Fuck man every time I make progress on killing myself I either get halted or pushed back. This shit is getting annoying and it's getting harder and harder to keep going. I'm trying to pay off all my bills before I kill myself so I don't fuck up my family before I go. But random shit keeps coming up and it sets me back more than it should.
I just want to die, but no matter what I am restricted by BS.
...
Maybe the universe is trying to tell you something.
Why would your family have to pay your bills? As far as I know that only happens if someone inherits your estate. If you're just some broke NEET loser then nobody is affected.
OP could have dependents, ya know.
maybe you should just do it
Maybe the world doesn't want you to die. So it keeps making annoying things happening so you can stay here longer.
this is good
So, cry me a river. What's so fucked up in your life that you wanna leave it?
Wait so they don't have to pay my debt? I'm not a broke NEET, I'm in the military. I specifically joined to pay off all my debt, at my previous jobs the income I received didn't match my creditors insane interest rate so it wasn't working. Once I joined I got more income a bonus and all my creditors were forced to lower their interest rate to below 6%.
If you're telling me I don't have to pay these scamming fucks back then I'll get my shit setup to go asap.
Nothing important. I don't belong here and I don't want to be alive. I don't like living, at all.
It's not just good, it's true.
I know most of the faggots here HATE country music, but look for a country song called "Live like you were dying"
I'll never understand suicide.
It's the dumbest thing ever.
The oft so posted rebuttal to the suicidal typology. Maybe the world had been your oyster beforehand? Maybe through so much emotional and physical neglect, you carried on as though the way you were treated was the way the world operated, you couldn't care less about laws and emotional constraints; or of apathy and empathy. You've just grown bored and exhausted of this plane and realm of existence. After all, the greatest curiosity ever pondered "where are we going?" The multi-facted question of existential crisis. Where do we as a species go, where do we as a glimmer on the cosmic recognition view end up? If by only a strand I stand to witness my natural death, through every victory and defeat alike, I'll ask "where are we going" with no just or fulfilling answer found. I don't need some quote from Sup Forums to dissuade me from a universal and historical question, to know what no one could possibly know. I'll never have to report the answer to anyone, but I alone will know.
I would go on to say though, that even through this intrinsic nihilistic feeling, teeming at the back of my brain, this life could be our only, so why waste it. Why not strive for a greatness that's only personally fulfilling. No need to appease the society I couldn't care less about, only the satisfaction in myself. This could be your only chance to experience consciousness. Would you really throw it away because it was too rough, or unlikely chance to success in some social context?
Not important, but worth dying over. Sorry bro, gonna hafta call bullshit on that one.
22 a day is too many, and you can't muster out without orders. So speak up, whats the real deal?
Drink Old Crow, dude
I know what you are going through man. I want to kiltmyself practically everyday. Unfortunately (I say it like it's a bad thing. I guess it's good) I have a fiancé that loves me a lot. If it wasn't for her I would of swallowed a bullet in my head by now.
Is it? Does it make you feel all warm and fuzzy? It's a magicians trick to distract you from the root of your issue. It's too much of a feel goodism to hold any merit. What do you gain when the world becomes your oyster? You're still bound by the same guards that were there before you read it, it just inspires this false confidence that NOW, anything is possible, when you're just the same as you were.
Your pain doesn't go away when you kill yourself, it just gets passed onto another human, user.
Bullshit. If you truly wanted to be dead, you'd be dead. People hell-bent on self destruction are seldom deterred.
What you want it is attention...for people to take pity on you, feel sorry for you, offer encouragement. It's what most people who carry on about killing themselves want, really. You're no different.
But, "I can't kill myself because life keeps intruding." Come the fuck on...
Wrong, YOUR pain does go away, your survivors will likely care, but you won't, not even about their misfortune. The dead are indifferent to the plight of relatives and society in general.
I mean I guess fact check me on this first to be safe, but the way I understand it is like if your mom dies and you're her heir and you're getting her house and whatever else, then you're inheriting her estate. That includes whatever debts she owes. That's just part of the package. But if you don't have anything that anyone cares about, your debts just go unpaid, same as if you stayed alive and just never paid on them. They can't just force somebody to pay something that they never had anything to do with, just because you were their kid. Not without them being party to a contract, like in the above example of you inheriting your mom's house.
It's not worth it, man
Theres a lot of projection in here. For most people this may work, but not everyone.
I told you already, I've been like this as far as I can remember. I don't enjoy life and I don't like living. Ive put on a fake face for the past decades so that no one would know and stop me. It's literally all I think about and plan for. I even considered getting a lobotomy in the idea that it might kill my mental state (essentially killing me) and give everyone around me someone different in the same body without having to physically kill myself altogether.
I'm not advocating it, it's not supposed to be smart or cool. Most people that do commit suicide truly have solvable problems.
So unless they want to keep any of my stuff it just goes to a debt collection agency? I'll think about it and do some research. I'm not sure what they'll take in order to balance my debts.
If what above user says is true and my family won't have to worry about a dime then I'm gone and you can 'lol' your heart out.
I know I'm going to kill myself, I'm not going to marry some chick and make her a widow.
That depends on the jurisdiction OP calls home. Any children or spouse that OP has will automatically be considered his heirs in most states. Without a will then who gets what is decided by a court. OP may not have much, but whatever he has could get a lien placed on it by any creditors, or taken outright.
There is also the matter of final expenses to be considered. Dying is expensive. Funerals average about three grand in my area. And suicide generally cancels any life insurance policies, or death benefits from the government.
Yeah if he has a spouse or kids I don't know. I was assuming that he didn't. As for funerals, though, that shit is optional. And retarded. If my family wastes good money on a funeral for me, that's on them for buying into the meme, not my fault
>suicide generally cancels any life insurance policies, or death benefits from the government.
Makes sense, otherwise more soldiers would just join and commit suicide instead of serving their time. I figured I'll just do whatever time I have to in order to pay for all that before I go.
Keeping it to yourself is what makes it worse. If you are military there are numerous resources for help. Mental health is no different than physical health. If you had a broken leg, would you try to hide it and carry on like nothing was wrong?
Go seek medical attention. Do it now.
No kids or dependents
Yo Op
If you're serious then humor me and call this number first.
800
273
8255
Again, this is dependent on where you die. You may opt to not have a funeral, but what happens to your remains is often strictly controlled by law. Some states require the body be embalmed and buried in licensed facilities, unless cremated, which is also not cheap. It's not like they can just throw you in a cornfield somewhere...
No thanks it won't change or fix a thing, only make it worse. Far FAR worse. It would set me back at least a decade for what I've already worked up to and permanently inhibit future progress. This is nothing like a broken leg or anything similar.
I understand your concern, but there is no turning back what I've already set in motion for years. No person is going to change this period.
No thanks, it's a suicide prevention hotline wish tracs your number and records your call. I wouldn't even risk using a burner. How stupid do you think I'd be to ruin my life's plan?
>It's not like they can just throw you in a cornfield somewhere...
I really don't get why not. A dumpster would be fine. I mean I guess there's the disease concern? Just burn them.
Those hotlines aren't for people who want to die. They're for people who want to live.
Well, it's someone to talk to. Because you kinda need that right now, bro.
Then at least consider another option. Go out a Hero. Like that old joke about a muslim who calls a suicide hotline and says he wants to die. The operator at the hot line says "Awesome, can you fly a plane?"
Volunteer for THE most dangerous assignment you can get, and keep doing it until your number is up. That way, when you die, people will remember you not as some depressed, suicidal faggot, but as a fearless badass who died in a blaze of glory.
Should also mention that this prevents insurance policies or government death benefits from being denied and may actually increase them. Plus, if memory serves, mikitary who die honorably in the kine of duty can be huried at the militaries expense and your debts forgiven.
Which is why I won't leave her a widow by killing myself. If I lost her there would no hesitation. I would kill myself & set my body to be auto cremated to leave behind no evidence of my existence.
No offense, but I laughed a bit.
I don't want to live. I don't like living.
The only thing I need right now is to look up my state laws so I can find the details of what user was talking about. Once I get a solid answer its either I kill myself that week or I stay alive long enough to pay off my shit and die.
That's not how the military works and again I have no interest in living. The stuff that may inspire you doesn't matter to me.
I'm fine with that, I want going to die by regular means anyway so the insurance is just wasted money to begin with.
>leave behind no evidence of my existence
I used to think about doing this, but it's no longer viable at this stage. I would have had to do it years ago before I entered the military.
>I just want to die, but no matter what I am restricted by BS.
if you really wanted to die you wouldn't care what people might think about you after you're dead. why should you care?
admit it, you just want attention.
I can say that if I wanted attention I would be talking to someone irl not through a thread.
The attention that I want is so that I don't any repercussions irl. I don't like to be given attention irl.
Yep I want attention from every random user on Sup Forums, damn you got me. Now that it's off my chest I guess I no longer want to die. Man that felt great.
Anyway, bye.