says sage
>didn't sage

A munitions press
Guns are easy, its ammo thats the hard part

This

Oops forgot pic

i bring back donald trump with me

I'd bring an AC-130 back with me and teach them newbs the meaning of air superiority.

We need more specifics. Do we just travel back to 1017 and stay in our current location?

You'd be burned at the stake for witch craft nigga

Good point.
Medieval Olde London town in England.

wat do when out of butane, which is roughly 5000 flicks

You really think you could build a rifle that fires metallic cartridges from scratch?

Also, if you have the press where do you get cartridge grade brass, or gunpowder?

They already know the secret of fire, you bitch ass.

...

You got one

you think there were radio stations back then ?

The correct answer is time machine you fucking faggots

Alright cool.

I bring back a compendium of knowledge. Start small with shit like hooking the Saxon king up with running water and distilled alcohol.

Gain some trust. Start building infrastructure with all that peasant labor. Put up windmills and waterwheels, teach them gears and belt transmission of power. Tell them about all that coal in wales. Start the industrial revolution 800 years early.

Maybe its a magic one.
It picks up 2017 stuff?

Solar powered computer jam packed with a fuckton of info on how to make anything and everything

I likes the cut of yer jib matey...

Vikings promptly rape and murder you to steal your magic jew box.

The time machine.
>Durr can't take that
1 300lb slab of gold then.

I'm a gift from your God's to help your people. Actually scratch that I am your god incarnate.

If he could get some pipe and rubber he could. The hard part would be welding it.

Spaniards tried that too you know. Eventually you do something wrong and have to kill them all.

You land in a shit covered field full of peasants.

Your giant ball of gold sinks into the mire of horse shit and dirt.

Angry peasants are upset you crushed their cabbages.

You are drawn, quartered, and eaten by starving serfs.

Years later your gold is found, and promptly delivered to the king, who squanders it in a war against France.

There's no such thing as steel pipe then though, or rubber.

The best you might be able to do is make a muzzle loading firearm, and hopefully try to improve along the way.

I'd bring nothing

Gray's. Sports. Almanac.

>Hardmode.wad

What are you, stupid? Exactly which radio station will you tune into in 1017?

Ur mom

>bring mp3 player with speaker
>position self in the woods and play spoopy black metal whenever somebody is around
>a myth is born

Better thought:

What if you did pick something up from an alien ship/planet/probe in orbit.

Aliens arrive, are total bros, uplift human civilization.

Back to the future reference?

Ide bring my waifu

They would all be jelly and pay me for her company

>profit?

You rent the harlot to all the various sheep fucking locals, who are delighted to get to fuck something slightly less hairy and shit covered than Eorwine the ewe behind a briar bush.

OP's desperate slut of a mother is also delighted to be pumped by so many cocks, and since it's the age before std's, she is free to get plowed like a wessex barely field.

However, the church objects to you selling pink canoe to the benighted serfs, and they kidnap you in the dead of night. Nobody notices, they are too busy raping OP's mom in exchange for cabbages.

You are tortured in a crofters barn for a week, by an apprentice torturer who doesn't quite have it all down. Mostly he just crushes your cock in a mailed fist over and over. You start to think he likes it.

After a week of cock crushing, you are shriven, and become a monk. You die a month later of cock related injuries.

Same goes for anything you take, electronics would die, guns run outta bullets etc

Not hand held instant fire, not too bright are you?

Centerfire cartridges can be cast out of steel, can use blackpowder (the reason we use smokeless is to lessen cleaning frequency) and could be made at a blacksmith's forge
Primer could be made out of a thirds mixture of ground flint, steel and powder, and if not you could use nitrogen rich soil for making Nitroglycerine

Andy Sixx's shit log

It's 1017. I don't think anyone had the ability to draw and anneal steel cases.

Gunpowder also hasn't migrated to the west, but you could probably experiment and figure out how to make black powder.

Nitroglycerin primer is a good way to get dead, and the flint and steel mix probably wouldn't work.

What you could do is maybe cast copper cartridges, but without fulminates for the primer you don't have an ignition sources.

Body armour, people would think you're invincible, unless you take an arrow to the knee.

Blackpowder is a mixture of Charcoal and Potassium Nitrate, with sulfur acting as a catalyst. Potassium Nitrate, also known as Saltpetre was a common household chemical used for cleaning and cooking, if need be you can souce it by straining piss through a mound of grass. Charcoal is obvious, and while sulphur isn't nessesary, although it was availiable during those times
As for the inabillity to cast shells, do remember that since i chose to a bring a munitions press i could just cast 12 gauge slugs using steel, and it'll be as simple as casting piping or other cylindrical objects.

Almost forgot
5 parts potassium nitrate, to 3 parts aluminium powder, to 2 parts sulphur makes a flash powder for use as Primer

Potassium nitrate is a common chemical now, not in 1017. But you could manufacture it.

Charcoal and sulphur are self explanatory like you said.

Any steel shell you manage to cast is going to be very heavy and cumbersome, and likely split when used.

Cartridges aren't cast, their drawn in stages. You would need a softer metal to make it work in 1017. The steel back then is just too shit and the metallurgy just isn't there to make it work, unless you introduce it, which means building the steel industry from scratch.

just the knee? not the eye?
dumb ass

How do you plan to extract aluminum without electricity?

Aluminum is not a natually occurring ore. You have to extract it from bauxite and part of that process requires electRica current.

Hows about 50/50 KNO3 and Mg

Skyrim reference that went right over your head.

How about a solar charged phone?

That would definitely work.

Cartridges could be made from copper or brass.

Make copper primers lined with fulminate of mercury.

Lead bullets are pretty easy.

You would have to design a mechanism for the rifle's action, but some experimentation would work that out.

You could give them a breach loading single shot rifle like the Martini-Henry and change the whole course of history.

Who would you call though?

I'd probably compile and execute programs on it to build stuff, and also read some ebooks on hot to create generators.

Then I'd settle by a river and generate hydroelectricity.

Then I'd produce advance grade weaponry, and build other stuff like tractors and shit.

Get a community around me which can defend itself.

Teach them how to make guns and stuff.

Then take over the world and set up a single world government.

Then I'd proceed to elliminate the people who hold our civilization back; ie. jews [by their greed] and nignogs[by their retardation] and only Aryans and Dravidians would finally remain.

>compile and execute programs
Why a phone and not a pc?

The only way to live my entire life accounting for all the faggots who would be ready to kill me for such a device would be to not let anyone know I have it in the first place.

The power requirements make a PC obnoxious as in it would take a much larger solar charger in the middle ages. Even if it were a laptop I'd lose out on mobility too and in some situations it would be impossible to defend.

A phone on the other hand, I could conceal inside my assole if the situation demands it.

I would be able to use it much more than a bc I can carry it around. Don't have to leave it some place so that it doesn't get sabotaged or stolen or shit like that.