How do you get sex, Sup Forums?

How do you get sex, Sup Forums?

exchange money & gifts for pussy

CRINGE

You buy it in the Supermarket
right next to the produce

/thread

tell my gf we're about to have sex

Yall so basic.

>How do you get sex, Sup Forums?

Move to Germany and have five euros ready.

OR: Move to Germany and walk into a Muslim/African neighborhood. They are hard to miss and cover larger areas of the country, excluding the parts occupied by Poland, Russia and Lithuania.

You must seduce the woman. First step is to let her know right of that bat that you wanna fug and she gone like it, doesn't matter if she actually will or not. Use you eyes, use eye contact n don't break when talking, think intimidating eyes but instead of I'm "I'm gunna kick your ass" eyes use "I'm gunna fuck your ass" eyes. After that it's up to you want kind of user you wan to present yourself as

Be good looking or super confident and slightly good looking.
Have lots of money.
Otherwise lower your standards one by one until you can actually get sex.

Chloroform

Sex? What is this unknown substance?

I lowered my standard, but still no luck

it's like all girls are lesbians or have boyfriends

Trips of truth

Isn't actually as effective as they show in the movies.

I'd personally recommend a date rape drug like Rohyphenol.

>i liek marmite

become a trap obviously

First off, never be the guy she's talking to like that.

Learn how to be an asshole. I would blow money, time, and energy trying to compliment and bribe my way into some pants but one night when I went out I was just annoyed. Sat at a bar stool, two girls came up, and I was just the perfect amount of dickhead/honest/attentive.

I wasn't trying to be nice in the slightest, I was actually being pretty fucking brutal because I was annoyed that I wasn't getting laid. Then, fucking shocker (to me anyhow), one of them just up and tells me she lives a few blocks down.

I figured it was just a fluke, went back to being a really polite and gentle guy, but when that didn't work after a few days I went right back to being that asshole I was. I'm nothing special, hell I'm actually below average in my own estimation, but when I figured out how to duplicate that zero fucks given attitude I went from no girlfriend, maybe getting sex from a desperate girl to deciding which girl I wanted to text/call/snap whatever back with. I've told women to their face in front of their friends that I'm not interested and absolutely meant the shit, and you have no idea how much that enrages/interests/turns them on.

Just... Stop caring so fucking much.

Or they're just not attracted to you because you're socially awkward as fuck, or you're just a pussy.

Put my face in tinder. Lazily swipe a few times. Barely apply myself. Get laid few times a week.

find desperate fatties on /soc/ I guess

kek

after building some sort of rapport
three words : I Love you

THIS.

I've never been swimming in pussy, and I'm not a very bad looking guy. But the few times I've gotten any peace of ass, it's just because I didn't give a fuck and didn't treat them like some special snowflakes.

My wife preferably,
If not, one of my slam pigs.
There are 2

It hurts to say that this is in fact true OP, I hate being that user but your sexlife will be non existent if you're not. I want a partner but I also want sex. While I keep for the right girl I'll just keep on fucking

I ask if she wants to have sex.

Sometimes when I still do go to a bar or something I push it to see how far I can go and cross the line. This one chick had three guys fawning over her and I just sat there and took the piss out of her. She tried to give as good as she got but at some point she said if she'd ever fuck me she'd have to put a bag over her head. I popped back and told her I'd have to have three, one for her, one for me, and one for the fifth I'd have to shotgun to forget the fact I stuck my dick in her.

Five minutes later I sealed the deal and was just rolling my eyes at her while she talked shit on the way out of the door about the way she could fuck. I kept right on being a jackass and she loved every second of it.

>Befriend Thot
>Start Ignoring Thot
>Thot starts obsessively calling and leaving angery voice mail, and having her girlfriends annoy the shit out of you, for some form of response
>Get drunk at party
>Oh shit Thot is there

Kek the three bags thing wss cute user

Only beta fags can't get laid at a house party

that's how I got laid

Just talk to them like you would your guy friends. Even if it turns her off at first, you can pretty easily steer the conversation to discussing relationships, sex, the obscene... All of these things turn a woman on. I just had a conversation with a co-worker about her husband's penis size, and mentioned that I was a bit smaller that him. Then, SHE moved the topic to what her vagina looks like with pictures and all. The trick is to pretend you're exposing yourself until they expose themselves... Then you go in.


Being in the friend zone is only bad if you hang out by the front door where you worship the ground they walk on. Go deeper into the house and eventually you find her bedroom. This is done by caring, but not caring enough to listen to them prattle on. If the conversation is about something interesting, listen, contribute, whatever. If it's boring shit, but important to them, listen, but you don't have to act like you care.

One time I did piss off a girl so much she tried to get half the bar to kick my ass. Got a drink thrown in my face, whole nine yards, screaming, yelling, blah blah blah.

Shit thing is I can't remember what I said to piss her off. I do know it was funny enough where some girl next to her spewed her drink all over the place. I didn't get laid that night.

Every week or so my wife feels guilty that she hasn't put out. She just gets annoyed when I try to seduce her... so I leave it up to her. As long as I get it weekly, I'm pretty ok. She's pretty much admitted to being sexually dead inside.

youre only in the friend zone, if you keep talking and fawning over the chick that put you there. if a Thot friend cucks you, just find new thots to talk to.

Eventually Thot A gets jealous and you end up having sex, not very good sex mind you, but dull emotionless thot sex, and a drunk blowjob somewhere down the line.

Eh? We're talking women here user not middle school/hs girls. Women want to fuck

>How do you get sex, Sup Forums?

By having sex

>don't be ugly
>be confident

Thats literally it

How is this not common sense

Being nice isn't enough. There isn't any sexual attraction to niceness for women. You have to be at least one of the following, fun, funny, interesting or attractive.

Most of you fail at all 4 of those and that's why you're trapped in the Fedorazone.

While you are probably thinking to yourself,
>well, user. I think I'm hilarious
No, you're not. You're cringeworthy. Being funny is a sign of intelligence and wit. Unfortunately, your fedora is constricting your brain and limiting your capacity for thought.

t. Pu55y 5lay3r

P.s. IM NOT TELLING YOU TO BE A DICK THOUGH

Let 70% of communication be through body language. Don't try to explain your actions but be responsible about how you approach and watch his/her moves as a response to your actions, respond accordingly. Use your words intelligently and succinctly. More words = less/no sex cuz you will probably say something stupid. Also, with this method, you are pretty much guaranteed to fail the first time or two but you'll get the hang of it. Be confident, and most importantly, STAY IN YOUR LEAGUE. The best you will get is at most 2 points over you, like if you are 5/10, don't aim for 8/10 or 9/10's, you will get shrugged off... that's just the way it works....unless you have lots of money. I've even fucked with girls who have boyfriends with this method. As a 17 year old 6/10, I fucked a 7/10 23 year old at a music festival with that method. Molly helps a lot too. Bitches love good molly.

(cont. because of some shit I've seen in this thread)

Guys bitch about the friend zone. Some guys won't tell you this, I will. If you find a girl who's chill with you and friend zones you use her to your advantage. Women naturally talk to other women, and they can be a tool like no other to use to leverage into a situation.

Guys talk about having a wingman. My wing'man' is a girl named Ashley who's best friend I dated. She knows I'm out to get laid, we don't want to fuck each other because we both agreed it'd be weird, and because she's a social person she pulls people in. It helps that she's good looking too, because bitches get jealous, and a woman jealous for attention is twice as easy to pick up.

>Being nice
>working ever

The last girl I dated, literally got made fun of for 4 months straight

The ones bitching about friend zone do so bc they want to be with her, not fuck her friends user. I completely get what you're saying tho, no disagreement there

Anons who are serious about shedding off their former fedoras need to follow THIS post as gospel.

You first have to admit that whatever you're currently doing in your attempt to attract a respectable mate is wrong.

All wrong. There's no way getting around that. Stop it. You're fucking embarrassing.

Now that we understand that there is an issue with your approach, we need to work out what about your approach is exactly wrong. Often here are some key lifestyle problems that compel such cringe behavior.

You need to reform your dress, your hair, pop the zits, get to walking everyday, progress to jogging everyday, and stop watching MLP. Without changing any of those, women will continue to write you off before they even get you a chance. There is no incentive for a woman to attempt to develop a relationship with someone who is clearly a bust.

Investigate what other anons believe to be cringeworthy. Google cringe. Google fedora cringe. Identify similarities between these people and compartmentalize them and purge them from your own behavioral patterns. Eat healthy and loose the fat.

You will notice that women will begin to no longer ignore you. They'll listen until you start speaking. Then they'll realize that you're just a fedora in disguise

Dont talk about magic the gathering. Dont talk about MLP or anime (unless you're picking up a fat weeb bitch but I'm trying to get you a girl that is respectable for contemporary society). Don't talk about LARPing or your sword collection.

Be fun. Be funny. Be interesting.

Women arent interested in what you're interested in. Women like leadership, a strong hand, a sense of direction and if you look like you have your life in order.

They care about having children. Every single one of them, even if they say they dont like kids. They are built to want to have a family and be provided for. You must look like you're on a path to success. But you can only achieve any of this if you actually are on a path for success.

...

I'm this user

Under no circumstances be this guy. His look is actually making me more heterosexual.

is that a safety helmet ontop of a fedora?
is this the ultimate protection for your virginity?

genocide

we will fight a war with USA, americans will get their homer hacked in the future

Don't

If you're ANYTHING in >pic related

STOP

I used to ask my fwb. But she ended that.

the radiated firemen of america

future classic

Remember the last porn where the guy in the fedora actually got laid?

Yeah, me neither.

Wut

no, that's a safety helmet over a trilby

But does it protect your virginity tho?

use my 8/10 face and good chat, try and make 'em laugh
Literally all there is to it, if you ugly then im afraid you've no chance

Be someone/thing they can never have.

Tinder

Even ugly confident fucks can get pussy.

This is right and wrong in so many ways. user is trying to get sex, not establish a relationship. Being healthy and not a slob is a really big part of it, but everybody is different in terms of interests. My brother for example ended up establishing a strong relationship with his girlfriend, (not a fat weeb bitch, shes around 6/10 but still pretty beta) but all I ever really see or hear about them doing is playing WoW, some other vidyas and going on vacations together but they are both dorks soooo......

Plus, not all women want children. If you bring up wanting to have kids while you are trying to smash...just fill in the blank... especially if you are even slightly less attractive than they are. That limits you to only filter out ones that want long term committed relationships but there will still be lots of work to do to get the smash. It may work for the conservative beta female, but a good looking respectable alpha female will most likely continue to look around for "the one" attractive alpha male who has a large variety of interests, social skills, talents and resources to spend their life with.
This poster seems to be one or two stages above the fedora wielding beta. Do not take this advice as gospel, but as a token of perspective to how you should not act under a first impression. Not hating on you, but you could fix a few things up here.

THIS. Take it from an old timer, there are three truisms you need to always remember regarding women:

1. Like everyone else, they need to feel valued;
2. Like everyone else, they've had mixed and varied experiences with the opposite sex;
3. Like everyone else, they're more impressed with people who are not as impressed with them as everyone else.

In fact, a hot girl is often easier to hook up with than an ordinary girl.

Hot girls grow up having things given to them, getting showered with compliments, etc ... and you cause them to question their "world view" if you don't start drooling over them. They might try to explain it away with something like "he must be gay" or "he's like a brother to me" so you have to be forward and direct. Even better if you flirt with her less than hot friends. (Wait, he's not gay, he's in the market ... but he's ignoring me???) At which point, she subconsciously concludes that you're "stronger" than the other saps she meets and ... you're in.