I need advice but I dont like /adv/ so I'm posting here

I need advice but I dont like /adv/ so I'm posting here

Me and my hubby have been married for 7 years now, with 2 kids. Both divorced before and he has major issues because of his first marriage, so we had a very tumultous first year. He found some random msg from an ex and freaked out. After a lot of amotional upheaval and much name calling from him (pretty much everything that he could imagine), we went for counselling and he realised his past baggage still weighs heavily on him. I stood by him because I know he's a good guy underneath and we worked it out and built a good bond Fast forward to 4 years into the marriage, he still has issues but he can control them (or thats what I thought). He starts talking to me about all his sexual fantasies including cuckolding/swinging. I'm a pretty non judgmental person and i listen to everything he says without judging, so he really went in depth about everything on his mind. I told him at the beginning that im not comfortable with seeing him with someone else. he insisted that seeing me with other guys will give him much more pleasure than him being with other women. Slowly fantasy talk changed into him insisting that we indulge in things. I love pleasing him and we have great sex life and I am the more adventurous person, so even though these are not my fantasies, I said i wont promise but we'll see how it goes.

He took me to a erotic massage on vacation where a naked woman massaged him and a naked guy massaged me. the guy also fingered me and I had an orgasm, my hubby just got a massage but he was glued into me and he kept talking about it for months to come.

Recently, we went on vacation and I had short layover to meet a friend, He kept talking and msging me the whole month before saying I should flirt with guys, make out or even go all the way, he would love it. Me and my friend went out, and I forgot my phone at home, so called hubby from dinner and told him that i left my phone at home and we are going out dancing.

There was a guy who was very into me and we danced the whole night. My friend got very drunk and suddenly left without us noticing. I was left alone with this guy and I though- Lets be adventurous, this is what hubby wants and it will turn him on like crazy. So he invited me home, I went and we ended up having sex. I came back to my friends place and immediately started msging hubby with all the details. He seemed excited and also surprised, because I had never specifically told him I was ready for it. I assumed he will understand I am willing to try from my more positive responses over the years.
Once I got home the next day, he completely lost it. Said I ruined the marriage and i was a whore. Said i didnt care about him or the kids and im an animal on heat. Also, that I just got horny and fucked this guy and I'm using his words as a justification.
Then he wanted to have sex with me on the same night and tell him all about how i fucked the other guy. Over the last month, we have been in this routine of him completely unravelling and calling me names, he also said he is divorcing me. Then he wants to have sex and all he talks about is the other guy with me.
Last week he said he is going to fuck other women and Ihave no right to object since I slept with someone. Now this is something I have been categorical since day 1, that I dont like this. He got onto tinder and started sending me pics, asking me who he should flirt with and sleep with. I am very very hurt by this. After a lot of argument, I said fine whatever. He came back today and said he kissed someone and he is hoping to have sex with her soon. he came into bed with me and insisted that i should participate in a threesome with other women. he says he has free pass now, i cannot say anything. he also insisted that we should swing and him sleeping with otherwomen is non negotiable from now on.

He refuses to listen to anything I say and just keeps harping that I am using his words as a justification. I am very hurt by this and wonderin what to do. Feel like a door mat that can be fucked when he wants and treated like crap when he wants. Almost feels like he tricked me into this. I dont know what do!!!

thanks for listening Sup Forums

even if i dont get any replies even just typing all this out has been very cathartic

It's his fault, make him pay for it. Keep fucking other guys and tell him the details but refuse to fuck him. While that cuck is trying to get his dick wet but keeps failing, he'll be at an all time low self esteem wise. Divorce him while doing this.

Coming from another women who pick up chicks with my boyfriend. This is unexeptible and manipulative behavior. He basically talked you into doing this so he would have a free pass with other women and so he can let his aggression out on you. When ever you let anyone else into the bedroom all party's should be happy. OP for the love of god you are right for being upset gtfo.

Seriously show us your buttholes don't be lame af

wtf no

smh don't you hoes know profound wisdom comes at a price?

That price is anus

should have stuck to your values.
when the nude massage came about, should have said "nope. I am out of here."
You're a slut (using him as an excuse) and he is a bipolar manipulative asshole.

...

This.
Although Hubby waivered on his rules.
WE DONT

Okay, while I see your point, things said when having sex/in the heat of the moment aren't a great thing to go off of.
I tell my husband to kill me when we fuck, but I'm still here. Because its a heat of the moment thing.
That said I think you both need to sit down, with no arousal and figure this out. Maybe let him fuck one girl to make it "even". Regardless, you two need to need to have a rational, no arousal, no name calling discussion.
My husband and I have had a few of these because I miss fucking girls, but I don't want to fly off the handle in a threesome.

so now do you prefer Sup Forums ?

ya

You are fucked. Break it off completely right now or continue to be his doormat forever, but you have to pick one. My husband did something similar to me except he has all the money and threatened to throw me out/divorce me. Now I am basically his bitch, which I guess I am ok with.

where was erotic massage at? what did the guy look like?

the erotic massage parlor was on the outskirts of downtown, down some stairs and into a sketchy little basement

the guy was really attractive. tall, fit, hung and black

When keeping it 50 shades of grey goes wrong

Your husband is learning there's a big big BIG difference between fantasies and reality.

This is why every woman has a rape fantasy, and why almost no woman is foolish enough to try to act them out (not that it's not fun when it works, it's that it usually doesn't and it's incredibly dangerous).

I'm sorry you're having to pay the price for your husband learning this lesson.

Best of luck in figuring out where the two of you go from here.

Something about this response made me laugh so hard

green text your story

did he have his cock out? how long did it take you to cum?

burn the coal pay the toll

he was naked. We used almost the whole 30 minutes, but it started at as a massage, so it's not like he was fingering me the whole time

>Now this is something I have been categorical since day 1, that I dont like this

Then you shouldn't have slept with another man.

sorry you have 2 kids with the guy, get out asap

Whether he means to or not he's being hugely emotionally abusive/manipulative. What you did was a misunderstanding, the extent of his response makes me suspect he intended to flip it on you and use it as some sort of emotional weapon.

Either get the both of you into some hardcore talk everything out therapy where everything can be communicated or beat him to the divorce

umpopular opinion but at this point you should either stop your "plays" or divorce this is not going to end well.

That's bullshit. She's a fucking adult and didn't have to fuck anyone else. If she was that uncomfortable with it she wouldn't have done and instead divorced him because they were incompatible.

Obviously she wanted to fuck someone else. She wasn't raped.

This

thats hot, did he get hard ? what was his cock like? do u usually cum from fingering?

Cringe

aye user's right cuck him hard

Thank you, glad someone agrees with me