Would you fuck Amy Schumer?

Would you fuck Amy Schumer?

I'm not gay, so no

Tbh, yeah...

I'd hit it...at 200 yards with a quick double tap

Not a chance.

No

She makes me want to fuck dudes too...

Yeah. She has been getting in shape I think. Fuck and dump.

It's weird, Amy Schumer looks good at first, but the more you look she just gets uglier and uglier.

Would you fuck Amy Schumer or Bailey Jay?

>In shape

id fuck her ruthlessly. id squeeze her fat whilst fucking her ass.

what brake is that
got an Arsenal SAM7 that I've had for years. completely stock but lately I've been wanting buy a muzzle brake of some sort.

both

Yea why not. She'd put out

yes

I dont want to be assimilated into her so no

You're gay for one of those. Which, I don't know.

Your mom puts out

Yep. Sure would. Would also fuck a pile of garbage so take that as you will.

I would, I saw some porno w some chick that reminded me of her and I find her oddly sexually attractive now. No where near top like 30 celebs or whatever though

traps are gay?

Without an inch of makeup, I wouldn't give her an angry inch of dick.
Ugly pig

...

She is a fat Ronda Rousey, think about it.

It's not a matter of "would I", it's more like "when I".

>seriously, just a matter of time now

Well, she wont stop you but you'd be fucking a pile of ash you sick fuck.

In a heart beat. She's pretty cute, rich, and funny.

I would fuck fatter chicks than her, but just knowing who my dick is inside would be too much to bear. Also, knowing I might be in one of her cringey routines.

Yeah sure why the hell not, but then again I pick up fat girls at the bar because I'm a sucker for tits

Sup Forums would fuck your sister
Sup Forums would fuck your mom
Sup Forums would fuck your cousin
Sup Forums would fuck you
Sup Forums would fuck your daughter
Sup Forums would fuck your grandpa using lemons as a condom
Sup Forums would fuck your aunt Jessie with the squint
Sup Forums would dig up the corpse of your dead uncle and fuck that
Sup Forums would fuck your ex-girlfriend
Sup Forums would fuck your current girlfriend
Sup Forums would fuck that chubby redhead at 7-11 with the glass eye and clubbed foot
Sup Forums would fuck you up the ass with a strap-on the size of your ego
Sup Forums wants to know why the fuck you keep asking it if it would fuck something when you already know the fucking answer
Sup Forums would fuck your dog
Sup Forums would fuck a donkey
Sup Forums would fuck a squirrel
Sup Forums would fuck the hole in a tree trunk
Sup Forums would fuck a horse, a midget, a goat, twin lesbian sisters, and Joan Rivers without her makeup on a liferaft while playing Moon River on a badly tuned ukulele
Sup Forums would fuck an electric eel on its period
Sup Forums would fuck a dead kitten
Sup Forums would fuck a lactating shark
Sup Forums would fuck the stingray that killed Steve Irwin
Sup Forums would fuck the hole in Steve Irwin's chest made by that stingray
Sup Forums would fuck an octopus til it inked
Sup Forums would fuck mud if it thought it would wiggle
Sup Forums would fuck a grapefruit peel left on a Las Vegas sidewalk for 3 weeks
Sup Forums would fuck anything it can see, think, or imagine
Sup Forums is tired of hearing you wonder if its standards have somehow magically improved in the last five minutes, five hours, five days, five weeks, or five years
Sup Forums s most of all tired of you using an excuse to dump pictures of some chick that you like in order to get communal approval of your horndogginess
YES Sup Forums WOULD FUCK HER
She is substantially less objectionable to half the shit Sup Forums would fuck given the chance.
Are you happy now, OP?
YES Sup Forums WOULD FUCK HER
Sup Forums would fuck a drunk camel if it pushed back
STOP ASKING. DUMP NUDES. SHUT THE FUCK UP.

>Rhonda Roundy

The shape of a tube sock full of butter.

Would she fuck you? She likes cut jew cock

I wouls fuck all of those things before Amy Schumer.

The shape of a tube sock full of butter

Sure, why not. She's told us so much about her vagina, I feel like I know it already.

I'd rather fuck a tube sock of butter.
In fact....I'll be right back.

That's immaterial. I'll never be in that situation.

The non-make up on the left is a look-a-like. The chin and nose if off, same with the eyes

I wouldn't even touch her with your dick, user.

>take condom
>fill with nightcrawlers
>put on

It's the arsenal AK74 style brake for the 7.62x39 caliber. Pretty effective but pretty heavy too. I run a Fighter 24 Muzzle Brake on my AK now. Just as effective and very lightweight.

Who said a slam pig had to be hot?

Sure.

How much is she paying?

Having to listen to her bullfuckery is definetely extra.

yes duh, i am a white male. I fuck all disadvantaged humans. idiot....

Checked

So which one of you are going to fuck me?

...

...

ew dude no

Nope.

6 years ago when she was funnier. At least I could have had a laugh and a shag at once.

I'd rather fuck a dead pig, fuck no.

I see Amy Schumer as a challenge, more than anything. Here is a woman who, in every single aspect, is absolutely revolting - her exterior AND her personality - yet I can't help but wonder what would be like, to plunge balls-deep into her repeatedly.

That's right. Balls-deep. With no protection.

I won't lie, I'm extraordinarily-hard while typing this. I want to grab this... thing... and that's what Amy Schumer is, let's not delude ourselves, a "thing"... by the hips and ram mercilessly in and out of her quivering, malformed cunt with the force of a gladiatorial chariot, while she makes stupid faces and contorts orgasmically, unable to control her bodily reactions even if she wanted to.

I would erupt violently inside that corrupt and corrupting womb as though the entire fate of humanity depended on my seed penetrating the foul walls of one of her ovaries, the electrical fusion from this coupling creating the Antichrist, as our combined, guttural, Chewbacca-like roars shattered glass and walls alike around us, the house toppling down while we lay there in a filthy, disgusting mess.

Yeah. I reckon Amy Schumer does it for me.

For rap sheet purposes only, yes.

>Her natural beauty really shows wearing a trashbag tbh

Of course I would fuck her. But then again, I'm not some beta neckbeard who somehow believes he should only be shagging supermodels.

what state do you live in where you can have these? also, is that an actual ak or a chinese thing?

>we are Amy Schumer
>We are one

Seems like you left something out, hmmm......

Sup Forumstards would fuck literally any woman if they rated their dick a 6 or higher

she probably sucks great cock, so yeah.

I'm straight so...no. ask a goat herder. I herd they're into beastiality.

You know, as much as people might talk about body and weight, it's not that bad. Average really. Her face is just not attractive though. Maybe as a slimmer woman it might work better with her genetics/structure, but as is, it's no asset.

100% in agreement

>cute
>funny
Please stop lying. Its a sin

Hell yes! Over and over!

Is it weird that I prefer her without makeup?

does she do anal? she will

Every single one of you that said no are lying. You would do it thinking she would give you some of that Comedy Central money

It's not even the weight, I've fucked a few chubster's in my drunken college days, but look at that face, I don't think I could do it, get that sad depressed feeling int he middle of it like, damn, look at what I've been reduced to

Not even if I had an extra, disposable penis I never had to face & make eye contact with again.

i wouldn't fuck her with your dick let alone mine

Lies lies lies

Sure. I'd fuck every ounce of bacon off of her fat ass.

Of course, I have no standards. So I have that going for me...

for how much?

Fuck her money. I would do it just so I can sink my cock balls deep in her ass.

That's a big 10-4. She seems like she'd be a blast to date, too.

That's a lot of ass! You can do it man

If I'm getting properly compensated, sure.
If it was for free, I'm taking pics-fame is still fame, even if it's for slamming that increasingly unfunny hambeast.

She was actually cute back then too. Just a little chubby, but cute.

Now she just has a dumpy aunt body going on. Nope.

If she still looked like this, yes.

yes, but then again I'm desperate.

...

Lies. Both you niggers would. She's a first round draft pick for "your kind"

Sperm doesn't go into the ovary.
Do you know how sex works?

Have a Snickers bro.

Details details. You get the point neckbeard

fucking lost

...

I only fuck humans not whales

I would let her ride me while Lena Dunham sat on my face. As a bust inside her, I'd shout, "I voted Trump."

Yes but I'm also like 4 months dry and the last sex I had was so drunk I don't think I'm clear for reentry. So yes I would - but I wouldn't brag about it.

Yes, I would date her too, she's pretty cute.

She does have a nice tit

Translation: "This virginity train stops for nobody!"

...

Despite the "Amy Schumer is an ugly whale" meme, I've fucked fatter and uglier bitches.

So yeah, I wouldn't pull out.

Awww... She brought her own dildo. How cute.