Hey does anybody who took a LOT of science courses in high school or college know how I can easily and cheaply splice...

Hey does anybody who took a LOT of science courses in high school or college know how I can easily and cheaply splice my DNA with that of a python so I can detatch my jaw and eat massive shitlogs out of Andy Sixx's sexy asshole?

Pls help

Kek

If you concentrate you can make it

I'm sure you could just attach the DNA to a retrovirus that would repogram your body exactly the way you envision it, happens all the time.

I've been watching animal planet all day and trying to eat big pieces of bread and shit (not literal shit) but nothing that would probably impress Andy Sixx

True would that be like licking urinals or blowing/ sucking on public door handles or what?

Andy's cream...

How do I get rotovirus tell me faggot or I will fuck you

Quality thread OP.

You're next motherfucker give me the code for rotovirus or I I'll fuck my own mouth and shit semen at you. I want to please Andy and be a slithering snek MOTHER FUCKER

Idk dude probably break into a lab at night.

Are you a fan of Andy Sixx and his warm creamy loaves?

Kek HIV is a retrovirus
>this faggot is literally begging for AIDS

This is a good idea what's the plan which air vent do I slide down on the roof?Wait do I need retrovirus or rotoviral aids? We which one splices best with snake dna?

That's the whole point I want to be part snake so I can impress Andy when I ingest his fecal communion

I wanna suck that steaming gleaming dung log

Good news. You don't need to impress andy.

He loves everyone and believes every man, woman, and child on earth deserves a log.

I suppose you're right. Still wanna splice my genes with snek aids tho just cuz it would be badass. I bet the code to the snake rotovirus HIV incubation chamber is "sixx sixx sixx"

I want to also get some hamster sperms and maybe a nuclear waste barrel and somehow parle that into having hamster cheeks for hoarding logs any science fags know if there's a basis for this to work?

You want hiv for its retroviral properties. It contains reverse transcriptase which allows its RNA to be converted to DNA. It puts a copy of the DNA into your cells DNA. You would replace just a small part of the virus, the one with the negative effects, and replace it with snek DNA. Good luck doing this, viruses are so small they can't be observed by a microscope.

>so small they can't be observed by a microscope
I'll just use a stethascope
I'm fine with the negative effects of snake HIV just want that badass log munching jaw. How long should I microwave this shit do you think?

Firstly nothing worth having is cheap in a capitalist environment. Equipment is a must in this endeavor and that's whats going to be the most cost. I would estimate you need at least 100 centrifuges to experiment with binding agents and extraction chemicals. If you ran all 100 centrifuges for about 3 years, testing various compounds, you might be successful in extracting all of the genes from a snake. After successfully extracting the gene my estimation for sequencing the DNA is about 5 years, given you would have to mutate about 2k snakes in the process of discovering the specific gene, or genes necessary for this evolutionary trait. After the gene has been successfully extracted you next step would be to find a proper binding agent for impregnation of the human genome. Mostly science is reliant on radiation to mutate, the human genome with unpredictable results. Your main task would be to find a cost effect way to alter your entire body without causing as much damage as possible. If you are successful at altering human DNA without damaging the any other genome your name will probably go down in the history books next to the other greats like Marie Curie, Louis Pasteur. At that point I would hope you would be able to afford a blender capable of grinding down the logs you so want to suck.

Which end of the snake should I fuck? They get pregnant at both ends I'm assuming. How will I know which snek has HIV?

Thanks for replying. My attention span is more like 2-3 hours max, we're gonna need to get crackin

Also I'll just use a microwave to cram the snake genes into me... It doesn't "hurt" my food, shouldn't damage my genes either. I mean I've never seen a toaster strudel get up and walk away! But holy shit, intardasting, your right! a blender would work if I could conceal it some how....
This is now a stealth blender thread talk to me anons

Rolling for a creamdream