I just saw the Emoji Movie so you don't have to

I just saw the Emoji Movie so you don't have to.

AMA

cont. from the last thread

Other urls found in this thread:

ijr.com/the-declaration/2017/07/927587-emoji-film-fights-trump-pushes-young-people-adopt-progressive-values-actor-says/
youtube.com/watch?v=yrpWqhh_Bgk
sonypicturesanimation.com/films.php?s=thestar
youtube.com/watch?v=rPsmXytKkdg
youtube.com/watch?v=M1lzJuwJD9k
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Didn't see the last thread? How was it? Honestly, without thinking about how cringe the idea is

What? There's a movie about emojis?
Why?

The movie had a budget of $50,000,000. This movie was such a waste of that amount of money that it would have been less of an offence if T.J Miller took a briefcase filled with $50,000,000 and burned it in front of starving Somalian children...I would rather watch footage of the planes hitting the fucking twin towers for an hour and a half because the planes and the buildings at least have some fucking structure!

Yes Granddad! Glad to see you came out from under your rock!
In all seriousness, Sony Pictures Animation made it to cash-grab on the Emoji craze for millenials.

There's no way it could have been THAT bad

Patrick Stewart plays a pile of shit

Can you sum the entire plot up in 5 sentences or less?

What is the least bad joke?

Well. I stand corrected.

What happened with the handsmaids emoji

i can't fucking believe that this is a goddamned movie. i would rather watch a teen titans go marathon with my eyeballs strapped open like in clockwork orange than see this filth of a picture. i feel sick even calling it a movie. holy fucking shit, someone please maim the idiots that made this piece of shit.

Is the corporate propaganda as prevalent as they say?

Sup Forums needs to create a Meme Movie.

teen titans go is my guilty pleasure, though its not as bad as you think

I fucking love teen titans go. I'm 24 and grew up with the original series

ah shit, I forgot to save the original
'terrorism intensifies' pic.

OH! I know!
Angry Birds movie!
How do they compare?

TL:DR Emojis are sentient beings inside a kid's phone. This new fuck named Gene is a "meh" emoji, and he fucking fucks up on his first day on the job, which prompts the dictator of the town, think Hillary Clinton's personality mixed with Shia LeBeouf's unbridled rage, to send robots to kill him and the Hi-5 emoji.

They escape and go to a Hacker-Finding App (Really) and find a girl named Jailbreak to try and meet Texting God and reprogram Gene. They go through pandering app after pandering app, including Candy Crush, Instagram and...Dropbox(???) until eventually realizing that "IS OKEY 2 B #URSELF XDDD"
They kill Hillary LeBeouf and learn to accept themselves blah blah blah

The credits

The hand? Hi-5? Spunky black character with a British accent. Think Wheatly but without the charm, clever dialogue, or humour.

Moreso than they say.

Emoji Movie has a 6% on RT. No contest. Angry Birds is better.

>teen titans go is my guilty pleasure, though its not as bad as you think

Worst goddamned thing on television since ... well worst goddamned thing on television.

The show makes me want to throw hammers through my television until they start to come out the back of it.

It makes me want to drive to the studio of the guys who created it and run over each and every one of their feet.

It forces me to hold my breath and count to infinity.

It makes me root for cancer.

Shitty, shitty show.
But not as shitty as this GODDAMN emoji movie. May it somehow kill children and be proven to have done so in a court of law.

>that "plot"
further proof that there was no reason for this thing to exist

old teen titans was good, teen titans go or whatever new shit it is, is complete and utter shit

I fucking love TTG. its lowkey genius

I've had fever dreams with a more coherent plot.

The pacing is all wrong too, the beginning feels like the rising action and they explain everything like the children are made of glass and weed clippings. Also, the aim of the robots that were chasing them makes Storm trooper aim look like Simo Hayha

Guy shows up in this movie to kill audience.
He finds he's To late

Well, atleast shitty movies like this aren't funded by government as in Russia

>the Emoji Movie

FUCK THIS MOVIE
FUCK IT
FUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKIIIITTTTTTTT

I saw the trailer and deleted my YouTube account out of shame.

The actors and cast claimed that this movie is a "Feminist movie" that sought to destroy Trump's administration.

ijr.com/the-declaration/2017/07/927587-emoji-film-fights-trump-pushes-young-people-adopt-progressive-values-actor-says/

>The actors and cast claimed that this movie is a "Feminist movie" that sought to destroy Trump's administration.

this movie is a "shitty movie" that sought to destroy the faith in humanity of moviegoers.

Sir Patrick Stewart you disrespectful fool!

Biodome.

...

That's Jailbreak, the "1337 HAX0R!!!1!!1!" written by people who have no idea how to hack or even how a computer works. She is the only Emoji with a body. Once you notice it it is really off-putting.

Reminder that the emoji movie is what they axed the brilliantly animated popeye film by Samurai Jack's creator Genndy Tartakovsky
youtube.com/watch?v=yrpWqhh_Bgk

for this literal shit
This is why the terrorists hate us

Yep, a lot of good writers were kicked out because the Emoji Movie was "going to be such a success". Serves Sony right, damn thing has a 6% on RT

What the fuck happened
How did we go from this to the emoji movie
What brand opiates were they absorbing rectally

Holy shit

A film so dishonorably bad seppuku was required

Last Thread I said the only acceptable form of seppuku was seppuku with a live trout

That still stands

As if this wasn't bad enough, they just announced another film. About Jesus. Right after the emoji movie.
Tip of the ice berg
It's a children's comedy, and the main character is a donkey. not jesus
I am not making this shit up, here
sonypicturesanimation.com/films.php?s=thestar

In Sony Pictures Animation's THE STAR, a small but brave donkey named Bo yearns for a life beyond his daily grind at the village mill. One day he finds the courage to break free, and finally goes on the adventure of his dreams. On his journey, he teams up with Ruth, a loveable sheep who has lost her flock and Dave, a dove with lofty aspirations. Along with three wisecracking camels and some eccentric stable animals, Bo and his new friends follow the Star and become accidental heroes in the greatest story ever told – the first Christmas.
U.S. RELEASE DATE: November 10, 2017

Saw a trailer for that before the movie.


We gon' need Jesus after the hell Sony unleashed.

Also I am NOT seeing that. Don't expect another AMA in November

I was so ticked the fuck off when Popeye got the boot, it meant a lot to Genndy. I honestly cannot believe that anybody thought the Emoji Movie was a good idea. Hope they go under for this shit.

Ill see it for you user

Im looking for more reasons to kill myself anyways

You are a true hero.

The movie is currently 20 mil in the hole. One of Sony's biggest flops ever.

youtube.com/watch?v=rPsmXytKkdg

I'm beginning to think it wasn't jews or romans that killed jesus, it was this terrible film thats about to be released.
It's so bad that jesus feels it retroactively in the future and decides to let them crucify him. This explains why God would allow humans to kill him when he knew their plan.
He no longer wants to live

Also, Tom and Jerry: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory
Can we stop for a moment and have a serious talk about what the buggerring flaming tit pickles is actually going on in people's heads in hollywood? Look at the state of american animation, every time something promising like Samurai Jack or Gravity Falls or the usual Pixar film comes out (that can be taken seriously and appeal to kids and adults), dreamworks comes out with Shrek 7 and it's like Sisyphus, rolling the boulder up the same damn hill, forever

. His girlfriend seems to want children "otherwise, she'll get bored". A few days ago, the whole children conversation came out. The 3 of us were with this other girl, who's nearing forty, and who's been breaking up for the past 3 years with a guy she dated for 5 years. I used to try and be supportive of her, but got tired of her swearing she would dump him, only to sleep with him literally hours later. The guy likes hard drugs, sleeps with anyone, lies too much and overall, just doesn't seem like someone right in the mind. Anyways, somehow we got talking about babyez and this junkie bf chick says, "well, then don't marry your boyfriend if you're not having kids. What's the point?" I'm not even going to go into my answer which was then refuted with a "so you just want someone to entertain you then" and continued with "maybe he's not the right man, because he doesn't inspire you to have babies". Nevermind the fact that I decided long before I met him that I wanted nothing to do with kids and that he wanted a vasectomy... While he was single. This girl has had who knows how many pregnancy "scares". She's sleeping without protection with a guy who fucks around, and deep inside, I think she wishes to get pregnant of him. That's awesome!/s But when two conscious grown ups like me and my boyfriend decide we don't want kids, all the above mentioned comments happen. However, shit really hit the fan when they asked me if I'd still be friends with my friend if he got a baby. I simply and unemotionally replied with a "maybe". Because I'm a selfish, judgemental person, who infers his life will change in any way because of a kid. KIDS DON'T CHANGE YOUR LIFE, I was told. So according to them, I'm not a good friend because of how i dont want kids
Thoughts?

Okay, so Sony realized they fucked up with Spiderman, gave it over to Marvel Studios. Good move.
They're footing the bill for FFxiv, which is also good.
And then there's this shit.

Our only hope is that whoever is greenlighting these monsterpieces from sony animation, end up getting shitcanned so hard, they have to go back to Israel

Is there a even character that’s close to being as perfect as Cell? Let alone be him. And I'm not talking about Perfect Cell. I'm not talking about Super Perfect either. Hell, I'm not even talking about SSGSS Golden Cell. I’m also not talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with 9001 SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs & obtained Beerus & Whis' DNA. I'm definitely NOT Talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with 9001 SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs & obtained Beerus, Whis, Champa & Vados' DNA after absorbing enough Spiral Power & Getter Rays to use SSGSS Golden Tengen Toppa Getter Emperor. I'm talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with an infinite number of SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs, wished himself immortal with the Super Dragon Balls & obtained Beerus, Whis, Champa, Vados, Zeno, Madara Uchiha & Ultimate Kars' DNA to obtain Requiem versions of every Stand (including but not limited to Gold Experience Requiem, Made in Heaven Requiem, The World Over Heaven Requiem & D4C Requiem) after absorbing enough Spiral Power & Getter Rays to use SSGSS Golden Tengen Toppa Getter Emperor as he pilots Elder Demonbane with Cosmic Armor, Power Cosmic, and Omega effect, the Anti-Life Equation also flowing through his veins, while he does 101 Push-ups, 101 Sit-ups, 101 Squats, 11 km run per day for over 4 months inside the sun after ingesting Kryptonian DNA (to somehow obtain infinite power from a finite source) after consuming Popeye's Spinach while riding the writer's cock to battle.

Whoa no need for making it racial
Im a muslim, I know I dont like getting ripped apart on here

I have to argue that Pixar is slowly loosing it. The actual TALENT is moving over to Disney animation studios, and Pixar is apparently where the old fogeys are left at.

>I'm talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with an infinite number of SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs, wished himself immortal with the Super Dragon Balls & obtained Beerus, Whis, Champa, Vados, Zeno, Madara Uchiha & Ultimate Kars' DNA to obtain Requiem versions of every Stand (including but not limited to Gold Experience Requiem, Made in Heaven Requiem, The World Over Heaven Requiem & D4C Requiem) after absorbing enough Spiral Power & Getter Rays to use SSGSS Golden Tengen Toppa Getter Emperor as he pilots Elder Demonbane with Cosmic Armor, Power Cosmic, and Omega effect, the Anti-Life Equation also flowing through his veins, while he does 101 Push-ups, 101 Sit-ups, 101 Squats, 11 km run per day for over 4 months inside the sun after ingesting Kryptonian DNA (to somehow obtain infinite power from a finite source) after consuming Popeye's Spinach while riding the writer's cock to battle.
What the fuck is this legendary comment??!
Is... I-Is this the most OP character in fiction?

topkek

I cant stand emojis as it is... White trash city girls and niggers love to put a emoji after every fucking word they type, not to mention they include them in their already cringy relationship memes... and now this? a fucking movie that used up millions of dollars?

>bout Jesus. Right after the emoji movie.
>Tip of the ice berg
>It's a children's comedy, and the main character is a donkey. not jesus


fuck it.
I quit.
I hadn't planned to suicide for a few more years, but, well, this seems as good of a time as any.

Now is the time to rejoice. The movie is doing abysmally, not just with critical response, but money, which is what they care about.

If the film really doesn't do well, even with children, then maybe these scumbags will learn to listen to their audience every once in a while, instead of deciding on their own with 0 input what is or isn't cool and popular or entertaining.

A film this bad isn't awful, this is the perfect scapegoat for sending a message where they should listen to people. And they've been hurt with their wallets for once, making a childish movie for the lowest common denominator simply won't cut it this time.
For their sake, they had better start listening.

Wait for TJ Miller and Sony to blame it on trolls

Screenshot this comment and keep it for when it actually happens

I am having a fucking time and a half listening to your fury pour out here user. I appreciate it.

I enjoy ranting, if I'm given an outlet I'm more than happy to rant for a while on a given topic. I already shelled out 10 bucks watching the Emoji Movie so I've already hit Rock Bottom's basement

Then it was worth it.
It was ALL worth it.

Still woulda rather seen a Popeye movie though.

I would have as well. Writers from PPG, Samurai jack, Dexter's Lab. Jesus Christ Sony what the fuck kind of brain parasite do you have

I hate this fucking movie and everything and everyone involved with it. I wish plague, pestilence and famine on Sony studios. Fuck 'em all.

Aren't Plague and Pestilence the same thing?

Reminds me of the devil may cry reboot making a quarter of any of the other games after the fans spent three years saying they didn't like it, and after three years of being insulted by Ninja Theory. Then Capcom turns around and says "devil may cry fans destroy brand out of spite"
Like, fuck you, not being interested in a product is destroying a brand out of spite? I didn't know it was my job to pay your salary unconditionally and regardless of what you put out, Capcom. What an immature way to act, blaming fans who supported the franchise for years, over such nonsense.

Just remember this when the time comes for the media or Sony or whoever to blame "fans" for being childish and "destroying a fresh new IP out of spite"

no.
one gets people sick and the other throws insects around like a goddamned shitstorm.

Ah, ok. Thanks for the clarification

You might be right, Nostradamanon

When this thread gets deleted, I'll post another one in the morning tomorrow, just letting all of you know

Nostradamus reference? I don't see the link, explain please for I am uncultured

Why put yourself through all this pain?
Is this the next coming of jesus?
Why did you do all of this for us?

Nostradamus was a Frenchman who is known for predicting things and having them come true hundreds of years later. Nostradamus + user = Nostradamanon

I really hope this signals the death of Sony Pictures

I did it to prevent others from having to do the same. I spent my $10 so that others could collectively save $200

Ah thank you for that, always fun to learn new things
I'm not sure if you are aware from reading this thread, but it's funny you should mention jesus second coming....

I literally had to do a search for this, Because I was sure it was a fucking Jape. FUCKING SHIT!!! What's next?! Fucking Smash Mouth Playing as Jesus is born!?

Wat do you think we need to use to burn all of the film reels, napalm or thermite?

I saw a preview of that movie in the theatre. It actually didn't look too bad, though maybe it was the shock of paying money to go see the Emoji Movie.

Nuclear Fission

the dude in that picture is eyeing the donkey and it worries me

I saw a review for that Piece of Feculence staring Cat and Rodent. Lazy fucking animation, scene for scene ripoff in some sections, and Cat and Rodent don't seam to have any real purpose AT ALL!! Gene Wilder is spinning like a top in his grave

Honestly, I hope they don't just die off, but they learn from the experience and put people back in charge who give a fuck what they put out for people to see
Like this guy
youtube.com/watch?v=M1lzJuwJD9k
Just listen to they way he talks about the animation
Then again the fact that they fired him and his crew and axed the project after seeing that may be a good indication that they are beyond saving and need to burn to the fucking ground. Maybe if Sony dies from this (which they are too big, they will bounce back) it would be like a huge reminder not to be a fucking careless idiot with your audience reactions

It amazes me that Samurai Jack season 5 had budget cuts but studios throw money at tom and jerry, teen titans go, the powerpuff reboot, and so much just.......
Fuck man
I dont even know where to continue the example.
I'm just really glad that shitty sequels or remakes do't hurt beloved IP's from the past if we just ignore. Tom and Jerry is still as enjoyable as always in it's series run

They didn't learn from Ghostbusters. And they wont learn from this. They will continue to shove out steaming piles of horse shit, and when we, the audience complain about how awful it smells, we will be attacked on Social Media as {Insert Derogatory Term Here}

Would you suck a log of The Emoji Movie out of Andy Sixx's ass?

...

kill yourself

That's actually a good idea, can we turn this into a thread for appreciating good well made animation? Thread is still young.
This show was, and still is, The Shit
Go watch Megas XLR if you haven't

Shut up ya Gypsy

Perhaps

I would protest but Trips is always king.

Wait, don't do it or whatever.

That's not how trips work fag

Protest what, talking about stuff we appreciate, or protest Megas XLR
Because if it's the second one, you and I may have a problem

Best thing is how that bitch rants about how every girl doesnt want to be a disney princess and at the end she saves them by becoming a disney princess

Yep. Double Standards.

Is Popeye the new Godzilla? is he going to destroy the Japanese?

No.
He's going to fuck Bluto up. Royally.
I was honestly excited to see American promotion for animation take itself seriously, rather than the goofy faces they always give characters on boring posters.

Compare the US posters for Frozen to their French posters and you'll see what I mean.

hahahaha oh my god they are marketing furries to kids using the actual christ himself fucking lololololol

I saw it as a joke with friends and we went all out with t-shirts and such, but holy shit its one of the worst movies I've seen.

So co sidering that we are talking about how Sony Pictures has been pulling bad moves on films, what are you guys' thoughts on the new Venom movie they plan on creating? Will it hop or will it flop?

So this is EmojiHate thread #2. Lets see how far we can take this.
Someone should make an image that we toss memes onto and add another one for each new thread.
Sorta like the Liru threads of yore.

Faggit

That's why I did it too, as a joke, but it wasn't even fun to make fun of. It's like poking fun at that one kid in class until you find out he eats his own shit and shouts "Damn Daniel" in the school assembly.

>mfw it will completely deface jesus and show the logical ways he performed all his miracles
>mfw it plays him out as a spoiled brat in the same style as that goat animation where mary magdeline was the pink goat chick with big tits
>mfw the christian empire of the 90's is either finally dead, or finally being revived