HOLY SHIT GUYS I JUST FUCKED MY FIRST HOOKER

HOLY SHIT GUYS I JUST FUCKED MY FIRST HOOKER.

>be me
>26 year old faggot who works uber
>3am, feeling stressed
>take 30 min break
>see hooker in some shit part of Brooklyn
>"oh shit what do I do? Is it like gta v?"
>sit and park a few feet away
>"maybe she'll come up to me"
>keep waiting
>she just looks at me
>"shit I should just do it"
>Honk
>she hops in
>"so uhhhhhhh.... You got the wrap?"
>"give me a dollar I'll get it from the corner store"
>she comes back
>"so you know any good spot?"
>yes baby just make a U-turn and make a right, into that nice dark spot"
>park
>"Holy shit this is next to a school. What will happen if I'm caught? Will I get arrested? Will my car get towed? I've never done anything this bad... I've always been a good boy..."
>sweat a little
>unzip
>put on condom
>"so you going to pay me or what baby?"
>"oh shit what if she runs away with my money?"
>risk it
>pay her $20
>she hops on my dick and rides like a champ, car is shaking
>get on top of her till I cum
>throw the condom and wrapper on the sidewalk
>drop her off a few blocks away
>"I'm always around here whenever you need me baby"
>oh shit I just fucked a prostitue... In real life... Holy shit... Holy shit...."

Other urls found in this thread:

cdc.gov/condomeffectiveness/brief.html
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

Post a picture of your STI collection

And not just any hooker, a classy $20 hooker. Good for you.

On the bright side you will stop getting those pesky American Red Cross "please donate blood to save a life" phone calls

Yup I was paranoid she was a cop... She said "you want head or sex?

I said" the second option"

She said 20.

Lol

>what is a condom

Have you fags ever heard of a condom?

how did you resist strangling her?

Did you kiss her?
>ew
What did she smell like

Condoms do not protect against most STIs (HPV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, condyloma), they just prevent pregnancy.

The closest I got to touching her was when I asked if I can grab her tits, she said my hand was cold. I grabbed them anyway lol. Bitch better give me my $20's worth.

She smelled like Irish spring soap. Hell nah I didn't kiss her, can't bring myself to that lol. She sucked mad dick for sure

cdc.gov/condomeffectiveness/brief.html

>Condoms can be expected to provide different levels of protection for various STDs, depending on differences in how the diseases or infections are transmitted. Male condoms may not cover all infected areas or areas that could become infected. Thus, they are likely to provide greater protection against STDs that are transmitted only by genital fluids (STDs such as gonorrhea, chlamydia, trichomoniasis, and HIV infection) than against infections that are transmitted primarily by skin-to-skin contact, which may or may not infect areas covered by a condom (STDs such as genital herpes, human papillomavirus [HPV] infection, syphilis, and chancroid).

Clearly you have never given blood. They literally ask:
"Have you ever had sex with someone for money, paid money for sex, or engaged in sec with someone you know has taken money for sex, even once?"

>condoms protect against stds contracted via skin contact at the pelvis where they don't cover
>condoms are 100% effective where they do cover

Wew lad. It's better than nothing, but not without the risk of changing your life forever.

You're an idiot. They protect against STDs and pregnancy. Unless you're a retard who can't out on a condom correctly... Or order a magnum when you have a 3 in pencil dick.

Go to sleep pope

Hell yeah, bro. congrats!

>shit

HOLY SHIT YOU HAD TO PAY FOR SEX LOL

You know what OP, congrats for you. Some don't pay and still don't get pussy.

Says the neckbeard virgin

Fucked my first hooker at 17, 35 now and probably fucked over 200.

OP ur a huge pussy faggot. U probably got aids because $20 is extremely cheap for a hooker of any quality. U just banged a ghetto crackhead hoodrat.

Damn. She cheap af.

You seriously pay more than 20 dollars for a quick 5 min fuck? Holy shit you're sad. It should cost no more than 50 max. You got ripped off or probably fuck some entitled craigslist whore lmao

What is the connection between money, sex and STDs?

If I give my girlfriend money after having sex with her, am I more likely to get a STD?

20 bucks for a warm hot pussy. Worth.

Where in Brooklyn?

Congrats pal, you're an adult now. But 20 bucks?! That's very cheap! Was she a black whore?

Intersection of Sumpter st and rockaway ave

yeah, money is dirty

>Be 21
>always telling friends about how cool it would be to bang a hooker
>1 friend is constantly bashing on the idea
>"it's not cool if you HAVE to pay for sex. it's sad"
>shrug it off every time
>go to thailand with group of 6, including the anti prostitute mindset friend
>spend next to nothing fucking 10/10 south east asian model quality women (japs, thais, russians, etc)
>even fuck a few for free
>anti prostitute friend spends the entire time trying to find hookups on tinder for free because it's the"cool and honorable" thing to do
>mfw thailand tinder is literally 90% ladyboy prostitutes

good on you, OP. anyone who says it's sad to pay for sex is a walking talking fedora.

dumbass nigger. read the fucking text, he said he used a fucking condom. you know what your parents should have used not to have you.

But.... Where is the picture? You know the rule buddy... Picture or fake story

>anyone who says it's sad to pay for sex cannot afford it
> ftfy

I'll make a video my second time and post it here.
Thank you, finally someone who's not an illiterate faggot

I was gonna say all curable but I've never heard of this one...
>chancroid
Googled. OMG! Curable or not that shit's terrifying!

Congrats. Now, let's hope the school security cameras didn't get your license plate. I doubt they did care though but publix.sex at a school is generally frowned upon. Hopefully she doesn't go there.

True that man. I also went to Thailand... Pattaya and Bangkok. But I didn't fuck any ladyboys or prostitutes sadly since I was always with my gf and it was a vacation.

I didn't get caught and am now safely home. High doubt they're going to review footage at 3am. Plus my windows are tinted.

But I wonder what would happen if I were caught

If for any reason they were able to get your plate, you'd arrested, the judge would put you on probation, and then you'd be put on the sex offender list if this was a first time offense

So did you get head or have sex? I thought it was one or the other.