Hey Sup Forums, smoking weed for the first time on Thursday, what should I expect?

Hey Sup Forums, smoking weed for the first time on Thursday, what should I expect?

you're gonna overdose and die try not to worry too much because death is a natural part of human existence.

I hope you like kissing boys because its all you're going to want to be doing after you take that first hit

Depends on the type of marijuana, some have different effects than others, which are you trying?

the police

your asshole will enlarge to this size

Make sure you have a movie with stupid humor going (my first time my buddy and I sat down with a whole bag of pizza rolls and watched the Spongebob movie)

Don't believe the lies. You're probably gonna get extremely paranoid and sweat and get dry mouth and generally freak out

Expect itchy eyes, expect shit to look and feel like it did when you were a little kid, expect time to "stretch"

...or a horror movie

Getting high.

Dude, its like this.. ever watch the rekt threads around here, and somebody got punched hard in the face, and they're lying on their ass with their fists up, but the dude who hit him has already walked away?

Thats kinda what being stoned is like. But no pain, of course. Just the Huh? What just happened here? thing.

Literally don't expect anything. If you aren't sure if you got high or Not, you didn't, try again.
Inhale, don't just suck into your mouth. Don't be a pussy, But don't take huge rips either until you're used to smoking it
Also, anything you like anyway will be better.
Literally all you need to know to start
If you plan on making it a habit learn to tell quality of weed (usually done by smell, look, And most accurately smoking it) and learn how much money for how much weed, maybe buy a scale so as not to be that asshole eyeballing a bag wrong and calling some big black dude out on it.

real shit, listen to me

you won't get high unless you smoke as much as you can

otherwise you won't get high the first time

everyone has a weed cherry

You're going to maybe be giggly. Your head might be foggy. Your body might be tingly. You might start doing things and forget what you were doing while you're doing it. You might start writing or drawing something and not stop for an hour. You might think of the funniest joke or the best business idea you've ever come up with and forget it by morning.
You're going to get high. Enjoy it and understand that however you experience it is just the way marijuana affects you. Some people don't like it. Some people smoke all day. Just do as much as you want to.

Watch a dumb ass movie, have some snacks, jerk off, and stop being such a damn pussy. You'll either be paranoid or giggly the whole time. I smoke to calm my anxiety, weeds great for stress cause it's hard to give a damn about real problems when you're baked.

Take smallish puffs and inhale them deeply, expect it to make you want to cough a bit and you'll be ready for it.

> allll dayyyyyy erryyyyy day
>hi I'm 12 and what is this

disappointment.

This is bad advice, but I salute your effort.

You will cough so much you won't get all that high but it will seem super high because you never got high before. You will cough up most of the smoke before it gets into your blood. Once you get good at holding it in the future, you will be able to smoke yourself retarded.

Bring a baggie of mentholated halls. You're gonna cough a lot. Also if you're smoking or drinking you're gonna do that a shitload more without realising it.
Drink water and make sure you afford yourself an oppurtunity to sit down and crank one out while you're high. Shits cash bro.

The smoke doesn't go into your blood at all unless you inject it directly into a vein.

fpbp

t. someone reads about weed but has never actually smoked.

So, breathing doesn't bring oxygen into the lungs where blood gets oxygen? Wow, I never knew we needed to inject oxygen. How am I alive?

most of what i smoke makes me go through 3 phases.
1. everything is funny asf
2. i eat a lot
3. then i get tired.

If legit first time, you have ZERO tolerance.

You only need one toke and you will get high. Don't smoke a bunch, you will get too high and not enjoy it one bit. It takes 5-10 minutes to kick in after smoking, this is why so many over do it.

have a drink
cotton mouth's a bitch

You'll shoot your eye out

Have something to drink
Have something to snack
Have someone to smoke with
Have something funny to watch
Dont be on your phone
Have a good time

pot has always felt the same to you?
one night I smoked cheap weed that almost made me pass out, later that same night I was smoking out of my own weed and felt fine

I was already high af on my own strain when I tried that cheap weed but still very lucid, one puff and I started greening out

smoking different strains in one night gives you a different high

drugs are wack OP!

^Is all good advice, also keep in mind that each way of getting high works differently.