A-user, I-I like you very much. Do you want to be my Boyfriend?

>A-user, I-I like you very much. Do you want to be my Boyfriend?

Wat do?

bareback her

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh suck me cock

no thanks im gay

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360 and walk away

That depends. Can she pass the butthole test? Lube up a sharpie and see if she can clench tight enough to keep it from falling out.

If you have a dick, yes, if not, sorry, I don't think this might work

Ciena Pyter

Tell her she has to eat all the eggs

you would be going the same direction, idiot

(greentext) fucking newfags (/greentext)

turn 359640° and collapse from exhaustion

>Mentally remind myself that all i have to do is say yes over 1000 times
>"Y-you too"

Fuck her right in the pussy.jpg

Take her to flavor town of course.

Hey there pretty little girl, before that I need to you to earn my trust, say you have some nice bottom on you girl, why don't you just pull down your jeans nice and slowly.

OH MY what a nice little hole we have here!
>sniff
Mmmm that's such a pretty little butthole girl let me get in there and givem here a lick pretty thing
>licks the asschess shits from the dirty wet farty buthole
mm that's a good babby buthole mmm such a rice asscheese! very good one girl! now lets see it's how is done like the good girl!
>puts a bongis in a buthole
OH YEAH BABY OH YEAH YOU IS MY BABY TONIGHT OH YEAH SEX!
>girl is robot and trys to kill me but I stop her and disable her with button in side buthole

BABY I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME!

Say no because I'll just ruin the relationship like I did every other time.

Wake up

Ahhh, you know what? I'm cool.

I've been in a lot of relationships and to be honest, women are a shit load of work for very little reward.

We can still be friends though. You can call me, sometimes, when I'm not busy and stuff.

m8 if someone "likes" me then they genuinely need psychiatric help.

I reject this retarded fantasy.

could you learn to love another or are those days gone user?

>Can you cook?

With you there brotha. Perpetual loneliness isn't so bad if you realize how much time and money you save. You'll still be a pathetic/fat/autistic asshole with a personality of a used gym sock but at least there's no tie downs.

Not even makin fun, I'm for real on this one.

Oh yeah, ive seen the upside as well. I managed to stave off getting fat so far, but the rest of its true.

Gotta play the hand I was dealt i suppose.

I feel yah. I'm working off being fat. I'm still pretty much on the spectrum (not officially diagnosed but I can't afford that shit anyways).

Smooth sailin brotha. Good things will happen, maybe not the good things your parents told you would but still good things I'm sure.

peace.

Hey baby, do you like spaghetti?
>tips fedora
Looks like it's time for me to skedaddle if you sniff my drift.

Why? So you can marry me, have kids, bitch about everything, cheat on me and somehow still make it my fault, file for divorce, fight for custody, take half my shit and have me pay child support to your lazy cheating ass for the rest of my life while you go around sucking every dick you come across? Yeah sure let's go down that route.

Good luck friend.

Let me think
>she gets nervous and pees her self with her legs shaking
No
>She craps her self and cries.
>Her shit and piss is flooding out of her pants like a firehose
>She fall on her knees and her she breaks out of embarrassment and trauma, her crying and bodily functions get more intense
>Has a seizure from loss of body fluids and I feed her my piss and rape her dehydrated and twitching little body, breaking her tight holes and stretching them to great extents.

>implying i want friends, let alone a girl

walk 360 and turn upside down

i will find you and kill you

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This. This is Sup Forums incarnate.

This hits too close to home.

I can relate

Yup,women are only good for their pussy and nothing else,they are only better at ruining your life

this is the original

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those three are me

>A-user, I-I

keep dreaming, OP. It's free.

kek

Lmao

Fucking delet this.
Holy shit I could have go out with 3 qts. I WANT TO KILL MY PAST SELF

...

kek

Say no out of nervousness then come to Sup Forums and start a thread that says "so I just rejected the girl of my dreams what do?"

What?

As If she'd be the one going all spaghetti

Folks don't realize how great repression is. I mean if you don't have it, don't need it or don't have the drive or capability to get it, why waste time and energy?

Everyone's always bullshitting saying "do this and you'll be happy... come on user if you just did this then you'll be alright! Go against the grain and take what you want!"

Sometimes contentment is just fine too. It's not going to put you in a history book, or make you the happiest person in the world, but at some point you'll find some weird equilibrium and balance to be able to exist on the terms that you can live with, not even ones you set for yourself.

Be happy to be alone. There's a lot of people out there who don't think they are who go to sleep every night asking themselves why they feel like a useless piece of garbage cause they have a million friends and seem to have it made.

Ungrateful pricks, but also maybe even lost in their own selves because they didn't take the time to realize what they wanted, by lavishing themselves in the things they were told would "make them feel good," without taking the time to actually understand what makes someone feel good via their own individual self sustenance.

You are strong and worthy of my seed
You are accepted into the ranks of my Harem

>A-user, I-I like you very much. Do you want to be my Boyfriend?
you spin around 360 degrees and tip your fedora
>well that depends, can you pass my butthole test?
>w-what? user, you're creeping me out
you reach into your pockets and take out the sharpie and lube that's part of your EDC for some reason
>THE TEST! THE BUTTHOLE TEST! here, lube this up and-
>ewww! you are such a freak! don't talk to me ever again!
>tch! nothing personel kid

>wake up from my dream
>realize my dick is hard
>jack off thinking about my dream girl
>cum
>wipe off with sock
>eat
>start drinking again and continue leading my normal life of crippling alcoholism and depression

damn this shit is dpressing as fuck.

fuck off

Fuhkin, this

...

Good news, it's a trap

be her boyfriend... are you retarded OP?

i came to this thread expecting shitty jokes
mfw i got feels instead

holy shit

or perhaps walking backwards?
>inb4 someone calling me a newfag

...

Let's do what couples do, then.

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>She likes you enough to ask you to be her boyfriend
>She'd call you a freak and ask you to never talk to her again after you weirded her out with a lube sharpie
>It was all a ruse to begin with

Stop watching so much anime fag

this

kek

Fuck man

Fuck

Shooot up the school, fam.

no man
this dude will piss on you while you beat him

Hug her and hold her as long as she wants. Think how she can like me because there are chads amd blacks which she like and they would just use her.Then would find out what she is, why she like me and other stuff. I would threat her as something special as what she is.

jeezus
this thread is making me feel way too much

I'd shit on her feet.

Dang

>Wat do?
Find out if she swallows cum and takes it up the ass.

Saying no is the deal breaker!

Wake up.

Holy fucking shit, why didn't you say something earlier?

No.

haha

Firecracker up her ass, light it.

SWEET